Josh's POV

Finally they give Bella an epidural so she's not screaming in pain anymore. Now she's sad and she won't tell me why, I know it has something to do with Sam but I don't know what happened when he came to see her.

"Sweetheart please tell me what's wrong? What happened with Sam?" I beg her to tell me but she just starts crying more.

Sue comes in and says just tell him Bella, it's OK.

"We broke up." She tells me quietly.

I look at Sue and she shakes her head yes, like that's supposed to explain it.

"I told him I can't run to him anymore. I want to run to you and he needs to worry about Emily first, before me. I want you to stop running to Sam too. I know I'm difficult and I'm sorry but you're supposed to love me but every time I get upset you just hand me off to Sam." She tells me still crying and I feel bad because all I really want to do is get Sam to calm her down.

"Bella I am so sorry you feel like that, you have to talk to me, tell me these things. I love you so much, I just hate when you're upset and Sam is so much better at knowing how to make you happy, you're not difficult, you're just so emotional which is fine. We kind of got thrown in to this but you're right, it should be just us more. I'll stop, as you put it, handing you off to Sam. I love you." I tell her and she smiles and says I love you too.

"You're not mad at me?" She asks and I ask her why I would be mad. "For loving Sam so much." She whispers.

"No of course not." I tell her.

"You're never mad at me." She says it almost accusingly. Sue coughs I think trying not to laugh before saying she'll be back in a few minutes.

"Do you want me to be mad at you?" I ask her.

"No, but I've been a bitch lately and sometimes I think maybe even if you are mad you're pretending to not be because I'm pregnant and insecure but one day all the times you were pretending you weren't mad are all going to add up and you're going to get really mad at me and it's going to be a huge fight and I don't want that." She tells me.

"Sweetheart the only time I've ever been mad at you is when you wouldn't let in your life and I promise you when I am mad at you I will tell you. Can you please just stop worrying now and relax?"

"I'll try."

The doctor comes in and tells her it's time to start pushing and I ask her if she wants me to go get Sue.

"I kind of just want it to be you; do you think she'll mind?" I tell her no I don't think she'll mind, I leave out the part where I'm sure she'll be relieved because she's trying to keep Charlie and Emily calm and trying to keep Sam from acting like he just broke up with his girlfriend.

The nurse comes in then and tells her she needs to start pushing.

A very miserable hour later Jason is crying and Bella is crying and demanding they hand her the baby.

They finish up and leave us with Jason.

"He's so tiny." She whispers. "Do you want to hold him?"

I take him from her, he is tiny. I don't remember Sam being this small.

"How are you feeling sweetheart?" I ask her.

"I feel amazing. I feel like in this moment everything is exactly how it's supposed to be. I love you Josh."

I sit down next to her and hand her the baby back, "I love you too Bella."

"And I love you Jason, I love you so much. A lot of people love you." She tells him quietly; like she's afraid she's going to scare him. "We should let them in now. But only like one at a time. Maybe two. Two is OK."

"Are you sure you're ready? They can wait as long as you want them too." She says no she's ready; she really wants Sam and her dad first. I go get them and I was right about Sue she was relieved.

I start to walk back but Emily says please wait.

"I know she told Sam she can't be so involved with him anymore. Is she OK because he's not? I mean I don't think he won't ever be but if he's not OK and she's the one that just had a baby I can't imagine how she must be."

"She's actually OK I think and he loves you Emily." I tell her and she says I know.

"Do you think he loves me enough to be OK without her so much though?" She asks and I think about what she's asking me and what I would think the answer would be for Bella.

"I think it will take some time but I think they will both be fine."

"Thank you then, sorry I kept you from her. It's just everyone says they understand but you're the only person who's really in the same situation as I am."

"Don't be sorry, I'm sure she's fine with them. When they come out she wants you and Sue. Bella loves you too Emily, I really think you have more to do with her decision than me."

"She loves you too, whenever I'm with her she talks about you all the time. She adores you even if at the same time she's still terrified you're going to leave her." The look on her face says she did not mean to say that. "I'm so sorry but please don't say anything to her."

"She really thinks that?" I ask both of them because Sue knows her pretty well too.

"I really didn't mean to say anything." Emily looks upset and Sue is telling me to leave her alone.

"Sue?"

"Of course she's afraid you're going to leave her Josh, it will take a very long time if ever to get over that. She has abandonment issues, you know this. And no matter how much anyone tells her you've changed she can't see that because she didn't know you then. To her, in a way you're the exact same person who left Sam and Alison, honestly the only person who could probably convince her otherwise is Alison and I don't see that happening." Sue tells me and I feel like an idiot not knowing this.

"What can I do?" I ask her.

"Don't prove her right. Support her and love her like you've done so far. She'll worry about it less and less eventually. You do know that if you ever actually leave her though you'll break her right?" She tells me.

"I'll never leave her." I tell her and she says good now go back to her.

I walk back into her room and Sam is sitting on the bed next to her and Charlie is holding Jason. She looks up and smiles at me.

I am going to spend the rest of my life making her happy and showing her I'll never leave her.