Chapter 13

Adrienne Kiriakis gasped at the square emerald, translucent green set on a white-gold band; diamond baguettes on each corner glittering on Carly's slim finger.

'Tony says the colour reminds him of my eyes, that's why he picked out an emerald.' Carly smiled faintly as Adrienne took her hand for a closer look. 'One minute we were having dinner at his uncle's restaurant then out of nowhere he pops the question.'

Adrienne eyed her friend warily. 'But the real question is; do you actually want this marriage? I'm sorry for asking this….'

'No, it's a good question; after all I once married as a means of escape. But this isn't an escape, not this time.I love Tony and I really want to be with him.'

'I believe that. But I also know you Carly,' Adrienne squeezed her hand. 'It's not the same, is it?'

Carly shook her head after a few minutes of silence. 'No, it's not. And you're right; that kind of love can never go away. Bo…' she swallowed, 'is my great love but we aren't meant to be 's a good man; very sweet and kind and we understand each other, and he makes me happy. When I'm with him, part of the pain goes away.'

'Carly, I love you; so I want you to be sure about this. It won't be much of a marriage if you both end up miserable.' Adrienne insisted.

'I am sure. Very sure.' Carly said firmly. 'Tony isn't Bo, but he isn't Lawrence or Victor either. I'm not the runner up for his love or a trophy. And who knows, in time I might end up loving him exactly like I loved Bo. That's the beauty of time; it heals.'

Love, not loved, Adrienne silently corrected. Carly badly wanted to shed off the burden of loving Bo and forget him, going as far as marrying another man. For the first time, she found herself giving Bo the benefit of the doubt, suppose he was telling the truth the day he went to see Carly? But she changed her mind swiftly; he only went to her after seeing her with Tony, it was nothing but jealousy. Carly deserved a happy ending. And if she actually wanted to be with Tony, so be it.

With that in mind, she smiled at Carly. 'Then, I hope you'll both be very happy. When's the wedding?'

'Oh, we haven't fixed a date yet. But you'll be the first to know of course.' Carly smiled back; very glad she had Adrienne's support. 'And I want you and Brady there when Tony and I take our vows.'

'Of course we're going to be there!' Adrienne hugged her. 'So happy for you both! When's Tony coming back to town?'

'In two weeks, after he comes back from a business trip.'

'Great; we'll have a big dinner together to celebrate! And Frankie?'

'Mel and I stopped at D.C on the way home. He was thrilled to finally meet her and about this; I hope he'll stop feeling so bitter about the family now.'

'If he's still mad at them, he has good reason to! Stop thinking about them, you don't owe them anything; neither does he.' Adrienne snapped impatiently. 'They aren't your family anymore, they made that pretty clear. Especially Kayla.'

'Don't remind me.' Carly muttered, painfully thinking of her last encounter with Bo's sister; she'd been so hateful that Carly had barely recognized her. Time healed but it was also cruel; it changed people and relationships. And loves. She looked down at the square emerald glittering up at her, trying not to remember the solitaire diamond Bo had slipped on her finger so long ago.

It's in the past, she told herself again. He's erased you. You're no longer a part of each other's lives.

'You're right again, old friend.' She turned to Adrienne. 'And I'm going to keep moving forward.'

'That's the spirit. And I'm really proud of you. Not everyone has the guts to do just that.' Adrienne hugged her again.

::::::::::::::::::::

Carly braced herself to tell Daniel and Jennifer about her engagement but on getting to the hospital she was told that Daniel was performing a major surgery and Jennifer was not in her office. Some of her resentment towards Jennifer was gone and Carly wanted to make amends. She truly didn't see her old classmate as an enemy but the situation had been far too awkward. Maybe now they could start over in the light of things.

Closing Jennifer's door behind her she found herself facing Hope's cold stare. Instantly Carly stiffened, ready for battle.

'Jennifer's not here.'

'I came to see you. To ask you again to stay away from my husband.'

'Oh you just love calling Bo your husband, that title proudly rolls off your tongue, doesn't it?' Carly said, contemptuously. 'Considering he's only your husband when it's convenient for you, when you aren't emasculating him...If you put your fingers on me again,' she added as she saw the other woman's hand balling into a fist.

'Don't you think you've caused enough trouble already?' Hope asked angrily. 'You and Billie are both the same; you're so obsessed with Bo that you think you can take me on... you think wrong, Carly Manning.

