A/N: Hey everyone! I am still alive and trying my hardest to get on this story once again. I am so sorry for the delay, but as I explained to my sisters (who are reading this story as well) this story has taken on a mind of it's own and the chapters that I have hand written are changing on me when I type them up. This is causing it to take long to type them up than normal. I have gotten this chapter up after much battle with it and I hope that everyone enjoys it and knows that I will try to get the next one up within the week. Please, as always leave me your feedback and let me know what you think.
Warning, this chapter doesn't begin out the happiest, just so you guys know and won't yell at me for it later.
Chapter 11:
Absence
It was a quiet on the way back to Kaede's, the loss of Kagome's laughter and banter very noticeable to the group that had grown so used to it. Rin held Shippou close to her on Ah Un though he didn't seem to notice anything around him, his eyes were red but blank, and his tears had run out. Kohaku sat behind Rin, his own tears held at bay as he watched Jaken steer the dragon next to its master. Sango and Miroku sat silently on Kilala, his arms holding her possessively as if he thought she would be taken away as well. She leaned into him as tears leaked down her face even though she tried to wipe them away they kept coming and eventually she gave up and closed her eyes. Kilala let out a pitiful cry as she felt the distress of her mistress as well as the loss of the one person who had been especially nice to her when no one else knew too.
Inuyasha ran silently next to them his ears plastered to his head and his whole face screaming out how devastated he was. He glanced over at his seemingly unmoved brother, but looking closer he saw the turmoil in his eyes at the death of this one miko and he knew then that he had inadvertently taken away something that had made even the great Sesshomaru care for. His eyes traveled down to the still and lifeless face of the one he had failed and the words that Sesshomaru had spoken to him earlier reverberated through his mind enhancing his failure.
"I will carry Kagome; you do not deserve to carry the one you have failed and so thoroughly betrayed."
Pulling his eyes away from her face he looked forward to see that they were nearing the village and only then did it sink in that Kaede and Kagome's family didn't know what had happened to her. His heart sunk further when he thought that he would be the only one able to tell her family that he had a hand in killing her and he knew that the one place that he could call home was going to be lost to him.
Kaede knew something was wrong, she could feel it in the air, and even though she didn't have the power her sister once did she could still sense when the group she had come to see as her children came into her range. Wiping the remnants of herbs and poultice from her hands she stood slowly before making her way outside to wait for their return.
Standing in front of her hut she could feel the despair in the air and she prayed to anyone listening that it wasn't what she thought it was. As the sun began to set she could see specks on the horizon and she knew that they were almost back; it wouldn't take them long to reach her because as she watched they grew closer and closer.
She didn't even bat an eye when she saw Sesshomaru and his band with the others; it was what he held so gently in his arms that caused her knees to almost buckle under the weight that now lay on her heart.
"Please, no," she whispered but when Sesshomaru stopped in front of her and caught her eye, she knew that the girl she called her own in her mind was lost to them. Looking down she saw the pale and peaceful face of Kagome and the tears tracks that ran down her sallow cheeks before her eye traveled down to the wound that took her life away. She looked away quickly, sickened by the damage she saw and knowing that nothing could have been done to save her with the destruction that was before her.
She stepped out of the way to let Sesshomaru into the hut and directed him to put her on a pallet in the next room. She watched as he gently laid her on the pallet his hand lingering on her face as he pushed some hair from her cheeks and Kaede knew in the bottom of her heart that Sesshomaru could have come to love their Kagome like she deserved if the chance hadn't been taken from her. Standing, he turned and nodded his head to her before he made his way out of the hut to disappear into the forest surrounding them. It was his appearance and actions that made her feel sorry for him, the fact that he had lingered in the room or the fact that he had let her blood stain his normally pristine clothing showed how much this was affecting him.
Taking one last look at the girl she would be proud to call her daughter, she left the room to take care of the living and to find out what had happened.
It was hours later that everyone had settled down into the hut and around the fire reflecting on Kagome and all that she had done for the group. Shippou had slipped silently into the room where she lay ignoring everyone who tried to call him back, he did though, glance back and the emptiness they saw in his eyes caused them to leave him be for the time being. Inuyasha had left the hut to sit outside; the scent of death being too much for him as well as the knowledge that it was his fault that she was dead.
Sango turned to look at Miroku, the one that had stayed quiet through everything and saw him staring blankly at his hand.
"Miroku, are you alright?" She whispered and cringed at the wrongness that question left in her mouth.
