AN: SO THIS CHAPTER IS REALLY DARK AND YOU JUST HAVE TO KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS STORY IS THE STORY OF A MAN PUSHED TO THE BRINK, AND HIS STORY OF THE EVENTS OF WHAT HAPPENS AFTERWARD.

AN: I KNOW THAT ITS DARK AND I KNOW THAT ITS A LITTLE FAR FETCHED BUT JUST BARE WITH ME ON THIS ONE.

AN: I DON'T OWN CHUCK BUT I WISH I DID

9 Years Without You

By CharmingCharles2896

Chapter 12: The Lose of Innocence

7:00 A.M.

The Old Warehouse, Outskirts of Mong Pan Burma

2 Days Later

It was a rainy day, how fitting for the occasion. Chuck and Casey had arrived at The Old Warehouse the site of the original BLACKSPARROW where Sarah had been taken the first time. This place was pure evil, it made Chuck uncomfortable as he and Casey slowly made there way through the maze of hallways and rooms. Chuck turned the corner and walked into a massive room. Off in the distance stood The Masked Man and his ten henchmen, Sarah was the first one to see Chuck and Casey.

"Chuck!" Sarah yelled desperately towards Chuck. Chuck and Casey were now standing mere yards from The Masked Man and his men when Chuck spoke.

"We had a deal, hand her over." The Masked Man let go of Sarah's Arm thus releasing her, Sarah ran into Chuck'./≥/s arms wrapping him in a tender embrace. Chuck kissed Sarah tenderly trying to convey all of his love for her, tears ran down his cheeks as he broke the kiss. He touched his forehead to hers as he whispered.

"I love you Sarah so, so much. I'm sorry." With that he pulled away from Sarah and walked over to The Masked Man.

"I'm ready to go." Chuck looked down at the floor as The Masked Mans goons grabbed him and lead him away.

"Chuck! No! Chuck!" Sarah screamed out after him, Sarah tried with all her might to shake free.

"I'm so sorry Sarah please forgive me." Yelled Chuck as Sarah broke free from Casey's grasp and ran after Chuck. Just then Chuck felt the prick of a tranq dart in his neck.

"Do it." Said The Masked Man as he pointed his head at Sarah. The crack of a gunshot shook Chuck out of his daze as he saw the growing blood spot on Sarah's chest.

"No! you bastard!" yelled Chuck as Casey ran towards Sarah's limp body. Another gunshot and Casey fell to the floor a bullet having passed through his chest. Everything started to go fuzzy as the feeling of a massive weight descended onto Chuck's chest. his breathing becoming more and more labored, Chuck fought the impending darkness with all his might but to no avail as he passed out finally giving in to his fate, finally giving in to the toxin currently coursing through his veins. The thud of the plane touching down shook Chuck from his nightmare.

7:00 A.M.

Outskirts of Mong Pan Burma

Chuck looked around frantically trying to get a barring on where he was. Chucks breathing was coming in short erratic breaths, the adrenaline still pumping through his veins.

"Where am I?" said Chuck with a raspy voice. Casey walked in from the rear of the plane.
"Oh hey your up, we just landed in Burma so get your stuff ready."

XXXXXXXXXX

7:00 P.M.

The Hotel, Mong Pan, Burma

Chuck took in an unsteady breath as he tried to calm his nerves. It was a surreal feeling really, knowing your going to die today. He was scared, not because he was going to die. He was at peace with that, he was okay knowing that Sarah will get to live a long happy life even though he wont be in. No he was scared for Sarah and the rest of his family that he loved so dearly, if this deal went down then there would be nobody to stop The Masked Man if he went after Chuck's family. Thinking back a couple of days to that day when he thought that Sarah left he could help remember the analogy that he made. He had finally met his Bain the one that would take him to the brink. But unlike Bruce Wayne he wasn't going to survive this one. He wasn't going to win this time, he was going to die a slow painful death. The time to make the exchange was quickly approaching and Chuck was writing his last words to Sarah. Casey walked into the room dressed in full tactical equipment carrying a G36 Assault Rifle.

