Of Love and War and One-Eyed Witches

The weeks into December passed in a blur of stalking and rushed last-minute homework assignments. James was still shadowing Lily, but it was now second priority behind finding out what Snape was up to. Sirius had also taken up 'Snape Stalking', as Remus liked to call it, and he assumed that was where the dark-haired Marauders were now.

Remus himself was sat in the Great Hall. It was snowing heavily as Christmas approached, so the hall was opened to students between mealtimes as a study space. Remus was trying to explain the principle exceptions to Gamp's Laws of Elemental Transfiguration, for the hundredth time, to Peter. Dorcas was sat opposite them, pointedly ignoring her potions essay in favour of giggling at Remus' efforts.

' … Unless you've already got something to transfigure, It just isn't going to work. You could always summon something, instead.'

' So I can't magic up cake from nowhere?' Peter asked again.

' No,' Remus replied, as calmly as he could. Dorcas snorted into her hand.

' That's a shame. What about…'

Fortunately for Remus' sanity, Peter didn't get to ask the same cycle of three questions again for a different foodstuff. A very deflated looking James suddenly appeared from under his invisibility cloak right behind Peter, making the smaller boy squeal in surprise.

' Ah, James,' Dorcas said, seemingly oblivious to the boy appearing from thin air right in front of her. ' Maybe you can help Pete understand that he can't just magic up food.'

James merely grunted, sinking into his seat. Sirius joined them, not looking nearly as agitated, and answering Dorcas' plea.

' Don't worry about it, Pete, just go to the kitchens.'

' I suppose,' he said, crestfallen. Then he pointed to James and asked, ' What's up with him?'

' Lost Snivellus. Again,' He explained.

' You don't seem terribly bothered by it,' Remus observed.

Sirius just shrugged. ' Getting a bit dull. We've been following the slime ball for over a month…'

' And nothing!' James wailed, throwing his hands in the air dramatically and then letting them slap back into his lap.

Remus was rather glad of this development. Sirius had developed a habit of hexing Snape at ever opportunity, and was becoming increasingly cruel. Remus suspected this was the eldest marauders reaction to Snapes new shadow - Regulus, Sirius' little brother. This, Remus could almost understand. Unfortunately, James had also adopted the same attitude of unnecessary cruelty, without much of a reason.

It was only a matter of time, Remus knew, when you followed someone so closely, before you discovered something you really didn't need to know.

He opened his mouth to say 'good', but was beaten to it. By Peter, of all people.

' Good. You've been horrid to him lately, for no good reason. It's not like he's done anything.'

Remus frowned, feeling more than a little ashamed that Peter had said something while he sat there silent. Peter, who was neither a prefect, nor a person particularly comfortable with criticising Padfoot and Prongs.

Well done, Remus, he thought. So much for that Gryffindor bravery.

Sirius and James were both glaring at Peter with a bizarre mixture of being impressed he had spoken against them, and appalled at the suggestion that there was such a thing as too cruel when it came to Snape.

' He's right,' Dorcas said, before either boy could recover enough to speak. ' Not to mention how boring you two are at the moment.'

' Boring!' James shouted, all other concerns forgotten.

' Yeah,' she said simply, not looking up from her essay, which she was suddenly pouring over.

' Us?' he reiterated, gesturing to himself and Sirius for emphasis. ' Boring?'

' No,' She deadpanned. ' The other James Potter and Sirius Black at Hogwarts, spending more time staring at slimy little Slytherins than, say, Marauding.'

It was strange hearing someone else use James name for it, but it seemed to trigger something.

' Well, Prongs, we can't be letting the side down, can we?'

' Certainly not, Padfoot,' James concluded.

They headed out of the Hall, whispering conspiringly. Dorcas bit her lip in her effort to keep her expression impassive, and Remus noticed Peters mouth twitching at the corners.

' What have you done?' he asked, raising his eyebrow at them.

' Nothing,' Dorcas insisted, but she couldn't keep the tremor of suppressed laughter from her voice.

Remus turned to Peter, who wasn't managing nearly as well. He was sniggering, despite biting down on the inside of his cheek, and his eyes were watering. Remus gave him a pointed look, and gestured for him to say something. He shook his head, though, and then covered his face with his hands.

' Come on, then,' Dorcas said, stuffing her books into her bag and standing. ' We don't want to miss it.'

Remus sighed, grabbing his own work as Peter pulled him up. He was dragged to the entrance hall where a crowd was gathering, already shouting and cheering and heckling. It was a familiar sound this close to Christmas, and Remus groaned.

