Alice
"Good job Em, you broke her." I tell my brother as I pass him in the garage after dropping Isabella off at the bookstore.
"What happened?" He chuckles, but I shoot daggers at him.
"Scaphoid fracture from her catching all of her weight."
"Ohh..." he looks sympathetic, but still has an amused smile on his face.
"It's not funny, you hurt her!" I tell him, getting into his face, while he stands nearly three feet above me.
"Look shorty, it was an accident. I can't see the future or read minds, so how was I to know she was walking up behind me without paying attention?" He says defensively, holding up his hands in surrender.
I just huff in annoyance, knowing that he couldn't have stopped the clumsy girl from bumping into him. He pats my head, when he realizes he's right on this one, and I bat his hand away.
"Rose and I are going hunting, wanna join?" He asks, his eyebrows raised in excitement.
"No, I'm ok, you guys go ahead."
I head upstairs to my room, and open the window, sitting on the sill with one of my most prized possessions. A first edition copy of Walt Whitman's, "Leaves of Grass".
It's in the middle of the night when I receive the vision of Isabella deciding she would try and keep her distance. It makes my still heart ache in despair and I can't stop the frown that pulls at my lips.
I decide right then and there, that I'll do everything I can to become a part of her life.
Her reservations make sense. She clearly doesn't trust anyone, and though I don't know the reason, I can only assume that her reason is a good one. I understand that she wants to push me away as well, but if I can't even bear the thought of it, I know I couldn't handle it physically either. It's in this moment that I know I must do something.
I start by showing up at her house to offer her a ride to school. Her apprehension almost makes her say no, but she seems to change her mind at the last moment.
When we arrive at school -after trying not to laugh at her reaction to my driving- I ask her about herself. Instead of answering me, we both become consumed with one another, and it seems as though a century has gone by in that single moment. Her eyes roam over my face slowly, drinking me in, and as the seconds tick slowly by, I become more and more entranced by this human. I feel even more connected to her, and all she's doing is studying me.
She seems lost in her own thoughts and her proximity to me grows smaller. Her divine scent fills my senses; but I don't just smell her warm, alluring blood. I smell the lingering scent of her floral shampoo, and the light cologne she has on; though masculine, it isn't strong and it suits her well. I notice for the first time, that her eyes have an array of brown hues, rimmed with the slightest hint of green. Suddenly her breaths are coming and going more quickly, and she appears to be dazed. Something that can be typical between humans and vampires.
"Isabella," I call out to her softly, trying to bring her back to me.
She blinks slowly, and hums a response to me.
"Are you going to answer my question?" I ask her, knowing that my voice came out low and husky.
Her eyes appear to grow darker as they meet mine once more, and her cheeks begin to flush. What becomes more evident though, is that her pulse has quickened just slightly, causing my senses to zero in on the thick blood that is coursing through her neck. I can feel the venom start to pool in my mouth at the mere thought of tasting her. I can feel the blood lust begin to fog my brain, but in that same moment it's like she realizes the situation she's in: the way she's leaned in close to me, and how we're looking at one another. She takes a sudden deep breath, leans away from me and cracks the window.
A light breeze flits through the window and I use the small distraction to try and reign in my impulses. Her pheromones indicate that she's attracted to me, and it's only making my thirst for her worse. I decide to stop breathing to try and clear my head, but I know that the confined space will remain saturated with her essence no matter what.
She looks back at me, and I see her expression become confused when she studies my face once more.
"What do you want to know?" She asks me, however.
"Let's walk." I answer instead, and quickly shut the car off and get out. I know at this point that I cannot risk another minute of her safety by staying in this car with her.
I notice her bewildered expression, and as I walk around the front, I can tell that she's having an internal debate with herself. I open her car door and give her a small smile, "you coming?"
She nods and climbs out, after having quirked her eyebrow at me curiously.
I lead her through the quad, as nearby students gawk at the fact that I'm associating with a student other than my family; but probably also shocked that it's with the new girl.
We start down a trail that I know has a picnic table set up, and we sit down quietly.
I give her a wide smile, to ease any tension that I might have caused when I abruptly got out of the car, and she returns a small one to me.
"So, you moved here from...?" I ask her quizzically, leaving the question open.
"From Phoenix." She states shortly. I see something flash behind her eyes, and realize that it might be a bit of a sore subject for her.
Whatever she left behind in Phoenix must not be something worth going back too.
Deciding not to push too much on it, I don't delve further into detail, instead asking a less personal question. "How long did you live there for?"
