Chapter 15

Kim Possible posed in the doorway of the guest room, dressed in a lacy negligee she had not previously found an occasion to use. She leaned against the door frame with one arm, the other hand resting suggestively on her mostly bare thigh.

"Kim." Shego's voice choked as she looked at Kim with wide eyes, sitting on the edge of the bed dressed in her nightgown.

"You like?"

Shego swallowed. "What are you doing here, Kim?" Her voice was hoarse.

"I think you know."

Kim moved into the room, pulling the door closed behind her. She stalked towards Shego like a predator, hips swinging enticingly. Appropriately Shego sat frozen like prey, green eyes fixed on hers. Kim's piercing gaze shifted from the big eyes to Shego's parted lips.

"Kim, we can't."

It was a weak protest, and they both knew it. Kim pushed Shego down on the bed and straddled her hips, looking down on the unprotesting woman. She leaned down to capture her lips with her own. For a while Shego just lay there, accepting the advance, but after a while she started kissing her back and wrapped her arms around Kim.

"Shego," Kim whispered as she slipped a hand between her thighs, lying on top of the woman.

"Shego," Kim whispered as she slipped a hand between her thighs, lying alone in her bed. Turned on by her fantasy as she was, it didn't take her long at all to bring herself to a climax. She lay on top of her sheets afterward, covered in sweat and panting. She knew that if anyone walked in right now, it would be obvious what she had been doing. She imagined Shego walking in on her, and almost started touching herself again.

Kim knew it was bad to have such thoughts about another person, to make them an unwitting star of her lurid fantasies, but being naughty was a thrill she wasn't very familiar with. Imagining herself seducing Miss Go—the proper, modest, blushing Miss Go—made her excited. It wasn't quite the illicit thrill she'd experienced when she was planning to sneak out to seduce Shego all those weeks ago, but it had similar sense of transgression about it. It was moments like this that made her understand Shego, the old Shego. Being a bad girl held an undeniable attraction.

She wished it was the old Shego in the guest room. She knew where she stood with her, and she suspected her little fantasy wouldn't have needed to stay a fantasy. She didn't dare to push it with this good Shego, not with the mixed messages she was giving her. Did she like her or did she not? Would she succumb to seduction like the bad Shego had, or would she resist? Kim didn't know.

Kim liked the nice Shego, she did. It was great to be able to see a side of her she hadn't before. It was just that it hadn't really sunk in before that this was permanent. This wasn't an episode to get to know a different version of Shego before the universe reset itself. The real Shego, the one that had inspired her desire in the first place, was gone.

Kim shivered, feeling cold and alone. She crawled under her sheets and curled up. She tried to fight the tears in her eyes. It was not like Shego had died, she had just changed. That was something that happened to people. Shego had changed before; she hadn't always been evil. Her becoming good again was a positive development. One less villain in the world was a good thing. It was wicked of her to wish it hadn't happened.

It was better for her, too. Shego had been clear she wouldn't have ever dated her while she was still a villain. She wasn't someone she could have built a relationship with. With this new, good Shego it was at least a possibility, even if she was currently reluctant to entertain the notion. Shego might be her teacher for now, but she'd be out of school in a handful of months.

Did she want a relationship with her? She'd been mostly focused on getting Shego in her bed so far. But she liked spending time with her. She liked talking to her and just hanging out. That counted for something, right? She'd never done anything like that with the old Shego, so she didn't really have a point of comparison, but surely she liked this nice Shego even more than the bad, dangerous, sexy Shego. Kim imagined Shego—the real Shego—pinning her down, her words echoing in her mind. "I could just throw you against the wall and have my way with you." She swallowed hard.

Kim groaned and buried her face in her pillow. She liked the new Shego. She wanted the old Shego. But that Shego was gone, and she had already decided that was a good thing. She should concentrate on what she had, or rather, what she didn't have. She could figure out her feelings towards Shego in time, but it hardly mattered if the woman didn't even want to be with her. The first step was to convince Shego to date her. Then she'd know if it worked out or not.

Kim thought her mind was made up, but sleep was long coming.

The breakfast was a little awkward with Shego squeezed against Kim to fit at the table. Kim found it pleasant enough, but her parents and Shego were still tense around each other. Kim's brothers were already over the novelty of her, and didn't pester her with questions the way they had the first morning Shego had stayed with them. Kim enjoyed the sensation of Shego pressed against her arm while halfheartedly listening to her parents' usual morning talk.

"So, what do you have on schedule for today, honey?"

"A usual day, really. Too much administrative work. One rather interesting glioma. Oh, and I'm meeting a specialist for a consultation about Ms. Go's brain scans."

Kim perked up. "Do you think they'll be able to help?"

"I wouldn't get my hopes up; we have some pretty smart people at our department, and none of us know what to make of it. But I'll let you know tonight."

"I'm grateful for all the effort you've put into trying to help my brothers, Dr. Possible."

"Well, we haven't really been able to make any progress, but you're welcome. I'm afraid this will be up to you, Kim."

"Yeah, I was afraid of that. Wade and I are trying to track down Electronique. Then I just have to figure out how to get that machine from her."

"It won't be easy. Electronique was never a pushover."