"Okay Chuck it's uh… it's show time, time to go get her." Casey gave a sad look at Chuck. Chuck was a sight for sore eyes to say the least. He hadn't slept in days, whiskers starting to form having not shaven. Dark spots had formed under his eyes from lack of sleep. Chuck put down the pen having finished writing the letter, folded the note and placed it in his coat pocket. Chuck took an unsteady breath as he got up out of the chair.

"Okay I'm ready lets go."

As the black van sped down the highway, the rain drops splattering on the windshield Chuck couldn't help but think to all the things that he had done. He took down FULCRUM, The Ring, Volkoff Industries, Shaw. He had saved America more times then he could count but it all felt hollow. Look at all of the things he hadn't done, no kids, no stable marriage, be able to provide for his family without having to worry, he had failed everybody. He had failed to protect his family and now Sarah was in danger, he had failed to keep her safe and now he was going to pay the ultimate sacrifice for it. It wasn't fair, all of his life he had said that not fully understanding what it was like for life to truly be unfair. First his parents then the intersect, then things started to turn around. He married Sarah, started Carmichael Industries, he was living the good life. Then Quinn messed it all up, no more memories meant no more Sarah, she ran after only a year. Then his downward spiral started. If it hadn't been for Ellie at that exact moment he would have blown his head off. Then Sarah returned and everything turned around. Life wasn't fair, every time Chuck got his hands on something positive the fates took it away from him. Sarah loved him and there was nothing he could do about it, she loved him to death yet any chance for them to explore that love had vanished without a trace. Everyone new that the news of Chucks death would crush Sarah, having to live with such guilt seemed like an impossible task for some even as strong as Sarah. As the van pulled to a stop about 500 yards from a massive warehouse Chuck clenched his hands together and spoke one final prayer before exiting the van.

"Casey give me a pistol I have a bad feeling about this, like something's off." Casey stopped in his tracks and stared at Chuck.

"Are you sure Chuck? Just remember if this goes bad you better be prepared to pull that trigger." Chuck simply nodded yes as Casey handed him the Sig Sauer P229 Pistol. Chuck tucked the pistol into the waistline of his pants.

This place reminded Chuck of what he thought hell would be like, the place was dark and eerily quiet the only sound was there footsteps. Chuck and Casey turned the corner and proceeded down a long dark hallway. Chuck and Casey were walking when Casey suddenly stopped in front of a dark room a sad blank stare on his face as he slowly swallowed and walked into the dark room. Chuck flipped on the light switch inside the room and the lights came on revealing a table with four restraints on it, two on one end of the table the others on the adjacent legs of said table.

"What is this place?" asked a horrified Chuck. Casey walked further into the room closer to the table the sad face still present. Casey put his hand to the table feeling the rough wood that the table had been constructed from. Casey couldn't take his eyes off the blood stains.

"I found her here." Casey said as he pointed to the table. "I found Sarah here." Casey's eyes had by now become misty as tears built up in his eyes. He wouldn't cry, he couldn't, not now.

"She was so thin when I found her, so helpless. She had been beaten beyond recognition. I still remember what she said to me… BLACKSPARROW." Chuck sniffled a bit as Casey told Chuck the heartbreaking story.

"It broke my heart to see the once invincible Agent Sarah Walker so broken and weak. She was so malnourished that she couldn't even stand up, she didn't have the energy. I carried her out of this hellhole. When I looked into her eyes, those deep pools of sapphire all I saw was fear and sadness. Regardless of weather this deal goes down or not, I will kill this man. I can promise you that much I will kill him for what he did to you and Sarah." The determination on Chuck's face really inspired confidence within Chuck.

"Casey make me one promise." Casey looked at Chuck.

"Anything." Chuck walked up to Casey and placed his hand on Casey's shoulder.

"Look out for her when I'm gone." Casey simply nodded as they both proceeded back down the hallway.

It was dark, ominously dark. Chuck and Casey found themselves in a big open expansive room with pillars on both sides, casting large shadows on the room projecting an ominous look on the room. There was a sudden flash of movement in the corner of the room causing Chuck's spy sense to kick into high gear. Chuck drew the gun from his waist.

"Hey Casey something's up were not alone here." Casey started to look around the room also sensing something.

