Disclaimer: I don't own Left 4 Dead 2 or its characters. I only own my OCs.

A/N: Hi, everyone! Please accept my most sincere apologies for the lack of updates and writing progress. I've been stupidly busy over the past couple of weeks. My partner and I are adopting a new cat this week, and we've been preparing for that while I've been doing really long work days with virtually no breaks so I've just been too tired to write. Anyway, I'm actually only about three chapters away from completing the story I think, and then I'll be starting the sequel, which will be either completed or almost completed before I start to publish it so you're not kept waiting again. I hope you enjoy this chapter and thanks for sticking with me so far!

Shin Maxwell: First of all, no, that's totally not wrong of you to want Nick to give Kevin a beating. Nick probably wants to give the guy a beating too, but you may have to stay tuned for the sequel because Kevin may not appear until then. Anyway, thanks for reviewing and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Happy reading!

~ Not So Forsaken ~

- Chapter Twenty-Two -

Letting out a soft sigh, Julia tilted her head to the right, allowing Nick to lean further into her so that he could kiss the soft flesh of her throat.

They were under the covers again, in the dark this time, pressed close together in a tender embrace that Nick hadn't shared with another woman in a long time. They hadn't had sex, although Nick had wanted to. Julia wasn't ready, and after the emotional conversation they'd had about one of the darker moments in her recent past, he wasn't prepared to push the subject any further. Julia's warm, supple body was pressed against his, her face half buried in her pillow as he pressed more gentle kisses to her neck.

"I wish we could stay like this." She whispered, smiling as he retreated a little so that he could look at her again, "I don't wanna go back out there."

"I know, baby." He said softly, "Hopefully we won't have to leave this boat until we get to New Orleans."

He opened his arms to her as she made a move to cuddle up to him a little more, and as she settled against him, he felt her right hand start to gently stroke lines up and down his bare back. Wrapping her up in his arms, Nick tried to relax and let himself enjoy this contact with her. He still wasn't used to it. After spending so many years just moving from woman to woman without a second thought, usually leaving in the early hours of the morning, cuddling wasn't something he was familiar with anymore. He hadn't even been that affectionate with his ex-wife. The feeling of Julia's hand against his skin, so gentle and so caring, was so soothing and calming that it was quite unbelievable to him.

"What is it?" Julia asked him, her eyes meeting his, "What are you thinking about?"

"How good you are with your hands." Nick answered, smirking at her wickedly.

"Oh, yeah?" She asked with a slightly nervous smile.

"Yeah..." Nick whispered, leaning forward to kiss her.

Their lips met, and like most of the kisses they'd shared, it began very gently and tentatively, like Julia was still trying to adjust and get comfortable with sharing this kind of contact with him. He had to admire the trust she put in him, considering everything she'd been going through up until the day they met. It must've been hard for her to remove herself from the mindset of fearing for her safety if she did the slightest thing wrong. He tried to coax her to deepen the kiss by brushing the backs of his fingers along her cheek before moving them to tangle in her hair, which caused her to let out a soft sigh and part her lips further for him.

He almost smiled. She was growing more confident and gaining more confidence in him as well. She trusted him to lead her. That meant a lot more to him than he thought it would. She broke their kiss first, drawing her lips into a tight line as she moved her hand to cup his cheek in a tender manner, her thumb stroking along his stubbled jaw as she then went to play with his hair. She seemed to really like his hair.

"We need to sleep, Nick."

Her tone was playful despite the sincerity it held, and with a very overly dramatic roll of his eyes, Nick gave in, pressed one last lingering kiss to her forehead before whispering gently in her ear.

"Goodnight."

Julia kissed his forehead in return and then rolled over so that her back was to him, allowing him to spoon her. Getting settled behind her, Nick kissed her shoulder and then pulled the covers a little further around her to keep her warm. Resting his head on his pillow, he let out a contented sigh and tried desperately to get some rest.

Julia awoke the next morning to find Nick had rolled away from her during the night. He was on his back with an arm behind his head, his other hand resting on his stomach. He looked so peaceful as he slept, his lips parted ever so slightly as he took slow, deep, steady breaths in and out, his chest rising and falling with each one. She leant across slowly, turning her body to face his as she then threaded her fingers carefully into his chest hair, pressing her lips to his temple. To her astonishment, his hand that had been resting on his stomach moved to take hers, keeping it held against his chest. He turned his head to his right, his lips now brushing her forehead.

