A Very FaBerry Glee-verse-part VIII-Grilled Cheesus
By Shiney1983
A/N: OMG! Two weeks, two chapters, say it ain't so! But it is! I can't promise an update once a week. Lord knows I'd never keep to that, but I can shoot for at least one every couple weeks, deal? Please keep up your end of this bargain and review okay? It really does make me want to post faster when I know you all are having as much fun with my version of GLEE as I am. The responses to the last chapter all made me smile, I swear. I love you all!
Once again, things are fairly straight-forward in this chapter. I fleshed out some things that the show ignored, tweaked others to fit my story, but a lot remains the same. It turned out to be a lot of filler and necessary progression, but I'm proud of it nonetheless. I am sorry it's so short though. Forgive me?
Without further delay, I very humbly present my version of…"Grilled Cheesus."
Disclaimer: I own nothing belonging to GLEE, including any dialogue I borrowed straight from episodes for my own purposes. Also, any songs mentioned belong to the original artists.
"Is there something on my face?"
Quinn shook her head at the sound of Rachel's voice. "Huh?"
The diva huffed, "You were staring, for an inordinately large amount of time. You even missed Giles' slides. That's your favorite part!"
Quinn blinked twice, had she really been zoned out that long?
"So is there," Rachel asked again, irritation creeping into her voice.
Quinn tried to focus. Rachel had asked her something, apparently more than once, but, for the life of her, Quinn had no idea what it was!
"Huh," she mumbled again.
This time the tiny brunette's face twisted with concern. "Quinn, are you feeling alright?"
"I'm fine," the blonde lied, "I just…I…uhh, have to go to the bathroom.
"Okay," came Rachel's replied, though the girl wasn't persuaded. "Do you want me to pause?"
"That's okay," Quinn stood and flashed what she hoped was a reassuring smile. "I'll be right back."
Before Rachel could reply, Quinn fled the Berry's modest den as fast as her legs could manage.
Once she reached the bathroom, the hazel eyed girl turned the cold water on full blast. With vigor, she splashed her face; not once, not twice, but three times!
Quinn was going mad, she had to be. The blonde had never been driven insane before, but this had to be what it felt like.
It had been nearly two weeks since Rachel had kissed Quinn in an empty classroom at McKinley. Fourteen days, three hundred thirty six hours, twenty thousand one hundred sixty minutes…not that Quinn was counting.
Since then though, the singer had informed the ex-cheerleader that the two couldn't kiss again until Rachel was boyfriend free.
Worse yet, Rachel couldn't merely dump Finn, it would hurt her integrity.
Quinn had suggested some painful, albeit tactless ways, to remove the lumbering teenager from their lives.
Rachel had laughed, scolded the blonde a little, and then refused. The brunette reasoned that it had to be Finn's choice, his idea, or the diva's word was worth nothing.
Rachel swore she was working on it, coming up with ideas, but Quinn knew she was stalling. As much as the petite songstress may have wanted to explore her feelings for Quinn, the blonde knew Rachel didn't want to hurt Finn.
It made sense. For as much as Quinn didn't want to admit it, the footballer had been both she and Rachel's first love. Well, first boyfriend, anyway. Quinn wasn't sure about the love part.
Quinn knew too, that learning his first two girlfriends now had feelings for one another, would wound the boy deeply.
Quinn didn't want that, she still had a soft spot for the lumbering teen. Quinn just wanted Rachel…like all the time. If Quinn were being honest, it's all she thought about anymore. If she were doing homework…Rachel, cleaning the house…Rachel, reading a book…Rachel, even in church…Rachel, Rachel, Rachel.
Quinn couldn't even think of a way to get Finn out of their lives because any time her mind had a tiny bit of freedom, a short statured brunette entered it.
Quinn had agreed to go back to being the diva's best friend until she could have more, but at this rate she'd end up in a nut house or a morgue before that happened.
The blonde groaned. She had to go back downstairs. Rachel would be worried, and would soon come looking, maybe she'd even gather a search party.
Quinn chuckled internally; then groaned again. She even found neuroses she imagined Rachel to have adorable. Man, she had it bad!
