So this one's like seven drabbles in one…also all metaphorical and shit, so don't take any of them completely at face value. And just think, my original vision for this was fluffy as hell. Jeezus.
People ask me why I don't write happier stories XD There's a funny one next, but enjoy the angst~
40. Sin
Envy commits every sin when it comes to Edward Elric.
jealousy
His own; his strongest. Edward stole what should have been his. A loving mother. A father, even for a few short years. Memories. Humanity. A brother. A home. But Edward has so much more than that that Envy wants; Edward is beautiful. Envy wants that but can't fully replicate it (he'll always just be a shadow). Edward is strong. (Envy will shatter with enough force, if the right person delivers it.) Edward is compassionate. (Envy tries, he does, but he can't quite seem to care about those pesky humans.) Edward is everything Envy isn't and that's why he hates him.
...greed
Envy wants to take not just everything Edward has, but everything Edward is – wear him like a second skin and drink in the love and goodwill given to him like gifts by everybody around him. He wants all of it, without fail. And if he was Edward, he wouldn't stop there – he would reach out and take everything, all the world and the universe and the universes beyond had to offer because he would be Edward Elric, and he could. He doesn't know why Ed hasn't yet. Because to be honest, greed is just second nature to sins like him.
….gluttony
When he sees Ed, he has the urge to eat and eat – not just eat, but just to utterly consume him. He just looks so…so…perfect. Envy's never tasted human, and he never will unless it's Ed, but something about the Fullmetal Alchemist just makes him so hungry. And it doesn't matter what he stuffs into the big empty hole in his big empty stomach, he can't stop being hungry. Only one thing will fill him, and he won't break his centuries-old vow of vengeance for a simple hope that maybe a single piece of gold will stop him from starving.
…sloth
Envy really should be doing more. Killing Edward and Alphonse should be his main goal. But he finds himself spending more time watching and less time chasing, more time enjoying and less time taunting, more time dreaming and less time screaming. He somehow can't find the energy to chase Fullmetal for another useless battle – or to defy Dante and finally be permitted to kill his brothers. It's lazy of him, but he's over four hundred years old now– surely he's allowed a rest every now and again. Maybe if he waits long enough, Ed will drop dead on his own.
…..wrath
He hates him so much! He can't even find the words in this pesky language to articulate the wrath that's captured him now. He just hates Edward Elric. HATES. Because suddenly his dreams are a lot less bloody, no matter how he tints them and thinks of weapons or even tries to use his own bare hands. Because suddenly hating Edward Elric is getting harder. So obviously he needs to work harder at it. Hate. Hate. Hate. Don't think of how beautifully sad he is in the rain. Hate him. Don't think… just stop thinking. He hates Edward Elric…he must.
….lust
His body's a mess, and he didn't even know he was susceptible. Dante knew. That bitch. Edward – he must know, somehow. He's doing this on purpose, taking off his jacket to show off his flesh arm and how sculpted and tan it is. He's doing this on purpose, strolling through Envy's dreams (always daydreams, because sleeping is such a human thing) with fewer and fewer clothes, beckoning and teasing and pleading. He didn't even know this was possible. Are hate and lust so close together that even Envy, the most hateful of all, could want his rival so, so badly?
….pride
There was no other way, when it came right down to it. His purpose was gone, sublimated in seduction and sweat. His drive was lost, his meaning blurred. He was nothing. He might as well be…might as well be human. Hateful thought. He was just glad he knew where the bones were, how to do it even without alchemy, because to ask Dante for help was too far for his already shattered pride. "See you on the other side…Edward Elric." And then Envy was gone, because seven sins is too much for anybody to hold at once, on their own.