Disclaimer: 555-2003, who owns Phil of the Future? Not me. Not me.
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"Hullo! Hullo! Hullo! This is Owen, Master of Mirth."
"And I'm Via"
"And we're calling to tell you about our new business, 'The Joke's On You.' It's the first dial-a-joke in which we do the dialing for you, leaving a funny on your answering machine, like this. See, we go to Wells Jr.-Sr. High and we're a couple --"
"Lab partners."
"A couple of lab partners in Mr. Messerschmitt's economics lab. I thought that meant we were going to learn how to print money in the basement, or something even cooler, like turning coal to diamonds, but instead, Chunks!"
"Oh, my. Instead, it's a course to develop economic aptitude in a real world setting. We're entering stage two, implementing our own business plan, which means --"
"Which means if life's treating you like you've just been assigned a five-thousand word essay due at the end of the week on the history of chalk erasers, then consider our daily jokes as your life preservers on white board of your life."
"Owen, that doesn't even make sense."
"Sure it does. You just didn't get it because you don't speak American. Real world got you blue? Are you O-wen yourself more fun in life?"
"Owen."
"Via. Hey, knock-knock."
"Uh, who's there?"
"Oh."
"Uh-oh. I see where this is going ... Oh, all right. 'Oh' who?"
"O-when are you going out to dinner with me?"
"Really, our material has to be better than that, Owen. Knock-knock jokes?"
"You can do better?"
"Any day, any time, Can O'Snakes Boy."
"How about right here and now, O-Livia? Go on, if you think you have funny bone enough to out shine the O-Dog."
"Want to hear a blonde joke?"
"Sure."
"Owen. HAHAHAHAHHAAAheeehaaa..."
"Via, you can't tell a joke. See, in order for it to be funny the blonde has to be too dumb to understand that the joke's really on -- hey, wait ... HEY! Stop laughing."
"HA! HA! HAH-HAW, HAW (SNORT!) HA HA HA HA HEE HEE hee .."
"NOT FUNNY, Vee."
"(Koff, koff) Ha (Koff) ha ha. (Ahh!) Oh-when, will you develop a healthy sense of humor, Blondie? For more great humor, dial 555-1212 to subscribe to 'The Joke's On You.' Don't miss out on this opportunity, or, like my fair-haired friend here, the joke will be on you."
"I'm so going to get you for that."
"Oh, I'm sorry, Partner. Say, how do you keep a blonde in suspense?"
"I don't know, Via. How do you keep a blonde in suspense? Vee? Well, are you going to tell me or not? Vee? Why are you walking away? Oh, come on, Vee; you have to tell me the answer. Via?"
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