Josh's POV
Before we left the hospital after Bella's surgery Renee told her how sorry she was for the way she treated her both by leaving her as a baby and telling her she never loved her when she showed up with Sam. She told her that she wouldn't let herself love her because she was afraid of being trapped and she told Bella that no matter what she will always be grateful to her for saving Jillian's life and hopes she and Jillian can get to know each other better. Then she asked if she could be a part of her and Jason and Brooke's life.
From the look on Bella's face I could tell she was torn. Renee leaving her messed her up but it also kind of shaped her life. She spent so long hating her but she spent all that time hating me too. She looked at me like what do I do? I wanted so much to just tell her not to let Renee in her life, in my kid's life but I couldn't. In the end I'm no better than Renee and Sam not only forgave me but helped Bella forgive me too. I told her it's all up to her; I would support her either way.
She told Renee she was willing to get to know her but it would be a while before she would let her anywhere near Jason or Brooke.
For the next 6 months they met every couple of weeks half way between here and there and Bella got to know both Jillian and Renee but never with the kids.
Today Renee and her husband are bringing Jillian here to spend part of the summer and Bella is a nervous wreck.
"I don't know what to make for lunch." She tells me like it's the most important thing in the world.
"You need to chill out, make whatever you want or we can order something." I tell her.
"What if they don't like it?" She asks me like I'm stupid.
"Sweetheart most people aren't nearly as picky as you are. We'll order pizza, everyone likes pizza." I tell her.
"Maybe doctors don't eat pizza." She argues.
"Well 11 years olds do and you do and Jason does so I'm willing to take that risk." I laugh and she sticks her tongue out at me and says fine.
A few minutes later they show up and as soon as Bella answers the door and Jillian bounces through Bella seems to forget she was freaking out.
Bella officially introduces them all to Jason and Brooke and Jason is all over Jillian which is odd for him. He usually sticks to people he knows. Brooke on the other hand loves everyone; I'm hoping she stays like that.
We eat lunch and talk about our plans with Jillian which is mostly the beach. Bella would live on the beach if she could I think, she takes Jason and Brooke almost every day. Jason loves it and even Brooke seems happier outside.
Phil and I go out to the car to get Jillian's things and then we show her to the room she'll be staying in.
Renee is telling Bella everything she can possibly think to tell her about Jillian.
"Renee, she's going to be fine. They're going to take care of her; you can call her every day." Phil tells her.
"Renee, I promise I will treat her like I would want someone to treat Jason or Brooke. She'll be fine and you can call and Skype and you're only 5 hours away." Bella tells her.
"She's never stayed with anyone besides Kylie." She tells her.
"Mom, I'm going to be fine. She gave me her kidney; she's going to make sure I live. Otherwise it would have been a waste." Jillian jokes.
"I love you Jillian." Renee tells her and she tells her I love you too and then she hugs both of them goodbye.
As soon as they are gone Bella and Jillian get ready to go to the beach.
"Are you coming?" Bella asks me.
"No, go have fun with her, I'll keep the kids. What do you want for dinner?" I ask her.
She asks Jillian who says she doesn't care, she'll eat anything. Bella looks at her like she's insane.
"Fine, just make whatever then." She tells.
"Very helpful sweetheart. Sam and Emily are coming for dinner and then I told them we would keep Ryan for the night until sometime tomorrow afternoonish." I tell her.
"He's still not sleeping is he?"
"Nope." He's just 3 months old but he's very needy even for an infant. Sam says Emily is exhausted to the point of non-functional and even though he wakes up with him often she doesn't sleep through it. She's getting about 4 hours of sleep a day, she's rethinking wanting 4 kids though so Sam is actually kind of glad for that.
"OK well then we'll be back around 5 OK?" I tell her not to worry about it and kiss her goodbye.
"No leave me mama." Jason grabs her leg as soon as he realizes she's leaving.
