Was I scared of him?
At first, I was. A hitman? Who wouldn't be scared of that?
But at the same time, I trusted him. I guess you could call that unhealthy, trusting someone while being scared of them, like falling in love with your captors or something.
I don't think it was because I was already living in fear, of Alfred and of the transition, of the future.
I think it was because I had nothing left to lose.