A/N - Thanks for the reads and reviews on the last chapter. TW continues for another couple of chapters as a blanket policy. Continuing thanks to textbookone for her beta reading!

I really hope you guys like this one. It went... a little differently than it was originally supposed to. Please let me know your thoughts!

CHAPTER 18

Emma glanced over her shoulder to find Bae trailing behind her - wandering in a haze, as he'd been for the last few hours. She couldn't blame him - he'd had a nightmare walk into their home and accost them both, turning their lives upside down. It couldn't have been easy to have your life destroyed for a second time by someone you'd long supposed dead. She could only imagine the emotions that brought back - reminders of abandonment by his mother, reminders of his time on that island of horrors. Her heart ached for him, and it was no surprise to her that he was mired in the events of the cave.

Of course, for that matter, so was she. Not for the same reasons, of course; hers were far more selfish and she was trying her best to let it go. But that pirate had accused Bae of being in love with her… and worse, Bae hadn't denied it. Much as she tried to tell herself it was because he was distracted with far more important things - like keeping the two of them alive - she couldn't help replaying the moment over and over in her mind. "That princess you're in love with," that pirate had said, and whatever had made him think such a thing? Sure, Bae had been uncharacteristically possessive - since when did he call her his wife, anyways? - and protective, trying his best to save her, but that was just his nature. Wasn't it?

She questioned herself then, wondering what the outsider had seen that neither of them were privy to. Surely Bae wasn't in love with her - he wasn't one to hide much. Perhaps the pirate was just trying to unnerve them with baseless accusations. "But what if?" that little voice began again, the same one that had questioned his panic from the morning that now felt so long ago. That was two marks in the what if category... and that little voice was growing louder.

A glance over her shoulder strengthened her resolve to silence it. Bae had fallen further behind, barely lifting his feet as he walked. Who was she to be so wrapped up in her overly romantic notions at a time like this? He needed her, and if she truly loved him - perhaps it was time to stop denying that much, at least - then his needs should come first. That's what she'd heard from her parents, love is selfless, love is strength - and how could she lay claim to loving him if she were more focused on the reciprocation of her feelings than on the well-being of the boy she so adored?

She stopped and turned, trying in vain to meet his gaze. She'd expected that as they walked he'd open up - he usually did, given time - but instead he seemed to be drawing further inward.

Perhaps it was time for her to take on the role of protector for a while.

"Bae?"

"Hmm."

"Are you okay?"

He shook his head and she stopped, turning to face him. "Talk to me about it?"

His voice came out a whisper. "It's all my fault," he said, dropping his chin as his eyes fell to the ground. She closed the space between them almost immediately, planting herself in front of him and frowning as he averted his eyes.

"Hey," she said softly, catching his chin in her hand. "Hey. It is not your fault."

She felt his chin try to drop further, stopped only by her grip, and gently she traced his jawline with her thumb. As she stood looking at his broken, guilt-ridden posture - slumped shoulders, downtrodden expression - every fiber of her being ached to lean in and kiss his sorrows away. She drew in a ragged breath, relying on every bit of poise and restraint she'd practiced over her eighteen years as royalty to hold herself back from taking such advantage of his vulnerability. Instead she leaned forward, rising up on tiptoe. She placed her lips on his forehead in a far more chaste expression of her feelings, letting every bit of her love for him flow through and hoping he could somehow sense what she could not speak.

After a long moment, she tilted her head down, resting her forehead against Bae's and lifting his chin until she was able to catch his gaze. Whisper-soft, she reassured him once again. "None of this is your fault. Not your mother leaving, not your father's manipulations, not that pirate's murderous need for vengeance. They make their own decisions, and it's not your responsibility to stop them."

He broke her gaze, looking down as he shook his head and refuted her statement. "Emma, I-"

"No," she replied, her tone firm. She settled back onto her heels as she spoke. "I'll not have you blaming yourself for his death. If you hadn't ducked out of the way, he would've run you through with his sword. It was his own need for vengeance that killed him, not you. All you did was keep yourself from getting stabbed. There's no need for guilt in that." She drew a shaky breath in. "If he had succeeded, I... I don't know what I would've done. I can't do this alone, Bae."

He lifted his gaze back up and sent her a soft smile, appearing appreciative of the reassurances - even if she knew he couldn't quite bring himself to believe them. "You won't have to, Emma. I promised to take care of you, and I don't break my promises."

