Chapter Seven: Ramifications
The mist had seemingly become thicker and Julia swore she saw shapes taking form only to have nothing manifest from the swirling air. Once or twice there was movement – it had to be something and not her imagination! - in the vacant windows and storefronts they passed by. Wanting to mention these things to the others Julia deemed it both a waste of time and a great way to look like a scared little girl. If there was one thing she didn't like it was coming off as weak or needy, especially in front of Victor.
As they progressed towards the apartment southeast of the park there was a faint sound in the distance that grew louder with each step. Cautiously Victor slowed their pace and it was soon evident the sound was a type of motor. It did not have the whine of a small stroke type but the rumble of a full sized vehicle and a large one at that. Julia immediately thought of that one movie with the killer car that come to life but quickly banished the idea. This was real life wasn't it?
Taking a position on the rough brick edge of a building Victor halted their procession to look around for the source of the auditory disturbance. It couldn't have been more than two blocks away at this point but the mist was so thick that it still could not be seen. "Sounds like an old muscle car." Chuck said. Victor turned and furrowed his brow at the Canadian.
"What? My dad's a huge car buff. Oh..." he trailed off.
"What is it?" Victor asked worriedly, turning his attention back to the path ahead.
"Nothing it's just...I haven't seen my folks in years. I should go visit them if we get out of here. I'm sorry, I'm sure you guys talk to your parents all the time." Chuck rambled. Julia moved into Chuck's line of sight and made a throat cutting motion as quickly as she could. Chuck's eyes widen slightly and Victor remained quiet. One of the defining moments of his life had been his mother's death; Chuck was bringing up the worst subject he possibly could.
"I think it's coming from this way." Victor said without turning around and moved off without them. Hanging back Julia crossed her arms and frowned at Chuck.
"You forgot already didn't you?" she asked and was quite cross.
"Damn. Shit. I'm sorry I said anything." Chuck said miserably. "I didn't offend you too did I?"
"I'm okay. I never knew my parents. Had great foster parents and a stable life. I'm at peace with it but Victor...well it's best just to not bring it up again okay? C'mon, we can't let him get too far ahead."
They started walking after the knight and Chuck took a deep breath. "I always do this." he lamented. "I always say the wrong thing to people I try to get to like me. I bet he hates my guts now."
"Just try not to be so chatty. And don't ever mention mayo around him. Drives him crazy?"
"Mayo like mayonnaise?"
"Yeah. I wouldn't mention it."
Chuck managed a feeble laugh but Julia wasn't making a joke. Ahead of them Victor was waiting by the corner of the next block. The engine sound was loud now and very close. "It's an old car alright." he whispered loudly as necessary to hear as they came up.
"Anyone in it?" Julia asked. Victor merely shrugged and nodded in that direction. Edging herself around the building she saw a red muscle car without wheels parked along the sidewalk some thirty feet away. Silently grateful for the absence of the killer car option she studied the soot covered windows for signs of life. The car seemed to just be humming to itself with no other indication it was being operated.
Backing off she asked, "Check it out?"
"Might be a trap?" Victor speculated.
"Yeah but...if it's still on that means there's gas in the tank right? That might come in handy." Julia thought.
"How?"
"I don't know, powering stuff, molotov cocktails."
"Molotov cocktails." Victor said flatly. "Really?"
"I'll go." Chuck volunteered. "Just cover me."
"Cover you? Cover you with what?"
"Just cover me dammit!" he repeated and crept around the corner. Julia threw her hands up and Victor gave the slightest of smirks. Regardless of her annoyance the at the both of them she followed Chuck at a reasonable distance and did so very quietly. Slipping her pistol into her hand she kept it pointed low at the ground as she heard Victor slip his blade out from its sheathe.
Dropping down on his hands Chuck checked under the car before getting too close to it. Creeping towards the front passenger door he looked over his shoulder to make sure his back up wasn't too far away. With a nod from Julia he crouched low and taking it step by step Chuck fairly crawled up to the glossy metal handle. Pausing when he was an arm's length away he slowly reached out to open the door.
The engine suddenly sputtered and died as he was only inches away from making contact. Jumping back abruptly Chuck skidded back on his hands and rear end frantically. Julia tensed up in her whole upper body and trained her gun on the door to shoot anything that came out but nothing did. Getting his feet back under him Chuck watched the car for a few moments before shaking out his jitters. Glancing at the other humans again to reassure himself he worked his way back up to the now placid car. Seizing the handle he flung open the door and rolled out of the way.