"The bond, it's gone," he whispered as he raised devastated eyes to meet her own.
"The bond?" She questioned wondering what he was talking about.
"The bond that Kagome initiated with me when she healed my hand; I've lost a connection I've never had with anyone else; she was as close to me as a sibling would have been. We could communicate through it when we needed to and because of that she knew all of me as I knew all of her; it's all gone now. She's really gone," he whispered brokenly as his eyes traveled back to his hand before they glanced over to the darkened room where he knew her to lay.
Sango felt her heart break a little more at the loss she could hear in his voice and without a thought she drew him into her arms, tucking his head under her chin. His arms slowly came to embrace her waist as he buried his head into her shoulder and let the tears he had held back flow freely, letting some of the grief out before it consumed him. She lay her cheek on his hair and let her own tears go for the moment knowing words were not needed; only the comfort they could give each other was.
Rin stayed near Kohaku and Kilala clutching the backpack that Kagome had given her absently, once in a while glancing to the room where Shippou had disappeared into. She wanted to comfort him, but knew that it would be no use, he was lost for now and only he could bring himself back from his grief. She knew this because she had gone through it with her own parents, even though she couldn't remember a lot about them now, she remembered how it felt when they had been taken away.
Standing, she made her way out of the hut to see that Sesshomaru had taken a seat next to the door and that he still hadn't washed out Kagome's blood from his shirt. She ignored it as she climbed into his lap and wrapped her arms around his waist, the backpack tucked against her side.
"I miss her too Sesshomaru-sama," she whispered and smiled sadly when she felt his own arms come to rest around her before he nudged her head under his chin. She knew that this loss was one that he would be feeling for a long time since she had watched him grow to care for the girl she knew she could have come to call her mother as Shippou did. Burying her head closer to his chest she let her tears go and felt his arms tighten in response to her sorrow; she knew he didn't like the smell of her tears, but she also knew that he would allow it this one time.
Inuyasha watched the interaction from the roof and once again felt a searing guilt within his chest at what his actions had caused to happen. He turned his attention back to the moon and saw that it was waning once again and with a jolt he realized that he wouldn't have her with him on the new moon to distract him from his situation. Sorrow ate at him as he sat there and when he could take it no longer he jumped off the roof landing near his half-brother, they shared a brief look and both nodding at each other Inuyasha took off heading to the woods to grieve in private.
Sesshomaru watched his only kin go, knowing that he was going to hunt to relieve his grief as he, himself had done earlier. Looking back to the young girl in his arms, he held her closer and promised to himself that he would not let the same fate befall her; he would protect her with everything he had as she was the only one that knew the actual him now. Looking up to the waning moon he allowed himself a brief prayer for Kagome's soul before he shut away all those rampant emotions and became the stoic Sesshomaru that had never known Kagome's kindness.
Kaede watched from the small window of her hut as Inuyasha fled and Sesshomaru closed himself off once more; she wished to herself that things had turned out differently than what they were now, but she knew that nothing could have saved the young miko. Turning from the window she looked back into her hut to see the sleeping, almost peaceful faces of the ones she called her family and could only wonder what would happen now that Kagome, the heart of the group, was gone. Sighing, she shoved away those heavy thoughts and made to make herself some tea since she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep right away.
Shippou sat silently next to his dead mother, his eyes unblinking as he stared at her face trying to catch any trace of her breathing or life. He knew in his heart that she was dead and gone, but his mind would not let go of the thought that she was just sleeping or playing an awful joke on him that he would yell at her about later. His hand rested gently on one of her own as the other played with the hair that was splayed around her; he was so focused on her that he didn't catch the presence of another demon in the room until it was too close for his comfort. Looking up he saw a shadow drawing closer from the corner and with all the stress pressed upon him he snapped and eyes bleeding red he stood growling ferociously, ready to fight for the body of Kagome.
His energy swirled around him, angry red and black, signs of his rage and grief and as it swirled faster and faster you could hear the tearing of muscle and bone as he prepared to transform and it was these sounds that prompted the other demon to speak.
"Calm yourself little one, I came here not to harm you or your mother, but to try and save her; can you understand that?"
The energy stilled for a moment before receding back into his body where it became dormant once more; cautiously he eyed the shadowed demon before him wondering how they could save someone whose soul was gone.
"Who are you?" he whispered his hand tangling in his mother's hair to draw what comfort he could from her.
