Loki was quite proud of himself. I have found a way to evade Heimdall's sight and also have improved the capabilities of my illusions! Not only will Heimdall be blind but he won't even know it!
While figuring out how to evade Heimdall Loki had figured out a flaw in his reasoning. What good is it, at this point, to evade Heimdall if he knows I'm evading him? If he can't see me then he'll know he's blind. If I blind him to the real me while having an illusion in my place then he won't even know he can't see me.
It should be a foolproof plan but only a fool doesn't take a chance to prove his plan doable if he can. I need to do something so momentous that, if my distraction of his sight fails, he'll report me to the Allfather. Not something so momentous, though, that it would get me into unbearable trouble. What would Heimdall be bound to report and not keep in his inscrutable counsel?
Loki kneaded his forehead as he thought. At first, seeing the disdain and disrespect he got as justification for leaving had helped. As time passed, unfortunately, it was too much for him and the old feelings of bitterness and hunger to be seen as equal to his brother had returned. I am sick of being called a coward! I need to do something that, even if no one else knows about it, will prove I am as brave as Thor! To fit that it must be something anyone would be fearful of.
Loki's mind traveled to the nightmares he had had as a child. He remembered seeing frost giants taking him from his family, hurting him and feeling very cold. Loki rubbed his arms for warmth and remembered running to Thor after having nightmares as a child. Thor had been kind then. He hadn't spoken of courage or lack of it. He would hold Loki close and promise that no one and nothing would ever hurt his brother. Thankfully the nightmares had receded as Loki had grown, because he would've been seen as a coward otherwise, but thinking of Jotunheim even now caused a chill in his bones.
I'll go to Jotunheim but I'll be careful to encounter no one. Going there alone is not the action of a coward. If caught, I could say I was practicing a tactic for the good of Asgard. Avoiding the frost giants would be proof of my desire to preserve the peace. That I went alone would be proof of my courage. Surely father would not punish me too severely? In fact, being caught could come in useful if I was just banned to my rooms without visits from anyone. Then I could plan in peace.
He reached for a jewel. Not just any jewel but one he liked to meditate with sometimes. He had added some of his magic and a command. When activated, the command would call upon the magic he stored in the jewel and project an illusion of him staring at the jewel. The illusion would appear while he disappeared. Thus Heimdall would be not be blinded to Loki and not even know it. Ha! Not just anyone could accomplish this. Even father can't! As far as I know.
This worked without any problems. Loki took in a breath and reached for Yggdrasil's branches. He traced a path and stepped into Jotunheim.
He really didn't understand what all the complaining had been about. The furs he brought made him uncomfortably warm. He was called pitiful and weak, but he could wander about here in his normal cloths. Loki easily avoided any frost giants and wandered around. Feeling daring he wandered closer to what seemed to the frost giant king's palace. As he approached he felt uncomfortable. Not because of the cold, or the strangeness the soldiers had complained of, but because he wasn't cold. In fact, it all felt somehow very unpleasantly familiar.
He wandered towards what looked like a ruin of a temple. Maybe this is where father took the casket! It could also give me insight into what these monsters value. Surely insight into any enemy, even these monsters, could be helpful. All anyone says of the giants is that they are cold and evil. Monsters. Well, I am not afraid.
As he approached the temple his feeling of uneasiness grew.
Cold, so cold. How many times had he woken so cold?
"Thor! Thor! I had the dream again!"
"Loki, you're freezing. Did you see frost giants again?"
"No this was worse. I was alone and cold and no one was there. Maybe the frost giants were coming to kill me."
"You will never be alone and no one will kill you. You are my brother and I won't let anyone hurt you."
This place made him think of nightmares: cold, being alone. No it can't be. I've never been here before!
A possibility occurred to him. He did not feel strangeness here unless odd familiarity counted as strange. He wasn't cold like all the soldiers who fought in the war had complained of.
No. If I was a…I wouldn't have felt cold in my dreams. Frost giants never feel cold…unless, perhaps, a baby could feel cold an adult might not…It can't be!
He struggled to hold up his blindness spell. He fell in the snow and looked around with pained eyes.
His lack of strength.
He didn't look like the rest of the family.
His magic.
The lack of his father's love.
His mother's inability to answer why he was so different.
The favoring of Thor.
No. No. No.
Loki wished himself back to his quarters and barely remembered to drop the illusion at the same time he dropped the blinding spell.
No, it can't be.