Thick clouds of noxious smoke came pouring out of the cabin. Even from where she was standing she could smell the nauseating odor of carbon monoxide dispersing into the air. Scrambling to his feet Chuck made a confused face when the smoke cleared out. Without taking his eyes off what was inside he waved them to come closer. There didn't seem to be any imminent danger so she joined him and ducked down to see inside.
Sitting in the driver's seat and belted in tight was an unclothed male mannequin. Its head had been tilted back as if it was sleeping in the seat. The hands had been sprawled out on its lap and a solitary key was in the steering column.
"Goddamn mannequins." she cursed. This was a minor occurrence by all accounts; they'd all no doubt been through worse. The part that truly troubled her was that it was beginning already. The mannequin was just the overture, the tip of the iceberg. Gone was her optimism that perhaps things had changed here. As always the town had just made sure they were deep enough inside that getting out would be no easy task.
"So much for gas. Tank'll be bone dry." Chuck concluded.
Victor came over to peer into the cabin and did his trademark reaction of not reacting at all. "It should only be a few more blocks this way. Let's try to avoid any more incidents until we get to our destination." he suggested with the concern of a government official. Thoroughly spooked Julia nevertheless holstered her gun and they fell back in line behind Victor as they continued down the sidewalk. Mere seconds had passed until Julia was unnerved to hear a car door open and frantic steps broke the silence as they beat down the street in the opposite direction. She froze and Victor did the same in front of her.
She'd assumed Chuck was walking behind her the whole time but it seemed he'd lingered by the car. To her complete surprise he was right behind her with his mouth hanging open in shock. A chill ran down her spine as all three of them turned back to the car which was still mostly visible through the mist. The front driver side door was open despite it being shut just moments ago.
"Okay, I'm trying not to freak out here." Chuck whispered. "But I'm pretty sure I didn't open both of those doors."
"We should keep moving." Victor urged.
Julia's heart was beating fast but she couldn't just keep walking. If there wasn't a plastic, unmoving person in the driver's seat that definitely did not get up out of its position by itself then she would have trouble turning her back to the car. She really wanted to believe that it was still sitting there like it should be.
"One of you go check it out." she whispered.
"Are you nucking futs?" Chuck hissed. "I already did it once and I don't even have a weapon!"
"I have to find out...Vic will you go look?"
"Can we go afterward?" he pleaded.
"Yes!"
Breaking away from where they huddled like mice Victor calmly strode to the open door, ducked his head down and scanned the interior before coming back.
"Well?" she asked, not entirely wanting to hear the answer but needing to.
"Car's empty, mannequin's gone. Let's get going." he replied casually.
"Oh frig..."
"Sweet Zeus..."
"What wrong with you two? We weren't attacked. That's a good thing."
"Maybe you don't mind but I'm pretty freaking freaked out. I had nightmares about dolls coming to life when I was little." Julia shuddered.
"Can we just go before it comes back?" Chuck implored insistently.
Hurrying along behind Victor she was also in no mood to stay in the area. Diving back into the mist fearlessly Victor led them around the vacant streets once more. It was so hushed it felt like a dream though it was quickly becoming an unpleasant one. If only the area would stay quiet and peaceful like it was Silent Hill wouldn't be so bad.
They stopped in front of a building that was certainly one of the older structures in the area. Built at least thirty years ago the white paint on it had been fading and peeling for at least a third of that. The lack of human activity in the town even when inhabited had merely accelerated its rapid decline. A low brick wall attempted to encircle the overgrown front lawn but it too had long since seen better days.
"Here we are." Victor announced. He brought them up a stone walk way to the front door which was curiously locked. That didn't seem to be much of a problem for Victor as he got a running start and jumped bodily into the aged wood. It cracked loudly but held until he convinced it otherwise with a few heavy kicks to the locking mechanism. With the last kick the door swung in violently along with bits of wood and dust.
"Couldn't we have just broken a window or something?" Chuck proposed. "That seemed unnecessary."
Victor shrugged and trampled over what was left of the door to get in. Cautiously following Julia noticed that there would be little help from the outside in terms of visibility. A large staircase invited them upward into the darkness while Victor scanned the bottom floor with what little light they had.
