Vode An arc

A Cool Night

His bruised skin still damp from the shower, Chopper stared into his locker chest chewing on the inside of his cheek as he contemplated the long-sleeved shirt and the long night pants.

Fives was sitting on his bunk, a piece of armor in his hand. He had nodded softly when Chopper had come into the barracks with a towel around his waist and another draped over his shoulders. But he'd given no more than the nod and he hadn't stared at the visible scars.

With deliberation Chopper reached into his chest of items and pulled out night shorts. It was too warm for the long sleeves, too warm for the long pants. Everyone had seen the scars on his chest and back in the fight it and it didn't seem to matter too much to Echo or Fives. They had sat his line, and would have sat the slot if the captain hadn't called it. After the fight Chopper had called them, all of them, friends and no one objected. Coric had invited him to play sabacc that evening after Coric's shift was finished and he was actually contemplating it. Echo ate with him most of the time, each of them with their respective data pads, while Fives had told him about Zeltros and much of the gossip that made the rounds. It was good to just sit in the barracks and listen to them.

Ripping open the virgin plastic of the shorts, Chopper pulled the towel from his waist and tossed it into the corner rag-catch. Echo was on duty but Chopper looked at Fives from the corner of his eyes. Fives was immersed in cleaning the shoulder bell of his armor. A paint bottle of black was in front of him. He'd seen Chopper's chest and back during the fight with Kev. Chopper licked his lips nervously, and quickly pulled on the night shorts then turned to face Fives with a stoic expression.

Waiting.

Fives glanced up from cleaning his armor and took in the extent of Chopper's scars. He stopped for a moment and tilted his head. "I wondered how far down they went." Then he bent back to the shoulder bell of his armor.

"Echo told you about them? Before the fight?" Chopper frowned; Echo hadn't seen his legs only the area covered by his shirt. "You didn't react too much when I pulled off the shirt." He hadn't reacted too much now, actually seeing the scars on Chopper's legs.

Fives shook his head and ran the cloth along the edge of the armor. He was prepping it for color, the addition of a new design. "Echo didn't have to tell me," he said softly. "It was obvious. You dressed too warm, wore the long sleeves and the long legs. You don't shower with the group, hiding in the corner when you did. You flinch when someone touches your back or shoulders, particularly your right side. You steel yourself for any touch you can't avoid." He gave a final wipe of the bell then set down the cloth and shook the little container of black. "Commander Tano gets near you, you used to tighten so much, I was afraid you'll shatter." He glanced up. "You haven't done that since being stuck in the cave with her."

Chopper clenched his fists. "You're not going to think what Kev thought, are you?"

Fives shook his head. "Whatever happened, Chopper, it wasn't that. I know that." He chuckled. "I've been on Zeltros. It wasn't that at all." He looked up into Chopper's eyes, holding them.

"It's better." Fives softly murmured to Chopper. He turned his face to the white, curved armor and was solemn as he spoke remembrance, painting on the first line of black. "Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar durasuum vod Hevy."

Chopper considered what Fives had just said. He sat on his bunk and settled in. It felt good not to be too warm. The data pad was in his hand but he flicked through some vids aimlessly. He watched Fives and waited until he was finished with the initial lines and set the armor aside to dry. Fives set down the brush and looked up at Chopper quizzically.

"I never had a brother by choice." Chopper spoke. "I envy both you and Echo for that."

"Sometimes I'm amazed at that myself. At how lucky I am to have a brother like Echo. How we mesh so perfectly most of the time." Fives laughed as he leaned back, folding his legs up on the bunk. "And how much we clash the rest of the time."

Chopper gave a small smile but his head bobbed nervously. "You've offered friendship, Fives. Both you and Echo have offered friendship to me. I'd like to take you up on it. Be friends." He shrugged slightly and glanced down at the vid in his hand, but watching Fives from the corner of his eyes. "If you haven't changed your mind."

