chapter four
x
"I'd do anything for her," Ty Lee explained.
She lingered in a living room with the Fire Lord. It was late morning and he was on a break, while she paced through the halls and tried to talk herself into returning to Azula. Her task was even more daunting than she imagined.
At Ty Lee's assertion of dedication to a total psychopath, Zuko cocked an eyebrow. He stared at her like she was the crazy one, and not Azula.
"Why? I don't think she'd do anything for you," Zuko replied. He now looked at her with pity in his eyes, which Ty Lee hated, but maybe she deserved it.
"Old habits die hard," whispered Ty Lee, her eyes averted, ashamed, uncertain.
Zuko tensed up at that word. He did not like it after it was used to justify turning down his proposal, but he was trying to get over the love of his life not loving him back. It was as hard as one would expect it to be.
"They do," he said. To be honest, he had many of them, and so did everyone around him. "She's a big one of yours, I guess?"
"Not her. She's a person, not a habit," Ty Lee said, which only rubbed salt in Zuko's wounds. "Craving her approval completely desperately with all of my heart is my bad habit."
Zuko had no words. He just knew that Azula was difficult to forget and dealing with her existence was harder. Not to mention her expertise in making people feel horrible guilty for destroying her mind and soul.
"Well, have you made any progress?" Zuko asked, already knowing the answer would be no.
"She poured tea on me! Which means she acknowledged that I was in the room!"
"That's more than I've ever gotten from her." Zuko did not want to kill Ty Lee's excitement by explaining how drastically fucked up her idea of progress was.
"It's depressing, and I know that you think that. Because it is. It is really, really, really, really, really, really, really depressing, but I have to start somewhere," sadly said Ty Lee. She already sounded defeated, but Zuko knew she would not give up that easily.
"I have to go to a thing."
Zuko excused himself before he could say a few nasty things about his very ill and broken sister, which would make him feel like a jerk.
Maybe he was a jerk; he was not too sure about that.
x
Ty Lee sat in Azula's room, on her floor, with her legs crossed and her head tilted to the right. She was on the verge of just turning upside down against the wall, but she was spilling her guts out and knew it would look ridiculous if she was doing a party trick at the same time.
"I don't love you but I'll always love you and I don't know how to really understand that," Ty Lee gushed, continuing her length rant about her confused feelings. "I don't even understand some really simple stuff. That's complicated, right? Are you ever going to talk to me again?" Ty Lee intently studied her hands. She felt foolish. "Is this not about me?"
Azula turned to face her ex and sighed. Ty Lee's eyes widened; she did not know what to make of Azula staring directly into her eyes with the expression of a disappointed and exasperated parent.
"Not everything is about you, Ty Lee, although I imagine that is difficult for you to swallow," Azula said, her voice hoarse from disuse, but scathing all the same.
Ty Lee jumped up. "I thought you weren't talking."
"I had nothing to say, until now," Azula replied, sitting straighter and assuming an air of importance that Ty Lee had forgotten. "I am very tired of hearing about your insecurities and desperate pleas for my attention, and can no longer bear it in silence."
Ty Lee was dumbfounded.
Azula hoped for that effect.
x
"Hi, Zuko." This could not be more awkward. It was probably the most uncomfortable conversation Mai ever had.
They were in the throne room and Zuko was not on his throne. That made it worse somehow. Perhaps it was because Mai had to see his face, and that was a dreadful feeling.
"Hi," he replied, swaying slightly on his feet. He looked like he did not want to be telling her whatever it was he had to say. "I wanted to talk to you about you talking to my father. I've been having sort of a problem."
"Well, I'm afraid my visits with your father are recreational and I don't think I can help with whatever problem it is," Mai said too quickly. She showed a little of her heart—if she had one—and that was a cause for alarm.
"I know you took the job offer," Zuko stated. He now sounded far more businesslike, which eased the discomfort. "I'm not stupid. I also know that two people were kidnapped and I want you to show him these notes and see if he can make sense of it."