"I'll only get gone for a couple of hours baby. You stay with daddy and Brooke." He starts crying and she tells him fine, let's go get you ready.
And I'm the pushover.
After she gets Jason ready they all leave me here with just Brooke now who is content chilling out and watching TV with me. She falls asleep lying on my chest and I must have fallen asleep because the ringing doorbell scares the crap out of both of us. Bella would kill me for falling asleep holding her. She's a bit overprotective.
"Come on Brooke let's see who's at the door, it's probably Sam hoping to get rid of Ryan early." She's still crying from being woken up.
I open the door to Alison. I do not want to deal with her crap right now but at least Bella isn't here.
"I see you still have no idea how to take care of your kids." She tells me with way too much attitude.
"I'm not in the mood for your crap Alison, what do you want?"
"I miss Bella." She tells me. I let her come in because I have a feeling I'm not getting rid of her easily and I need to feed Brooke.
"Well you should have thought about missing Bella before you tried to poison her against me. Go home Alison."
"Why do you call me Alison?"
"Because it's your name, what else would I call you?" I ask her confused.
"You always called me Ali."
"Oh yeah that bothered Bella since I was the only that called you that so I told her I would stop." I tell her.
"Bella gets everything she wants doesn't she?" She asks bitterly.
"Why shouldn't Bella get everything she wants?" I ask her.
"You were mine." She tells me quietly.
"Alison that was so long ago and it wasn't right. We weren't right for each other. I shouldn't have just disappeared because of Sam but we would have never lasted. And obviously Bella had nothing to do with me leaving since she was just a freaking infant. I never loved you like I love her. You're supposed to love her too, you were like a mother to her and you abandoned her and then pushed her to near exhaustion by lying to her." I tell her.
"It's not fair having to watch you play the good husband and father to her and her kids!" She yells.
"They're my kids too. Bella never meant for this to happen. She wouldn't have agreed to have gone out with me if she had known who I was but does she really deserve to suffer because of our life together? You had to know she was miserable because everyone else knows. Do you really think Charlie liked the idea of us together? Or even Sam? But they love her like she thought you loved her." I finish feeding Brooke and lay her in her pack n play. "This was never about you Alison."
"When did you decide to walk out on me and Sam?" She asks.
"I don't think I ever really decided, I just drove one day and I realized that I couldn't stand you or me or us together anymore. I did love you Alison but it was more of a first love, high school love that you think is all that matters. But then life happens and it's not enough. We were not enough. I was young and stupid and selfish and I just drove. I couldn't handle life anymore, I couldn't handle working all the time and then you running off with Sarah as soon as I got home leaving me with Sam. I could've handle things better but then you could have too."
"And then if you decide you can't handle this?" She asks and for the first time I wonder if this is about her or if she really is worried about Bella and just really mishandling it.
"It's so different now Alison. Bella is everything to me, she makes me a better person. I would never leave her. And I would never just disappear on Sam or Jason or Brooke. I know how lucky I am that Sam forgave me and that Bella forgave me and that I have a second chance to be to Jason and Brooke who I wasn't to Sam. I wouldn't do anything to ruin that." I tell her.
"What about the age difference? Don't you think Bella deserves to be with someone she can spend her whole life with?" She asks.
"Either one of us could die tomorrow. I don't know what your goal is here but you're not going to convince me to leave her. Please just go home and leave her alone." I ask her.
"I really do miss her and I miss Sam too, he comes but he's distance and I know it's because of her. She always comes first." She sounds so sad, I almost feel bad for her. "I barely even know Ryan."
"Emily and Ryan come first to Sam. It was hard for both of them but they don't depend on each other so much anymore. If you can promise me you won't get all bitter and crap I will ask Bella if she minds you staying for dinner. Sam and Emily will be here but so will Bella's little sister, so none of this negative crap." She agrees and Bella agrees to letting her stay, I think Bella is so happy with her Jillian and the beach she would agree to anything but I know she misses Alison too and Alison really does seem concerned about her.