"Numbers start at one and two, we'd better head up." he said and she wasn't happy about it. There was too much shadow here, too many places for things to hide. Unenthusiastically she went with him to the second floor and was barely able to see the steps as they moved. The landing on the next floor held no surprises but it did have some murky light coming from above. The stairs were stacked on each other so the next floors' flight was directly above them and blocked a majority of the light coming in. It still filtered down the empty space in the center and gave them a little bit of visual clarity.. Dusty rails guided them to the source of the light at the top floor which turned out to be a pair of giant windows that ran to the ceiling. Once upon a time this might have been a cute little place to live.
There were more darkened halls and rooms on each floor but Victor passed them by. Circling around to the last flight he led them up to a T intersection. Both right and left ended in darkened corners but light seemed to be coming from farther down. He went left and they were briefly surrounded by gloom until fully coming into the hallway. At the end was another window that somewhat lit up the long stretch of carpet. The apartment doors were directly across from each other in pairs all the way to that window at the end of the building.
"I hate it when they do that." Chuck blurted out.
"Do what?"
"That thing with the doors. Makes the whole place look like a hive or something."
"I don't know, I like it like this." she said. "Easier to find your way around."
They started walking down the hall and luckily they'd started at the right spot just at apartment 39. "Should be just down here." Victor deduced.
"Finally." she said somewhat relieved. "Glad we're almost there."
"Glad we never ran into anything the whole way here." Victor agreed.
"Vic!"
"What? Nothing happened did it? It's just a silly superstition. I think I'd know Jewel."
The white battering ram exploded through the door and hit Victor in the shoulder he'd used to break into the building. It kept going even after lifting him off the ground and smashed him through the adjacent door in a violent collision. Having been no more than two steps behind him Julia's brain struggled to form words as she stared at the thick, slimy, white cylinder of flesh in front of her. Almost two feet in diameter the it had to be much longer than the five feet in between each door it currently had punched two holes through. The slimy mass sat there a moment as if studying her before pulling back into the ruined door it had so destructively appeared from.
Standing there Julia contemplated what would be her best move at that particular junction as her legs didn't seem to want to go anywhere. A hand gripped her shoulder and someone yanked her nearly off her feet just before a second crater opened in the wall where she had been standing. That same white column blasted through the solid wood like it was paper and slammed into the other side. Without that timely pull there was a good chance she would have been on the wrong end of that mighty blow.
"Run!" Chuck yelled at her as he made a hasty retreat.
"Victor!" she shouted back but in her mind it was supposed to have been, 'Wait, we have to make sure Victor is okay before proceeding.'
"He'll be okay if it follows us!" Chuck explained and wasted no more breath. Whatever was on the other side of the wall slammed into it again and easily charged through weakened hallway. Skidding forward by its own frightening momentum the beast only stopped when it crashed into the other side of wall. Leaving a statue sized hole behind it the creature was a hulking, smooth thing that barely managed to be contained by the ceiling. Its arms were the battering rams she'd recently become acquainted with that ran from an eight foot shoulder all the way to the floor. They started out like normal arms but thickened dramatically at the ends until they were more like bulbous, fleshy clubs. It gaped at her with freakish lips on the end of a trunk like neck missing the head. It seemed like it was wearing a mottled skirt but she did not stick around to get a good look. Julia turned to run and the creature bellowed a deep, unearthly scream that rattled the door frames around her.
Fully engaged in flight mode she felt the miniiture earthquakes in the old floor from the creature staggering after her. Coming back to the staircase she got a glimpse of Chuck before he bounded down the steps to the second floor. "Guuaaaah!" he shrieked from below her in a mixture of fear and surprise. Moving down the steps as fast as she safely could she barely comprehended that they were shaking as well. Stopping a few precious moments to listen Julia blocked out the noise from the top floor. There was definitely an entirely separate cacophony coming from the lower floors. Julia realized with shock that there was another one of the behemoths coming up as the first one forced them down.
Hurling herself down the stairs she nearly skidded into Chuck fighting with a human sized but still blank featured monster. One of its hands ended in a rusted blade and he was desperately trying to get control of it. The sight was like some kind of bizarre grafting procedure gone horridly wrong. It was as if someone had simply jammed the large piece of metal into the unwilling skin.