Fives shook his head. "You're an odd one, Chopper, and I'd like to know why, but you're worth knowing. You are worth being friends with." He leaned against the back of his bed. "The other troopers know not to talk bad about you when I'm there, Chopper. They know my distaste when they call you 'three-quarter trooper'." Fives moved his hands. "I get up and walk away. Or I tell them they don't know you. Or I laugh at them." He reached for the shoulder bell and blew lightly on the drying paint. "It's fewer people than you think. Most of Torrent respect your abilities; especially at Jedi practice." Fives laughed and his brown eyes twinkled as he grinned. "You can run most of them into the ground and they know it. The medics respect you for what you've been through and yet you're willing to show then everything they ask of you during extra medical training. And this recent episode with the commander." Fives shook his head and released a breath of amazement. "How many troopers would have thought of tucking her in their shirt?"

He saw Chopper's shrug of denial. "Not many, Chopper. Not me or Echo; not even most of the medics. Most would have simply given her the suit and that wouldn't have saved anyone. Commander Tano survived because of your residual body heat after the suit died, because you were in the suit with her and your body kept its heat longer."

Chopper nodded, accepting the accolade. He swallowed again. "How do I become friends? I don't know how." Chopper's voice was soft. He was glad Fives didn't laugh.

"You talk, I guess. Sometimes listen. Share what you have, accept what you don't have." Fives smiled. "Being friends is something else they didn't teach on Kamino. We bond with our squad because that is who we grew up with, the troopers who know us best. With the bonds of squad supporting us, we can extend friendship to others." Fives shook his head. "You didn't have that, did you, Chopper? Your core group of friends died and when you were reassigned, you didn't have any…" Fives frowned as he searched for the word. "Foundation to begin with and when you started to try to make friends…." Fives shrugged. "Something happened. I don't know what, but something happened." He gave a lop-sided grin at Chopper who had turned slightly away, his face starting to turn to stone.

"Friendship, Chopper," and Fives was gratified as Chopper's face began to relax and he turned back ever so slightly. "Friendship is loyalty, understanding each other. That's easy for us clones. Sometimes it's arguing."

Chopper grinned and let a small chuckle escape. Fives and Echo were always arguing. "Thought Echo called it 'discussing'."

"All proof that friends and brothers can disagree and still be friends." Fives shrugged. "Sometimes it's vulnerability, letting your friends know your weaknesses, letting them help when you need help, letting them have your back. That's hard for us; to show someone we're weak but no one is strong in every encounter. In exchange, you provide strength for your friends' vulnerabilities when you can."

Chopper reflected on this. "I'm glad you had my back in the one-on-one." Chopper glanced down. "I didn't think of it as having my back so much as being there for the Commander. I didn't think anyone was there for me, just for the commander."

"A bit of both, Chopper. But sometimes people start as friends because they have similar experiences or thoughts. If you hadn't called one-on-one with Kev, I would have."

Chopper shook his head. "I wouldn't have offered…" he began then looked up into Fives's eyes. "You have friends, lots of friends, Fives. Your line would have stretched clear across the mess and they would have been fighting to fill your slot."

Fives eyebrows raised in question.

He frowned, "but it wouldn't…" He looked at Fives with a frown.

"Wouldn't have been the same, Chopper. Troopers would have thought they held my line because they were my friends and the jokes would continue. I'm glad you fought because most of them now realized that Kev had crossed a line. They realize Kev and the group were wrong because the captain gave up neutrality, because Kix, who doesn't really care for you, was in your line."

Chopper frowned as he thought it through. Fives reached for the shoulder bell and carefully laid down several more lines of dark paint. It was quiet in the barracks, the only noise the constant humming of the Resolute's engines, and Chopper spoke into that silence.

"I guess the easiest way is to start with my scars. So much of what happened is related or written in my scars." He gestured to his head. "Geonosis. My squad, my… brothers," Chopper realized he hadn't thought of them as brothers in a long time. "My brothers and I were in a gunship that was shot down. The door was ripped off. Tane fell out, shattered on a boulder." Chopper swallowed. "The gunship slid on the sand, hit something - maybe a boulder - and flipped. Digger was tossed around the LAAT and broke his neck. Flipping took out the pilot and turret gunners." Chopper pursed his lips and looked at Fives as he laid down a memorial pattern on his shoulder bell.

"The ship grinds to a halt, the ripped door has become the floor so I have no choice but to go up; to climb out of this burning mess. I do and before I hit the ground, some bug gets a good shot on me. A piece of my head is spattered on the gunship and I'm quite happy to join my brothers." He spread his hands, palm out. "I remember a noise. I was told that I'd also been hit by a grenade."

