Chapter 11 :

« Meisner, it's me » I clutch the phone tightly, trying vainly to calm down my shaking body while standing on wobbly legs « You said to call in case Sean got in touch » my voice is barely a whisper as I speak. Tears threaten to cascade under the form of floods any moment now. My eyes are glued to the stairs, hoping Nick won't be down here before I'm done.

Hiding this from him is probably a bad idea, but with everything going south in his life, I really don't feel like adding up one more problem to his pile of concerns. He's still dealing with his mother's death, while adjusting to parenthood and getting ready to move from the house he's lived in for years. I've already turned his life upside down, I really don't have the guts to tell him he's on Sean's death list.

Martin Meisner's guttural voice and authoritative tone echo in the other end of the line "What did he want?" the FBI agent was always all business and a straight to the point type of a guy, this is something I've always both admired and disliked about him…depending on my mood and right now, I'd say I'm grateful he's not into exchanging pleasantries.

"Me" a shudder travels down my body as I add "Nick is in danger"

"We already know that, Adalind"

"Yes, but this time he told me so on the phone, Martin…I…I don't think it's a good idea for my baby and me to stay with him. Sean will only want his head even more" my heart is beating so fast that I'm starting to feel dizzy and out of breath. My ex husband won't back down and he's too powerful and very well connected all over the world. When he picks a target, he achieves his goal and I can't live with the idea that so many people died or are going to die because of me.

"Adalind, listen to me" Meisner's tone is almost pleading, but for all I know, he could simply be tired "The FBI is working on it and Nick Burkhardt is one of the best detectives in the area, he will be fine…your son and you are in good hands, believe me" somehow, it feels like the last part cost him a great deal to say. I decide to box it in the back of my head as I focus on what's at stake right now.

Lifting my eyes to the ceiling, hoping the tears would stay inside, I sigh heavily "I don't want anybody to get hurt, that's all"

A heavy silence falls between us, before Martin finally breaks it "If he ever calls you again, let me know"

Just as I put the phone back in my pocket, Nick appears in front of me. He stares at me with utter bewilderment. I look away, desperate to hide my sad face and wet eyes, but Nick doesn't let go as he takes slow strides toward me, eyes roaming over my face "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" I bring my thumb and forefinger to my temple, nursing a throbbing head "It's just a headache"

Nick doesn't believe it for the slightest, but he's polite enough to let go, or maybe it's simply because he doesn't care and honestly, why would he? I'm the reason his life has become the mess he's trying to manage. If he regarded me before as this unscrupulous lawyer who would stop at nothing to get what she wants, now he probably sees me as a bad omen, that's only the premise of destruction.

"I'll take a small nap" I brush past him and hurry to the guest room. Everything inside of me is screaming from agony. Remembering my mom's comment about Sean being a good match despite not being perfect as she put it, I feel repulsed, a sudden need to throw up makes its way in my system. Instead of heading to the guest room as initially intended, I rush to the bathroom at the end of the hall, after closing the door I open the toiled lid and empty my stomach, feeling slightly better, in a sick twisted way.

Getting to my feet, I wash my mouth and open the door only to find Nick standing with his hands buried in his pockets. His face is expressionless, but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he heard me. I swallow hard, then turn toward the guestroom without saying a word.

%%%

For the past days, we've had more visitors to the house than I can count. Today, I'm the one in charge of the house tour, while Nick is speaking to Theresa over the phone. The poor girl hasn't really had time to mourn her mother's death when she had to go back to Quantico. During one of our rare and brief conversations, Nick told me she should graduate soon. I think she's planning on asking the head office to assign her in Portland.

The septuagenarian couple visiting today is absolutely adorable and to my agreeable surprise, very much in love. The way they stare at each other is something to witness. I might have sighed wistfully few times. One would think that after what I've been through, I shouldn't be yearning for love and not even believe in it, well let me clarify then, I do believe in love, but I don't believe in men. I have trust issues and for good reason, this is why I can't allow myself the luxury of falling head over knees for someone, when I'm certain I'll end up hurt. Sean has ruined my ability to love or trust another man, no matter how much I'm envious of the enamored couples I see around me.

Rosalee and Monroe are one of them. Those two are the epitome of love. Thinking of them brings back an ache to my heart. They've been trying to be pregnant for so long, but in vain. They would be good parents, if not the best.

