A/N: Sorry for posting this late. I was taking a much needed vacation. Enjoy :)
Prompt: Can you imagine...
Character: Brittany S. Pierce
Words: 482
Date: February 9, 2013
"Can you imagine a world without labels?" I ask wistfully, as I stroke Lord Tubbington's fat belly. He pushes into my leg and demands more than half of the space on my bed.
Then he looks at me with his judgemental eyes and I shake my head.
"No. I guess you can't. But I can," my voice quivers. Okay, maybe I just wish I could.
I've been called so many things in my short life: cheerleader, dancer, stupid, best friend, girlfriend, lesbian, bi-curious, cheater, president, slut. I feel like I'm drowning in the images other people have of me. The labels are such a small portion of who I am, or was, or could be. It's never about what I'm feeling or what I want. It's the opinion of someone looking in and deciding which box they want to put me in.
I don't like boxes. Or canons. Or any other confined space.
I like movement and fluidity.
And for a while, Santana was the only person who got that. I don't really know when or why things changed but I feel like because I was missing the label "college freshman" she thought we couldn't relate to each other any more.
"I miss Santana," I sigh dramatically. Lord Tubbington shakes his head at me. He's heard this a thousand times already. He keeps telling me to forget her. I think he was just jealous. There was never any room on my bed for him when Santana was over.
Now the bed is an empty wasteland and I let him crowd me out. Just to have his presence. Besides, I like when he purrs so loudly I can't hear my own thoughts. I like it best like that because sometimes I have more thoughts than my brain can hold. It feels like they're all bumping into each other, getting bruises and being unhappy. There are too many unhappy thoughts right now.
I don't want to be sad all the time any more.
"When was the last time I smiled?" I wonder out loud.
And then I remember. It was today. It was when I was with Sam. He made me smile today. It was the first time I've smiled in far too long.
When I think about him my thoughts seem lighter, happier even. His impressions are funny and he's kind to everyone in Glee club. I feel like I can just be me when we're talking to each other and he can just be him. I think maybe he's had a lot of people try to label him in his life too. So, he doesn't use a lot of labels. Not for me or any of his friends. Blaine isn't the gay guy. Artie isn't handicapped. They're just his friends.
And maybe, I'm a little bit more.