Adding her weight to his Julia helped throw the creature to the dusty carpet. Pinning down the creature's bicep, the only part of its left arm that wasn't metal, she gave Chuck the chance to do same. Pulling out her automatic Julia stuck the barrel in the creature's non-face and blew off the top of its skull. Warm blood sprayed her face and the creature merely jerked its limbs faintly in death.
Breathing hard she stood up when the monster was clearly dead. Upright and staring at the body Chuck seemed to be oblivious to this and lost in another world. Around them the behemoths were still closing in and they didn't have much time until they had to deal with both of them at once. Julia holstered her gun but knew that she would desperately need it in the next few minutes.
"I thought I'd be ready." he said absently. "I'm not. I've been away too long. Too many meds, too soft, too many hours lost watching MacGyver reruns."
Unfortunately Julia knew that tone all too well. It was borderline, barely contained hysteria and she'd become very familiar with it since first coming here. It was a mental problem that needed to be checked and fast. Not sure exactly what to do she did what people do in the movies. Cocking her arm back she leaned forward and slapped the taste out of his mouth with a hard palm to the cheek.
Turning his head in complete surprise he stared at her with wide eyes and an open jaw. Getting in his face and looking him in the eye she said, "Pull yourself the fuck together! You can have a breakdown later! Right now we gotta move. There's still two of them and I need your help. Victor needs our help. Get it?"
Rubbing the quickly forming red hand print on his face Chuck said, "You're right. We've gone through too much to fail now."
"That's the spirit." she said and something then caught her ear that wasn't a behemoth and certainly wasn't a person. It was a bubbling, gurgling sound and was soon accompanied by a tar smell that overpowered the coppery blood stench around them. It seemed to be coming from two different places at once which meant to her multiple assailants.
"Is that..." Chuck breathed.
"Yeah. Stay here and warn me if one of those things gets too close. I'll take care of this, okay?"
"Okay..."
"Good. Can you handle this? You ready?" she asked.
"Yeah. I'm ready." he said, trying to bolster his courage.
Hurrying away from the landing where the hall turned left towards the rows of apartments she prayed that the floor layout was the same as above and luckily it was. The monster lurching towards her was casting a shadow on the wall she could easily see without turning the corner to face it. Behind her the sound of flesh and ligaments being ripped apart reached her ears and she had to take a quick glance back. Chuck was standing over the monster they had already killed but she couldn't see what he was doing and didn't have the luxury of finding out.
Sliding up to the corner she peeked around it ever so slowly. It was exactly as she had thought it was going to be. Coming towards her on unsteady feet was a faceless wretch with its arms fused into its body. In the center of its chest churned an acidic black substance that smelled strongly of burning tires. Like most of its kind it was slow and dim witted but capable of grievous harm. All it took was connecting with a stream of that fluid and she would have a vicious burns all over her body. In order to avoid that she'd have to draw an attack that wouldn't end with her covered in pitch.
Attempting to get its attention she whipped her arm out in front of its path in a fast half circle. It staggered closer and let out a muffled moan but did not attack. Trying again produced no result but she could hear it mere feet away. Forcing herself to slow down the motion she slowly repeated the half circle and was almost caught by an explosive burst of the black tar. It hit the wall barely five feet from her and promptly began to eat away at it.
Tearing around the corner she saw the foul smelling thing leaning back as if preparing another volley. There was plenty of open space on either side of it and she dove for safety. It fired again but too late to harm her and she scampered behind it while the acrid smell of burning wood and rubber filled the air. Putting her arm around its neck she kicked out its left leg and planted her knee behind it. This rendered it her hostage and under her control as she pulled out her pistol.
Halting as she held the gun to its temple the wall burning ahead of her suddenly inspired something that he hadn't thought of before. Putting the pistol away she dragged the monster along as it made gurgling sounds and struggled but with only one leg it could do little more than that. Julia brought it back the way they had come as fast as she force it to hobble and rounded to corner to see her companion in a jam. At the bottom of the stairs Chuck was trying to fend off the second battering ram that was doing its best to climb steps clearly not designed for it. Waving some kind of sword the escaped mental patient didn't seem to be doing much good and she shrugged off the question as to where he had gotten a weapon in such a short amount of time.
"Out of the way!" she yelled and Chuck looked back to see her and her new friend. Astounded by what he saw Chuck nevertheless hurried back up the stairs away from the raging behemoth . It wasn't making good progress and was simply smashing its huge arms into the steps instead of using them as intended to climb towards them. Bringing her churning buddy to bear Julia pointed it as best she could at its oncoming kin. The struggling climber managed to gain another few feet when Julia decided that waiting for something to happen probably wasn't the best idea.