Chopper was silent for a moment.

"Do you say remembrance for them?"

"No," replied Chopper. "I don't say remembrance for anyone." He set the data pad onto the bed shelf. "I spend two weeks in Kamino for what happened on Geonosis. Bacta tank experimentation. The Kaminoans didn't expect me to live and when I did they asked a lot of questions and performed a lot of tests before they sent me to my next squad. I wasn't comfortable with my new squad." He gestured to the scars on his head. "None of them had scars. Their sergeant believed only men who are slow get scarred though he didn't push it too much. But also, like you said, I didn't have any experience in…" Chopper lifted his hand and gestured toward Fives.

Fives set the shoulder bell down on the locker case to dry some more. He stood, moving toward their barracks gears and pulled two bottles of water. Returning, he twisted off the cap and handed one to Chopper. Chopper nodded his thanks, shifting his feet on his bunk to make room for Fives who sat next to him.

"They were a good squad. We were on a gunship heading for Christophsis to help with the fighting and the refugees. The sergeant was saying that to me, 'Chopper, make sure to keep up.' Those were his last words."

Chopper took a swig of water then was quiet. The decking and walls thrummed with the vibration of the engines of the Resolute. "We were blown out of the sky. I survived the drop. So did the sergeant but we were transporting modified tibanna. A stray blaster shot hit the tibanna and it exploded, filling the ship with flame and sucking out the oxygen. The fire burnt itself out pretty quick but they were all dead in two, three breaths. I had life support on because I didn't like the smell of the mechanical workings. I always used to go to life support because I hated the smell."

"You don't do that anymore, Chopper."

Chopper shook his head. "No, the smells don't bother me anymore," but he didn't explain further and Fives didn't ask. "After the initial explosion, it began burning." Chopper gestured to his legs. "My bodyglove melted. Eightly-seven percent burned. That was Kamino for another four days and a couple more days' worth of questions and tests. Sergeant didn't make it." Chopper took another drink and stared at his knee.

The door opened and Echo entered, tossing his helmet onto his bunk across from Chopper's. Chopper glanced up. "Hi Echo. I'm trying to be friends. Fives says that means talking and listening." He was quiet again, chewing his lip. "I didn't know that would be so hard."

"Being friends is hard, Chopper. It means trusting and sometimes that's hard to do." Echo nodded and turned his back, popping the clips on his fore and aft. The back plate slid off and landed in Chopper's outstretched hand. Echo turned and took the back plate, then sat on his rack pulling off his armor.

"Trust." Chopper grunted. "Then there was Slick and his squad. I was assigned to a primary squad when they lost two troopers. They were all brothers from Kamino. Sketch and Punch were brothers by choice. Gus was the sergeant's pet and me and Jester were the whipping boys." Chopper shook his head. "I couldn't go a day without a demerit. But he started reasonable. 'Chopper, old boy', he'd say. 'That's just not the way we do things here.'" Chopper swallowed. "He set me up at a bar, paid a woman to get close to me then laugh at me when I tried... just a kiss."

Chopper turned toward the wall of his bunk, bringing his legs up to his chest. "Chopper, old boy, women just don't like scars." He shuddered and Echo put a hand to his naked shoulder. They were still for a moment then Chopper turned back to Fives and Echo but with his head still down. "That's a lie, you know. Other things are more important than scars. Even to women. There's more about being part of Slick's squad, but I have to ask the captain if I can tell you."

"We can wait," Echo's finished removing the armor and stripped off his body glove, tossing it to the pile of dirties, "as long as you need us to." He stood and grabbed his shower packet. "I'm not fit for the mess until I return. But shall we go there and have some caf when I get back?"

Fives glanced at Chopper with a question in his eyes. Chopper nodded. "Sounds good."

"I'll be quick." The door closed behind Echo.

Fives stared at the closed door for several moments. "If I didn't have Echo, Chopper; I'd ask you to be my brother by choice." He looked up into Chopper's eyes. "But you already have one."

Chopper frowned. He didn't have a brother by choice.

Fives nodded. "Commander Tano. You've taken her as your brother by choice. Leastwise, that's what your body tells me and it's what her body says as well. You might want to talk to her. She'd Jedi and they have different rules. And she's civilian, sort of, and a female. Female rules are really different and I only had a week's exposure. I think that's what happened in the cave. At its most basic, she trusts you and you trust her. Not only do you have her back and she yours, but you both know it."

