Chapter 26: Baby's First Words

It had been about a month since Tom had found that his father had appeared aboard, constantly following him around and taunting both his waking hours and his dreams. Scared wasn't a strong enough work to describe how he felt and the change in his behaviour had certainly been noticed. He didn't socialise, he didn't speak to anyone while on duty; he didn't even pay any attention to B'Elanna anymore. The Captain was worried, she couldn't deny that, but she had her own problems too. Being fifteen months pregnant, she knew the day her daughter was taken away from her was edging closer and closer.

She couldn't help but wonder what Q's original plan would have been if she had consented to have his baby. Had he always intended for her to leave Voyager to raise the child in the Continuum?

As the Captain approached the Bridge that morning, she saw Seven on Nine and Harry Kim exiting the turbolift arm-in-arm. She couldn't help but smile at that. She was glad that baby Magnus had acted like the needed catalyst to bring them together. They were a good match. They all greeted one another as they passed, them heading to Harry's quarters and the Captain to the turbolift. While they had just finished their latest shifts, she had the pleasure of only just starting hers.

She called for the turbolift. When the door wouldn't open, she found herself frowning. Was there a problem with the system B'Elanna hadn't informed her about?

"Computer, open the turbolift door."

There was no response from the computer at all. Strange.

Beginning to grow impatient, the Captain tapped the manual override code into the panel. That didn't work either.

"What the hell?"

"Kathryn."

A soft voice whispered from behind her, making her back go ridged. She froze, her eyes wide before her forehead began to crease. It was impossible.

Frozen in place, the Captain forced a gulp of dry air down her throat. She hadn't heard that particular voice for a long, long time. She shouldn't have either.

"Kathryn." the voice repeated in the same manner.

Feeling her eyes begin to water, the Captain refused to turn around. She couldn't.

"Kathryn." the voice said again, a soft hand appearing on her trembling shoulder.

Immediately, her teeth sank into her lip and she instinctively tried to move her shoulder away.

"Let go of me." she pleaded as the hand gripped her a little, "Please."

She felt tears roll down her face the longer she just stood there, almost petrified to turn around. She didn't want to see, she didn't want that pain. She'd lost the owner of that voice a long time ago.

"Kathryn…" the voice tried to reason, only making her shake her head adamantly.

"You're not my father." her voice was breathless, "Now, leave me alone."

Suddenly, the hand on her shoulder spun her around at a speed which made her momentarily lose her balance. However, when she felt two strong, familiar hands gently grasp under her chin, all that changed.

"Of course I am." the man insisted, making her look directly into his eyes.

She gasped. They were exactly how she remembered them.

"Kathryn." he repeated, the way he said her name making her stomach to flutter, "I know… I know I was away when you were little, but I'm here now."

She shook her head slightly, trying to pull away.

"No." she whispered, "My father died."

Sighing, the gentle-faced man shook his head, his forehead deeply creased.

"Kathryn, please." he begged, "Don't do this… don't push me away."

She shook her head. "No… no, I can't." she felt trapped, "I can't deal with this at the moment."

Stood there, the gentleman's frown eased while his hands slowly trailed down to her bump, each inch making her skin crawl. That was not a feeling her father would ever would have caused her. He'd always been her rock, the one who made her feel safer than no one ever could.

Immediately reacting to his stopped hands, the Captain felt her daughter kick, the strongest she had ever felt. It was as if she was pushing him away.

Don't trust him.

The Captain felt herself shudder. "I don't." she whispered out loud in response, not meaning to actually speak.

Instantly, the soft face of the man before her morphed into what she could only describe as something as pure evil. His once gentle, green eyes suddenly went dark and wide. His lips pressed tightly together and he stepped closer, closing her against the wall.

"What did you just say?" he ordered her to reveal.

Suddenly very nervous, the Captain shook her head. "Nothing."

Grabbing both her wrists harshly, his sharp grip tightening around them, the Captain cried out.

"Tell me what you said!" he demanded, his teeth gritted.

The pain shot up her arms. "Please, stop." she found herself begging, gasping as his grip got unbelievably tighter.

She gasped again. "You're hurting me."

As if something clicked within the man's head, his grip loosed, only a little, but enough for her to look away from his hands and towards his face. Her eyes widened at the sight of him smirking sinisterly before he erupted in a burst of energy which was forceful enough to knock her to the floor.

