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"SHERLOCK!" Sherlock nearly dropped his blowtorch at Loki's screech, unable to discern whether it was an excited or pain ridden sound. "Sherlock! Sherlock, we need to see this!" Excitement it was then. The detective carefully set his equipment down and kept his blowtorch from burning down the kitchen. Again.

"Loki? Loki, what is it?" He found the Mischief Maker perched in front of Sherlock's laptop on the couch, no doubt using the power of the internet to troll comic con goers. Poor Smauglock was clutched in his arms so tight; it looked as though Loki might pop the unfortunate dragon's head off. The god in question had a mad grin on his face and a light in his eyes that could rival a child ready to pounce on a Christmas gift. It didn't take much more for Sherlock to deduce what his lover was so giddy about. "Let me guess? Hobbit trailer?" Loki nodded excitedly. "Does it meet your expectations then?" Another enthusiastic nod. "Take Mary or John."

"Wait, what?" The giddy seemed to evaporate from Loki's face, as if he was genuinely disappointed by the suggestion. Sherlock couldn't imagine why though. He made it no secret that he wasn't fond of the epic fiction.

"I'm not going with you this time. Take John or Mary. I'm sure they'll enjoy it with you. Or even Molly, she'd probably drool over that blonde elf person."

"A: His name is Legolas and B: it's not as fun without you."

"You know I hate those movies. I cannot possibly be enjoyable company and the last thing I would want to watch is you having a bloody 'fangasm' over a fictional dragon."

"I can't help it if he sounds like you!"

"He sounds nothing like me!"

"Yes he does! And besides it's not like I'm trying to make him-" Loki's ramble dropped in a way that made Sherlock incredibly nervous. The look on the god's face indicated he had a mischief-powered light bulb go off in his mind. "Actually…"

"Loki. No."

"I want to make a dragon."

"No you are not making any dragons."

"You're right. That's far too much energy. Maybe that trader…"

"Loki, where the hell are you planning to keep a dragon?"

"Well here, duh!"

"Loki, we cannot fit a full sized dragon into this tiny flat. Mrs. Hudson would have a field day!" Sherlock was actually fairly certain he was wasting his breath right now. Once Loki set his mind to an idea, no matter how insane or impractical, it took a force of a more powerful god to change his mind. But he had to try to reason with his hyperactive fangod for the sake of 221b and his own sanity. "Beside this whole flat is far too flammable for you to have a dragon."

"Not a full size ignis dragon, of course not! That would be far too impractical. Contrary to popular Midgardian cinema, Sherlove, not all dragons are larger than, oh what do you call that thing, Big Ben? Nor do all dragons breathe fire. They come in as many varieties as mortals do."

"Loki…"

"Perhaps I can contact that trader in Niflehiem…"

"Loki?"

"Or was he in Alfhiem? Where did I contact him last?"

"LOKI!"

"What?! There is no need to shout, my love. I am right here." Sherlock's eyes took an exasperated roll towards the ceiling. He never thought Loki was this thick, even when he was lost in a sea of thought. Then again he sometimes wondered if Loki was the God of Chaos only because of his chaotic thought process.

"Loki. Love. We absolutely cannot have a dragon in our flat. Think of how suspicious that would look on both of us." Loki's thin eyebrows knit together at that, staring at his precious mortal incredulously.

"Sherlock Holmes, you live with a convicted 'insane' god of chaos. In fact you share you bed with him. Your best friend is a retired military veteran who prefers the company of potential psychopaths and his wife was an assassin in another life. I'm more than certain a tiny dragon is not going to affect that very much."

"Fury is already certain I'm going to help you try to take over the world again. We do not need to give him more reason to send in goons." As he said this, Sherlock's phone dinged to let him know he had a message. "Or rather whoever's in charge of your incarceration now." Sherlock was more than happy to answer it as Loki began to deploy his most dangerous weapon. The kicked puppy eyes. "Look, I have to go help Greyson-"

"Greg." The fact that Sherlock attempted to use Lestrade's first name indicated just how much Loki's deathly adorable puppy pout affected the detective. "Please, Sherlock…. Just a little one…." The detective was quick to tug on his coat, refusing to make eye contact with his beloved.