"I'm sorry chuck but this deal isn't going to happen, we've walked into a trap." Chuck stopped in his tracks and looked at Casey.

"Yeah your right we need to bale before…" the sound of gunshots interrupted Chuck's train of thought. Both Chuck and Casey ran to hide behind the pillars while trying to get a grip on the situation.

"Casey can you see them?" Casey peeked his head around the pillar he was behind only to be followed by bullets whizzing by him. From what Casey could tell there were four gunman currently firing at them, each one was hiding behind a pillar laying down fire at them.

"Chuck we gotta get out of this position or this is going to turn into a giant cluster fuck really fast. Have one of my smoke grenades." Casey tossed Chuck the smoke grenade canister.

"On three we both toss them at the gunman then run over to the pillars on there side of the room, we need to turn the tables on them. Once you're over there start taking them out. On three, One Two Three." Both Chuck and Casey threw the grenades then sprinted over to the other side of the massive room. Chuck immediately flashed on hand to hand combat and leaped at the attackers. Two attackers ran at Chuck, the first one threw a ran hand jab at Chucks face, Chuck grabbed the mans wrist and practically threw him out of the way while extending his leg to kick the other attacker in the face. Chuck was still holding onto the first attacker and now threw his own left hand jab at the him, the punch connected and you could here the cracking of his jaw bone. The man reeled backwards allowing chuck time to set up his next attack, Chuck threw a right handed uppercut followed quickly by a left to the ribs. Casey kicked with his right foot, connecting with the attackers chest effectively knocking the wind out of his stomach. A quick elbow to the head and the attack fell unconscious. The fourth attacker jumped out at Casey, who responded by shooting the man in the chest.

"Damn I'm getting to old for this shit." Said Casey as he struggled to regain his breath. Chuck threw and open palmed jab at the first attackers nose breaking it with a load pop the man fell unconscious. The second attacker stood up having finally recovered from the kick and attacked Chuck rapping him in a head lock. Chuck threw his elbow backwards quickly making contact with the mans stomach. Chuck ducked and grabbed the mans head flipping him forward over Chucks head and onto the floor. The air rushed out of his chest as he hit he floor, Chuck took the time to regain his footing and wait for the ill prepared attacker to make his next move. The man stood up and assumed a fighting stance, a load gunshot rang out and the attacker fell into a heap dead. Chuck looked over his shoulder at Casey.

"Thanks." Casey looked at the unconscious man on the ground next to Chuck.

"Is he dead?" Casey pointed at the man. Chuck simply nodded no. Casey aimed his assault rifle at the man and fire, killing him instantly.

"He is now. Hey you want to kill this one guy over here? You know some catharsis threw violence." Chuck was adamantly shook his no.

"No I want to get some answers from him first." Just then the man started to stir, Casey walked over to the man and kicked him in the head knocking him out once again.

"Casey grab him and when he wakes up again just use a twilight dart we need him to be awake and alert." Casey simply shrugged as he grabbed the limp body of the attacker.

"Why don't we lock him inside the room where you found Sarah that way we can tie him up and leave him there till morning." Casey nodded as they both traveled to the room. After tying the man up they both left in need of a drink and time to think this over.

Casey and Chuck were sitting inside a local bar sipping on bud lights thinking.

"So Casey I think I'm going to question him tomorrow alone. I want to do this my way." Casey stopped drinking his beer and looked at Chuck like he was crazy.

"No way Chuck, in order to get answers from him you'll have to do some pretty terrible things and I don't want you to have to do that. Believe me you're not the same afterwards." Casey had a point Chuck was afraid that he might change if he did those things and Sarah wouldn't want anything to do with him if she heard of what he did.

"You right Casey I'll ask questions and if he doesn't talk you can just beat them out of him." Casey nodded in agreement.

XXXXXXXXXX

12:58 P.M.