"We promised to take care of each other, if I recall correctly," she pointed out, sending him a gentle smile and grabbing his hand as she began to walk again. "I haven't need of a knight to rescue me, but having a comrade in all of this is worth more than I could possibly express."

She felt her arm move up and down slightly, and despite the fact that he was half a step behind her, she knew that he'd shrugged - another tell of when she tried to give him credit for something he didn't feel worthy of. "It's the least I can do, after all my father put you through."

Shaking her head, she glanced back over her shoulder as she rebutted his statement. "Bae, you need to stop blaming yourself! Your father and my parents made a deal. It wasn't your fault, it wasn't my fault, and in all honesty, if I was going to be married off to someone I could have done a whole lot worse." She sent a grin to her left, hoping the light tone and jovial grin hid how intensely she meant that statement.

He managed a small smile - for her benefit, she knew - and her heart leapt that she'd been able to save him from a bit of his misery. It was her new mission, she decided in that moment. She might not be able to tell him how much he was loved, but at a minimum, she was going to ensure he knew how much he was valued.

"That was our last item?" Charming said, looking at Rumplestiltskin with panic in his eyes. "It just flew off the cliff and - gone."

"It's just as well," the sorcerer replied. "We're nearly out of potion."

"I can't accept that," Charming said, turning from where they'd chased the scarf to the edge of the cliff. "They can't all have just disappeared. Perhaps some of the ones we lost yesterday got lodged somewhere in those boulders down there - I'm going to look."

With that, the prince darted towards the side of the mountain, barely keeping head above heels as he rushed down the side. They'd spent the last several hours repeatedly untangling the scarf from the brush on the mountain's side. They took it back to the glade where they'd camped and finally then it climbed the ridge, leaving them to follow on foot. As they neared the top, it flitted off into the distance, disappearing from sight.

Rumplestiltskin followed the prince at a much more leisurely pace. If it were up to him, they would've long since given up on this wild goose chase. Something was amiss - perhaps in the brewing of the potion, or in the ownership of the item. But the prince wouldn't hear of it, bound and determined that the collection of tunics, scarves and shawls would lead them to the children they so desperately sought.

By the time he arrived at the foot of the mountain, the prince had clambered through a number of boulders. "It's gotta be here somewhere," he muttered, and only in the still of the countryside was he audible. As he reached the vertical rock face of the cliff on which they had just stood, he slid off of the rocks and onto the ground. "There's some clearance back here," he hollered. "Perhaps it's on the ground - aah!"

The prince disappeared from sight completely, leaving Rumplestiltskin momentarily baffled. Moments later, he popped back out. "There's a cave!"

Having no interest in climbing across the boulders as the prince had done, Rumplestiltskin flickered into the cave just in front of the Prince, materializing with a torch in his hand.

"Mind the slope," he said, holding the light out to guide the bewildered prince into the cave.

To his credit, Charming didn't comment on Rumplestiltskin's sudden appearance, merely following him as he walked deeper into the blackness. Before long, a small alcove appeared to the left - pallets assembled of sticks and leaves, a circle of stones with charred branches in the center.

"A camp," Charming declared, breath heavy with excitement. "This must be theirs!"

"Or it was," Rumplestiltskin replied, stepping into the space. "Fire's cold."

"At least they had a fire."

"And separate beds," Rumplestiltskin said, gesturing at the pallets that lay at either side of the alcove. "I told you Bae posed no threat to your princess."

The prince grunted, snatching up a long branch and lighting it off of the torch that Rumplestiltskin carried. "I'll check the rest of the cave."

As Charming wandered deeper into the cavern, Rumplestiltskin continued to study the area they'd just discovered. Indeed, upon first glance there were two pallets, laid out on either side of the remnants of the fire. But a closer inspection told a different story. The left pallet consisted of a narrow arrangement of sticks, doing little more than providing the barest of buffers between its occupant and the floor. The pallet on the right, however, was a bit more substantial. Its base of sticks was covered in a thick layer of dried leaves and greenery, along with an odd feather scattered here or there. It was wider than the other - by a good measure. Also of interest was the fire pit; soot marks on the ground lay not only inside the current circle of stones, but trailed to the right as well - as if it had originally been centered between the cots.

As he considered the change in its position and the disparity between the beds, Rumplestiltskin began to smirk. Yes, the children had indeed arrived at the cave sleeping in separate beds. Judging from the scene before him, they hadn't remained that way. Perhaps time spent living together in a cave had drawn them together in a way the cottage never could.

