Horizon
Horizon was a complete mess from start to finish. Seeing the seeker swarms and their handiwork firsthand was something Shepard would never forget. The colonists with their faces frozen in terror, bodies rooted in place as they tried so desperately to run, eyes darting back and forth from Shepard to Jacob to Garrus and to the seeker swarms would haunt her dreams for years to come. One of the most disturbing things for her was how casually the pods used to load colonists on the Collector ship were strewn about. The Collectors obviously had this down to a science. This was nothing more than loading up a few crates of cargo to them.
The fight against the Collectors was no better. Fighting Collectors alone would have been bad enough. Seeing the husks threw both Shepard and Garrus for a loop. When they first encountered husks in the fight against Saren and Sovereign, husks were created using Dragon's Teeth. The towering spikes were immediate clues to what they were going to face. The husks the Collectors had were different. There were no Dragon's Teeth around, the husks were a complete surprise. These husks also looked different from the ones she faced two years ago; they even moved differently. Once they came to the conclusion that these husks were likely made by the Collectors and brought to the colony, the reality of the situation hit home. If the Collectors were turning some of the colonists they captured into husks, there's no telling what they're doing with the rest of them.
Then there was Harbinger. They were in another seemingly endless fight against Collectors when all of a sudden, one of them began to glow. The transformation reminded her of what happened to Saren after he shot himself and Sovereign took control of his body. She knew then they were in trouble. What she didn't expect was it to focus solely on her. What none of them expected was it to start speaking.
"You will know pain, Shepard." The voice of the Harbinger controlled Collector called to her while she hid behind cover. It felt like it was coming from inside her head but she knew Jacob and Garrus could hear it too because they immediately turned to her. They seemed to be just as shocked as she was. She closed her eyes, took a breath, and forced herself to focus. She couldn't afford to succumb to the fear and doubt. Not yet. She could deal with that later. For now she had to stop them from taking another colony. She snapped her Commander mask back on, detached as best she could emotionally, and began issuing orders.
"That… thing is the biggest threat now," Shepard said. "We need to get rid of it. Jacob, make sure you're using incendiary ammo. Garrus, keep other Collectors off our asses while we try to get it's barrier down. Once it's down, I'll hit it with pull and Garrus, you hit it with a concussive shot and Jacob will keep on it with the incendiary ammo. With any luck, it should fall quickly. Got it?"
"Yes Shepard." Garrus answered immediately. He moved quickly to a different piece of cover to keep the other Collectors occupied and take them out as fast as he could.
Jacob looked her in the eye before answering. It was only a second but the moment seemed to stretch on forever. Shepard felt at that moment he knew every single fear and doubt that was running through her mind at that moment. If he did, he didn't say a word about it. Maybe she was reading too much into it. Maybe she just wanted to believe he understood, that someone understood. Maybe he just knew that wasn't the time or place to address it.
"Yes ma'am." Jacob said after the moment had passed. He gave a nod then moved to complete her orders. The Harbinger controlled Collector fell fast and they made short work of the few that were left.
The garage was a respite from combat but not from the emotional battle of the day. The mechanic in the garage, Delan, gave voice to some of the doubts eating at Shepard. If only she'd been faster, smarter, stronger, maybe she could've reached the colony sooner and got some people off the planet. Maybe if she'd left The Illusive Man and gone back to the Alliance she could've been there right when it happened. Maybe she should've sent a message to Anderson or Hackett and they could've sent some type of reinforcements. The maybes, the what-ifs, the should haves, the could haves, the would haves, were eating at her more and more with each passing second. Shepard was brought out of her thoughts by a hand on her shoulder guiding her to a quiet corner.
"Shepard? Esperanza, look at me." Jacob said quietly, trying to snap her out of the trance she was seemingly in. "Are you ok?"
"What? Yeah. I'm fine. I'll be fine." Shepard said. Jacob knew this wasn't the complete truth. The slight tremor in her hand gave her away.
"I know this is getting overwhelming but you have to focus. These colonists need you now more than ever. You can still save the people left here. Focus on making sure they don't get taken too." Jacob didn't break eye contact while speaking to her. His low, steady voice helped Shepard focus on the task at hand. "Garrus and I are right here with you. You can do this. I know you can."
"Thank you." Shepard reached up to touch the hand he still had on her shoulder. She gave a nod and a small smile, and walked over to the ammo on the other side of the garage.
