CHAPTER FIFTY TWO REMEMBRANCE

The characters, places and situations of Doc Martin are owned by Buffalo Pictures. This story makes no claim of remuneration or ownership, nor do I make any attempt to infringe upon any rights of the owners or producers.

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Update: Louisa and daughter Joan are still on holiday in France. James and Emily are still on their honeymoon. Martin is dealing with Louisa's mother, Eleanor who has shown up. He is so hoping Louisa will get home soon to sort matters. The thread of "remembrance" is still Eleanor and Terry. I apologize for the long delay in posting. Thank you for your following and reviews. We join Louisa and Joan after lunch and news from Martin that Eleanor has appeared on the doorstep.

CHAPTER FIFTY TWO

The grass in the meadow was cool and tickled my arms. I turned my head and saw Mum was still asleep as I had been until just moments ago. The sun was warm, but not hot and it felt perfect as we rested in this earthy featherbed. After our scrumptious lunch it was natural to drift off into an afternoon nap. Mum was beautiful, her salt and pepper hair reflecting the afternoon light.

After our cake and coffee we needed to walk a bit and the streets of Villequier just naturally led up to pastures and woods. We stepped up and over the pass-through in the fence and entered a large pasture with sheep grazing. It was Mum who said, "Joan we must lie down for awhile." And so we did and drifted off into aimless sleep. Now, not wanting to awaken her, I began thinking about Dad's call. So my granny was in Portwenn. Now that's a surprise. She evidently had returned to Spain after James's wedding and simply packed up and come back.

When I was quite young Mum would tell me that I should never worry; that she and Dad would always be close. They would never go away. These were strange words to me because I would never think of Mum or Dad leaving. I mean I did know that Quinten's dad left when he divorced Mrs. Smith, but not my parents. Mum said this more than once so I finally asked her one day why I would think she would go away.

I don't think Mum realized how often she told me this so my question surprised her.

I sensed a hesitancy in her answering.

"Oh, Joan, this is something I had hoped you would never need to know, but I suppose it's best. Stories are told and retold in a small village. I wouldn't want you to hear this from a school mate. You see when I was just 11 your granny left. She and your grandfather had problems and she decided to go away. I don't think she meant to stay away, but she did. I didn't see her for 10 years when she showed up with a man. His name was Javier. She didn't stay but a few days. I didn't see her again until James was born when without a word she just showed up at the door again.

I was gobsmacked and said, "Mum, I never knew. How could Granny do that?"

"Joan, I don't know really. I was too young to understand everything that was going on. Please don't think ill of your granny. What is past is over and we must leave it there. It has been hard but I do love my mum and dad. We have to take care of each other. We're family."

So I knew a bit about my grandparents, well at least Mum's parents. I actually knew nothing of Dad's parents and it was something that was never discussed. If the subject was broached, it was quickly diverted into some inane present concern.

So lying here in this lush verdant carpet I was thinking of my grandparents as I know them. My grandfather lives in Portwenn and is a very sweet man. I know he was in prison and had his problems. Once he told me he wasn't proud of his past but he didn't want to talk about it. "No use in digging up old bones Joanie. I'm not proud of all I done, but now I can live here and do a bit of pay-back. With the new Pension Credits I have enough brass to have my little house and garden. And I have to say, Lass, your mum and dad are kinder to me than I deserve."

Now my Granny Eleanor was all together a different kettle of fish. She lived off in Spain and from the time I was 14 I spent two weeks with her every summer. James had told me Mum and Dad had a row or two as to whether or not we would get to visit her. Stories in literature would call her eccentric, a word I didn't know at 14. I did understand my dad's words, "Louisa, you would let our children be with your crazy mother who smokes like a stack?" Somehow in the resolution we went to Granny's every summer. There must have been some agreement about the smoking as she never smoked in our presence.

It was fun being with Granny Eleanor. She took us to the beach and we took bus rides all over Spain. She cooked paella, a dish with rice and all kinds of seafood. It was wonderful. At first it didn't look good to me. I remember James holding up a tiny octopus and putting it in his mouth and betting I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't of course, except that I could never let him better me. So I ate the octopus, quite a chewy bugger I must say. After that, paella was one of my favorite foods. Granny was loud and wore fun clothes of many colors. And Dad should have never worried. When it came to looking after me, she was a mother hen. I never was allowed to go anywhere alone.

When I first went to visit her, Granny told me that when Mum was a little girl she always tucked her in and stroked her hair. Now I know where Mum learned it. I guess Granny stroking my hair helped her remember when Mum was little. When we were out one visit we were staying in a guest house in a very small village. The windows were wide open because it was hot. The sky was covered with a white blanket of stars. Being in the same bed Granny was stroking my hair and I finally asked a question I guess she hoped I would never ask.

"Granny, why did you run away to Spain when Mum was a little girl?"