Sighing, Quinn made her way back to the couch, and to the brunette who was the source of her madness.
As luck would have it, just as Quinn felt the smallest ounce of peace, Tara slipped her hand into Willow's.
"Aww," Rachel murmured under her breath.
Quinn tensed. Just as she had predicted, and feared, Rachel's hand found hers.
Quinn sighed for the millionth time that day. 'It's gonna be a long night,' she thought, 'I wonder how Santana does it.'
Kurt Hummel sat in the waiting room at Lima Memorial Hospital with his head against the wall and his eyes closed. Though he was surrounded by members of the glee club, his second family really, he'd never felt more alone.
As he looked around the room he noticed that everyone in the room seemed to have somewhere they belonged, someone they belonged to.
Brittany and Santana were lying on a double-sized pullout couch. Kurt noted with amusement, however, that the Latina and the blonde weren't taking up very much space, as they were contently curled around each other. The boy diva shook his head. He wondered, when if ever, the snarky cheerleader would swallow her fear and tell the blonde dancer what everyone who knew the pair already knew.
For a moment Kurt mused what the duo was doing there, they were barely friends, but he decided it didn't really matter. Anyway, he and Brittany were sort of friends, given that they had "dated" for a while. The blonde had probably wanted to be there for Kurt, as she seemed to be for almost anyone, and had drug Santana with her, however reluctantly.
Finn and Rachel were in the back corner. The oafish footballer had his arms protectively around the tiny diva, while the girl slept curled into his chest.
Kurt smiled fondly at his stepbrother. He knew their relationship was a bit strained at the moment, but he had always had a soft spot for Finn. He was happy that Finn and Rachel were happy together, however fleeting the moment. Kurt knew they didn't belong together, but he hoped they'd both figure that out with time.
The male soprano furrowed his brow as he realized someone that was there when he'd last looked around was absent now. His forehead scrunched as he attempted to pull the memory from his sleep deprived brain…Quinn.
Absently the boy speculated as to the presence of the hazel eyed blonde. Not that he didn't appreciate Quinn support, he did. Kurt was deeply thankful for the thoughts and time of all his friends, however misguided, in the two days since his dad's hospitalization. The time the shorter blonde had spent there just simply didn't make sense, that's all.
Brittany and Santana he could reason away.
Finn and Rachel had every right to be here. Even though Kurt had initially forgotten to inform the taller boy of Burt Hummel's condition, Finn had been right in the choir room today. In their own unique way, the Hummel-Hudsons had formed a family.
So where did Quinn fit?
Maybe her being there was about Finn. True, the football star and the ex-cheerleader had broken up quite some time ago. Still, Kurt suspected some sort of connection between the two teens remained. The blue eyed boy sincerely hoped that Quinn didn't want to reunite with Finn though. He hoped the blonde knew, just as Rachel could, that she could do so much better.
For Kurt's part, he really wished he could meet his one and only. The prince that would forever hold his hand, support his dreams, and in general sweep him off his feet.
The wavy haired brunette sighed. He had been feeling desperately lonely lately; a fact that was getting harder to hide. For so long, it had been Burt and Kurt Hummel versus the world. Then his dad met Carole, and ever so slightly the Hummel men drifted apart.
He was happy to see his dad so happy, but for the first time in his life Kurt felt like he was on his own…a feeling that was sure to increase if…
He hadn't told Burt any of his thoughts two days ago of course, but that was the reason the younger Hummel had fought so hard to attend this year's "Sound of Music" sing-along. He was hoping to meet someone. When his dad said he was disappointed in him, he'd wanted to scream, 'you just don't understand,' and now…
"Coffee," a voice broke into Kurt's thoughts. Standing in front of him, Quinn held a steaming cup of the standard hospital swill. "Or should I say, the dark water that passes for coffee here," the blonde tried again, smiling.
Kurt chuckled. "Thanks," he said, taking the pro-offered beverage.
Quinn sat beside him and was silent for a moment. "Penny for your thoughts," she spoke, breaking the quiet.
"Quinn," Kurt started softly, "do you believe in soul mates, that there is one perfect person out there for all of us? Or do you think we are all just thrown together to end up with whoever suits us at the moment?"