Commander Chakotay was in a rather good mood that morning, jollily strolling the ship he had been a part of for a number of years on his way to the Bridge. For the first time in a long time, he'd actually got to sleep in later than usual. Granted it had only been by an extra half an hour but those thirty minutes had seemed to work wonders. However, his good mood immediately changed the moment he turned the corner to see the Captain lying on her front on the floor with… was that blood?

"Kathryn?!" he cried, darting over to her and assisting her into a sitting position.

Shocked to see her in the state she was in, the Commander was unsure what to say. It was clear that she'd recently been crying and by only looking, he could see both her wrists were sporting deep cuts and were almost certainly broken.

"What the hell happened?"

Unable to explain since she wasn't really too sure herself, the Captain just shook her head.

"Come on." he said as he carefully assisted her off the floor, "Let's get you to Sickbay."

=/\=

Showing no hint of surprise as the Captain explained about her encounter with her father, the Doctor immediately dropped himself in a rather tricky situation. Now that he'd healed her wrists, he knew she was going to question him about it.

"You weren't surprised." the Captain pointed out, her one eyebrow raised as she looked towards the slightly guilty looking doctor, "Why? What haven't you told us?"

The Doctor sighed deeply, placing the instrument he was holding on the tray in front of him.

"This… hallucination you've had. You aren't the only person on-board whose had an experience like it." he began to explain before turning to face her, "Over the past few weeks, several crew members have come to me about a similar problem."

Wide-eyed and a little infuriated, the Commander couldn't suppress the following scoff.

"And we're only hearing about this now because…?" he almost cried. He couldn't believe that the Doctor had left it so long without reporting it.

Sighing deeply, the Doctor shook his head.

"Due to the nature of these problems, I had to be careful." he confessed.

He stepped away to give himself a needed moment to pause.

"I tried to explain it to both Crewman Keller and Ensign Simons last week." he continued, "But when they heard about what was causing it, they became… dangerous to say the least."

Both of the Command Team frowned. "I don't understand…" the Commander admitted.

The Doctor shook his head slowly. "They both tried to kill themselves." he explained softly, "It was as though something inside them just… snapped the moment they learnt what was causing their hallucinations."

The Captain was truly horrified. "Why the hell didn't you say anything, Doctor?" she demanded to know.

"Captain, I couldn't risk it. There's some sort of radiation on-board. It's acting like a hallucinogen on certain members of the crew. Without further examination, I can't detect who has been subjected to it."

"Which is exactly why you should have said something!" she cried.

"Captain, don't you see? Two people who have been subjected to this radiation tried to kill themselves after learning about it. In fact, you are the only person on-board who hasn't. I couldn't risk saying anything until I found out whether it was just a coincidence or if there is some sort of link,"

The Captain sighed deeply. It made no sense but medical analysis never did. It was why she became a Science Officer and not a Medical Officer.

"Is the… is the baby okay?" she had to ask.

"Do you want my honest opinion, Captain?" he asked quietly, only receiving a nod from her in response, "I think she's the only reason you're in control right now."

The Captain's frown deepened as the Doctor continued.

"I honestly believe that if you weren't carrying her, you'd have snapped right now."

Releasing a broken breath, the Captain felt herself gulp down the air stuck in the back of her throat before looking back towards the Doctor.

"But is she okay?"

Sighing, the Doctor could only shrug his shoulders. "I don't know." he answered truthfully.

The Captain pinched the arch of her nose, trying to ignore the nagging headache forming while the Commander turned to look at the Doctor.

"Doctor, where is this radiation coming from?" he asked.

The Doctor shook his head. "I have no idea, but–"

"Hang on." the Captain interrupted, looking down at her slightly lifted arms, "My wrists."

Both the Commander and Doctor turned to face her and frowned.

"What… what about them?" the Doctor asked

Lifting her head, the Captain looked between the two men.

"They were both broken." she pointed out, "How can a hallucination physically break them?"

Both the Doctor and Commander looked towards each other. That was a damn good point.

Analyse the radiation signature.

The Commander frowned when he saw her seem to zone out, only for a moment but it was enough to concern him.

"Captain?" he queried.

Quickly lifting her head, the Captain met the Doctor's eye.

"Analyse the radiation." she ordered, receiving a frown from the hologram but he soon agreed.

"Why?" the Commander asked, unsure of her reasoning.

She turned and met his eye. "Just a hunch."

=/\=

He really couldn't believe the amount of fun he was having. He'd been tantalising these beings for years and was absolutely loving it! He knew his father wouldn't approve, especially considering who these people were, but he didn't care. He was enjoying it. Besides, his father couldn't control him, his mother had given up on him. He could do whatever he wanted. There was no-one in the universe who could stop him.