BLACKSPARROW holding cell

Later that same day

Sarah was scared honestly scared, they hadn't raped her yet but they had roughed her up quite a bit. She was currently lying against the wall inside the cell she was being held in. She hadn't been able to stop crying since they had told her about the successful ambush of Chuck Bartowski and Colonel John Casey. He was dead, there was nobody left to save her. She was alone and there was nobody left to come find her. Nobody knew were she was and nobody would ever find out. She couldn't even fathom the pain that Ellie must be feeling now that her brother was dead. Sarah sobbed in silence the glow of the moonlight cascading into the room from the window. She had no bed to sleep on just a floor, and usually she was chained up to the wall but there was the one guard. He was merely a teenager but you could tell that he was in over his head. At night the one guard would come in without permission and unchain all but one of her legs so that she cold sleep on the floor instead of stand. He could speak English well enough that he could communicate with her. He told her that he felt bad for her, such a beautiful woman didn't deserve such torture. He tried to get her food any night that he could, they didn't feed her much. He told her that The Masked Man had special plans for Chuck and that he was truly sorry for her lose when he heard about Chuck. He was just a kid in a bad situation, he was an American that was clear from the skin tone he had. Sarah was distracted from her thoughts by the sound of the door opening, the guard walked in holding some bread and coffee.

"Hello Sarah, I'm sorry about your husband. I got you some bread and coffee, it was all that I could find." He quickly unlatched both of her arms and a leg leaving the other leg still chained up. He handed her the bread and coffee and sat against the other wall.

"I'm so sorry that my dad is doing this to you… again." Sarah choked on the coffee when he said that.

"What did you say? Did you just say that Ivan Jameson A.K.A. The Masked Man is your father?" he nodded yes.

"I'm David Jameson." Sarah swallowed slowly her face showing fear.

"No, no it's fine I'm nothing like him. Not even close I'm just working a job until I can go back to the states. I have some new information for you." Sarah perked up at the mention of information.

"So I've now been informed that the ambush wasn't successful, your husband is still alive and so is his friend. Also I've decided that if they try to break you out I'll let you go. My dad is crazy and I think it's wrong for him to keep you here. I'll only do that if they come for you though. I can't just help bust you out of here that's crazy, I'll die you'll get caught." Sarah was elated to say the least.

"Really?" if he was being truthful then this was some of the best news she had heard in more than a week.

"Yes, but I wouldn't be able to do it alone, we'd get caught so if they come for you I'll help get you out. I'm sorry but I have to go back out into the hall now I'll be back in thirty minutes to get rid of anything you don't eat so hurry up and eat." With that the guard waved goodbye then stepped out into the hall. Sarah wolfed down the bread and the coffee then set the cup out and waited for David to come back.

Thirty minutes later exactly David walked back in slowly and quietly. He picked up the cup and the little scrap of bread. Sarah looked at him with a genuine smile. She was terrified beyond belief of everybody else but he made her feel somewhat safe in this terrible situation she was in.

"Hey David will you come over here please." He looked a little hesitant.

"Come on I don't bite, I just want to give you something." He looked a little confused but came closer.

"Now David just bare with me on this okay." He nodded. Sarah smiled before grabbing onto his shoulders and pulled him into a kiss, David was shocked to say the least. When she broke the kiss, he had the most shocked look on his face.

"What was that for?" she simply smiled.

"That was simply a thank you for all that you have done for me while I've been in here. Good night David and once again thank you for everything." he had a very dazed look on his face as he walked out into the hall. Sarah settled into a comfortable position and settled in for the night.

XXXXXXXXXX

10:00 A.M.

The Old Warehouse

The Next Day

Chuck slammed the door shut waking his captive.

"Rise and shine, we got a big day today. I've got questions and you've got answers, so lets get this over with. Okay?" the man looked up at Chuck, still strapped to the table. The man shrugged and looked away.

"I'm not going to tell you shit so Fuck off." Chuck spun around and looked at the pathetic man.

"Oh but you will tell me everything that I want to know." Chuck walked closer to the man.

"Now why would I tell you anything?" That made Chuck very angry. Chuck grabbed the mans face and turned his head so that Chuck could speak into his ear.

"No you're going to talk because you left my strapped to this table for five damn months you pathetic excuse for a human being." Suddenly a light bulb went off in the man s head, this was Chuck Bartowski he was talking to. That meant that his wife was Sarah Walker, it was time to mess with this Chuck guy, a slimy smile crept onto his face.
"I have to hand it to you Chuck you sure have great taste in women." He laughed maniacally as Chuck turned to look at him a look of rage on his face.

