Hey just wanted to say that sorry I can't be quicker posting chapters but I'm very busy at the moment, so I don't get chances to write that often. Anyways hope you like it, please let me know what you think. :D x
I get up off my bed and go to my desk picking up the little box that is resting on top. Kicking off my shoes and jacket I get into bed and curl up under the duvet. I still haven't opened it. I don't know why, but I'm scared too. I feel that when I open it, that's going to be it. Josh is really going to be gone. And I can't let him go. Not yet, I love him too much. For the first time in weeks I start to cry. I mean properly cry. I cling to the box and hold on to the photo of me and Josh as I sob into a pillow.
"what….what should I do…josh…why…..why did you have to die…..you promised you'd never leave me…..you should be here…..Josh….it hurts so much without you…..please….Josh I miss…you.." I can't help but weep at the thought of him. I wish he was here to hold me and kiss me and tell me it was all going to be ok.
I would give anything to have him here for one more day.
One more hour.
Anything.
It's Friday night and after basically ignoring everyone for the past week I've been trapped in my room being questioned by Taylor and Sharpay. I haven't done it in a mean way I've just been thinking about Josh and I haven't been able to deal with everyone around me. I'm such a bad person for forgetting him that I've needed to spend time by myself. With him. Even if that doesn't make any sense, which it doesn't and which is why I can't explain it to Tay and Sharpay. They just wouldn't understand. But I don't want to lie to them.
"Gabriella?" I break out of my thoughts when I hear Taylors voice
"Sorry, what?" they share a glance at each other before sharpay repeats her question
"We asked you what's going on?"
"Yeah you've been really weird this past week Gabs. Ever since Monday you've locked yourself away and barely talked to anyone"
"I….I've just been…I'm…I'm sorry" I don't know what to say to them. They come sit either side of me on my bed.
"Look, whatever it is you can tell us, we're here for you" Sharpay said kindly
"No matter what" Taylor adds on
"It's nothing really….its just…I've….I guess I've just been really missing Josh this week" Well it wasn't a lie. I have been missing Josh so much this week, I've just decided to leave out the part about me and Troy kissing and me feeling guilty about it.
"Aww sweetie why didn't you tell me? I've been so worried about you" Tay says as she pull me into a hug
"I didn't want to bother anyone about it"
"You wouldn't be bothering us"
"And….I didn't really wanna talk about it either….it would have just made more upset"
"We could have helped take your mind off it though?" Taylor pointed out
"I suppose…" I replied quietly. Maybe I should tell them about Troy, they might be able to help me...
"Right well there's still time for that" Taylor suddenly declared and leapt up dragging me and sharpay with her.
"What's happening?"
"We're going to cheer gabby up by taking her out…" Taylor stated.
"And I know just the place" Sharpay finished off for her. They shared a knowing look and grinned at each other then at me.
"Should I be scared?" they both laughed before taking action. Within the next half an hour I've had my hair and makeup done and been forced to change into a dress and heels. We're now in the car going god only knows where. We finally arrive at a restaurant only to find Ryan and Chad waiting for us at the door.
"Why are the guys here?" I ask feeling suddenly nervous that Troy is here.
"Because I text them on the way" Taylor grinned and dragged me inside.
I hugged everyone and we all sat down. There still no sign of Troy anywhere. Maybe he couldn't come. My stomach sinks at this thought, why is it bothering me that he's not here? After ordering drinks we're all chatting while looking at the menu. And it's not awkward at all even though Chad made a joke about me ignoring them all week. He just got a slap across the head from Taylor and we all laughed about it. I feel better already.
"Hey guys sorry I'm late" I hear troy's voice before I see him. I snap my head up and catch his eye across the table. It feels like time stands still as we stare at each other for a few seconds. He then looks away and sits down at the other end of the table. Every so often throughout the meal, I glance at him and catch his eye. He looks anxious; I can see it in his eyes. I smile at him and he smiles back but it's not with the usual warmth that he has. I feel awful. I need to talk to him, apologise for avoiding him all week. After paying we all leave to go somewhere else, although I have no clue where.