' Tell me you didn't?'

Peter only gave a sheepish little shrug, so Dorcas replied.

' Not particularly original, but it's seasonal. And it should provoke a reaction, retaliation. Then things will get interesting.'

As they moved further into the Hall, the two black-haired boys came into view on the second floor moving staircase. As predicted, hovering above them - and shouting loudly - was a ridiculously inflated piece of mistletoe.

Remus could see that the boys were talking, but he couldn't hear them over the clamouring students. He didn't really need to, if he was honest. He could read their movements well enough after four years of mischief.

Sirius was grinning. His eyes flickered from the plant above them to the crowd below. C'mon Prongs, we've got an audience. Can't disappoint.

James quickly scanned the nearest faces, looking worried, then back at Sirius, brow furrowed. What if Evans sees?

Sirius' eyebrows shot up his forehead, disappearing into his fringe. Like she's never seen it before.

Remus knew Sirius would be thinking of the House-wide game of Truth or Dare in the third year, when Lily's friends Mary had issued the order herself. Though there were several other instances where the boys had been caught in compromising positions, much to Peter and Remus' amusement.

James strugged for a minute, probably thinking the same things. He glanced around the room once more, then grinned at his best friend. Oh, go on then. Seeing as how you can't resist me.

Sirius smirked wickedly. If we're going to do this, we're going to make it good.

James rolled his eyes, smirked back and gave a little nod. Of course we are, We're Marauders!

Then the pair turned to the crowd, and the renewed cheers and cat-calls, and took a bow.

' Oh God,' Remus mumbled to himself, then turned to Dorcas. ' I hope you're happy.'

She shrugged, grinning, the cheered with the rest of the student-body as the boys on the balcony drew together.

If there had been any doubt about Remus Lupins ability to read his friends, it was gone now. When Sirius Black went for something, he really went for it.

To everyone in the hall it would look like an incredibly passionate kiss. They had their hands entwined in each others hair, eyes closed tightly and were showing no inclination that this wasn't perfectly commonplace in the privacy of their dorm.

Remus knew though. He knew they each held the other boys neck to stop either one from backing out once they'd started. He knew they were both grinning like idiots, biting back laughter as the crowd reacted. And he knew hey weren't looking at each other because, even in the most innocent of situations, that usually led to unrestrained fits of spontaneous giggles.

In fact, the one thing Remus couldn't rationalise was the rather excessive amount of tongue involved.

The cheers continued for several more minutes, amongst some disconcerting cries of 'we knew it' and 'about time', until several teachers were attracted by the noise. A highly amused Knox and a twinkle-eyed Dumbledore dispersed the gathered students, while a red-faced McGonagall hurriedly shrank the screaming shrub back to it's original size and dispelled the enchantment giving it a voice.

A very flustered lecture followed, during which both boys continuously giggled at their Head of House's unusual embarrassment, before she gave it up as a bad job and stalked away mumbling to herself about the stress of it all.

Remus fought his way through the stragglers in the hall, up the stairs to where his roommates had been standing. When he finally got up to the third floor, he found only a very amused looking Sirius.

' Where's Prongs got to now?' He asked, not sure he wanted the answer.

' Spotted Snivelly slinking off to the dungeons while everyone was enjoying the show.'

' You know, Padfoot. One of these days he's going to regret this,' Remus groaned.

' Come off it, Moony. What harm could possible come of a bit of friendly stalking?'

Remus didn't get chance to answer that painfully open question. A shout echoed up from the dungeons staircase, followed by the distinctive bang and fizzle of a spell rebounding off something solid. Remus managed to scan the Hall for teachers, finding it mercifully empty, before the shouting came closer.

Sirius leaned over the banister and swore loudly before turning to point at Remus and saying sternly, ' Don't.'

Remus took it as fair warning, and bit back his comment, when he too peered down and saw the figures of James and Snape edging up the stairs in duelling stance, wands trained on each other.

Then something completely unexpected happened. Lily Evans also immerged from the dungeons, arms flailing about as her high voice joined the boys shouts. Sirius darted down the stairs to help James, cursing as he went. Remus stepped out of view.

He felt like a coward, but he didn't have a choice.

He could step up and help his friends, as loyalty dictated, and be landed in detention for the rest of the year with them, stripped of all privileges. Or he could take the prefects stance and help Lily put his friends in detention, something they would make his life hellish for. Or he could leave now, and pretend this never happened.