"She is simply ravishing Chuck. Probably the best fuck I've ever had. It's always better when they scream and struggle against you, it adds a little excitement to everything. she was so scared and so tight it was great. The way she screamed out BLACKSPARROW over and over. It really gets you going." He laughed again as Chuck paced in the room fuming. He had made it personal. Long gone was the thought of letting this man live, no this man needed to pay and Chuck was going to make him pay. He'd get the answers Chuck was looking for, yes he'd get answers alright. Chuck Bartowski was now in the back of his mind, Charles Carmichael was the one doing the walking and talking now and Carmichael wanted revenge. Chuck would carve this asshole up if he had to but the man would talk, Everybody talks.

"You'll pay for what you said buddy, I promise you that I'll make the next day of you life as painful a possible." Chuck gave him a sinister smile then walked back out into the hallway.

"I'll be back Casey." Said Chuck over his shoulder as he walked down the hallway.

"Where are you going?" shouted Casey trying to figure out what as going on.

"Shopping, I have to get some things from town… don't talk to are little friend." With that Chuck was gone leaving Casey to wonder what happened inside that room. Chuck had said not to talk to him so Casey would just have to wait and find out later.

XXXXXXXXXX

10:00 P.M.

Slam! The door closed with a thunderous boom. It was dark now except for the light. The man was strapped to a chair now his limbs secured by zip ties, his hands still secured to the table while his ankles were secured to the legs of the chair. He had a look of freight on his face from the sudden sound. Chuck set down a large blanket rolled up over some this on the table and looked into the scared mans eyes.

"Ready to talk yet?" the man spit at Chuck, Chuck wiped the spit off of his face.

"Not smart my friend." Chuck unrolled the blanket revealing a pair of plier's a hammer, various knives, a crowbar, and a power drill. Chuck put a small box down on the table, after opening the box Chuck pulled out a small syringe and a bottle.

"Now this is Pentahydroxone an experimental neurotoxin designed by the CIA especially to amplify pain in every nerve in your body so that your body feels like it's on fire, figuratively of coarse, So getting your finger nail pulled out hurts really, really, really, really bad. You following me so far? You wouldn't believe what I had to go threw to get some of this."

Chuck laughed maniacally as he injected the toxin into the frightened mans neck.

"Now that will kick in, in a couple of seconds so until then I should probably tell you that it last for about twelve hours and It keeps you from passing out so don't even think about trying anything, and I have an entire bottle so I can do this all day. Oh yeah I forgot to tell you that it also makes your hearing hypersensitive, SO WHEN I TALK LIKE THIS!" the man shrieked out in pain struggling against his restraints, the toxin sending pain signals to his brain.

"It hurts like hell. Now I'm going to ask you questions and your going to get three strikes, if you don't answer my question after three strikes you get pain. Lots of pain." Chuck grabbed a knife and looked.

"Where is The Masked Man holding my wife?" Chuck looked at the ma waiting for an answer.

"Piss off."

"Strike one."

"Go to hell."

"Strike two." Chuck put down the knife and grabbed the hammer.

"Your going to have to hurt me cause I'm not talking."

"Okay." Chuck swung the hammer, hitting the mans hand breaking the bones with a blood curdling pop. He shrieked in pain as the hammer made contact with his hand.

"I'll ask you again but this time you only get one strikes. Where is my wife!" Chuck was sinking deeper and deeper and he new before long he was going to lose himself but he had to do what was necessary to get Sarah back.

"Shit, no I ain't telling you shit."

"Strike one. Where is my wife?" Chuck was disgusted with himself but he didn't care he was going to make this man pay for what he did.

"Just remember Chuck two years ago when I was screwing your wife all she kept saying was save me Chuck, save me Chuck." He laughed loudly. "I bet she is saying that right now, save me Chuck, save me Chuck. Now the question is." He got really quiet as if to ponder what to say next.

"Is she really worth saving?" he laughed again mockingly as Chuck tightened his grip on the hammer. Chuck was determined to get this man to talk what ever it took.