"Hey Gabriella?" I spin around to see Troy stood there looking slightly nervous
"Yeah Troy"
"Do you want me to give you a lift to…"
"Oh its ok I'll go with Tayl..." I interrupt him but he interrupts me straight back.
"Please! I need to talk to you" I can hear desperation in his voice even though he speaks so quietly.
"Ok" I reply just as quietly it's almost a whisper. After telling Tay we get into his car and watch as everyone else leaves the parking lot. He still doesn't even turn the engine on.
"Aren't we going to go?" I ask but he just shakes his head slowly.
"What did you want to talk to me about?" I ask although I'm slightly afraid of the answer. He turns to me and just stares at me for a second.
"What did I do?" he asks
"What..."
"What's happened Gabriella…because this past week you've been avoiding me…and as much as I try to think…I just can't figure it out…I don't know what I've done…I…"
"I'm sorry" I immediately feel so guilty.
"Why?" He looks at me and his eyes seem so hurt.
"I'm so sorry Troy…I didn't mean to avoid you…and it's nothing you did...I...I just…." I look away from him and try to hold the tears in that I can feel are threatening to fall. He takes my hand and squeezes it, forcing me to look back at him. His eyes look so kindly at me.
"You can tell me…whatever it is….I'm here for you"
"I'm sorry…I just…..I've been having a hard week…missing my family, Josh, missing home…" I know he heard me say Josh even though I said it ever so quietly. He doesn't respond verbally he just pulls me into a hug. We stay like that for a minute before he slowly pulls back.
"So we're ok?" he smiles down at me?
"Yeah..." I should tell him that we're not ok in the way he wants us to be, but I just can't. I can't bring back that look in his eyes. Not again. So I just smile back and he finally starts the car. We drive in comfortable silence before he turns up at the diner. I notice that it's really busy for a change.
"What's going on?" I ask him as we get out of the car.
"It's there open mile/karaoke night; they do it every few months." He grins back. We walk inside and see everyone else squeezed into a booth so we join them. After getting drinks and watching a few people perform, we're all a bit giggly.
"And now for our next performers we have Sharpay Evans and Gabriella Montez" I hear the host say. I nearly choke on my drink.
"What?!"
"Come on gabs I signed us up, it'll be fun" and before I know what's happening sharpay is dragging me to the stage and force a microphone into my hands.
"What are we even singing?" I whisper to Sharpay ass people stop clapping and the music starts
"You'll know it" I then hear the opening notes of 'don't stop believing and I can't help but grin. Taylor must have picked it. It was our feel good song growing up. Sharpay sings first as I just stand there feeling incredibly nervous. (Sharpay/Gabriella/Both)
'Just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world
She took the midnight train goin' anywhere
Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit
He took the midnight train goin' anywhere'
A singer in a smokey room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on and on and on
Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlights people, living just to find emotion
Hiding, somewhere in the night.
Working hard to get my fill,
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin' anything to roll the dice,
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on
Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlights people, living just to find emotion
Hiding, somewhere in the night.
Don't stop believin'
Hold on to the feelin'
Streetlights people
Don't stop believin'
Hold on to the feelin'
Streetlight people
Don't stop believin'
Hold on to the feelin'
Streetlights people'
By the end of it we are both grinning like idiots. That was so much fun. I can't believe I just did that. We hug and walk back tour table while everyone is cheering and clapping us.
"You guys that was amazing!" Chad shouts and the rest loudly agree and shout similar things.
"Gabriella you have such a good voice" Sharpay says
"What no…you have an incredible voice"
"No you seriously do Gabs" I hear troy agree as the rest of them nod in agreement.
"Really?"
"Really" they all smile at me. I can't help but grin back and for the first time all week I relax and just let myself feel happy.
Please Review :D x