He hadn't realised he was still moving backwards until he felt the cool stone against his back. He turned to see the statue of Gunhilda of Gorsemoor, a witch with one-eye and a humpback. He could hear the shouting on the stairs drawing nearer, including Lily's increasingly high pitch, and made the decision unconsciously.

He slid behind the statue and, finding himself in near-complete darkness, cast a muttered lumos. The space was bigger than it should have been, hidden behind a statue as it was. Remus crouched down, hoping it made him less visible.

As the light shifted he caught sight of a strangely shaped shadow on stone. On closer examination he found a tiny carving of a word. Holding his wand up to make it out, he muttered aloud, ' Dissendium.'

Much to his surprise, the witches hump slid open to reveal a dark passageway. It was small, but he was fairly certain he'd be able to squeeze through it.

Not that you want to, the Prefect in him scolded.

Bollocks I don't, the Marauder replied.

Before he could act on either, though, the shouting was suddenly right on top of him. He peered round the statue and saw Sirius backing down the corridor, James just in front. He distinctly heard Lily cry something that sounded remarkably like, ' That's it. I'm getting a teacher.'

' Bugger,' Remus muttered to himself, before poking his head round the statue once more and calling in a hushed voice, ' Oi, Pads. Padfoot!'

' Moony?' the boy called back. ' You hiding, you coward! Where's that Gryffindor spirit?'

' Shut up, you idiot. Distract Snape and get Prongs over here, quick.'

The boy did as he was asked, casting several spells that ended in loud bangs and lots of smoke, then dragging James down the corridor. When they were near enough, Remus grabbed them and pulled them into the nook. Both boys gaped at the hole, visibly startled.

' Don't just stare at it,' Remus urged, pushing James forward. ' Get in.'

The skinny boy did so without protest or difficulty, and Remus gestured for Sirius to do the same.

' Don't think so Moons,' he said, shoving the smaller boy towards the statue. ' Don't want you backing out last minute. In you go.'

Remus caught the sound of nearing footsteps and didn't hesitate, throwing himself down what turned out to be a bit like a stone slide. He landed hard on the soft earth and scrambled to his feet just in time to avoid being landed on by Sirius, who gracefully stepped into the tunnel.

' Wow,' James said, lifting his wand to cast light as wide as was possible in the small space. ' Where do you think it goes?'

' I'll find out,' Sirius said, stepping forward and transforming into the familiar black dog. He barked excitedly, then bounded down the tunnel at breakneck pace.

' Sometimes I think he's a bit too eager to do that,' Remus noted.

James snorted in agreement. ' He makes a better dog than he does a person. All that slobber.'

He mock shuddered, and Remus laughed. ' You didn't have to kiss him.'

' Hm. But that wouldn't have been any fun at all. Who was it?'

' Pete and Cassy. They're spending a lot of time together lately. Speaking of which, what did you go to the dungeons for?'

James' face darkened, like he was trying to suppress a terrible trauma. ' I saw Evans go down there. With him.'

' Well yeah,' Remus replied softly, trying not to upset the messy-haired boy. ' They are friends.'

' You knew about this?' James shouted. Clearly he had failed.

' Yeah. They meet in the library a lot. You never noticed, Prongs? In five years, you've never noticed?'

James struggled with this for a long moment, seemingly bothered by his lack of knowledge on the girl he was trying to win. Remus waited for the yelling to continue, as it surely would.

Before James gathered his bearings, though, the huge shaggy black dog leapt out of the shadows and bowled Remus over. It licked his face enthusiastically a few times, then turned back into grinning boy.

' You, Messer Moony, are a genius! Fucking brilliant! I take back everything I ever said against you.' Then he looked up at a bewildered looking James and explained, ' It leads to Honeydukes. The Cellar!'

James jaw literally dropped, all thoughts of Snape and Lily gone. His eyes lit up as the cogs in his head worked furiously to decide the best use of this knowledge.

Sirius , who was still perched in Remus' stomach, grabbed the werewolf's face and planted a sloppy, wet kiss on his forehead. Then he jumped up and started plotting with James.

Remus blinked, still on the ground. He felt his cheeks burning, and told himself the flush was one of pride - he had after all, found this passage that was getting his fellows so excited.

It was not an entirely convincing argument.

Wow, this chapter is long. Hope you enjoyed it. Probably not the kiss you were expecting, but there you are. Hah hah! I like to tease.

Seriously though, I think this couple are perfect together, and you don't get that without being really good friends first. Hence all the build up. I promise you, the romance is coming. It's just running a bit late.

Thank you for reading, Reviews make me smile. Danke!