"Hmm," the blonde mused, "I think I believe in soul mates, although my faith is not as strong as it used to be."
"And," the boy continued, "please don't think I'm prying but, do you think you've found that person? Do you have someone?"
The hazel eyed girl sighed, and chanced a glance at the duo in the corner, a look that was not lost on her male companion. "I have…" Quinn paused to find the right word, "…a possibility."
Kurt looked down and his lip quivered. "Quinn, don't waste time waiting on a possibility. None of us know how long we have here. Look at my dad, he's only just found Carole and now…" the brunette's trailed off as his voice broke on the last word.
Quinn's heart broke for Kurt. She wanted desperately to comfort her fellow glee clubber, but was at a loss as to how. Quinn often found comfort in her faith, but Kurt didn't share it.
So, the blonde's mind went to a place it so frequently ventured to now…Rachel. How might the tiny songstress comfort her fellow diva? Within moments, Quinn knew. Wordlessly, she found Kurt's hand and quietly started to sing...
"When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother 'What will I be? Will I be pretty? Will I be rich?' Here's what she said to me: Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera, what will be, will be."
Kurt smiled the tiniest smile. He liked the song very much, always had. From the time he was little, that particular ditty had been a great source of confront for him. In fact, Kurt couldn't quite recall them, but he had vague memories of his mom singing it to him before she died.
Also, Quinn had a lovely singing voice. Kurt couldn't fathom why she didn't exercise it more.
In a show of solidarity and appreciation, Kurt squeezed the blonde's hand and sang…
"When I grew up and fell in love, I asked my sweetheart, 'What lies ahead? Will we have rainbows, day after day?' Here's what my sweetheart said: Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera, what will be, will be."
Quinn returned Kurt's smile glad her song selection seemed to offer the boy some measure of comfort.
The two singers let out a simultaneous sigh as they silently agreed to finish the song together. Both blonde and brunette were still unsure where their futures would take them, but one thing was certain. Today, with a very simple song, Quinn Fabray and Kurt Hummel had offered each other comfort and friendship.
"Now I have Children of my own. They ask their mother, 'What will I be? Will I be handsome? Will I be rich?' I tell them tenderly: Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera, what will be, will be. Que sera, sera."
"Quinn?"
The blonde exhaled. She knew Rachel would find her here, in the first floor bathroom, but Quinn supposed there was really no point in avoiding the inevitable. This conversation would have to happen sooner or later.
She didn't turn around. She didn't think she could. Still, she couldn't help meeting brown eyes in the bathroom mirror. "You're not going to break up with him, are you?"
Rachel seemed surprised by the question, unprepared even. It took the brunette a moment, but she nodded, regretfully. "I can't, not right now."
Quinn laughed bitterly and Rachel gingerly stepped toward her.
"Quinn, please try to understand," Rachel spoke as though she could barely make her voice audible. The ex-HBIC even thought the songstress might be afraid. "He needs me right now. His academic and extra-curricular year did not begin on the most amenable terms, and now with Burt's condition so uncertain, it would be cruel."
Quinn gripped the sides of the sink. She felt like she may actually break the porcelain, though that would be fitting. She felt broken inside. Maybe, in some ways she always had. "It'll always be something," she replied in to the sink.
"I don't believe that's so. There's a real possibility that once Kurt's dad is out of the woods, Finn will-"
This time the taller girl's laugh sounded more defeated than bitter. Kurt words from the day before hammered in her mind like a warning, a siren. "I can't hang on to a 'possibility,' Rachel," she stated, spinning on her heel to face the girl.
"I'm not sure I understand…"
"We can't be together." Those four words broke Quinn's heart, yet she steeled herself, and continued. "It probably wouldn't have worked anyway; I'm no good for you."
"Quinn, please-"
She heard Rachel and kept talking, she had to. "You belong with Finn. Like you said, he needs you."
"And you don't?" The hurt was evident in the diva's question, and it almost made Quinn stop, almost. She knew she had to keep going though. She had to break her own heart before Rachel could. It would only hurt more the longer she stuck around.