Getting one leg solidly down she used the other to knee her captive hard in the spine. Nothing happened so she did it again for good measure and this time it discharged a frothing burst from its chest downward at the stairs. The noxious tar splattered on the battering ram's white skin like burning paint on a white canvas. It roared frightfully as the substance burned into it but Julia did not let up and ruthlessly drove her knee the back of her new tar cannon. Her unwilling weapon twisted and its next shot went unexpectedly upward and instead decorated the ceiling above her intended target.
Cursing at the waste of a shot Julia involuntarily ducked at the thundering tremor that came from almost directly above her. It took her a moment to realize the first battering ram was trying to descend the stairs with as much grace as the second one. Pointing her creature's torso upward she asked it in no uncertain terms to continue spraying that spot by way of repeated knees to the spine. The spitter reluctantly agreed and applied another coat to the already corroding wood above.
A crashing step from above proved to be almost too much for the old staircase and it creaked loudly with the weight of the heavy creature. The lower battering ram almost comically turned its still burning mouth trunk upward at the sound before its fellow behemoth took another step and burst through the ceiling in an avalanche of splintered wood. The mass landed on top of the second monster and together they rent a destructive path to the bottom of the stairwell. Plowing through the feeble stairs like a great, slimy cannonball the behemoths produced a deafening reverberation when they came to a stop at the bottom of the ruined stairwell. Bits of lumber continued to fall even after the dust began to settle from all around them.
Finally releasing her prisoner Julia gave it a hearty kick into the new ventilation system she'd just installed. It made no sound as it fell over the side and landed badly below. Joining her at the top the stairs Chuck surveyed the damage. Leaning as far as he dared he said, "One of the big ones is still moving."
Pulling out her pistol Chuck held up his hand. "I got this one." he said as he showed her a bloody, rusty blade that looked very familiar. He headed away to look for a different way down but turned back for a moment. "That was...pretty awesome." he gushed.
"Was it?" Julia asked. At the moment she was genuinely unable to admire her own handiwork. There was no glory or joy in this for her. It was just survival.
Hefting the rusty blade Chuck excused himself and disappeared down the hallway. She felt like she had earned a break when she realized that Victor was still upstairs somewhere and possibly in danger. Nearly tripping over the body of the first monster they'd dispatched she saw where the sword like object had come from. Chuck had simply ripped it out of the arm it had been attached to. Mentally filing this macabre incident for later disgust she took care to step over both the armless monster went the direction Chuck had gone. Jogging after him she found a smaller stairwell at the rear of the building. Speeding her way up to the third floor she came out on the right hallway and zipped past the apartments to get back to the landing they had originally came up.
Making a right into the hallway where number 45 was she stopped short when she saw a figure back lit by the window at the end. Putting a hand on her gun she realized that it was Victor stumbling towards her. "Vic!"
He was dazed and regarded her almost in confusion. Rushing to his side she helped him sit back down on the floor and lean against the wall. "Are you okay sweetness?" she asked worriedly.
Blinking a couple of times as if this was a strange question Victor groggily asked, "What just happened?"
Concerned she pushed his head down and felt for bruising or blood. "Are you dizzy?" she asked.
"No." he answered calmly. "Your boobs are in my face."
"Alright, well, suffer through that for me for a bit." she said without stopping. Satisfied that he had not taken permanent damage she leaned back and said, "Doesn't seem like you have any head trauma. I think you just got knocked the hell out."
"And...how did that happen?"
"A really big monster with a couch for an arm punched you through the door."
"Oh. That actually makes a lot of sense." Victor said. His brow furrowed for a moment and he added, "Wait did I miss something else? How did one of those ridiculously loud things sneak up on me?"
Julia opened her mouth to answer but no reason came to mind. Now that she thought on it there was no warning or sound at all. It wasn't like the monsters of Silent Hill to plan such a devastating sneak attack. "You know...I haven't the foggiest. We were just walking and then boom! it came out the wall to ruin your day."
"That's...very strange isn't it?"
"Yeah, actually it kind of is."
"Are you okay?"
"My arm feels like one giant bruise but I'll be fine. Where's Chuck?"