"We'll take it" Mr Rottermeier, a charming man in his late seventies who speaks his mind without reserve stirs me out of my thoughts. His wife turns her turquoise eyes on him, flabbergasted by her husband's decision "Dear, don't you think we should discuss it first"

"Oh, don't you deceive me Martha, I saw the sparkle in your eyes the moment you stepped inside" he intends for his voice to sound brusque, but there's no mistaking his affection in the way he gazes at his wife.

"But, Richard, we might not afford it" she whispers, probably hoping I wouldn't hear. Well, too bad, because I did and I think my heart just squeezed.

Nick steps in the room with Kelly in his arms "Sorry I wasn't able to show you around, my little sister called" he apologizes with a curt smile. Kelly wiggles in his arms, so I decide to hold him while he speaks to the couple.

"What a handsome little boy you have" Mrs Rottermeiner grins at my baby

I smile proudly as I turn him toward the couple "This is Kelly"

"Ow, he is cute" she reiterates, while her husband bends a little to take a closer look at my son "He must be Calvin's age, isn't he?" he asks his wife, who answers with a nod "Calvin's our Grandson" she explains "We have four children and six grandchildren" I can see so much affection in her eyes as she proceeds to tell us more about her family.

"We're highly interested in this house and we would like to make you an offer" Richard states when we're back to the living room. I consider leaving Nick handle this, as I'm not really supposed to interfere in anything. This is not my house and I have no decision to make, but as I start to walk away, Martha looks at me with astonishment "Do you have to go?"

"I…" my eyes stay on Nick, asking silently for an escape, but instead he surprises me by saying "Stay, Adalind" he turns back his attention on Richard "So, Sir, I'm listening"

Richard Rottermeier's offer is much lower than the ones Nick had before, I know because Nick mentioned in a conversation the best offer he got and this one is not even closely comparable, but to my utter disbelief, Nick accepts it with a smile without taking a second to think it over. Martha and Richard looked equally stunned, but their initial surprise turned quickly into immense delight and happiness.

"I'm calling the movers" Nick states as soon as the Rottermeiers are out of sight.

My curiosity is itching every parcel of my body, I really want to know why he decided to sell his house to this couple when others made better offers. Nick's back goes stiff when I pop out the question. When he turns to face me, I see honesty in his eyes "Buying this house was like a dream to me" he starts with a small smile, eyes travelling in time "I planned my whole future here" his gaze drops to Kelly's face in my arms "If I had kids, I guess I assumed they would grow up here" a lump blocks my throat as guilt runs in my veins "I don't know…it's just that I didn't want just anybody to live here and this couple seemed fit" he runs a hand in his hair nervously "Anyway, I really have to make that call. I need to have us settled down before I go back to work"

I bite my lower lip while I watch him retreat

Kelly Burkhardt was right. She raised a good man and each day I spend with him, I'm surprised to discover another quality hidden under another layer.

The following day, the moving company that Nick contacted sent men very early in the morning. They spend the whole day putting everything in boxes and disassembling furniture. Nick refused to let me help with anything, insisting it was a bad idea for me to make any physical effort when I gave birth less than three weeks ago. Except for the sandwiches I fixed for lunch, I spent the whole day lazing around, while the movers and Nick worked like little ants turning the house into an empty, soulless place within few hours only.

"Hey, look what I found" I grinned as I held a big brown book in my hands, while Nick was sitting in the guestroom with Kelly in his arms. It was already dark outside and it was bedtime for the little ones…and the adults too. Nick looks exhausted, but he insisted to take Kelly to bed.

"What's this?" he glances at the book before recognizing it, his whole face illuminates when he speaks "The Grimm Brothers story book" he grins "My mom gave it to me when I was four, I think…I could barely read a full sentense at the time, so my mom would read me a story every night, while I stared at the pictures on the book" he has a faraway expression while remembering the bittersweet memory. I realize this is the first time Nick ever shared something really personal and from his childhood with me. I sit beside him on the bed and open the book "Would you like to read Kelly a story?" I ask softly, hoping this won't bring too much sorrow and anguish to the surface. To my delight, Nick accepts.

Instead of putting Kelly in his crib, he places him in the middle of the big bed while he lies on Kelly's right side. I take a big breath and crawl to the left side, trapping the baby in the middle.