Upon further thought, he realized it was best not to share this finding with his comrade. The prince was short enough on temper already, and Rumplestiltskin didn't need to give him another reason to go gunning for Bae. That was the real motive behind agreeing to work with the prince, of course; no telling what he'd do once he found the duo and Rumplestiltskin would prefer to be there to ensure that nothing went awry. He wouldn't be losing Bae again.

Studying the evidence in the cave, it was clear that the duo knew how to take care of themselves. The beds, the fire, evidence of food - much as he hated not having his son close, perhaps allowing him time to bond with the princess was a greater priority in the moment. They'd run, hadn't come to their parents for help - and he imagined they'd stay away until Cora was caught. And it seemed they'd grown quite close in the process, just as he'd hoped they would. Perhaps it was best to focus on the Cora problem, leave the children to lean on each other for a while. Once it was safe, they'd undoubtedly come home - he couldn't imagine the spirited princess choosing cave dwelling as her preferred habitat.

"I found a shawl," came Charming's voice, the prince appearing at his elbow.

So focused on the situation in front of him was Rumplestiltskin that he hadn't heard the man approach. Startled, he turned to Charming, hoping to keep him from studying the scene before them too closely. "Oh?"

"It's Emma's. They were here."

"Yet it seems they've fled again. I wonder why."

Charming shrugged. "No matter. This is still wet from washing - they haven't been gone long. We'll just dump your potion on it and be right behind them."

Rumplestiltskin nodded, eyeing the damp cloth. As he pulled the vial out, he studied it for a moment. "This'll be the last of it."

"And then what."

"We go home. I make more. We start again."

Charming nodded, the scowl on his face speaking to his displeasure at the concept. He extinguished his torch, tossing it to the side and holding his hand out for the potion. Rumplestiltskin handed it over, and as Charming flicked the glass vial, the last of the potion brought the shawl to life. It lilted into the air, albeit lower than normal due to its waterlogged state, and both men followed as it flew to the back of the cave. There it struck the back wall before rebounding into the waterfall and being carried down into the abyss.

"So much for your magic," Charming spat, stalking back towards Rumplestiltskin. He snatched the torch from his hands and continued stomping towards the mouth of the cave.

Rumplestiltskin sighed, conjuring another torch. He spent another moment taking in the alcove before turning to follow the prince. Yes... a delay in finding the children may be just what they needed.

Emma's resolve to tuck her romantic notions out of sight lasted but a couple of hours. As Bae's guilt seemed to wane, she found herself drifting again to the events of the day, moments echoing through her mind, playing over and over in a never ending cacophony.

"...That princess you're in love with."

"I won't let you take my wife!"

"...You were gone."

"...But what if?"

That little voice was growing, moving from a whisper to a dull roar. "What if," it said, but no longer was it "What if he feels the same?" but instead, "What if you're making both of you miserable?"

After all, Bae had far too much kindness, too much honor, to ever put her in such an awkward position. For him to even consider it - well, he wouldn't. He'd consider it an affront to her honor, an insult to her status...

He'd be wrong.

She couldn't quiet that voice any more - hers, Bae's, even that dreadful pirate's - not until she knew. She might regret it to her dying day, but surely asking him about his own actions would be far less humiliating than pining like a schoolgirl. Wouldn't it?

Taking a breath, she put her better sense aside.. "Bae, about what happened in the cave-"

"Hm?"

"The cave. I - I wanted to talk about it."

She glanced back to find Bae's eyes narrowed, his expression darkened. "Which part?"

"The pirate, he - he said some things."

"He said a lot of things, Emma. I'm sorry that you had to hear them."

The boy was oblivious to her plight. Emma's heart hammered in her chest as she realized she'd need to be more specific. "I... you called me your wife."

He exhaled. "You are my wife."

"And he said - well - I guess he more accused you of being in love with me."

When he didn't answer, she chanced a glance over her shoulder to find him stock still, eyes closed, breathing carefully through his nose. Her own breath caught and she waited seconds - minutes, maybe - for an answer. When one didn't come, she finished the question.

"Are you?"

He shrugged, no change in expression, no movement aside from the slight rise and fall of his shoulders. Another moment passed, and as the tension hung between them, the words tumbled from Emma's mouth like water spilling from a glass - finding herself powerless to stop them.