Stepping from the shadow he saw a woman with long silvery hair and markings, what drew his attention the most were the color of the eyes that seemed to stare into his soul. They were so green they seemed to glow in the dim light and it suddenly clicked with him who she was as his hand moved to rest on the necklace that Kagome had given him.
"Omnimaru," he breathed before relaxing slightly in the presence his mother had told him to trust.
"I am glad that she told you about me," pausing her attention shifted to the woman that lay still in death and for a moment her eyes glistened with tears before they were gone and she looked at him once more. "I may be able to save her; would you be willing to help me with this task?" Holding his eyes she saw the turmoil in them before they hardened in resolve.
"I will do anything to have her back, but how can you save her when her soul has left her?" He asked his eyes dimming as he spoke out loud his worries. He watched as she smiled and moved to kneel next to Kagome before her hand came to hover above the bottle that held the jewel shards; as he watched it began to glow a bright pink, but when he looked closer he noticed that it was mixed with a wispy blue and white that flowed through it.
"Her soul knew that she was going to die and so sought refuge in the one place that could house it and keep her undetected from everyone. She was meant to die this way so that she could be reborn into a stronger, more resilient body. I know this is hard to understand, but I've been given a vision on how to save her, but I need your help to do it. So I ask you one more time: are you willing to leave everyone here in order to bring your mother back?"
He didn't even deliberate on his answer before he nodded and stood straighter waiting on what she wanted and needed him to do.
"We have to leave here and go back to my hut, but I will need your help to leave a doll here that they can bury thinking that it's Kagome; can you do that?"
Shippou nodded solemnly before he pulled out a small wooden doll he had crafted after one of Naraku's golems, thinking that he would try to mimic his technique one day. Holding it in both hands he gathered as much energy as he could before he moved to lay it next to Kagome, his hands always staying above it as he channeled his power into the shape he wanted around it. He felt both his mother's and Omnimaru's power flowing around him and without any prompting he pulled on their energy as well to shape the golem they needed to pull off the switch. He closed his eyes, not needing to see her in order to replicate what she looked like in death, the image was seared into his mind and he knew it would not leave him ever.
When he opened his eyes he noticed that the only power he was still using was his own and he could only feel a sad pride that it had taken Kagome's death to bring out this power of his. With a final push he sealed the golem and stared down at the work that he had done and could only stare in wonder at what he had accomplished.
"Perfect Shippou, now all we have to do is put the necklace on your golem and only take one shard with us in order to keep her soul with her body." He nodded and gently transferred the shards over to the golem before he removed a shard and held it close to his heart.
"Alright Shippou, we have to leave now before anyone notices the fact that there is a barrier around this room; I will carry Kagome, will you ride on my shoulder?"
Nodding he waited until she was ready before he jumped up and in a flash they were out of the hut and in the woods; he wondered to himself how she managed that before he decided he didn't need to know right at this moment. He tried to hold back the hope that he felt because he knew that if it didn't work then he would be crushed and the hope he harbored would be destroyed.
Kaede sipped her tea silently before tensing a moment as the presence she felt in the next room seemed to vanish almost immediately. Standing as quickly as she could she made her way into the room that Kagome rested and where a moment before Shippou had been grieving in. Looking around she couldn't find him and worried she hurried outside to look for him, causing the others to stir in her wake. They sat up slowly wondering what was going on before Miroku stood to ask her telling the others that he would be back in a moment.
"What's wrong Kaede?"
"Shippou is missing; he's not with Kagome anymore and his presence seems to have just disappeared."
Now very awake, Miroku laid a hand on Kaede's shoulder before he turned and headed inside to tell the others what had happened and soon enough everyone was up and ready to search for the missing kit.
"Sesshomaru-sama, will you find Shippou-chan?" Rin asked as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes before taking the hand of Kaede knowing that they both would be staying at the hut in case Shippou came back.
"I will try Rin," he stated as he moved away from the group and delicately lifted his nose to the air in order to track his scent. Not finding it he growled slightly to himself before deciding that he needed to find his brother and see if he knew of any hiding places that the kit might have. Taking to the trees he listened as the others split to search and could only wonder to himself if the others would split up as well and then he wondered to himself why he had allowed himself and his group to stay for so long. Shaking his head clear he focused on finding Inuyasha and allowed a small amount of amazement to flicker through him at the ground his brother had covered and the devastation that he left in his wake.
