7

"Shit Bal we…we got to stop" John told him and Bal was suddenly snapped out of it, blushed as well.

"Shit John I'm s-" John cut Bal off by muttering, it's not his fault. They sat there for a second, then Bal suddenly smiles and slides out from underneath John.

"You should take a shower John" Bal teased and John began to cuss, when Bal's sneaky tail turned on the water on full blast but cold.

"Pure fucking evil Bal" John hissed at the demon, who just laughs at the exorcist, who begins to laugh as well. John had helped a lot when it came to having Bal get over being blind, mostly because the man had refused to coddle Bal, that and with the phrase and patients John gave, it helped immensely.

Nightmares sometimes still came, but mostly brushed off flashbacks were less and more just shocking then scary nowadays and didn't leave Bal a mess, like they did before. There was a sudden knock at the door which the exorcist answered, only to find that it was Angela. John felt the color drain from his face, he gulped Bal was oblivious to the threat, the detective may have pose to him wandered around behind John, doing chores around the house.

John stepped out into the hallway hoping the woman wouldn't see the supposed demon. He found that it was useless as she gasped and she wasn't looking at him, but behind him. She then forced open the door taking it from Johns hand, thrusting it open. "What is that bastard doing here?!" she shrieked and John tried to pull her out of their, and flinched when he saw the man loose all color and drop the stuff he was using luckily nothing was glass. "Angela hold on!" John growled pulling her out of the apartment and closing the door, hoping this didn't set the man back much. John flinched when he heard sobs from the other side of the door, but didn't go a comfort the man not yet, until he explained something to Angela.

He dove into the story about the rape before Gabriel, then went into that mess and watched the cop go green, when he got into some of the gory little details. He finished with some of the stories about what Bal had did, or said. All in all John was sort of happy to get the cop to nearly puke in some weird sick way of his. She was about to attack the demon when she first saw him, and John thought that maybe the angels should have told her about forgiveness.

"He said there was a demon form of him that told him to do bad stuff?!" she yelped, then gasped when John nodded. John then opened the door and sighed, when he saw the demon curled up the on the couch in the fetal position. John walked over and began to pet the man's head, and whisper things to him about it being all right that he only killed Beeman and Hennesy that he didn't hurt anybody else. Bal protested, trying to move from the touch and John knew it was because the demon thought he didn't deserve to be forgiven, and treated nicely but John loved to show the demon affection anyways. Originally it was by accident, a way to calm the man, then later to make him feel better about being so weak and blind, now it was a way for them to connect and calm Bal down at the few times that something like this got the better of him.

Angela watched with fascination, unable to fathom the fact John was being so kind to Bal. It was fascinating to say the least she knew John could be kind, but being patient as well was new too her. Sure John had been nice, but not as understanding as he was with Balthazar. He had at first very understood on helping with getting her powers in check, and helping her with getting the sight under control, but eventually he got sick of her and the fact she feared the demons.

She left after that, seeing that her presence had set off a bad memory for the man. She felt a little bad, but at the same time, she felt a little bit of satisfaction about seeing the man in a little bit of pain was nice. Could you blame her? He had killed people tempted people all in all, maybe he deserved it.

John seemed to have read her mind, because he began to usher her out. Once Angela was gone John went back to Bal who was in the fetal position on the couch still, hands over his ears murmuring something John couldn't understand.

John slowly helped the man out of his stupor, easing him out with soft spoken words and soft touches.

What is with me? , thought John as he helped Bal out of his stupor. John at first had only tired when he had first got Bal to shut him up, and because seeing the man freaking out was slightly scary. He had dealt with exorcism and all other sort of things, but seeing the man freak out was too close to how he had been like while at Ravenscar. It brought back bad, old memories, that sent Johns own skeletons busting out of their closet. The things that sent him into Ravenscar, came roaring back.

Sure he had saved all those kids in hell, but others things stacked up against him. His friends and the supernatural deaths, they had been put thou . Every time it had come to them or him, and he chose himself every time. Could you blame him? They were destined for heaven, Beeman, Hennesy, Chas, unlike him who was destined for hell since Newcastle.

John had felt himself softening around Bal, not a lot but more than he had around, well anybody except for Kit. His heart had melted for the women. When he had lost her to his inability to take himself out of the magical community, he fell apart. Magic was a drug, and he couldn't give it up, the magic refused to give him up as well.

A fellow psychic and Bal, being intelligent made him good company for John. He had opinions and voiced them, John gladly told his, they could discuss things without really truly fighting. It was nice to talk to someone alive, and who didn't want to pick a fight with him. Problem…it was turning into something more. Like he had with Mercury, Chas, Zed and others, Bal began to take down his walls that shielded his beaten, battered soul. Bal didn't realize it, but then again he was at a lost at what to do with Johns company, and the fact the magician was helping him thro such a dark time in his life. Memoires of what truly happened were coming back, but with it, confusing things with it. Bal tried to puzzle it out but it was hard, the only thing that made sense, was two men who had been his friends. Bal had began to cry one time about it, but John had explained that even he couldn't find the man, until he had broken the barrier. It had been a month now, and his friends still haven't found him, but that was okay he had John to keep him company now. Its not like he didn't miss the brothers, but he worried they wouldn't like the new him, the quieter him.

Probably would think your weak kid, cant handle yourself, can only make a few days before you fall apart, looking to John Constantine for help. Are you insane, you killed two of his friends! This was what Bal was hearing, he didn't see Balthazar anymore, but still heard him. John heard him, as the chant got louder and flinched when he heard it. "Shut up Balthazar …just shut up" Bal hissed and John began to touch him even more, Bal could smell him feel his aura radiating fear and felt as his aura began to touch his, trying to sooth his soul and Bal wondered where the hell was this relationship going.

Authors Note: ... I AM SORRY! Trying to write this in character and such was a pain in the ass also I had ACT MME and Work Keys and school in general so yeah I will stop complaining and please review it helps bolster me to write :)