Chapter Four.

xxxxxxxxxx

Hermione stood in the middle of Diagon Alley clinging painfully tightly to Blaise's arm as her eyes refused to move away from the face of her former best friend. It was shocking to her how much it physically hurt to see Harry but feel unable to approach him. They had always had such an easy relationship. Harry had always known her better than anyone, at least until she had gotten lost in her own web of lies, and now to see him and feel like she couldn't talk to him... It really hurt.

As she watched, feeling her body start to shake and her eyes start to sting. Even though there were people rushing all around her, she could only focus her attention on Harry. She vaguely felt Blaise's arm encircle her shoulders and turn her to move her away, but before he could he was jerked suddenly away from here by a familiar, fuming red head.

"I see you've moved on to the next snake, eh 'Mione?" Ron snarled as she stumbled, barely being caught by Blaise who lunged towards her.

"Back off, Weasley." The italian snarled, holding Hermione by the waist, aware that she was struggling to hold herself up under the glare of her friend. "You don't know what you're talking about." He turned to Hermione, softening his features, "You okay, lovely?"

Hermione nodded shakily and turned to look at Ron, noticing that Harry was approaching from behind him. Harry looked nowhere near as angry as Ron, but she could tell that he was definitely uncomfotable with the confrontation that his best friend had started.

"Ron," Harry hissed, putting his hand on the red head's shoulder and trying to pull him back, "Ron, leave it."

"At least this one knows what you really look like, huh?" Ron snapped, jabbing his finger towards her, "Don't have to make yourself pretty for this one?"

"Back the fuck off, Weasley." Blaise growled, standing protectively in front of a silent Hermione. He could feel her shaking against his back. "Seriously, I'm warning you..."

"Or what, Zabini?" Ron snickered, "Feel like sticking up for the latest Slytherin slapper?"

Suddenly, Hermione was left alone in the middle of the street as Blaise threw himself towards Ron and had apparently caught the red head off guard, because she watched wide eyed as he pinned Ron to the wall with a hand pressed against his throat. The crowd around them had fallen silent and stopped what they were doing to watch as the attractive Italian stuck up for the Gryffindor princess against the two most famour Gryffindor's alive. It wasn't every day you saw people crossing such well defined house barriers.

Ron looked terrified, which wasn't surprising as Blaise was built like a truck. He had to look up to meet Ron's eyes, but he clearly overpowered her old friend and she was pleased that she had him to protect her. She shouldn't ever have needed a bodyguard, but she was glad to know that she was safe with him.

"Listen here, and listen good, Weasley." Blaise growled, inches from his face. "I would be less interested in what's between her legs and more in what's between yours. I have no interest in her except protecting her from bastards like you. Got it?"

Hermione watched as Ron's eyes widened even further at what Blaise had told him, clearly unaware that Blaise was more likely to find him attractive in that way than he ever did her. She heard a few of the people that had gathered around them gasp at his admission, too, and moved to stop him but he swung his hand out to halt her without so much as glancing at her.

"Unless you plan to apologise to Hermione for your despicable behaviour I never, and I do mean never, want to see you go anywhere near her again." He snarled, "She doesn't deserve to hear those kind of words from anyone, letalone someone who once claimed to be in love with her. Am I clear?"

Ron nodded weakly and attempted to pull away from Blaise but he increased the pressure of his hand around his throat, causing Ron to gasp for breath and his face to pale. Blaise repeated his question. Ron nodded.

"Crystal." He gasped.

Blaise released the red head's throat and Hermione watched as Ron bent double and gripped his knees, gasping for breath and glaring at her Italian friend. Blaise walked to her and draped his hand around her shoulders, turning to face the rest of the people who had congregated at the first sign of trouble. His gaze focused on Harry and Hermione saw her raven haired friend gulp as Blaise stared at him.

"Hermione..." Harry whispered, stepping nervously towards her, his eyes flicking to the man who was so protective of her, worried that he might be his next target. "I'll owl you, okay?"

Hermione couldn't find words to speak, but she nodded and smiled weakly at him. Hermione felt herself being turned and steered through the crowd but she was unseeing and unhearing, trying to discern how a day out with her friend had gone so wrong. It was just supposed to be a calm and happy shopping trip, but it had decended into madness quite rapidly.

xxxxxxxxxx

Harry was watching her as she glanced around the Three Broomsticks, where he had chosen for them to meet. She hadn't been able to meet his eye yet, but she could feel the intense heat of his stare in the side of her head. It hurt her, to feel this utterly terrified at the thought of being near him, but it had been so long since they had spoken that she really didn't know what to say. He had owled her a week ago, saying that they really needed to talk about everything. He'd also said that he missed her, which had been the main reason she had come today. She couldn't deny that she missed him too.

"I'm glad you came." Harry said quietly and she turned, nervously, to look at him.

"Are you?" She whispered and he nodded.

"I know I've been... Well I've not been the best." He muttered, "But I have missed you Hermione."

"I've missed you too." Hermione replied, turning her gaze down to the table and trying to stop her knee from bouncing with nerves.

She wanted him to start the deep conversation. He really needed to speak soon or she would get up from the table and walk away from him. Her nerves were shot, wondering what questions he would ask. She couldn't take it.

"Harry, why did you invite me here?" She asked, faking bravery that she definitely didn't feel and heard him sigh.

"I need to know... Why?" He grimaced. "Why him? Why did you lie to us all? Him included?"

"He made me feel... Something?" Hermione stammered, before sighing and dropping her head back in the booth. "Beautiful. He made me feel beautiful. And wanted, desired. Thing's I never expected to feel. I lied because... Ugh this is hard."

"It's alright, keep going." Harry said, softer than she had expected and she snapped her gaze onto him, seeing a gentle smile on his face. "I'm listening."

"I like because you wouldn't ever understand." She sighed, "I lied because I felt like I'd have to choose between you. I lied to him because I knew he could never love me like this." She pointed to herself. "I lied because I've been told my whole life how bloody average and plain I am and he didn't see me like that. No he didn't see Eloise like that. Me? I'm just the fucking swot that he despises."

And swiped away angry tears on her face and paused, trying to gather her thoughts. She was surprised when Harry offered his hand over the table and tentatively put hers into it. His fingers closed around hers and she choked around a sob.

"I lied because I felt like that was my only choice." She croaked and covered her face with her free hand, letting herself cry.

She felt the bench shift next to her and found herself being pulled into a familiar embrace. Laying her head against Harry's chest, sobbing as she inhaled his familiar scent and felt at home for the first time in months.

"If he can't love you as you are right now," Harry whispered into her hair, "Then he doesn't deserve you at all."

"Th- then why d- d- do I still miss h- h- him?" She sobbed.

Hermione broke down in the arms of her best friend.