"Alright, let's see" he turns the pages, one by one

"Could you read Hansel and Gretel?" I wonder excitedly "When I was little, it was a dream of mine to live in a candy house" I grin

Nick stares at me with disbelief "Really! Then your mom must have told you about the danger of sugar for teeth and health" he teases, but my childhood wasn't a fairytale like most people imagine. Not when your mother was Catherine Schade

"My mom didn't want me to read fairytales or any books of that sort" I sigh

Nick's brows furrow "Why?"

I feel uncomfortable under his scrutinizing eyes all of a sudden "She said it was stupid and that she refused to raise me believing in fairytails and the prince charming"

"Ok…I think I see her point, but you were a little girl. Did she read you another type of bedtime stories or at least sing for you or whatever crap we liked as kids?"

I shake my head, ignoring the pity I read in Nick's eyes "She wouldn't even let the night stand lamp switched on" I laugh humorlessly

Nick stares at me few more uncomfortable seconds before finally turning his attention on the book and narrating Hansel and Gretel story. This is the first time someone reads a story to me. My first book of tales was a gift from my aunt Ilda and I had to keep it hidden between the bad and the mattress to make sure my mom wouldn't find it, unfortunately for me, she ended up finding it and as punishment she made me throw it in the chimney and watch it burn.

Nick's soft gentle voice feels like a caress on my body as he reads, before I know it, I'm already gone for the night. Never falling asleep has felt this delicious.

%%%

"Hey" I knock lightly at Nick's bedroom door "We're done"

"So do I" he goes in the walk-in closet to get something when an object attracts my attention. In the top drawer of the chest drawers, I notice a small blue box. Nick must have missed it when he was collecting his belongings. As I pick it, I realize it's a jewelry box. Although curious, I decide not to open it.

I walk toward Nick who's just come out of the walk-in closet "I found this"

He seems genuinely surprised as he takes the box "Thanks" he stares at the box few moments than chuckles

"What's so funny?"

He sits on the edge of the bed and I follow him "I was going to propose to Juliette"

Nick wanted to marry Juliette! I can't believe she cheated on a man who wanted to spend his life with her, then came back asking for a second chance and blaming him for her unfaithfulness.

Instead of hurt or pain, he looks highly bemused. Has he lost his mind? Could be some post-traumatic reaction for all I know.

"And why is it funny?" I sit beside him

"Do you remember that first time we met? You were coming out of a coffee shop, I was with Hank"

I remember it distinctively. It was a beautiful sunny day. It was some time before I met Sean, I was a brilliant lawyer, only interested in her career. I had just a grabbed a coffee to go and was headed to the office, when I noticed two men standing by a car and staring at me. Nick was the one that caught my attention though. I thought he had the most beautiful green eyes I had ever seen. He had a cute smile on as he and his friend were staring at me. I felt really flattered that I attracted the attention of that handsome man, but it was his partner Hank who approached me and when he introduced himself I remembered reading his name in a report that had to do with a case I was defending and I saw an opportunity I couldn't miss. In retrospective, I wish I could go back and undo the mistakes I made.

"You looked at me" Nick continued with a grin

"Wow, as I remember you were looking at me" I give him a stern look which only seems to amuse him more

"Hank teased me about that, believe me"

I feel a blush staining my cheeks as I realize he hasn't denied the fact that he was checking me out "I told him you were too expensive and so out of my league" the revelation is shocking, but before I have time to interrupt him, to tell him that was not true, that I would never have considered myself too good for him, Nick continues with his story "Anyway, Hank bet he could get your number and that was the day I bought that ring" he laughs "And look at us, now"

I give him a small smile "It's quite funny, I admit. But, let me tell you one thing, in my experience, life has a unique senses of humor"

Nick nods with a grin

"But, how come you never proposed if you got that ring so long ago?"

Nick looks uncomfortable "I did, but she said I wasn't ready for such a commitment…That I proposed only because I thought I had to"

"Was she right?" I feel a rush of protectiveness over Nick for a reason I ignore

He remains silent for a second before speaking again "I don't know"

"Sir" one of the movers puts an end to our conversation "We're done"

"I'll go get Kelly" Nick stands up quickly, putting as much distance between us as possible. I feel like confiding in me wasn't his intention and it saddens me.

Well, we're about to have a fresh start and I'm glad I know some more about the mystery that is Nick Burkhardt.