"Morning..." He murmured, his voice thick and gruff.

"Morning, sweetie." She whispered, pulling back to look at him, brushing her fingers through his hair, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."

"I was already waking up when you moved over here." He told her, turning on his side to hold her properly, "You sleep okay?"

"I woke up a couple of times during the night, but that's about it." Julia whispered, "How about you?"

"Slept like a log... Astoundingly." He murmured, "Coach's snoring, however, wasn't helpful when I was actually trying to get to sleep."

Julia smiled softly, nuzzling him gently as she pressed closer to him. She burrowed into his chest, inhaling that wonderful, natural scent that guys seemed to have in the morning. She sighed contentedly when he seemed to gather her into himself, moving to play with her hair. They wanted to sleep for a little longer, but just as they settled back down together, they heard a curse coming from nearby, and were then disturbed with a knock on the wall next to their room.

"Nick? Jules? Ya both decent?"

Nick groaned and sat up, the thick covers pooling around his waist. He encouraged Julia to lay back down, promising her he'd be right back, before standing up, revealing his dark boxers that clung so tightly to his frame that Julia couldn't help but stare at his rather beautifully shaped backside. She saw him pull back the curtain enough so that he could look at Coach, but Julia could barely hear what was being said. When Nick returned to her a few moments later, he got back under the covers with her and drew her into his arms again, settling down with her.

"We gotta stop off at some place to get fuel for the boat." He murmured, stroking her back slowly, "We're not gonna get there for a couple of hours so Coach told us to sleep a little longer if we want to."

"We have to leave the boat?" Julia asked worriedly.

"Yeah. Coach offered our services since Virgil's been good enough to offer to take us to New Orleans." Nick replied, tilting his head towards hers before pressing a kiss to her lips, "You wanna stay here for a little while?"

"Yeah." She replied with a grin, leaning forward to kiss him in return.

He flipped her over, keeping his lips against hers to muffle the squeal and the soft giggles that erupted from her at the action, moving to settle between her legs and playfully tease her for a while before they had to get up to make a move to get Virgil's diesel.

That afternoon, the group were all fed, dressed and ready to go. Virgil promised to lower the anchor just offshore and to wait for them to signal him when they had the diesel he needed. With their weapons and bags at the ready, the group of five looked towards the Burger Tank that sat cosily at the dock, already able to hear the growling of infected coming from inside.

"What are we supposed to signal him with?" Nick asked.

"Oh, there are flares in the gun bag." Ellis replied, referring to the bag that Virgil had prepared for them while Nick and Julia were fooling around in their room.

"What gun bag?" Nick asked with a furrowed brow.

"You didn't grab the guns?" Ellis asked, his face a picture of exasperation.

"Me?!" Nick asked accusingly, "Who died and made me gun monitor?!"

"Hey, hey, hey..." Julia stepped between them, her expression one of worry and clear displeasure at the current situation, "Stop that. We have our original guns and we can find something else to signal Virgil with when we're on our way back. Now, we need to go and find this gas and make this job as quick as possible, okay?"

"Wanna hear a prediction?" Nick asked, ignoring everyone when they declined, "There's not gonna be any gas. Watch."

"Alright, Mr Pessimist." Julia murmured, easing him forward, "Come on."

Coach and Ellis led the way into the restaurant, starting to clear the infected out while Rochelle, Nick and Julia searched the kitchen area for anything useful. Nick found a pipe bomb and Julia found a bile jar, of all things, sitting in the refrigerator. Rochelle grabbed some medical supplies from the first aid cabinet which was mounted on the wall next to the refrigerator too, adding to her supply of band-aids and alcohol wipes.

"Let's get moving." Coach said after shooting the last infected dead.

As they left the restaurant, they were confronted with the most disappointing sight, but most unsurprising that they'd come across so far. A large flashing sign sat in front of them, and of course, it told them that there was no gas there, and they'd have to head towards Ducatel Diesel which was God only knew how far away. Another trial, another difficult journey, another nightmare lay ahead of them. Everyone was upset by this realisation, and while Nick was busy cursing, Julia ran her hands over her face which led Rochelle to put a reassuring arm around her.

"I told you." Nick snapped, "I said there wouldn't be any damn gas."

"Alright, alright, we get it." Ellis grumbled, looking unusually angry, "We're all pissed off too. We're gonna have to walk for it."