On cue they heard steps coming towards them and Julia only relaxed when the Canadian came around the corner. "Looks safe. They're all taken care of." he reported. "Is he okay?"
"Yeah, he'll be fine."
"Eh guy, you got knocked the fuck out." Chuck said.
"Nice to see you too." Victor said dryly. "What happened to your face?"
Chuck glared at Julia and said, "I don't know. What did happen to my face?'
"He was in need of some borrowed courage and I only had some in my hand." Julia shrugged. "You're welcome, by the way."
"If we're here chatting incessantly I take it we're in the clear?" Victor asked.
"Should be."
"Then help me up."
Taking one arm the other two lifted Victor back to his feet. Leaning heavily on Julia he eyed the blade in Chuck's hand and wondered, "Where'd you get that weapon?"
"One of the monsters had it attached to its arm." Julia explained.
"I disarmed him." Chuck said with a straight face.
"Oh. Ha. Very funny."
"A pun."
Chuck looked perplexed. "Wait what? I don't get it."
This actually made Julia laugh for real and she waved him off. "Never mind. What do we do now?"
"What we came here to do. Check out the apartment."
Limping down the hallway just three apartments from where they were Victor stopped to fumble for the key. Fitting it into the lock he turned it one way and the other before turning back to them. "It isn't locked." he announced anticlimactically.
"What? What was the key for then?"
"Um...maybe the front door you bashed in?" Chuck offered.
"Well at any rate we had better head in." Victor said and deftly managed to change the subject. "You're the one with the blade Chuck Taylor. Go on."
Pushing open the door with one hand Chuck brought up the still slick weapon. It gave off that metallic blood smell but it was coupled with something else unique to the monsters of Silent Hill. There was the faintest hint of something oily or greasy that was certainly there and certainly repulsive.
Past the door was a surprisingly well decorated home with no signs of abnormality. His handling of the weapon was amateur at best but Chuck moved through the apartment with killer intensity. The main living room ahead split off into a small kitchen and two more rooms at either side of the typical couch, table and television set up. Waiting in the middle of the living room Julia watched him open the farthest door which had been hiding a simple bedroom. Its set up was also entirely ordinary with a nightstand and cabinet. The entire place was so plain it could have been used to film a sitcom.
"Nothing here?" she guessed. Victor said nothing but dislodged himself from her shoulder to investigate the second door.
"I think we'd hear something if there were any monsters around." Chuck said while leaning his makeshift sword against the wall.
"No one heard anything when that thing put Victor through a door." she pointed out.
"Hmmm. Right." Chuck agreed.
The door opened to her right and Victor said, "Ah. Here."
Even with his considerable bulk in the way Julia could see as she approached that there was a mountain of boxes in the next room. Filing into the small room she moved out from behind him and saw the full extent of the giant stockpile before her. Divided into sections the first pile was made up of all kinds of camping gear and military MREs stacked almost to the ceiling. Rope, cooking supplies, thermal blankets and even a rolled up tent were stacked neatly together. Next came boxes upon boxes of 9mm, 10mm, .45 and .50 caliber bullets, buckshot and rifle slugs like something out of a gun junkie's dreams. There was even a sling of grenades with harmless the innocuous green orbs fit snugly in the rungs like a Vietnam war flick. Lastly was a row of six handguns on a rack and many more fully loaded clips meticulously arranged. Three shotguns and hunting rifles were at the end of the rack that barely fit with everything else.
Dominating the entire display however was a set of armor, sword and shield. Made out of a greenish tinted metal that didn't seem to reflect any light the shield was leaning against the boxes of ammo and wide enough for almost two people. Ancient styled metal greaves sat next to a helmet that had a flashlight built into the top. It was an eerie replication of the helmet Julia had first seen Victor in and she surmised that this was no coincidence. Sitting next to the sword was a collection of low tech weapons including a pickaxe, shovel and metal fighting gloves that appeared to be made out of silver or something close to it. Rounding out the collection was a green hilted sword wrapped in a haphazardly fashioned black leather scabbard and propped up next to the shield with a note attached.
They sat in stunned silence for a few moments until Chuck cleared his throat from behind them. "Dibs on the shotguns."
"That...is a lot of bullets." was all Julia could think to say.
"You two can have the firearms." Victor said.
"Oooooh! Dis-armed! I get it now." Chuck laughed to himself.
Julia put her palm to her face. She hated puns.