"You think they were kidnapped by terrorists?" asked Mai.
Zuko shrugged. "That's what the note they left said."
Mai stared at him for some time. She wanted to say no, but she could not.
"I'll see what I can do," she replied as coldly as possible.
"You don't have to be cruel."
In earnest, Mai replied, "I'm not trying to be," on the way out of the door.
x
An hour later, Mai examined the papers Zuko gave her for the tenth time as she walked into the room. They were a huge stack of correspondence and smudged ink that added up to a whole lot of nothing. Despite combing through the dossier, she had no idea what any of it meant. No wonder Zuko was having so many problems finding that woman and her child.
Ozai looked up at his visitor. The guard to the right hastily grabbed a chair and set it down for Mai.
Not bad, she thought as she sat down.
"I have to talk to you about a kidnapping," Mai authoritatively said, crossing her legs and studying the deposed Fire Lord. "Or kidnappings. Two people but at one time, so I'm not sure if it's plural or not."
"I'll look." He extended a hand through the bars and she gave him the parchment. Ozai set it down before looking at it, of course. Mai knew nothing was easy when dealing with people like him or his children. "Tell me about your life."
Mai had no words.
He added, "I'm not asking. I won't even read these until you respond."
"I can't believe I'm even negotiating with you. My life? My life is boring. Staring at the walls in here would be significantly more interesting, but I guess you want me to bore you. Ty Lee is in town. She's trying to cure your daughter, which seems to be going terribly. I expected that outcome, but somehow she didn't. She likes to run back to Azula." Mai did not mean to say so much. She was supposed to be the one in control of this situation, not spilling out facts about her meaningless existence at the beck and call of a monster.
Ozai said, "Maybe she feels guilty and tries to overcompensate by talking about her constantly," and Mai rolled her eyes.
"I don't talk about her constantly," Mai coolly corrected, refusing to let him get to her. "You asked about my life and I told you."
"I expected you to reply with some scathing insult and refusal to indulge me. I didn't know I had to hear about your little friends." He seemed happy about it in a very sick way.
He and his daughter took great pride in playing with people like they were toys, and great pleasure in watching others hurt. Not that Mai was hurting, but he thought she was, and that was good enough.
"It's the only thing that's happened to me in a really long time," Mai said, turning up her palm. She played it off like it meant nothing, and it did to her.
Ozai laughed. "Your life is boring. I thought you were exaggerating because you lack perspective and any mature patience for the world around you."
"I'm leaving." Mai stood up and softly kicked her chair to the side.
"Without knowing about that kidnapper?" Ozai held up the papers, shaking them once.
"Honestly, I don't care about that mom and her kid," Mai replied. "I don't know them and I never will know them. I'm just playing along with this job for fun."
He laughed again and she held her breath. "Your life is even more boring than I thought."
"But I bet anything yours is worse, seeing as you're locked in a cell. I bet I'm the most interesting thing that will ever happen to you," replied Mai.
Ozai said nothing.
Mai did not leave, but she did not sit back down again either.
x
Meanwhile, Ty Lee sat down outside of Azula's door. She could not bring herself to go inside again, although she desperately wanted to. She wrung her hands and tried to hold back her tears.
Minutes later, Azula opened her door found her ex weeping on the floor. She stepped back and turned away because Ty Lee was not her problem. The circus freak came here of her own volition.
"I'm sorry," Ty Lee choked through a shroud of halfhearted sobs.
"Okay. When you came here to try to make me better, you made a choice, and, as with every choice, there were consequences. Your own inflated sense of self-important is not my problem. Now, I highly suggest that we just go our separate ways," Azula said, her voice still shaky. She must have been quiet for a very long time, and Ty Lee wanted to be flattered by it. "You can, of course, choose to stay and face those consequences, but I think they might be too much for you."
Ty Lee wiped her tears on her sleeve. She stared at the floor for a long time, and when she looked up, Azula was in bed.
Ty Lee said nothing.
Azula did not move, but she did not fall asleep either.