"Because I'm in love with you."

At her declaration his eyes popped open, shock washing over every last one of his features. "Princess, I-"

"Don't 'princess' me. We're well beyond that. I just need to know if that pirate's accusation is true. Do you love me?"

He blew out a breath. "I - I fear I've formed an attachment..."

"An attachment," she said, trying her best to mask her disappointment. "Is that all."

"I -" He hesitated, appearing to war with himself before he continued. "It can't be more than that."

"It can't -" Her expression darkened. "I see." She turned on her heel and began walking again, wishing more than anything she had her makeshift sword, the length of wood allowing her to take out her frustration on the brush. But no, the pirate had destroyed that, too.

"Emma," she heard from behind her, and she didn't have to look to know the expression on his face, pleading with her as he tried to smooth things over. "Emma, please."

"Please what," she asked, wheeling on him, a sudden onset of tears hot in her eyes. "Please humiliate myself more?"

He shook his head. "Please don't ask me to… Emma, you have to understand. I can't love you."

She began to walk again as she chuckled, an angry, sarcastic sound. "Because I'm a princess?"

His chin dropped again before he spoke, voice low and uncertain. "Because everything I ever love gets ripped away from me. I can't go through it again."

She stopped once more and this time the tears were those of compassion instead of humiliation. "Oh, Bae," she said, shaking her head. "I would never - I could never do that to you. To hurt you like that... how cruel would I be, to know your deepest fears and be the one to make you realize them?"

He shrugged, toe scuffing at the ground. "Everyone else has."

She blew out a breath, steadying herself. "Bae. Look at me."

He shook his head, studying the scar he'd made in the dirt.

"Baelfire."

Her tone must have struck something within him, for finally he met her gaze. "I'm not everyone else. I'm just Emma - not a princess, not heir to the kingdom, not the girl forced to marry you - just Emma. And I'm telling you that I choose you. Over everything... I'd pick you over it all."

"You have a kingdom to run," he scoffed. "A people to be accountable to."

"And they all matter less than you."

She stared back at him, jaw set, no intention of backing down as she watched him churn her words over in his head.

"But your parents-"

"No. You."

He evaded her gaze again and she plunged ahead. "They're my parents, I love them. And it's my kingdom, I'm responsible to it. I've been given all of that, had it laid on my shoulders, and I'll accept the responsibility. But you - I choose you. And if I had to choose between you and all of that, I'm almost ashamed to admit how easy the decision would be.

"All my life, I've been told what my path would be. This is the first thing I've chosen - for me - because it's what I wanted. Please don't tell me I can't have it because I've been saddled with the responsibility of the kingdom. If it's because you don't love me - okay - I can accept that. And if it's because you can't risk getting hurt, I love you enough not to ask you to put yourself on the line. But if it's because you feel unworthy because of my status or my responsibilities or whatever…" She pushed out a breath. "Please don't make me lose the only thing I've ever wanted because of something that's eclipsed who I am for my whole life. This is about you and me… not whatever lies out there."

She caught her breath again, afraid to breathe in the silence that persisted after her speech. His eyes were on the ground again, toe digging in the ever-deepening scuff mark he'd made in the soft forest dirt. Finally he pushed out a breath, breaking the silence. "No one's ever chosen me before."

"Well they're all idiots," she said, scoffing. "You deserve to be reminded of your worth, not walked upon for those things that make you amazing."

He snorted. "I'd hardly say amazing."

"It's a good thing I'm not asking you then." She took a turn at kicking at the ground. "You're doing a marvelous job of avoiding the question, you know."

He blew out a breath. "I know."

"Is it true, what he said? Are you in love with me?"

She waited as he frowned and returned to working on his spot in the ground. He was thinking, she knew - how to respond? How to let her down slowly? She almost regretted the whole conversation - here was the awkwardness she was so dreading, her whole reason for suppressing her feelings in the first place - when finally he spoke.

"I don't think I'd thought about it, really. When he said that, I - I faltered. 'Am I?' I don't suppose I've ever had a great template of what love is; my mother didn't love my father, certainly; as a boy I thought my father loved me - but is it really love when it's corrupted so easily?

"I suppose if I'd ever stopped to think about it, I would have assumed I was in love with you. You're a princess, I'm a peasant - that's how it's supposed to be, right? Adoration and undying devotion?" She started to speak, to refute his notions of her status, but he held up a hand to silence her. "But Emma - not the princess - well, that's a bit different."

