Even to the Best of Us

Much to Minerva McGonagall's exasperation, James Potter was not an idiot. At least, not in the intellectual sense of the word.

Sure, James could be a bit reckless - though, thankfully, not as much as a certain disowned member of the Black family - and a bit childish - almost on par with a giddy Peter on Sugar-high, at times - and more than a bit mischievous - and never as good at hiding it as Moony - but he was not generally stupid.

He had, of course, done some fairly stupid things in his time. Almost every prank he and Sirius had ever pulled involving a bathroom had been a drastic mistake and nearly always ended soggy-ly and stinky-ly and extremely regretfully. Somehow, they always managed to forget that the next time they decided to flood the dungeons, though.

It was also fairly stupid of him, when he looked back on it, to have spent the whole of fourth and fifth year hexing Snivellus in front of the lovely Lily-flower, who was one of the only people on the planet who could stand the greasy bastard. He would still hex him, of course, but more discreetly now and when Lily was decidedly absent.

James had also, once, made the very stupid mistake of swearing in front of his mother. While Arianne was so thrilled to have been blessed with James at a much later point in her life than intended and was therefore very doting and forgiving of him, she was also a rather old-fashioned type of woman. And she did not tolerate cursing in her house. It was the only time James had ever been smacked, by either of his parents, and it was not an experience he cared to repeat.

He had been called stupid by a fair number of the staff at Hogwarts, too. He knew none of them really meant it - little Fillius Flatwick never did manage to hide his smiles completely, and everyone knew McGooglies had a soft spot the size of Mongolia for the Marauders - and, really, how could they, when James and Sirius achieved straight Os in everything and Remus wasn't far behind. They even managed to drag Peter up a few grades in Transfiguration, though there wasn't much hope for him in Herbology.

No, James Potter was most certainly not stupid. And, as such, he did not miss the sudden changes in two of his best friends.

He didn't know what to make of it, at all. Not the foggiest. Sometimes it was such little things that he convinced himself he was imagining it all, anyway, and that there was nothing different about them in the least. But other times it was so strikingly obvious that he couldn't keep up the pretence. He was curious, he'd readily admit, and a little bit nosy. He also felt annoyingly left out, and that wouldn't do at all.

November began in an incredibly drizzly haze that was more suited to April than anything else, but quickly dissolved into full on winter frosts. By mid-month the snow was thick around the castle, and the surrounding mountains could hardly be made out amongst the all-consuming whiteness.

James awoke on one such frosty morning to find Remus already up, fully dressed in his uniform and robes, sitting on the end of his bed. He was smiling, and when James turned to grope for his glasses he knew why. Sirius' face appeared, close enough to be perfectly in focus, plastered with that shit-eating grin of his. James realised his ear was wet and cold, and that Sirius had been blowing air at it to aggravate the damp skin, and swiped at the side of his head irritably.

' Urgh,' James managed, shoving his best mate away and dragging himself up. ' I hate it when you're such a good mood in the mornings. It's sinful. Blasphemy. And it almost always means you're going to get us in trouble today.'

That wasn't strictly true. This time last year, yes; it would've meant Padtfoot had a good mischief-making idea in the night and was ready to share it with the rest of the school population. But lately it was a more frequent occurrence, and those mornings no longer coincided with mischievous afternoons.

' No idea what you mean, Bambi.'

He bounded across the room, more like his canine counterpart than a teenage boy, and ducked behind a mildly amused looking Remus before James could even groan at the Disney reference.

' Sorry,' the werewolf said, not sounding even remotely apologetic. ' But we're going to be late if you don't get up, and Padfoot volunteered to help.'

' Of course he did,' James grumbled, grabbing at the nearest set of robes. ' Help! Hah! Suppose you let me sleep through breakfast, too?'

' You so very rarely sleep in, we thought we'd allow you the indulgence.'

' So kind of you. Now I'm going to starve while Raison drones on at us.'

' On the bright side,' Sirius said, disgustingly cheerfully, ' you can't vomit at the sight of Snivellus if you've nothing in you to begin with.'

' Every cloud…' Remus added, not quite managing to stop the corner of his mouth from twitching upwards.

James felt stupidly ganged up on. It was daft, he knew, because how many times had he and Sirius done exactly the same thing to the others? Only it was much more annoying on this end of the exchange. He almost felt like he should find Peter and apologise to him for all those occasions when he thought Pete was just being a bit too slow to follow a plan properly. That said, he felt the need to enlighten Sirius to this fact.

' I like that,' he flicked his fingers between them, ' a lot more when we do it, Pads.'

' Err… Do what, mate?' Sirius asked slowly, sounding a little distressed. Remus looked highly entertained by the suggestion, though James couldn't fathom what was so humorous.

' That, y'know, talking between words and the being in on a private joke nobody else gets. It's actually really annoying.'

' Oh,' Sirius said, looking almost relieved. ' No worries, Prongs, there's no joke. Marauder's honour.'

Despite Sirius' claim, the pair continued to be very giggly all the way down to the DADA classroom. The teacher this year was Professor Raison - an extremely tall, extremely thin man who walked with his knees constantly bent slightly. In his black robes he reminded James of a spider, moving around jerkily and warily but confidently. He was also the most boring live professor in the whole castle, with a reedy, whispering voice that could rival that of Binn's and a firm belief in textbook study over practical demonstrations.

The class was almost intolerable after the energetic teaching of Professor Knox the year before, and James was even more put out when Sirius switched seats with Peter at the beginning of the class.

James resolutely spent the rest of the day sulking. Sirius had never not sat with him before, with the exception of The Prank and it's aftermath when he didn't sit with anyone. James felt abandoned.