"Let's try and find this Ducatel Diesel." Coach said with a grimace, "Virgil will wait for us, I'm sure."

Nick scoffed, but as Coach set off walking towards the sign, he followed regardless, looking over his shoulder at Julia, who was looking at him with worry and distress plastered all over her face. He tried to calm himself down, knowing that him getting worked up wasn't helping her at all. His expression softened, and he beckoned her closer to him, trying to ignore the horrible twisting feeling he got in his stomach when she moved towards him with her head down.

"Let's go this way." Coach said, pointing to a pale wooden board that rested against a broken fence just in front of them.

Julia stepped past Nick to walk with Ellis and Coach, leaving him with Rochelle at the back of the group. Nick wasn't happy about that, and Rochelle could tell that he wasn't, so she gently reached out and patted his back in a reassuring manner, which he responded to with a half-hearted glare. They didn't really know if Julia was angry with Nick or upset with him, or if she just wanted to walk with someone else, and it was clear to Rochelle that the not knowing wasn't doing Nick any good.

"Here, Jules..." Ellis offered his hand to the redhead, who took it gratefully to let him help her up and over the ramp that led them into what was someone's backyard.

Nick helped Rochelle over, figuring that it was the least he could do, and jumped down behind her, trying not to focus too much on Julia. He knew she was capable of taking care of herself, so he didn't want to constrain her movements too much like he had in the swamp. He'd only done so to keep her safe, but he knew it hadn't been the best thing to do. Coach was climbing up a ladder onto a trailer roof and was already shooting at infected in the next street as Ellis climbed up next, followed by Julia, Rochelle and then Nick. Using the truck parked up in front of the trailer, the group were able to get to the street safely and as Ellis took Julia to the left to clear out the infected there, Coach and Rochelle took Nick to the right.

"Ya can't watch her the whole time, Nick." Coach said quietly as Nick watched Julia and Ellis heading away from them, "Let's see if there's anything useful in here."

It was at that moment that the sky seemed to grow darker. A rumble was heard in the distance, bringing the five survivors to a standstill. Nick rolled his eyes. Of course a storm was going to come and make their journey twenty times harder. Fantastic. As the first drops of rain started to fall, Julia and Ellis flinched, with Ellis pulling his plaid shirt further around himself while Julia tried to shield her body with her faux leather jacket. Nick was glad he was wearing a jacket now, rather than having to walk around in a soaked polo. Coach had the foresight to bring his coat too, and was getting it out of his bag so that his light blue sweater didn't get wet.

"Let's make this as quick as we can." Coach said with a grimace, beckoning Julia and Ellis to join him and the others, "Come on."

Breaking into a jog, he and the others made their way down the street, taking out any infected that tried to attack them as they went. Nick instructed the group to keep an eye out for landmarks since they'd probably have to come back this way, so everyone was making a mental note of certain things that stuck out to them.

"Through the playground!" Ellis called as they reached the end of the street, pointing to a colourful play area which the zombies had taken over.

"Let's check out these houses." Nick called back, looking at the buildings nearby, one of which was still being built.

Coach opened the door to a house on their right, stepping into the darkened space with apprehension as the squealing of a Spitter could be heard in the distance. They moved through the house carefully, climbing the stairs to search the upstairs rooms for anything useful. The fizzing of the Spitter's acid was what Rochelle could hear right next to her on the landing, and as she turned, she saw the infected running towards her across the rooftops. She shot at her, thankfully getting her before she could gather up enough acid to spit at them, and watched with way too much satisfaction as the large zombie lay in her own stomach acid while it sizzled beneath her prone form.

"Nice shot, Ro." Nick praised her as he returned from a nearby bathroom, "I found this pistol in the bathtub if you wanna take it."

"Thanks, Nick." Rochelle replied sweetly, taking the gun from him, "Don't worry about Jules. I'm sure she'll be okay."

"I dunno." Nick answered with a deep sigh, a sudden feeling of unease and almost panic settling in his chest, "I'm not sure how much more of this she can take. It's like a fucking gauntlet out here. Jumping through hoops and dodging obstacles gets so tiring after a while, and I just... I hate to say it, but I don't know if she's strong enough."

Unbeknownst to Nick and Rochelle, Julia was in earshot, listening with a lump in her throat and a tightening sensation in her chest. Did Nick really think that about her? Was that the reason why he'd been so intent on keeping her close to him all the time? So he could stop anything bad from happening to her because he didn't think she was strong enough to handle herself? Was everything he'd said to her back in the swamp about her being able to hold her own a complete lie?