"Garrus, Jacob, come stock up on ammo. I doubt we'll get another chance to do this before we get to the GUARDIAN towers. If you see any heavy weapon ammo let me know." Shepard's Commander mask was firmly in place again as she started issuing orders. Jacob knew she'd be ok for the rest of the mission.
What worried him most was what would happen to her once she was back on the ship. How would she deal with the stresses of today without the distraction of a fight? Jacob and Garrus shared a look that told him they were having similar thoughts. They both moved to follow her orders and a few moments later they were on their way out of the garage to what they hoped was the last leg of the fight.
The fight to the starport was hard and brought another twisted Collector creation. The Scion was a truly twisted thing and a formidable enemy. The thought that the Collectors were turning colonists into those things made everyone's stomach turn. The fight would have been hard enough with just Collectors, husks, and the Scion. Once Harbinger decided to keep controlling Collectors the fight seemed endless. Harbinger seemed to know he was starting to get to her because he talked only to her. Garrus and Jacob saw how Harbinger was causing her to lose her focus. They decided the best way to counteract the effect he was having was to be a little more vocal than they had to be. Their voices in her ear helped to drown out Harbinger and keep him from distracting Shepard.
The starport itself was crawling with husks when they finally arrived. Jacob and Shepard's biotics were able to get rid of the bulk of them and Garrus easily took out the ones still left alive. Once all the husks were taken out, Shepard started the process of bringing the defense towers online.
"Normandy, are you there?" Shepard said after completing the hack on the defense towers.
"Joker here Commander. The signal is weak but we got you." Joker replied over the comm link.
"EDI, can you bring the defense towers online?"
"Errors in the calibration software are easily rectified but it will take time to bring the towers to full power. I recommend a defensive posture. I won't be able to mask increased generator output." EDI said.
"We need to prepare. When the Collectors figure out what's happening, we'll have a tough fight on our hands." Garrus said after a brief moment.
"That's true," Shepard said. "EDI, is there anything else we need to know?"
"Enemy reinforcements are closing in. I suggest you ready weapons." EDI replied. After the comm line was cut they had mere seconds to get into cover before reinforcements started to fly in.
They fought wave after wave of enemies, each containing a Harbinger controlled Collector and a scion. They were low on ammo and energy when things suddenly got quiet. All of a sudden, something none of them had seen before flew in. It had an insect like quality to it and in it's mouth, if you could call it that, were what looked like the heads of many husks. Shepard could feel bile rising in the back of her throat when she looked at it.
"Well, I'm glad I saved all that heavy weapon ammo." Shepard said.
"Yeah," said Jacob. "We're glad you did too."
"Ok, this thing looks like this thing is likely to have high barriers and some pretty high armor. Jacob, switch to incendiary ammo and Garrus I need you to use the heaviest weapon you have." Shepard said. "If this thing was sent by Harbinger, it's likely gonna target me so that gives you to a change to get some good shots in. Stay in cover. We've made it this far without getting too seriously injured and I want it to stay that way. When I can, I'll hit it with the Particle Beam I picked up. Whatever you do, stay as far away from it as you can. I'm pretty sure it has some type of attack that triggers when you get too close and I don't wanna see it. Are we clear?"
"Yes Shepard." Garrus said. "Oh, and Shepard? Try not to get yourself too banged up. I prefer you come back to the Normandy in one piece."
"No need to worry Garrus," Shepard said with a small smile and laugh. "That's at the top of the list of my priorities right now. Let's take this damn thing down so we can get off this planet."
Just as she suspected, the Pretorian (as she later learned it was called) seemed to target only her with its beam. She used herself as bait, dodging quickly from cover to cover, while Garrus and Jacob threw as much firepower as they could at it. In between particle beam shots, Shepard hit it with her own heavy weapon. Halfway through the fight, EDI got the defense towers online and started picking away at the Collector ship. The fight as long and hard but they managed to take it down in the end. Once the Collectors started taking damage, they left taking at least half of the colony with them.
"NO! Don't let them get away!" Delan screamed at the retreating ship as he ran out from the garage.
"I'm sorry but there's nothing more I can do." Shepard said. The adrenaline rush of battle was wearing off and she could feel the fears and doubts creeping up on her again.
"You saved half the colony Shepard. That's more than anyone could've hoped for." Jacob said, stepping up to stand beside her.
"Shepard? Wait, I know that name. Aren't you some big Alliance hero?" Delan said. If he said anything after that, Shepard didn't hear it. She saw movement behind some of the crates near Delan and then the one person she'd been hoping to see the whole time stepped into view.