Even in Muggle Studies, which Remus - having a muggle mother - didn't take, James was in such a strop he barely spoke to Sirius anyway. Not even Professor Milles, with her cheery disposition and enchanting Welsh accent, could rouse him from his downer.

He knew, in the back of his mind, that he was being melodramatic. He was acting every inch the angsty teenager, blowing it out of proportion and skulking about like it was someone else job to fix the problem.

But he couldn't help it. Sirius and he had always been the team, the pair of fools, the brothers in everything but blood. Now, it seemed, James wasn't wanted anymore. Obviously the canine bond exceeded six years of solid best-friendship.

He was in a very bitter, spiteful mood when he slumped into a chair to one side of the common room that evening, alone. Sirius and Remus had disappeared again, and Peter had his gobstones club. James felt used. He knew he shouldn't - being a good friend was important to all your mates, not just the best one - but he couldn't stop the thoughts flittering in his head.

It wasn't Remus who put him up this summer, was it? It wasn't Remus pretending not to hear Sirius' whimpering in his sleep, not bringing up the nightmares for fear of upsetting him further. It wasn't Remus who spent two months thinking of new ways to distract him, keep him busy so he didn't vanish for hours and re-emerge with unexplained cuts and bruises.

James didn't know how long he was slumped there with a face like thunder before he was stirred from his thoughts.

' What's the matter with you? I haven't even rejected you yet today.'

Some distant part of James' brain recognised the harmonious voice of one Lily Evans and jumped for joy at the thought of her willingly talking to him. Unfortunatly, this part was distinctly disconnected to the larger, more bitter section of grey matter, and completely missed it's chance to say something smart, witty or cute.

' Fuck off, Evans.'

Smooth.

' Well,' she huffed, putting her hands on her gorgeous hips in a clear effort to look affronted, but she didn't leave. ' I was only seeing if you were alright.'

' You haven't cared if I was alright for six years, have you? And it's none of your damn business anyway. So, if you'd kindly piss off.'

He pretty face visibly fell into a deep frown. She was almost pouting, and at any other time James would've kissed her there and then, and quite happily spent the night in the hospital wing dealing with the consequences.

' I was trying to be nice. Clearly a concept you struggle with. You can be a right nasty pasty sometimes, Potter.'

' I'll nasty your pasty, Evans,' came the reply in a familiar voice.

Lily didn't even bother with a retort. Having looked past James to find Sirius wearing his best lewd look, she turned on her heel and stomped away muttering words like incorrigible and immature. James didn't look up as Sirius plonked himself down on the chair arm.

' What's up, then?' he asked.

' Nothing,' James answered immediately.

' Right,' Sirius said, in a voice that clearly stated his disbelief. ' You've got a face like a smacked arse and you've barely said two words to me all day.'

' So? Doesn't mean anything.'

' You just told Evans to fuck off, Prongs.'

James couldn't really argue with that one. He had, indeed, told Lily to fuck off. Oh God. But while he couldn't deny that fact, he was a far cry away from admitting his mounting feeling of rejection.

He settled for asking, in what he hoped was a neutral voice, ' Where's Moony?'

Clearly he failed as undisguised realisation flitted across Sirius' face. James supposed it was a mark of their friendship that Sirius didn't laugh or scoff or even acknowledge the revelation that he - James Potter - was, in fact, jealous.

' Library,' Sirius dutifully answered the question. ' Never could stand to sit in there, myself. Far too quiet.'

' Yeah,' James agreed, deciding the best way to show he was thankful was to cheer up a bit. ' And with Pince stalking around like a great, ugly vulture.'

' Hmm. And it isn't the same pretending to study without you peering stalkerishly through bookshelves at certain unmentionable red-heads.'

' No idea what you're talking about,' James hastily denied, before they both laughed.

It was nice, after the miserable brooding day he'd had, and James felt absolutely daft for even considering that Sirius could have replaced him. He was irreplaceable!

But he still wasn't stupid, and something was still different about his best mates.

After what it'd cost him today, he resolved to get to the bottom of it if it killed him. Then he groaned and burried his head in his hands.

' I told Lily Sex-on-legs Evans to fuck off! Oh, Pads, what have I done?'

I am so ridiculously apologetic for the update gap words cannot suffice. I'm sorry! I really am. But real life got in the way, and the longer I wasn't writing the more I worried I wouldn't be able to get back into it properly. But I did, and here you are.

A massive thanks to everyone who reviewed! 116! Wahey! Also, my implicit gratitude to CryptoSquirrel, and a massive tirade of messages/alerts/favs/reviews that guilted me into writing again. Thank you!

With regard to some reviews - Firstly, thanks to the people who pointed out errors. I don't have a beta, and spellchecker does miss errors so long as they're real words. I proof read all chapters before I post them, but I'm not perfect. I will try to get them fixed. Secondly, someone mentioned The Shoebox Project. I haven't actually read it - I know, Blasphemy! - so I don't know if this story being considered similar is a compliment or a criticism, so Thanks and apologies, I guess.

Anyway, the chapter, yes. Decided to have a moody, teenage James for once. I've read plenty of stories where Sirius is jealous of James and Lily but none the other way around, interestingly enough. Why wouldn't James get a bit annoyed by his friends being suddenly secretive? And Harry did have some very angsty misunderstood moments, I figure he had to get that penchant for melodrama from somewhere. I also figure James isn't the type to hold a grudge, either, so hurray for short-lived misery!

I have most of the next chapter written already, so it'll be up in a few days. It's another Peter chapter, by the by. Make of it what you will.

Anywho! I have rambled quite enough now, Thank you for reading, reviews make me smile, Danke schoen!