"Nick, that woman survived domestic abuse." Rochelle said, looking at him as if he was crazy, "And you're here questioning her strength?"

"She only survived that because her ex took his leave first." Nick said with a shake of his head, "He left her to die in that hotel, so the only reason she's still alive is that somehow, she didn't get eaten or attacked while she was out cold. And then she met us, and we've been saving her ass left, right and centre."

Julia's eyes were now reddened, welling with tears. Was this really his opinion of her? Did he really think that the only reason she managed to escape her relationship was due to Kevin calling the shots? Maybe he was right... Even gaining her freedom from her abusive partner hadn't been in her control. Her heart sank. Maybe it wasn't even worth trying to survive this mess anymore. The one person who she'd trusted so intimately both with her past and with herself didn't think her capable.

"Listen to yourself." Rochelle said with a look of horror now present on her face, rather than confusion, "You're panicking. Do you realise that? You're panicking right now, and it's making you say things you don't really mean. You know damn well that Julia can handle herself. She's saved our asses a few times before, you know that."

"I'm not panicking." Nick snapped in a harsh, but quiet tone despite the fact that he knew damn well Rochelle was right.

It was so strange, almost like he couldn't control what was coming out of his mouth. All he wanted was to keep Julia close where he could keep his eye on her. She'd come to mean a lot to him lately, and while that notion scared him a little due to the fact that he didn't get attached easily, it also made him freak out internally at the thought of not having her within reach, and he'd find any damn excuse to keep her near him, even if it meant making himself believe she was less capable than she actually was.

"Yes, you are." Rochelle answered him in a similar tone, "Julia might stumble, but she always manages to right herself. We all have those moments, Nick, and that's what you're having right now. Pull yourself together."

Julia couldn't stand it anymore. She pulled the door to the bedroom open, causing a look of alarm to spread across both Rochelle and Nick's faces. He didn't think she was strong enough? No problem. She'd show him just how strong she was. And when the time came for her to do so, she'd make him regret those things he'd just said about her. She was determined to prove him wrong.

"Jules..." Rochelle's voice came out breathy and anxious, which Julia expected was down to the fact that she'd heard what they'd said, "Did you find anything?"

"No." Julia replied stoically, "I'm gonna search downstairs."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Nick asked, his face pale and his expression one of both panic and worry.

"I'm fine, thanks." Julia answered, keeping her head down, "You can stay here with Ro."

That was all the confirmation that Nick and Rochelle needed that indeed, she had heard what they'd been talking about. The second that Julia had disappeared out of sight, Nick raised his eyes to the ceiling in frustration, turned around and rested his forehead against the wall before banging it softly against the hard surface a few times in frustration.

"Fuck..." He hissed out through gritted teeth, "Okay... So, I might have been panicking... And she just heard everything we were saying..."

"Yep." Rochelle said with a nod, "You need to fix it. And you need to do it soon."

"You were saying stuff too." Nick pointed out angrily.

"Yeah, but nothing I was saying was negative." Rochelle snapped back, crossing her arms over her chest.

Nick rolled his eyes, his face twisting into a scowl. Rochelle was right. She hadn't said anything negative, but Nick had. It only just seemed to hit him at that time exactly what he had said and what she must've thought when he'd been saying it. Rochelle could see it register with him, and she saw the resignation and the disappointment in himself as he cursed to himself, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Are relationships always this hard?"

"No." Rochelle answered him with a shrug, "If you're dating someone with baggage, they can get tricky, though. And you both have baggage, right?"

"I guess so." Nick muttered, looking up as Coach and Ellis returned from their search of another bedroom.

"Where's Jules?" Coach asked, unaware of what had just happened.

"Searching downstairs." Rochelle replied, "We'd better go see if she's found anything."

The group slowly made their way down the stairs, but to their horror, they didn't see Julia anywhere. At first, there was only a small amount of panic, but by the time they'd searched the rest of the rooms and realised that she'd gone out of the back door, which was now open, the real fear started to set in amongst the group, especially with Nick. They moved to check outside to make sure that she hadn't just headed into the street, but they were horrified to see that she wasn't anywhere in sight. What if a Smoker had taken her? What if a Hunter had dragged her off somewhere?

