[Angela]
I knew I was out cold.
I was so, so tired. In fact, all I could do was to keep my heart beating. To count the slow tired pumps as my heart worked to keep me alive. Where there was pain minutes ago was numbness. All I could hang on to was our daughter's round little face, scrunched up as she bawled. And yet, so beautiful. I grappled helplessly with the endless pit that I seemed to be dragged into.
Deeper and deeper…
I was never going to make it out alive, was I? Is my life really going to end so soon? A fullstop so quickly before the sentence was complete? No, I had so much more to do… How will Patrick possibly cope alone with two kids? No, I had to make it through. For our children. For Patrick… For myself…
I felt my heart give a last, tired ga-lump as it stopped moving all together. I could feel the little voice inside my head dying slowly as my brain lost its supply of fresh blood. No! I screamed silently. I can't die like this…
Though knowing everything I do now will probably fruitless, I refuse to give up hope. I gathered all the willpower from my already drowsy head and mentally pushed them to my heart. Beat, beat, come on, beat! I pleaded desperately. I could see a fatherly figure in front of me with a halo on his head. He smiled a assuring smile and stretched a hand out to me. "Come with me," he seemed to say. "Get rid of the hard work and painful memories forever. Come."
I knew, in a small part of my head, that I was dead. He was the angel god sent me to claim my soul. No! I screamed. I won't come with you! It's not my time. I won't leave my family behind. Go away!
Surprisingly he did. I suddenly felt my sagging body heave as my heart contracted and relaxed. I felt the welcoming wave of oxygenated blood rushing to my head, my limbs, all over my body. I gulped in a huge breath, gasping as the cold air rushed down my windpipe and filled my lungs.
This really happened. I was alive again.
I realized my hand was being gripped so tightly I knew who it was. I opened my eyes with great difficulty and gave a weak smile at Patrick, just before I saw his face growing larger and larger. Then his lips were on mine and there was nothing left to say.