"She told me we were friends." Chopper set his empty bottle on the shelf next to Five's mostly empty bottle as he reached to help with Echo's armor. "Can we discuss that in the mess? If no one else is there, I mean. I'd like to get some ideas on what to ask and how to approach her with that idea. Maybe being friends doesn't mean the same to civilians or women that it does to troopers."

"Probably not, Chopper. But you can always ask friends anything." Fives tapped Chopper on his knee then stood and slipped Echo's helmet into the armor lock then reached for his garrison fatigues. "Let's get ready, I think Echo is testing how efficiently he can shower." He chuckled. "So he has more time to go over the regs manual."

The mess was not quite deserted. Captain Rex was there discussing something with Coric, both men sweaty and obviously recently from the gym. Four late-nighters were having nuna eggs and topatoes with caf before going on-duty. Chopper, Fives and Echo moved toward Chopper's table in the corner when Chopper touched Fives' arm. "Just a moment, I need to speak with the captain."

As Fives and Echo moved toward the back table, Chopper strode over to where Captain Rex and Coric were discussing something from the gym. Coric's wrist was being grabbed by the captain's hand, but Coric's other hand was on the captain's wrist holding it captive. It was one of the deceptive echani holds; defense turned offense. A certain twisting motion of Coric's captive wrist would break the captain's arm if they were going fast and full strength. This was just a demonstration.

"Captain Rex sir? A quick question?" Chopper hoped he wasn't interrupting anything too important. Their caf mugs were mostly empty and they had a relaxed look that indicated they'd be leaving the mess soon.

"Yes, Chopper?" Captain Rex looked up.

Chopper chewed on his lower lip for only an instant. "May I tell Echo and Fives everything that happened when Slick was my sergeant? Including the court martial?"

"Why would you do that, Chopper?" The captain asked.

Chopper frowned. Didn't the captain approve? "They're my friends."

"You'd tell them what Slick did to you? What you did? Aren't you afraid they'll talk about it to others." Rex watched Chopper's expression and his hands.

"Only as much as you allow, sir." Chopper swallowed. "I don't think they'll tell anyone, but if they do..." He shrugged. "There's already rumors about me anyway. Friendship means trust, doesn't it?"

Rex nodded. "Tell them as much as you wish except that Slick was the traitor. If they ask anything that might lead to that, have them see me. Anything else you wish to tell them is yours to tell them."

"Thank you, sir." Chopper came to attention then turned toward Coric. "I believe I will be at the sabacc game later, Coric."

"That's good, Chopper," Coric smiled. "I'll see you then."

Fives and Echo waited at the table with three cups of caf but Chopper only took two steps before he turned back to Captain Rex. "Do you think," he began then swallowed hard and the rest of his words were soft in doubt. "The commander could consider me a kind of brother? Like she was a trooper or something?" Chopper glanced towards Coric and continued. "In the cave she said 'friends is what we are'. But I got the feeling it was more like being brothers by choice. Could she have meant that?"

Rex chewed his lip and took the last sip of caf from the mug as he looked into Chopper's face, the furrows of confusion on his forehead. "I don't know, Chopper. I know she prefers you as her second when I'm with Skywalker. She'd like you in her column, she trusts you to watch her back. Friends? She's Jedi and commander, you're clone and trooper. Brothers by choice? I don't know if it's the same."

"Thank you, sir. I'll see you tomorrow about transferring to her column." Chopper strode towards Fives and Echo.

"How odd," said Fives staring at the captain as Chopper sat at his seat.

"What's odd?" asked Echo as he glanced around the mess, at the captain and his second standing, taking their mugs for cleaning then leaving. Chopper nodded, peering intently at Fives who glanced back at him.

"He said affirmative to your first question." Fives looked at Chopper who nodded.

"I asked him if I could tell you more about what happened in Slick's squad and he said 'within limits'." Chopper gripped his mug with both hands. The caf was hot and freshly made.

"It was your second question. The captain was confused and ... disappointed."

Chopper's face was a blank mask then he blinked. A small smile curled the very corners of his lips. "I need to talk to the commander."