The group called to her collectively, looking around for any sight of the twenty-one-year-old. But, she was nowhere to be seen. Without waiting for the others, Nick broke into a run up the street, desperately searching for a flash of that red hair or the dark, navy coloured top she was wearing under that jacket. A door of a nearby house opened, and Julia stepped out with a pipe bomb in her hand, her gaze trained on the floor.

"Jules!" Nick cried with relief, "Thank God! We couldn't find you!"

"I was looking for supplies. Where were you?" Julia asked, her stare both cold, but full of hurt at the same time.

"We were looking for you." Nick told her with a grimace, "You scared the shit out of me. I thought something might have gotten to you."

"I can take care of myself." She said darkly, walking past him and down the porch steps back to the street before harshly shoving the pipe bomb into his hand, "Give that to Rochelle."

"Jules!"

Nick heard Ellis call to Julia from the street, his feet pounding as he raced towards her and hugged her, clearly thankful that she was safe. Nick turned around and moved to join the others, meeting eyes with Rochelle before shaking his head to tell her that his brief encounter with Julia hadn't gone particularly well. Coach and Ellis were both unaware of what had happened, but they knew something wasn't right. Julia didn't seem to want to be anywhere near either Nick or Rochelle.

"I'm teaming up with you two." She said to Coach and Ellis, "Nick could probably use a break from me."

"Come on, babe, you know that's not true." Nick said nervously, clearing his throat when he realised she wasn't going to answer him.

"Ellis, why don't you and Jules go and see if there's anything useful in that yard sale?" Coach pointed to the arrangement of tables and cardboard boxes further down the street, "We'll be right behind ya."

Ellis smiled, nodded eagerly and took Julia down the street with him, talking to her animatedly about something his buddy Keith once did at a yard sale, while she walked next to him, quiet and clearly with her thoughts occupied by something else. Coach turned to the other two once that Julia and Ellis were out of earshot and gave them both a rather disappointed look.

"Is somethin' wrong?" He asked them both, "'Cause that girl's gone awful quiet all of a sudden."

"Ugh..." Rochelle sighed with a roll of her eyes, unable to stop the guilt from starting to creep up inside her, "She overheard us having a conversation... About her... Nick was freaking out about how he didn't think Julia could cope with this whole jumping-through-hoops situation we keep finding ourselves in, and I was trying to remind him that she's stronger than she looks. And there were some comments about her previous relationship that she might have taken to heart..."

Coach's face became a picture of protective anger, and both Rochelle and Nick found themselves recoiling a little from him. They'd never seen that look on his face before, and they didn't ever want to see it again.

"What comments?" He asked, his voice almost as deep as the rumbling thunder above them.

Rochelle looked at Nick, who let out a frustrated growl and ran a hand over his face. He was beyond angry with himself, and he sure as hell didn't need Coach giving his opinion when he was already feeling so terrible because he knew damn well that Coach would instantly make him the bad guy.

"Frankly, Coach, it's none of your business." He said angrily, "The point is, Julia's now upset with both of us because she heard everything we said. I didn't mean what I was saying anyway, I was just..."

"Shut up, Nick." Coach snapped, cutting him off, "We need to work as a team. If someone gets killed because the three of you can't communicate..."

"No-one's gonna get killed for fuck's sake." Nick snapped back, trying not to get any angrier than he already was.

"You two had better fix this mess as soon as ya can." Coach said darkly, "Girl's fragile enough without stupid shit like this makin' it worse. She's had enough shit to deal with without havin' to listen to y'all makin' judgement calls about her capability in this group. Sweet Hosanna."

With that, the older man turned on his heel to go after Julia and Ellis, leaving Rochelle and Nick to follow behind with that horrid feeling that they both had experienced as children when they'd been called out for doing something they shouldn't have. The shame, for Rochelle, was near enough unbearable. Nick felt pretty ashamed too, especially about his comments regarding Julia's relationship.

'Way to go, asshole.' He thought to himself bitterly, 'You're such a dick. You'd better fucking brace yourself, Nicky, 'cause your stupidity's probably just cost you the best thing that ever happened to your sorry ass. You dumb fucker...'

"Nick?"

Rochelle's voice brought Nick out of this thoughts, and as he looked up at the producer with a grimace, he broke into a quick jog to catch up with her, wondering how the hell he was going to make things up to Julia.

~ To Be Continued ~

I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Thanks for sticking with me so far, everyone! I really do appreciate it!