Tears sprang to Rachel's eyes. The petite girl hated them. Moreover, she hated that the blonde in front of her was, more often than not, the cause of them. "Please Quinn," she begged, "Please don't do this, not again. You're my best friend. Just give me time and we'll…"
Time was a luxury Quinn couldn't afford. She felt like she couldn't breathe. She was suffocating in this bathroom. Rachel didn't understand, would never understand, yet she continued to plead her case. The words left Quinn's mouth before she could stop them. "God, Rachel, can't you ever just shut up?!"
Rachel looked horrified. She took five steps back and hit the door. She fumbled for the knob as her hand shook. Still, her eyes never left Quinn's.
The blonde looked as though she were going to be sick, felt that way too. Her brain was screaming at her to apologize, take it all back, and comfort Rachel somehow. Alas, her body remained frozen along with her mind. As soon as the bathroom door closed, a sound that seemed to echo forever, Quinn sank to the floor, racked with sobs.
That was the night Rachel spoke with Finn about their future, and allowed the boy a small advance in relationship. After all, Rachel figured, she and Finn loved each other, and the boy would never purposely hurt her. Besides, what else, or more accurately, who else did she have?
Quinn heard the soft knock on her bedroom door, but she didn't even bother to move, let alone speak to the person intruding on her self-imposed pity party.
"Quinn," a voice questioned, and the addressee laughed internally. Brittany, of course it would be Brittany.
"You didn't come to school today," the taller blonde continued, sensing Quinn wouldn't respond. Brittany bit her lip and turned toward Quinn's dresser, where she spied the girl's cell phone. "I texted you, did you know that?" Quinn's only answer was more silence. "When you didn't answer, I got worried, so…
Quinn could almost feel Brittany moving closer to the bed. She wanted to protest when she felt her bed dip beside her, but she didn't have the strength. Seconds later, strong arms wrapped around her and equally muscular legs entangled themselves with hers. Quinn let out a shaky breath. Even though she thought her eyes had finally gone dry, fresh wails escaped her throat.
"Shh, it'll be okay Quinn. I'm right here," Brittany whispered, gripping her friend's body tighter each time it shook.
After what felt like hours, though only minutes had passed, Quinn's cries subsided, and she turned to face her friend. "Britt," she started softly, her voice hoarse from tears, "Do you love Santana? I mean like…really love her?"
Brittany nodded.
"And does she love you?"
Another nod, followed by an unsure, "I think so…"
"Then you have to make her face her feelings; make you guys a public thing, because otherwise…" Quinn trailed off and faltered, but only for a moment, then she continued, more confident than ever, "what do you really have?"
Brittany shook her head, as tears shone in her own eyes now, threatening to spill. "I can't, she isn't ready…I…I'll lose her."
Quinn could hear Brittany's heart breaking as she spoke, but she knew the other blonde needed to hear this. It was time Santana put up or shut up. Brittany deserved so much more than what she had become accustom to. Brittany, too, deserved more than a possibility.
Blue eyes searched hazel ones, desperate and pleading, as Quinn spoke the truth that Brittany knew, but tried so hard to ignore. "You don't really have her now, not all of her, not the way you should."
"I know, but…"
"It's time, Britt," Quinn pushed, as she found the girl's hand and gave it a squeeze. "Start slow; give her a safe place to do it, like glee club. She loves you Brittany, give her a chance to show it. Then if she can't," Quinn paused, both to contemplate the weight of her next statement, and to wipe away a tear as it slid down Brittany's cheek. "If she can't," she repeated slowly to make sure Brittany understood, "find someone who can."
"Thanks, Q," Brittany murmured, as she scooted closer to Quinn again to hug her. "I'm glad we're friends again."
Quinn's laugh vibrated both girls' bodies as they embraced. "We were always friends Ducky," she said, resurrecting a childhood nickname that always made Brittany smile, "and you're welcome. Now, go get your girl!"
A/N: Well that's it. What'd you guys think? Now I'm off to write "Duets," which I'm sure will be painstakingly difficult. I hope to have it finished and posted by late next week. Until then, please take a few minutes to review, huh. I love hearing what you guys think, even if it's not on par with my thoughts. Thank you so much for giving me the time.