"Okay have it your way." Chuck swung low under the table, the hammer making contact with the mans knee breaking it with an audible crunch. The man once again shrieked out in pain.

"Ahhh stop it." The man was desperate to make the pain stop but he couldn't tell this lunatic anything.

"You can make the pain stop, all you have to do is answer the question. Where is my wife?" the man nodded no trying to suppress a cry as the hammer made contact with his other knee, it was no use as he cried out the pain over coming him, he wanted to pass out everything felt like it was on fire. Chuck walked back over to the table and put down the now bloody hammer and grabbed the power drill pulling the trigger to add dramatic effect.

"Ready to talk yet?"

"Okay I'll talk just please stop hurting me." Chuck looked at him the hatred in his eyes.

"Oh yes you'll talk." Chuck pulled the trigger and moved the drill bit ever closer.

"Please, please don't, please stop." Tears ran down the mans cheeks as he begged Chuck for mercy. Chuck stopped moving the drill just before it touch the mans hand.

"The question is though when my wife begged you to stop… did you?" Casey could hear the screams through the door, Chuck left the drill there for a couple seconds before withdrawing it from the mans hand the drill bit dripping blood onto the table. Charles Carmichael was in full control and the rage within was telling him to finish the job.

"Talk now or it will only get worse." The man nodded yes then spoke in an uneasy tone.

"He is keeping her in an cell at the hospital in town. The hospital is a front for his nefarious deeds merely a shell for his operation in the back of the building. You'll never be able to get her back, place is a fortress. But hey look at it this way you can watch this time as they have their way with her, like your own private performance." Chuck pulled out the gun from the waist of his pants and pointed it at the man.

"No please, please don't. please don't." Chuck looked the man in the eye. He was quickly approaching the point of no return the point where he completely lost himself.

"Did you?" Chuck emptied the magazine into the mans chest, blood splattering all over Chuck. He had crossed the point of no return, simple as that. Chuck opened the door only to face Casey.

"Did you kill him?" asked a shocked Casey. Chuck seemed to think about it before answering.

"Yes I did and it felt great. I'm going to take a walk down town so I'll see you later." With that Chuck walked down the hallway.

"Casey call Gertrude send the jet to pick her up we are going to need all the help we can get." Said Chuck as he continued to walk down the hallway, dropping the smoking gun in stride. Chuck had said that he would do what ever it took to get Sarah back and he just proved it as Casey walked into the room to look at the horror show Chuck left behind. Chuck had left all right, Casey hoped that when Chuck came back that he actually came back Chuck and not the cold calculated Chuck that Casey had just seen. Even if this colder Chuck did get Sarah back he new she wouldn't like the Chuck that she would see. But what other option was there if cold Chuck was able to get her back? Casey and Sarah would just have to help Chuck deal with what he had just done and hope that Chuck came through.

As Chuck walked outside into the cold night air he could fight the sick feeling inside his stomach any longer. Chuck bent over and emptied the contents of his stomach. What had he done? He just killed man in cold blood. After torturing said dead guy. Chuck felt disgusted with himself, he had betrayed all of his morals and done thing far beyond reproach. Once Sarah found out about what he had done she wouldn't want anything to do with him, they had done this dance before. Sarah couldn't stand the site of him when she thought he killed that man for his red test he did nothing that time, but now he had brutally tortured and killed a guy in cold blood. No she could never know. This was one thing that would never be spoken of again. As Chuck walked back down the road and into town all he could think about was her, where she was, how she was doing. But he had to push those thoughts into the back of his mind and focus in the mission at hand, he needed to scope this place out before they did anything drastic. He'd investigate tonight and in a couple of days when Gertrud was here they go get her. But until then Chuck Bartowski had to let Charles Carmichael do the talking.

AN: NOW I KNOW I'M GOING TO GET ALOT OF FLACK FOR THIS CHAPTER BUT THE END IS NEAR FOR THIS STORY SO BUCKLE UP ITS GOING TO BE A BUMPY RIDE.

AN: DEFINITELY 1 MORE CHAPTER BUT I'M THINK ABOUT DOING AN EPILOGUE AFTER THAT SO BE WARNED :D