"Maria are you ok" I look up to see three concerned faces and it's not till now that I realize I've started to cry. I quickly wipe the tears and start to clear the table even though I have barely touched the food

"Yes I'm fine"

"Hunni are you sure" I can see Robert is concerned but I don't need to worry him any more.

"Yeah honestly I'm just a bit emotional at the moment. Don't worry about me I'll be fine" I quickly leave the room before anyone else can start to question me. I'll be fine? Yes. Will Gabriella be fine? I'm not so sure.

It's been two hours since my mom came into to try and get me to leave my room. Since then everyone else in the house has come in and tried but I haven't moved from my spot on the windowsill in 5 hours.

Looking at the spot were he was hit for 5 hours has made me realize that I can't live here anymore. I don't want to and I know I wont for a long time but I know that eventually I will have to accept his death and move on and to be able to do that I cant walk out the front door every day and see where he died. It will be too hard and I will never forget. I will never forget Josh but I want to forget the terrified look in his eyes. The pain in his voice as he screamed out in agony. The smell of blood that covered me as I held him and begged him to stay with me. I want to forget the painful agonizing way he left this world. I want to forget the haunting memories of his death.

"Gabriella" this time when my mom came in I turned around and looked at her. "Are you feeling better" she asked with concern as put a tray of food on my dressing table. I got up and moved so I was sitting on the bed.

"I guess" she comes and sits with me on the bed and takes my hand

"Talk to me. What are you thinking about?"

"I don't want be here anymore"
"No Gabriella you cant think like that do you really think Josh would want you to kill yourself.." I cut my mother off before she could continue

"No mom, I'm not talking about killing myself I meant that I don't want to be in this town anymore" I see her relax when she realizes that I'm not going to commit suicide then she blushes slightly when she realizes what she just accused me of

"Oh sorry sweetie. What so you mean you don't want to be in this town anymore? I thought you'd want to be connected to Josh?" just hearing his name spoken allowed is hard for me.

"That's the thing. Everything in this town reminds me of him and everyone knows who he is and who I am. Mom when I see people they're going to know what happened and give me the sympathy look and never let me forget that the person I'm meant to be with is gone. And it's too hard. It's too hard to see the spot where he was hit every time I open my curtains or walk out the front door. I can't do it because every time I see it the image of him and the car run through my head"

"But that will leave after time" I see my mom sigh and I know she doesn't quite understand why I have to leave but I can see she's thinking about it

"Not if I'm constantly reminded of it every single day. Look mom I know you don't get why I cant live here anymore but you have to understand that if I have any chance of ever accepting this and moving on I wont be able to do it in town where everything and every person reminds me of Josh" I say desperately trying to get her to understand. I know it's asking a lot from my parents but I hope they will understand that it's for the best.

"Okay I can understand why you don't want to live here because of the memories but I want you try it"

"But mom..." she cuts me off before I start begging

"Listen I wasn't finished. I want you to try and really try but if in a week you still feel the same way I will let you take up Taylor's offer" I look at her confused

"What offer?"
"Taylor's parents have offered to let you move in with them and go to school in Albuquerque. They thought that you might need your best friend and different place to make a new start"

"Really they would let me live with them" I can't believe it. I mean I've always been close to them they're like my second parents but I can't believe they would offer me a place in their home

"Really. Taylor told me and I rang them and they said they were happy to do it as they could imagine how hard it is for you" I can see it in her eyes that she doesn't want me to go. I'm their only child.

"okay"

"Look I know this is so hard for you but I want you to promise me that your really going to think about staying here because even though I can understand how hard it will be having to see everything that reminds you of him but just remember that we're all here for you okay?"

"Okay I promise I'll think about it"
"That's all I ask" and without saying anything else she swiftly leaves the room.

"JOSH LOOK OUT"

"Gabriella..Gabriella wake up…Gabriella?"

"NOOOOOOOO" I scream waking myself up. Taylor is sat next to me with Chris at the bottom of the bed. They look concerned for me but when I really look I notice the dark bags under their eyes and they way they seem to be fighting to stay awake. I wonder how long they've been in here with me. It can't have been that long because recently I can't sleep for longer than an hour at a time.

"How long was I asleep"?

"About 2 hours" well its getting longer which is a good sign

"But you started screaming about half an hour ago" Chris adds in. So maybe not then.

"I'm sorry. How long have you guys been awake?"

"Well we technically never got to sleep in the first place" Taylor says quietly

"I'm sorry. You should go to bed I'll be fine" even as I'm saying it I know they won't believe me. As soon as the words leave my mouth I see them both glance at each other and give me that as if you'll be fine look.

"Gabriella how many times do we have to tell you? We're going to be here for you whenever you need us"

"Really?" Chris moves so he's sat on my other side and puts his arm around me

"Really we're not going to leave you. I promise" just this simple sentence that was said to be comforting gets to me. I start crying and the both seem to be not expecting that.

"Hey what are the tears about?"

"I'm sorry it's just I've been promised that before. Josh swore he would never leave me. He said he'd be there when ever I needed him and now he's gone. He's gone"