"Stop!"

A harsh voice boomed after appearing at his side.

He sniggered. "This is the most fun I've had in years!" he argued, "You're not stopping me now."

"Come back to the Continuum."

"You're not the boss of me." he shot back.

The presence circled around him, something he just sniggered at. He knew they were just trying to intimidate him. It wouldn't work.

"You must return."

"You don't control me." he spat, "Now, go away!"

"Come back to the Continuum."

"I said go away!" he snapped, forcefully making them disappear against their will with a simple yet effective thought.

=/\=

"Captain, please report to Sickbay."

The Doctor's voice sharply broke through the silence on the Bridge. It was a welcomed relief for the Captain. She had found the growing silence was becoming rather unnerving. It was strange. Silence had never bothered her before. Usually she welcomed it but as she sat there that day, trying her best to read through a PADD of data concerning the ship's vital systems, the silence had begun trap her, isolate her, frighten her. She didn't like it.

Tapping her combadge swiftly, the Captain had no problem telling the Doctor she was on her way. Perhaps the radiation affecting her crew was not just causing hallucinations, perhaps it was doing more. It was the only way she could explain her sudden fear of silence.

As she made her way to Sickbay, her thoughts were plagued with possible scenarios of further encounters with her father. It had only happened once but since it couldn't be explained, there was every chance it would happen again. It was making her paranoid.

However, throughout everything that was happening, there was something else. Something new. It was a voice, but a voice that didn't frighten her like the others. She didn't recognise it – it didn't belong to anyone she knew, but it was clearer than anything.

She sighed, trying to decipher it. It was a female, that much was clear. It sounded innocent and soft yet equally as powerful and demanding. There was no other way she could explain it. She'd found it only came to her in times of trouble and it comforted her in a way she couldn't understand. She didn't know why.

As she entered Sickbay, the Captain was horrified to see the crew members in there who, quite simply, were losing their minds. It didn't take long for her eyes to fall onto who seemed to be the most affected crew member, Lt. Michelle Keller. Two medics were battling with her, one sporting a bloody lip as he held her down and the other trying to keep her cries quiet as he tried to sedate her. Fresh blood was pouring from around the Lieutenant's right eye where her nails had recently clawed at it, probably another reason the medics were trying to sedate her.

"Get out of my head!" she sobbed, "Get out!"

The Captain felt her tension mount. It was clear the poor woman was definitely hearing a voice.

With a silent release of breath, the Captain continued to look around. She saw the crew member on the next biobed, a young Ensign she couldn't name immediately, lying almost lifeless and yet awake, staring in a daze at the ceiling above.

"H. I. J. K. L. M. N…"

From what she could see, her eyes never moved, or even blinked, as she lay there. The only thing she was literally doing was saying the alphabet, over and over and over.

"O. P. Q-Q-Q. R. S. T…"

The Doctor noticed the Captain's presence and exited his office to greet her. It didn't take him long to see the tense posture she'd adopted.

"Captain?" he asked softly, gesturing her to follow him into his office.

Sighing deeply, the Captain physically had to pull herself away from looking over the crew members before she following the Doctor. It was her job to be professional and not let what was happening visibly affect her. She could always worry in her own time behind closed doors.

"What have you found, Doctor?" she asked weakly.

The Doctor sighed, his long face turning to face her. "I've analysed the signature."

The Captain nodded once. "And?" she probed.

"It's… a Q signature." he had to say.

The Captain felt her jaw tighten and fists clench the moment his words registered.

"No." she trailed off, her head slowly shaking "Tell me you're joking, Doctor… Please"

"I'm sorry, Captain. I really wish I could."

Subconsciously stroking her swollen stomach, the Captain fell back onto the Doctor's desk. She was honestly going to kill him.

Don't be like that, Mommy.

The Captain gasped, immediately gaining the Doctor's attention as her hand fell to her stomach.

"Captain?"

She simply shook her head, looking down towards her bump. "It's nothing."

Her voice was soft, her eyes transfixed on the black material hiding her baby. The voice, the one voice she'd been struggling to pinpoint. Was it her unborn daughter's?

The Doctor observed the scene before him, his Captain mesmerised as her fingers lightly tapped against her stomach. He wasn't sure what was happening but when he saw her smile grow slightly, he relaxed. It clearly wasn't a problem, whatever it was.

"Hello, honey."

A little flutter under her skin only confirmed her suspicions.