"Perhaps she wasn't, but you didn't have my Kimmie-cub to help you back then."

"Dad, Team Go were superheroes."

"I'm sure they were, Kimmie, but you can still show them some things." His brows creased. "Hero things, I mean. Not anything else."

"I got it, dad."

"So, how goes the hunt for colleges? Have you made your choice yet?"

"I've been pretty preoccupied, dad."

"I understand you have a lot on your plate, Kim, but do make the time to get your applications sent. It's a very important step for your future."

"Your mother is right, Kimmie. If you need any help with them, just ask me."

"I might take you up on that." Kim pictured Shego leaning over her as she sat by her desk with the forms, Shego's perfume in her nostrils, her long hair falling on her shoulders and tickling her neck. She shook herself and concentrated on her breakfast before she got too worked up.

Following breakfast Kim and Shego got in the car and headed for school. It was a little earlier than Kim usually set off, but Shego wanted to make sure she made it in in good time.

"Is it okay if we pick up Ron on the way?" Kim didn't really want Ron around when she could be alone with Shego, but she felt guilty about neglecting him, especially with his scooter out of action.

"Is he going to school this early?"

"If he wants a ride, he can get up when the ride is there."

"Yes, of course you can pick him up, Kimmie."

Kim drove in silence for a while, trying to find a way to broach an awkward topic. "Uh, so... there's something I've been meaning to bring up, but there hasn't really been a good time..."

"Are you sure this is a good time?"

"Well, no, but... I mean, there might not be a better time anytime soon."

"I assume it's not a school matter."

"No, it's really not."

"Kim, if this is about us, I already told you that we can't be involved."

"Even if you are going to stay here, I'm not going to be a high school student much longer."

"Kim..."

"You enjoyed yesterday, right?"

"Yes, I did. It's been a long time since I've been able to just hang out with friends."

"Friends." Kim didn't mean for her voice to sound so bitter.

"Yes, friends."

"Anyway, I wanted to let you know I got tested and I don't have anything," Kim said airily. "What about you?"

"I... uh... I, I haven't really had time to... but that's good. It's good that... uh..."

Kim knew she shouldn't feel good about the way Shego was reduced to stuttered words and flushed cheeks, and she knew she shouldn't have just sprung that up on her like that, but she had wanted to make it clear that whatever their relationship was, just 'friends' didn't cover it.

"It is, but you'd better find the time to get tested before the next time, just in case."

"Kim..."

"I know, I know, you can't date a student. But you always say 'can't', not 'won't'. In a few months that won't be an issue anymore. I can wait that long." Although she'd prefer not to.

"Kimmie, it's not just that. We're in different places in our lives, and looking for different things. It would be better if you dated someone you had more in common with."

"And who would that be? There aren't many people who can keep up with me. You can."

"That's not me anymore. I'm out of that life."

"Don't tell me you don't miss the excitement."

"I don't. I just want a life for myself. A real life."

"My life is real."

"I know it is, I didn't mean to imply it wasn't. I remember how exciting it all was, when I was your age. But that was long ago, and I want to move on."

"You mean that, don't you? You really aren't... you really aren't her anymore."

"I am me. The real me, the me I was always supposed to be, if I hadn't lost my way somehow."

"But the Shego I knew is gone."

"It's better that way. She was not a good person."

They drove on in silence for a while.

"Do you think your brothers are gone?"

"We can bring them back. We will get that device and figure out how to reverse whatever it does."

"We will." Kim paused. "When we do, do you... do you think we should do that to you, too?"

"What? No! Why are you even suggesting that? Do you miss your enemy that much?"

"No, hear me out. Electronique changed all of you against your will. If we are going to change your brothers back, maybe we should do that to you, too. Shego... the original Shego, she didn't deserve it either."

"Then I'd be gone! I have every bit as much right to be here as she did. More so! I'm a good person, I can do so much good in the world she never would have done. She was evil."

"She wasn't all bad... I think much of her evil girl persona was just an act."

"I think you have an overtly romantic view of her. You didn't really know her. Trust me, I have the memories. I wish I didn't."

"You said you don't really understand her motivations, though. Maybe you view her too harshly?"

"She was a villain, Kim. Just because you... just because you found her attractive doesn't make her a good person."

"I find you attractive, too."

"Do you, really? I think you are still hung up on her, enough that you're thinking about... You don't even know me. The real me."

"Then give me a chance to get to know you."

"Kimmie..."

"I'm not asking you to date me." At least, not quite yet. "We can still do things together, right?"

"Well, we kinda have already."

"Yeah. So where's the harm? Is there something you'd like to do?"

"Well, I saw an ad for Upperton Museum of Modern Art yesterday, and the exhibit seemed interesting. I don't know if that's your kind of thing..."

"I like art. I'd totally go with you, if you want me to."

"It would be nice to have someone with me, and I don't really know many people here."

"Great! It's a d... uh, yeah, let's do that."

Kim and Shego drove on in uncomfortable silence. Kim felt like she had taken a step forward and two steps back. Did this new Shego really not see her as a romantic prospect? Kim felt queasy at the thought that this time things might not work out for her. She pushed the uneasiness down. She could still win Shego over. She could do anything.