'Don't you dare associate me with her.' Carly's voice was dangerous. 'I'm nothing like Billie Reed and I'm nothing like you; selfish and immature, always relying on everyone to protect her! I actually blamed myself for what you did to Bo and to Justin and Brady but now I'm starting to wonder what really lead you to do it. God knows what really lies behind that mask you wear, Hope Brady.'

Hope raised her chin. 'I've made my peace with Bo, Carly. No matter what, we'll always be together, you know why; because we love each other. Your time with him is over, long over and don't you forget it.'

'Now that you've said your piece; we're not having this conversation again.'

'I'm not done.' Hope said in a rush as Carly made to walk past her. 'It may interest you to know this; Bo and I are expecting another baby.'

Carly's chest felt like it was suddenly being hit with a hammer. But one of the things she practised very well wasstoicism so there was no emotion on her face at Hope's announcement, only in her heart.

Facing Hope squarely, she said coolly, 'Congratulations. Naturally, your marriage's bound to be stronger now.'

'Much stronger.' Hope's voice was equally cool. 'So you stop leading Bo on and let him concentrate fully on his family. Understood?'

Carly longed to slap her. 'Understood.' She said stiffly. 'Congratulations again.'

Hope's expression was smug as she turned away and walked to the elevators, her message having hit home. Carly waited for the doors to close before sinking into the nearest chair, trying to quell the sob rising up her throat as she gripped her stomach with her hands. Her empty womb mocked her; Hope's given Bo three children, another one on the way… Billie gave Bo his first daughter, and you, nothing! NOTHING!

Carly rocked herself, bowing her head in grief. Why God, why? She wept. Why this?

Maxine and another nurse hurried to her. 'Dr. Manning, are you alright? What's happened?' Maxine asked anxiously.

Carly could only cry heartbrokenly. Enfolding her in her arms, Maxine turned to the young nurse with her. 'Go find Melanie.'

In a few minutes, Melanie was hugging her mother tight, soothing her as she led her to the privacy of her office. 'What happened?' She asked distressed. 'Tell me Mum, I'll put it right.'

Carly pressed a hand to her eyes. 'Hope… she… she…'

'WHAT did she do to you?' Melanie asked fiercely. 'What did she do this time?'

Bitterness and pain ran through Carly. Bo had come here asking for another chance, all the while he and Hope were making love, making another child… bastard!

'She's pregnant.' She whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks. 'Mel, she's pregnant.'

'Did she tell you that?' Melanie asked, amazed. 'That's what she came to tell you?'

Carly bowed her head.

'THAT BITCH!' Melanie shouted. 'Who the hell does she think she is coming here to rub your face with…'

'She did it to warn me off, to remind me they'll always be a family.' Carly's eyes were red from weeping. 'I already knew that but this, this… I lost my baby and she gets another…' she sobbed.

Melanie held her close; upset that Carly was unhappy again, she'd been doing so well the past months. Damn you, Hope Brady! She thought savagely.

'It's okay Mum, it's going to be alright. Think of what you're soon going to have, a wonderful husband… a whole new life.' She soothed, stroking her hair. 'To hell with Hope… and Bo too. Don't allow them to ruin your life, Mum. They aren't worth it.'

Carly pulled away after a while, wiping her eyes with a hanky. 'I need some air.' She got up, taking her purse from the table.

'Wait for me, I'll go change…'

'No, sweetie,' Carly patted Melanie's cheek. 'I need to be alone for a while. I'll be fine.'

Carly's heart was heavy as she got outside, wondering whether or not to go down to The Cheating Heart and unburden herself to Adrienne. Instead she walked, deep in thought; not noticing Vivian's henchman was following her yet again.

She continued walking, past the Pub, past several houses until she was standing in front of the church. Once upon a time she'd contemplated joining a convent until she'd discovered she was carrying Nicholas. When she'd lost Bo's child she'd avoided the church as she felt the miscarriage was her fault, she still did despite Adrienne and Melanie's assurances. If she made her peace with God… maybe the pain wouldn't be so excruciating like it was right now, thanks to Hope's cruel declaration. Taking a deep breath, she entered the church and stepped into the nearest confessional, crossing herself after sitting down.

'Bless me Father for I have sinned…' she said in a shaking voice. 'It's been several months since my last confession.'

'Well my child?' the deep voice of the priest asked.

Carly sighed, tears rolling down her cheeks again. 'I killed my unborn child.'