He smiled then, and her insides clenched up, the dangerous edge of hope beginning to push through. Her breath caught again - waiting - entire future pinned on his next words.

"What is love, really? It should be protective, not destructive; you shouldn't say you love someone and then sell them out or forsake them for a shiny object or an opportunity for power. I know that you're the first person in centuries I've connected with, trusted, felt understood by. Felt at ease with. The first person I've considered a friend. And, I know after this morning-"

He caught her gaze, letting out a heavy sigh and steeling himself for his next statement - the admission as much to himself as it was to her. "I know you're the first person I've needed in a very long time. That's a terrifying feeling, after centuries of being alone and surviving without anyone else. I woke this morning and when I couldn't find you, I was utterly panicked. But once I'd found you, I panicked even more at the wave of relief I felt. And though I tried to tell myself it was because I'd made a promise to your parents… it wasn't. It's because I don't know how I'd continue on without the one person whom I've come to rely on."

She watched him, sorting his feelings aloud, giving him space to work himself out. She wanted to tell him friendship and reliance were but a short leap to love - she knew that better than anyone. To remind him of how protective he'd been of her - from the start, but especially hours earlier when he'd been faced with the possibility of losing her. But she forced herself to stay silent, instead encouraging him to continue with a supportive look, a nod, patience that she didn't really possess. His answer served as her reward.

"Emma, when that pirate threatened to harm you... only then did I realize how dear you'd become to me. I couldn't bear the thought of you being hurt, of losing you, of going forward without you. Still can't. But if it's necessary, if it's best for you, best for your kingdom… I remain willing to abide by my original promise."

Her brow furrowed. "Why would you do such a thing? Haven't you heard a word I've said?"

He shrugged, a roll of the shoulders as he feigned indifference. "I made a promise."

"And I'm releasing you from it. From all of it, if you wish. What do you want, Bae?"

"To keep you safe from Cora."

The response came quickly, but it hung in the air - the rest of the words unsaid. But Emma, for all her weeks of misery, needed to hear them. "And?"

"To remain at your side." A moment of hesitation, a blink and then, "as your husband."

Emma's arms were around him instantly, crushing him in an embrace. He buried his nose in the crink of her neck and they remained there for an indeterminable amount of time, pent up emotions and fears and the weight of the day melting away in the security of each other's arms. Warm and safe, a contrast to their lives at present, and a refuge from the fears of the world. Finally Emma drew back, holding her love at arms length and catching his eyes.

"Truly, Bae, you feel as I do?"

He nodded. "I love you."

"And I you," she exhaled, curling back into his embrace once again.

Seconds passed, and then a minute, before she looked up at him - love and trust shining in her eyes. "What now, Bae?"

"We need to keep moving, get you out of here. No telling who else Cora might have on our tail."

She nodded, reluctantly slipping out of his embrace. Grabbing his hand, she intertwined her fingers in his, clinging to them - reluctant to break the long sought after connection. "How far do you think we should go?" she asked, beginning to walk again.

He shrugged, an affable action this time, far removed from the show of despondence he harbored earlier. "As far away as we can get, I suppose."

Her brow furrowed as she thought. "There's a town I know, a small village out toward the end of the realm - Lincolnshire. Daddy and I visited it once on our way back from a neighboring kingdom. It's in a far off corner of the kingdom and I can't imagine anyone would look for us there."

He nodded. "It's how far?"

"About three days' journey by carriage."

His brow furrowed. "We have no carriage, Emma..."

"I know." She matched his frown, well aware of the odds stacked against them.

"You think we should go that far by foot?"

"Clearly we're not safe in this area. The further away we can get, the better. Besides," she said, squeezing his hand, "as long as we're together, who cares how far we have to go?"

He laughed then, marveling at the change from the girl who had spent the last weeks skulking around the cave. "My feet do, Emma dear," he replied, teasing her.

"They can rest when we get to safety. They'll have no purpose if the rest of you is dead."

He laughed, the sound a most welcome contrast to the tension that surrounded them. "Fair enough. I suppose it's off to Lincolnshire we go."

Hand in hand they marched ahead, little discussion as they pushed south towards a warmer climate and an unknown future. Somehow, in the moment those worries seemed to fade, eclipsed by the security of each having the other standing steadfast by their side.