"Loki, I'm fairly certain that dragons would be considered an illegal pet. Now I do really have to leave."

"But Sheeerlooock….."

"Just try to behave!" And with that, Sherlock bolted out, running into the door in his rush to escape the puppy pout. Loki huffed.

"Dear, dear Sherlock. You have yet to learn. I do what I want."

- Burdened with glorious deductions -

Loki couldn't help but beam with pride at his handiwork. He had arranged a little nest on Baker Street's kitchen table out of various blankets, scarves, and heating pads. Nestled in the center of the multicolored mass was a small, ruby colored egg sprinkled with sapphire flecks. The God of Mischief had chosen the egg specifically for its scarlet hue and speckles which likened to both his favorite fictional dragon and his beloved detective's eyes and scarf. Of course, he knew those very same eyes would be burning with fury when he realized Loki had brought the egg here despite his decree. Luckily, they had a few days – or possibly, weeks – to argue about it.

"Loki Laufeyson!" The god growled at Sherlock's use of his full name. The sleuth now stood in doorway beside him, his eyes glued on the dragon egg in shock. "What. Is. That."

"I told you to never use my full name, Sherlock Holmes. Loki only used the wretched name because he had no other choice on Earth. It was apparently needed for various ridiculous reasons. He still loathed the reference to his biological father and refused to answer to it among those he actually trusted.

"And I told you-"

"Not to get a dragon. And I did not. I got a dragon egg." The god smirked as his precious Sherlock smacked a palm to his forehead. For a genius, Sherlock never seemed to learn to pick his words wisely and carefully around Loki. "We need a pet, Sherlove."

"A dragon is not a pet!"

"Of course it is! Or it could be if you gave it a chance!"

"On what planet is a fire-breathing monstrosity ever considered a pet!?" That hit the normally unwavering trickster hard in the gut. He was well aware that dragons were not exactly considered traditional pets on Midgard. Especially since most people did not believe they had existed until recently. But monstrosities? He was convinced that humans loved dragons…

"It… it won't… breathe fire…" But the exasperated anger on Sherlock's face spoke volumes. Oh, pull yourself together, you fool! You are a god! Not some sniveling mortal! "Ahem. You were right about one thing. Fire would be extremely impractical." Hopefully, Loki had been successful in hiding how the m-word had affected him. Sherlock flopped into the nearest chair, rubbing his eyes. The god felt his heart drop. "Surely, they are not the monsters you think…?"

"Monsters? What? Oh! No!" The detective finally figured out what he had done. Loki was well aware Sherlock missed social cues all the time, so he couldn't hold his own personal bias towards the word against his detective. But dragons were such beautiful creatures, how could anyone see them as monsters? Being a monster himself, Loki would happily swear his life on the fact dragons were not. Sherlock sighed. "No, love. Dragons are not monsters. It's just…"

"I… I can take it back…" He didn't really want to give the precious little egg back to the trader. He already grown quite attached to it. However, the fallen prince knew what it was like if one wasn't really wanted in the first place. He wouldn't wish that on anyone. Sherlock looked at Loki then the egg for a long time, clearly considering his options.

"If it doesn't breathe fire, what does it do then?"

"It's actually an ice dragon. It can make very small fireballs as an infant to defend itself. But once matured, it will breathe ice and fire icicles."

"And it will not get very big?"

"No. It will only be about four feet long full grown. I promise." Loki faked a smile. "It would be big enough to ride on your shoulder." If the humor reached Sherlock at all, he didn't show it. The air grew tense and silent as Sherlock studied the egg. Loki was desperate to keep the egg but as much as the god did what he wanted, he also was quite respectful of Sherlock's wishes as well. After a tense pause, Sherlock sighed yet again, but with an amused smile.

"Well… what shall we call our new family member then?" Loki's eyes lit up with excitement and the god couldn't resist pouncing on his mortal beloved, knocking both Sherlock and the chair over with him. Sherlock actually laughed at this, happily planted a jovial kiss on his lover's lips. "And neither of you are monsters, my love. I should not have used that word. I'm-MMPF!" Unfortunately (depending on your point of view), Sherlock's heartfelt apology was lost in a Loki kiss attack.