Ashley Williams. She was just as beautiful as Shepard remembered. The years had definitely taken their toll on her though. Ashley looked like a woman that had been hell and back and had returned with more than a few demons.
"Commander Esperanza Shepard. Captain of the Normandy. First human Spectre. Savior of the Citadel." Ashley rattled off Shepard's titles and accomplishments to Delan while never breaking eye contact with her. "You're in the presence of a God Delan; back from the dead."
"All the good people we lost and you get left behind? Screw this. I'm done with you Alliance types." Delan said before walking off, leaving Ashley alone with Shepard and her ground team.
"I thought you were dead Esperanza. We all did." Ashley walked up and pulled Shepard in for a hug. For the first time since waking up, she felt like she was home.
"It's been too long Ash. How have you been?" Shepard said with a sad smile.
"That's it? You show up after two years and act like nothing's happened?" Ashley said angrily. It was like a switch flipped inside her and all of the anger, resentment, and pain she felt for those two years Shepard was gone came rushing out. "We had something, something real. I loved you! I thought you were dead. How could you put me through that? Why didn't you contact me? Why didn't you let me know you were alive?"
"I'm sorry Ash but what do you want me to say? I was dead. I spent those two years on an operating table, part science experiment, part jigsaw puzzle for Cerberus. I regained consciousness once and only for a matter of seconds." Shepard said. She was truly hurt by Ashley's accusations. How could she truly believe she'd just up and leave and not try to contact her?
"Well why not now? Why not contact me after you woke up?" Ashley said.
"I tried! I asked Anderson where you were as soon as I got to the Citadel but he told me it was 'classified'. What was I supposed to do?" Shepard said. She could feel the tears threatening and tried her hardest to keep them from falling. "It's obvious you've moved on. Why reopen old wounds?"
"Huh. I've moved on but here you are pulling me back. And now we have reports of you with Cerberus. The group we tried our hardest to destroy." Ashley said as she looked at the Cerberus insignia on Jacob's armor.
"Reports? You mean you knew?" Jacob said.
"Alliance intel said Cerberus could be behind our missing colonies. We got a tip that this one could be the next to get hit. I went to Anderson and he wouldn't talk but there were rumors you weren't dead. Worse, that you were working for the enemy." Ashley said accusingly.
"Our colonies are disappearing and Cerberus is the only one doing something about it. You better believe I'm gonna use their money and resources to save lives." Shepard replied angrily. She wasn't about to let anyone question her motives or loyalty.
"Bullshit Shepard. I know what Cerberus is like. They talk a big game about 'putting humans first' but at what cost? I wanted to believe you were alive, I just didn't expect… this." Ashley said just as angrily. "You betrayed the Alliance, Anderson, your mother! You betrayed me, Shepard."
"How dare you?! You know me Ashley! You know damn well I'd only do this for a damn good reason and the last time I checked, the ship that just took off with half of this fucking colony is a good fucking reason! The Collectors and the Reapers are behind this, not Cerberus and definitely not me." Shepard was livid. She understood confusion and even hurt but to call her a traitor to the Alliance and her mother? That was a low blow. Something she didn't know if she could easily forgive.
"I want to believe you Shepard, God knows I do but I don't trust Cerberus. It worries me that you do." Ashley's voice had lowered but the hurt, anger, and mistrust were still there. "How do you know they're not behind it? What makes you so sure?"
"You're so focused on Cerberus you can't see the truth." Jacob said.
"Damnit Ashley! You think we weren't there too?! You think we don't know what Cerberus is capable of? We don't work for them, we work for Shepard. We're trying to save these people!" Garrus interjected. He'd had enough of Ashley's baseless accusations and could see how bad they were hurting Shepard.
"So you're not gonna listen to me then?" Shepard said sadly. She knew whatever she and Ashley had in the past was long gone now.
"No. You may feel like you owe Cerberus something Shepard but I know where my loyalties lie. I'm an Alliance soldier to the core. I'm reporting back to the Citadel. We'll see if they believe your story." With that, Ashley turned and left. Shepard wanted to do something, anything but just stand there but she couldn't. She just stood there staring at the space where Ashley stood only seconds ago in shock. She was brought out of her trance by a hand on her shoulder and a voice in her ear.
"Shepard, we need to leave." Jacob said softly. Once again, Shepard could have sworn in that moment he knew exactly what she was feeling.
"Joker. Send the shuttle to pick us up. I've had enough of this colony." Shepard said, her voice cracking with emotion. A few short minutes later they were on the shuttle and gone for good.