She kept rubbing my head and was silent for a long while. Finally she said, "Joan, the story is too long and confusing for me to remember to you. And it would not be right for me to say bad things about your Grandad Terry. We had our problems and I wanted to get away from them. I didn't know I would stay away forever, but I did. What I did to your Mum was horrible. I didn't know if she ever would speak to me again, but she did. I thought I was a bad mum and left and it only proved I was a really bad mum."

I could tell she was sad and I didn't know what to say. She finally spoke, very loudly actually. "Joan, don't you ever run away from your troubles. Let me tell you what will happen if you do. Your troubles will just follow you. You can't get away. You will look in a mirror and there you are staring your problems in the face. Promise me, you will never run away."

"I won't Granny. I promise, I won't."

I didn't know what my promise implied but it seemed to bring peace to that little room that night. I felt her hand in my hair and watched the stars as I fell asleep.

I must have been reminiscing with my eyes closed because when I looked over at Mum she was awake and looking at me.

"I didn't want to wake you Joanie."

"Oh, I wasn't asleep really. I was just thinking and remembering time with Granny in Spain. Dad's call made me think of it. Do you think she has returned to us to stay?"

"Yes, Joan, I do. Why would she return so soon after James's wedding? Your dad said she brought several large suitcases. I will simply have to sort all this when we get home."

"Well, Mum, I hope she and Dad get on alright. It's never been the right match-up has it?"

"Joan, if you only knew how it was in the early days before you were born. There was no respect between them. But there came a day when your Granny thanked your dad for taking good care of me and her grandchildren. It was hard for him to be nasty to her after that. Their treatment of each other was heavily seasoned with sarcasm but there developed a guarded respect. Both the respect and the sarcasm have survived to this day.

"We'll talk to your dad tonight, but right now let's walk back so we can get a bath before our supper. This afternoon has been simply heavenly, hasn't it?"

"Yes Mum, it has."

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I began to wake up and felt disoriented. Where was I? Wherever I was there had better be a loo nearby. I sat up, the oxygen mask still on my face and I quickly remembered this being Louisa's house.

Returning from the loo I heard a knock on the front door. I heard Martin's voice,

"Terry! Did you walk all the way up here? What in the world for?"

"Martin the chemist told me you bought the oxygen tanks for your mother-in-law. That can only mean Ellie is here. If Eleanor is here I thought I would come up and see her."

"She is still asleep. Maybe you could see her another day, but you can't walk back now. Sit down and I'll make coffee. Have you had breakfast?"

So Terry had come to see me. My mind went to James's wedding where Terry and I had seen each other again after over 50 years.

Louisa had insisted someone travel with me to the wedding. Javier's grandson, Alfredo was my designated companion. After Javier died his children and their spouses treated me kindly. Their kids became like grandchildren to me. Fredi was a handsome teen and was happy to travel with his English abuelita. We traveled to Portwenn in a taxi, arriving at Louisa's house late in the afternoon the day before James's wedding. Being totally exhausted from the trip caused Martin to make a fuss about my state of health. I told him a night's sleep would set me to rights. Thankfully a knock on the door silenced the harangue, at least for a time.

The wedding day dawned atypically clear and bright. I hoped it was a prophetic nod to my grandson's and Emily's day and life together. Martin was in his office and Louisa and I found ourselves at table with tea and toast. I just had to ask Louisa a question. I know it was a damp thought on this special day.

"Loulou, do you think James and Emily are suited for each other? I can't bear the thought that anyone would ever go through what your dad and I did to each other."

"Mum, I have seen them go through some storms and I couldn't be more hopeful.

I think they're a good match. If I could have ordered up a daughter-in-law I couldn't have imagined a better person than Emily for our James."

Martin was to drive me to the church. When we arrived quite a crowd had gathered outside. While waiting in the car another car pulled in a short distance away. When the occupants exited I recognized Terry immediately. It had to be him. My eyes took in every detail of my erstwhile husband. He was a little stooped and had a full head of gray hair. In a word he looked old. Well I was old, wasn't I? Two old relics who, given our past, didn't deserve to be at this wedding. I don't know how a deserted daughter can welcome her runaway mother back, but Louisa and her cranky husband had done just that. I had told no one that I was making plans to return to Portwenn for good. Louisa and Martin wouldn't turn me away. I could be pretty sure of that, but what about Terry? He lived here now. I had deserted him too and it had been over 50 years since there had been a word between us. The few times I had been in Portwenn he had been in the Queen's safe keeping.

We had entered the church after the majority had been seated. A young man introduced himself to me,

"I know you are James's grandmother. I am his friend Arthur and will escort you to your seat Mrs. ...uh?"

"Good to meet you Arthur. James has told me about you. And it's Glasson, Mrs.

Glasson."

Music had begun and I was the first grandparent to be escorted to my seat. Arthur offered me his arm and I took it. He led me down the aisle and stopped beside the third pew to the empty seat next to Terry.

He looked up at me as I moved to sit down. It was a look of confusion and then a cautious recognition. All he said was, "Ellie?"