Starring:
Jaime Chung as Mulan
Emilie de Ravin as Belle
Robert Carlyle as Mr. Gold/Rumplestiltskin
Sarah Bolger as Aurora
Jennifer Morrison as Emma Swan
Our heroines Mulan, Belle and Aurora are currently residing in a small suburban two story penthouse in the outskirt of Storybrooke. They have a few enjoyable hobbies, spending time with their boyfriend (on Belle's part), accidentally killing rabbits with gun powder (on Mulan's part), and demanding for jewelry from her ex-subjects (on Aurora's part), but none them have experience in Storybrooke activities, that is, until Emma Swan decided it was time for some girl bonding. So join our heroines, plus their good friend Emma, with Mr. Gold driving, as they go on their first shopping spree, and may they all come out alive.
"IT'S SHOPPING SPREE TIME BITCHES!"
"Gosh Emma, I don't know why you're so excited about this, it's just shopping."
"No, Aurora, you don't get it. Back in Boston the clothes are so freaking expensive, like, I had to save up three week salary to buy a shirt, but here, I just go into a store, be like, I saved your memories bitches, and they give me anything I want."
"So why are we here?"
"Well, you can't live on metal armour forever can you Mulan?"
"What? They perfectly comfortable!"
"You can barely sit down."
"I can so sit down."
"Nuh-uh."
"Yuh-huh. Watch me."
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…Okay point taken."
"Good, because we're here!"
"Finally!" THUMP!
"Did Rumple faint again?"
"Aurora? What do you mean did he faint again?"
"We went on a road trip a few weeks ago and he fainted then."
"Wow guys, thank you for inviting me."
"You're welcome."
"I was being sarcastic Belle."
"So was I."
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…ANYWAYS! ON TO SHOPPING BITCHES!"
"Why do you feel the need to say bitches after everything?"
"Gosh Mulan, everything sounds better with bitches."
"No it doesn't."
"Try it. Give me something totally un-awesome."
"Sleeping."
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…But you're SLEEPING beauty."
"I didn't agree to that name."
"Okay….Let's say it like this, WE'RE SLEEPING BITCHES!"
"Now I'm sleepy."
"Snap out of it AURORA!"
"I'M SORRY I CAN'T HELP IT!"
"Are we actually going to sh-op?"
"Sorry Belle, I was trying to make sure Aurora here doesn't drool."
"Well, Emma, I don't need your he-"
"Aurora?"
"…"
"Aurora?"
"…"
"AURORA!"
"She did not just fall asleep standing up."
"Hmm, I wonder if it's a side effect of the sleeping curse."
"Pretty sure it is, I've seen Snow done it before."
"Should we just leave her here?"
"Sure Mulan, let's leave Aurora here to no money and no way to contact us, it's not like she doesn't know the way to get home, oh wait, she doesn't even have a home."
"Wow Belle, I was just being sarcastic."
"You should work on your sarcastic voice."
"I agree with Belle, it sounded kind of liter-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."
"BOO-YAH BITCHES!"
"Why did you grab me?"
"I felt like it. You're right by the way Emma, everything sounds better with bitches."
"Umm, I just remembered something."
"Yes Belle?"
"Rumple is still unconscious."
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"Let's leave him here."
"Sarcasm?"
"No, I mean it."
"Sure."
"EMMA!"
"WHAT BELLE? I'M NOT HAVING MY SHOPPING TRIP RUINED BY A FAINTER."
"I agree with Emma, we're going forward."
"AURORA! YOU WERE MY FRIEND!"
"Bye-yah Belle."
"MULAN?"
"I really want to get out of this armour."
"Well, I'm going to stay here to look after him like a good girlfriend."
"BYE!"
IN THE MALL – 2 HOURS LATER
"This is cute right?"
"Aurora, that's a pantsuit."
"Well, Emma, I think with the right accessories I can really pull it off."
"I was thinking just the basic jean and t-shirt combo for now, and we'll buy the fancy wear another day."
"I am digging this shirt, what do you think Emma?"
"It has pineapples all across it Mulan."
"I like pineapples."
"You know who else likes pineapples?"
"Who Aurora?"
"Taylor Swift."
"Not this again."
"What?"
"She was talking about the road trip we had."
"I'm hearing a lot about this road trip, and I don't get it. Gosh, you miss one trip and you miss everything."
"Pretty much."
"What do you think of this shirt?"
"That's actually pretty good Aurora, I'm proud of you."
"Thank you Emma. I'll buy it-HOLY YAGOUI IT COST A LOT!"
"I think that's the bar code number…"
"What's a bar code number?"
"It's…never mind that's just not the price. Let's just check out and get out of there, alright?"
"OMG THERE IS A TOY STORE ACROSS THE MALL CAN WE GO EMMA PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!"
"I didn't know you're so into toys Mulan."
"OMG THERE IS A TOY DRAGON I WANT IT DO YOU HAVE 500 DOLLARS EMMA CAN I BORROW IT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!"
"Uh….no."
"FINE! JUST LEAVE ME HERE TO MY DOOM."
"So…so far we've lost Belle and Rumpel by the door, now Mulan to the toy store, guess it's just you and me Emma!"
"Sorry Aurora, but no way in the hell am I going to shop alone with you. I've got to go pick up a bag of cinnamon on the way home. Tell the other's I said it!"
RUNSAWAY!
"Emma?"
"…"
"Mulan?"
"…"
"Belle?"
'…"
"Rumpel?"
"…"
"I'M ALONE BITCHES!"
"…"
"That doesn't sound that good."
And that's the end of another adventure of the princesses. Poor Aurora, hope she has better luck next time…