Despite her resolve, Marian's heart was turning over...performing somersaults...singing! And she was smiling...giggling, even! And all because of him!

She had tried, and had actually succeeded, in showing him he meant nothing at all to her. When she'd overheard there would be an unguarded cart of silver travelling through the forest, she'd tried to do her part and alert Robin, dressing herself carefully, hiding her ugly cropped hair under the hood on her peach colored shirt. At the last moment, she'd put on the necklace Gisbourne had forced upon her, for reasons she wouldn't admit to herself. After all, she didn't care if Robin became jealous or not. He meant nothing to her.

Of course, it had backfired. He'd jumped out again at her, this time actually spilling her off Vesper's back, and he'd been cocky and arrogant, charming and snide, and breathtakingly handsome, staring right into her, trying to read her thoughts. And she'd been so angry and distracted, she had left, without even mentioning the unguarded cart.

There was nothing in Heaven and Earth that would induce her to go back, and tell him. And so, she resolved to intercept the cart herself, as the Nightwatchman.

Except, just as she was about to leave to do so, more base-born misfits from Robin's gang, new ones, proving he'd take anyone, except of course herself when she'd hinted she wanted to join him, had attempted to rob her house and had wounded her father! Adrenaline rushing, she'd fought them off, saving her father, and their home. Robin had arrived, late as usual, giving her the chance to tell him about the cart, so she could stay at home and care for her father. She thought she'd never forgive his audacity at laughing at her for even planning to steal the cart herself.

But it seemed she had forgiven him...forgiven him far too much. He'd appeared today in broad daylight, under her window, whistling for her the way he used to, looking as carefree as the young Lord Locksley who had wooed and won her heart. Years and troubles seemed to melt away, but what really moved her was the realization he had come because he did need her. He'd come to unburden his heart, and seek her advice; not because he needed her to be his spy, but because he needed her.

He valued her, and her judgment. They connected again, and she'd given him a tiny grain of encouragement, enough, apparently, for him to close his eyes and open his mouth to reach for her lips. Her heart had leaped and she'd giggled, for he'd looked like a fish reaching for the bait on a fishhook, or a baby bird struggling to find the nourishment in its mother's mouth.

She remembered all too well what would happen if she succumbed. One kiss would lead to twenty, turning their brains to mush and igniting their bodies. "That won't help you make good decisions," she'd told him.

"It might!"

"It won't!"

And he'd sighed heavily, and she'd giggled. Giggled! Who was the fool now?

She didn't care. It felt wonderful to laugh and smile again. Maybe Robin was right. Maybe it was brave and heroic to fight for happiness, as long as it wasn't selfishly driven.

But, no. It was selfishness, she realized. Robin, she had no doubt, would try to rescue those men, even if he claimed they didn't belong to his gang. And by doing so, he would throw himself, and Much and Will, and the other three she didn't care for, in grave danger.

Marian sighed, finding all her short-lived glorious joy gone. Robin couldn't die, especially not now, when she was suspecting he truly did care for her, after all. That was a selfish thought, she realized, but it didn't matter. She wanted him to know she cared for him, perhaps even more than she ever had. Yes, even more! But mostly, she wanted him to remain safe.

She wouldn't stop him from doing what his conscience told him to do. That really would be selfish! But she'd do all she could to continue helping him, and even, somehow, let him know her heart no longer needed to be cold.