"Can I pick her up?" She asks about Brooke and I tell her yes and just hope Bella doesn't hate me.
I tell her I need to start dinner and she asks what I'm making.
"Um probably chicken tenders and salad."
"She's still overly picky I guess?" She asks laughing and I shake my head yes.
"What are you doing here Mom?" Sam asks as he walks in through the kitchen. Bella is always forgetting to lock that door.
"I came to see Bella and I'm going to stay for dinner, is that OK with you?" She asks him worriedly.
"Not my house." He answers her looking at me.
"She said it was fine." I tell him and he relaxes.
Soon after Sam and Emily come Bella and Jillian and Jason come home with Jason crashed in Bella's arms. I take him from her and take him upstairs.
I hear her saying hi to everyone and introduce Jillian and when I come back she smiles at me so I know she's not upset about Alison holding Brooke. I walk to where she's sitting on a barstool and wrap my arms around her; she leans back into me and whispers I love you. I kiss her head and tell her I love her too.
"She's so beautiful Bella, and so happy. She reminds me of you when you were this age." Alison tells her looking at me. She really does look a lot like Bella did as a baby.
"What is this Alison?" Bella asks her.
"I miss you." Alison tells her.
"You miss me or you miss Sam?" Bella asks her. She knows her well.
"I miss both of you Bella. You are like a daughter to me, or you were before I messed up. I hate that I don't even know your kids."
"They're Josh's kids too. Can you get over that? Or is this just another plot to destroy us?" Bella asks her.
Emily asks Jillian to come help her in the kitchen. Jillian looks disappointed but she follows her anyways. Sam takes Brooke from Alison and follows them.
"I don't know Bella, I can try." She tells her.
"Fine, you can stay but the first negative thing you say towards Josh or anyone else you are out of my house and my life and you will not get another chance." She tells her and then she gets up and hugs her and walks into the kitchen. Only Bella.
"You raised her well Alison. She's so loving and forgiving. She is an amazing mother and wife."
"I might have raised her, but you made her strong. She would have never stood up to me like that before. You really do love her don't you?" She asks me.
"Yes. I really do Alison. So please tell me you're done trying to turn her against me?"
"Yeah I'm done. I want her in my life and if that means I occasionally have to deal with you then OK. Are you OK with me being in your life and Jason and Brooke's life?" She asks.
"Bella really does get pretty much anything she wants." I tell her laughing. It's true. "I don't hate you Alison and I really am sorry for leaving and for coming back like this."
At dinner everyone is talking and laughing and I'm thinking about how crazy this family is.
My daughter is only a few months older than my grandson.
After dinner Alison leaves and soon after Sam and Emily leave and Bella and Jillian take over the TV watching a bunch of girl movies I'm not sure Jillian should be watching with Brooke snuggled up with Bella and Ryan screaming his head off upstairs with me. Jason is running up and down the stairs between us.
I'm pacing the room trying to get Ryan to quit screaming when Bella comes in with a struggling Jason.
"Trade?" I give her Ryan and grab Jason before he escapes. He almost immediately calms down. She tells him he's lucky she loves his daddy or he would so not be spending the night.
"Where's Jillian?" I ask her and she tells me she fell asleep on the couch and Brooke is sleeping her in pack n play. "How are you with the whole Alison thing?"
"I kind of feel bad for making you deal with her." She tells me.
"She's Sam's mom Bella, it would be nice to be able to have birthday parties and holidays without him having to worry about who to invite." I tell her and she says yeah I guess that's true.
"You go to bed, I'll go get Brooke and get Jason down, and maybe you should take that one with you." I tell her and she laughs and says fine.
By time I get Brooke and Jason to bed Bella is sleeping with Ryan sleeping peacefully next to her. I very gently move him to the bassinet still set up from Brooke.
She's so beautiful. I love her more and more every day.