"What do you want bastard? To rub my failings in more?" Inuyasha asked scathingly as he stood in the middle of a clearing the tattered, bloody remains of demons strewn about him.
"The kit has disappeared," was all he said and watched as Inuyasha spun around to look at him with wide, guilty eyes.
"How long ago?"
"Ten, maybe twenty minutes; this Sesshomaru can't find his scent and needed to know if you know of any hiding spots he may have."
"Yeah I do, let's go." Inuyasha took off back towards the village knowing that Sesshomaru would follow him easily.
They searched for hours for the kit and couldn't turn up anything; it was another blow to the group to have another one of their members gone and they could only wonder where he could have gone to.
"Shippou-chan will come back when he is ready," was all that was said about his disappearance by Rin as she went to sit with Kohaku her brave façade almost cracking when she saw his coloring books, untouched in the corner.
They made it to Omnimaru's hut quickly and without any hesitation she strode in before laying Kagome on a pallet in the middle of the room. She bustled about the room gathering things as Shippou situated himself by his mother's side, wondering what his part he would have to play in order to bring her back.
"Shippou, I want you to know that in order to bring her back she won't be human anymore."
"What do you mean?" Shippou asked once he got over being startled by the abrupt breaking of the silence between them.
"Her human body won't be able to survive if we were to put her soul back into her; she would just die again and we wouldn't be able to save her a second time. We have to change her body to that of a demon so that she could survive the wounds her body has sustained; do you understand now?"
"I get it, but how do we change her body?"
"I need to know, do you want her to be a fox demon? I'm going to ask for some of your hair and bit of your blood, this is what we will use to transform her body."
Shippou thought about it for a moment trying to figure out if this was the best thing for her and with a nod he turned hopeful eyes to her.
"Of course I do; then she could really be my mom!"
"Thought you would say that," she stated as she pulled out some jars and a knife to sit next to her. Motioning Shippou over to her she made him sit with his back to her as she raised the knife to cut some of his hair and put it into one of the jars that sat next to her. Next she had him turn around and hold out his hand, gently giving him the knife and telling him that he had to draw his own blood for it to work and to imagine what he wanted her to look like. Nodding his head to show that he understood, he held his hand above a bowl she placed near him and closed his eyes as he drew the knife across his palm. He didn't wince as it cut into him and his blood started to flow into the bowl; he thought about how he always imagined her as his mom and that she was extremely powerful and beautiful; the way that he had always seen her.
"Good Shippou that should be enough." Maru mumbled as her concentration was on the mixing of the ingredients she had with the blood and hair that Shippou had given her. Shippou watched as she made two separate concoctions and prayed to himself that it would work.
She had made a red colored paste and spread that on Kagomes wounds after she had cleaned them before lifting the cup she had full of blood and some other stuff that she had mixed in with it.
"I need you to hold her head up Shippou if you could," Maru whispered as she focused all her attention on the matter at hand.
He nodded and moved to hold her head up feeling the jewel shard he held grow warmer the closer the cup came to her lips. With a glance from Omnimaru, Shippou opened his mother's mouth and watched as she poured the liquid down her throat watching to see if it would really help her come back. He held back a yelp as the shard grew hot enough to cause pain before dropping it and watching as it floated above the ground, the glow surrounding it getting brighter. It rose into the air before moving to hover above her heart; in a movement far too fast for his eyes to catch it slammed into her chest making her rise slightly in the air.
Shippou tightened his hold on her but relaxed it when he caught a look from Omnimaru and he knew to trust what was happening.
"Don't worry Shippou, she will be able to remove it when she awakes; right now it is helping her soul meld back into her body and with repairing it as well."
Shippou nodded slightly as he laid her back down on the pallet before taking one of her hands in his and watching the glow spread from her chest to throughout her entire body. As he stared he saw the blue and white he had notice earlier leave the middle of her chest and move to encompass her entirely and he knew then that her soul was connecting back with her body. When the glow began to fade he heard a faint sound that he recognized almost instantly; her heartbeat.
"Thank you," he whispered as he cuddled up to her side an ear over her heart to make sure that it was real and not an illusion.
"No, thank you, without your help we wouldn't have been able to bring her back." Omnimaru stated as she sat back and let herself relax for a moment, knowing that her part was done; it was up to Kagome now as to when she would awaken and return to the world of the living.
A/N: There you go, I wouldn't kill her off without a reason! She's back, but will she be able to accept the changes that have come over her? Review and I will tell all! (But not right away! My muse would kill me, lol)