"Since I was about a year old." She tells me, her voice a little softer. I realize it means that she grew up far away from her father, and I can't help the sadness I feel in my chest.
I decide to lighten the mood a little, "And you decided to come to this, how did you put it yesterday..." I tap my chin as a small smile comes to my lips, "to the most unsatisfying, wet place ever?" I mimic her expression from yesterday, chuckling at myself.
She rolls her eyes at me, but I notice she can't keep her own smile from her face.
However, I see sadness creep into her eyes as she answers me, "it was the best choice in the few I was given."
I study the changing emotions that she's quickly forcing back into their hiding place, and debate whether to ask my next question, for fear that she'll go through with her earlier plans of shutting me out completely. But my compassion for this broken angel wins and it slips out anyways. "Do you want to talk about it?"
She hesitates immediately, as her eyes study mine. I do my best to convey to her with my gaze that I'm genuinely concerned and interested in her life. She averts her gaze, however, and starts looking around the forest, trying to mask the vulnerability I saw creeping into her expression. I try not to sigh, and remind myself that it's going to take some time to get her to trust me. I must stay persistent and show her that I truly do care, and that I'm not trying to hurt her.
The first morning bell sounds in the distance, and I hear the small sigh of relief that she lets slip. I know she didn't want me to hear it, despite my sensitive hearing allowing me too regardless.
"I guess we should head to class." She murmurs, sparing me a brief glance.
I nod slightly, before we stand together and walk silently back towards the school. When we emerge from the trees, I notice everyone's attention is once again on us. Isabella's jaw clenches in irritation as she glances around at all the curious gazes herself.
"Why is she with her?" I hear one girl ask another.
"Alice is too pretty to be seen with that freak-show!" I hear a guy tell one of his buddies before they all start laughing.
"What makes Freak so special that Cullen isn't with her family?"
These horrible things keep filling my ears, and I have to remind myself that killing innocent humans is a part of the monster that I chose to no longer be, even if the developing need to protect Isabella rises quickly in my chest. So instead, I do my best to tune them out; especially when I see Isabella looking at me with a curious gaze.
"Why is everyone so shocked to see us together?" She asks, her tone curt with annoyance about the other students.
"Probably because me and my family tend to stick together." I answer her without thinking, and immediately regret it.
Great job! If she wasn't already questioning how different you are, she will be now!
"I've got to get a book from my locker before class. I'll see you later, Isabella. Have a good day." I add on quickly, before turning and walking away from her and all the incessant chatter filling my mind.
As I head in the direction of my locker, I notice my family standing near where I just stood with Isabella. Which means that they not only heard the whispers of the other students as I just had, but it means they also heard our small exchange. Rosalie and Edward stand with angry expressions on their faces, faces probably worn since they realized why I left so early this morning. Emmett looks sympathetic toward me and Jasper I realize, is trying to balance his own sympathy while having to feel everyone else's crap.
I shake my head and continue walking. I can't deal with any of their emotions right now. As grateful as I am towards Emmett and Jasper, right now I must focus on the things I can do to make Isabella trust me. How do I do that, though, when to earn trust, you need to give trust as well? And we both certainly have things that will take time for us to open up about.
Sighing in annoyance, I make my way to my locker to switch out books and then head towards the start of a very long day.
-X-X-X-
When lunch time rolls around, I feel the excited anticipation of seeing Isabella bubbling up inside of me and practically skip my way to the lunch room. It's been a rather long morning and I'm hoping just the sight of the brooding girl will lift my spirits; despite how I left things with her this morning. I wouldn't be surprised if she gives me the cold shoulder with how abruptly I left her without answering her question though.
When I walk in to the cafeteria, I see Isabella has already made herself comfortable at her usual table, headphones in, lunch hardly touched and a poetry book open under her nose.
I skip the rouse of getting lunch for myself and head straight for her table. I'm stopped in my tracks, however, by a blonde haired, blue-eyed boy stepping into my immediate path with a wide enthusiastic smile splitting his face open. His eyes read desperation and I can hear his heart racing in his chest.
I stop and give him a pointed look, wanting to know his intentions already.
I hear him take in a shaky breath and then rush it right back out.
Oh god, please don't hyperventilate. I do not have time for that right now.
"Hi," he squeaks out and then clears his throat, "I mean hi." He deepens his voice to a lower octave than usual.
I hear his friends laughing from a nearby table and cut my eyes at them quickly before focusing back on the annoying boy in front of me.
"Can I help you?" I ask as politely as I can muster.
"I uh," he clears his throat again and looks at his shuffling feet, "how are you today Alice?" he finally manages to get out.
"I'm fine Mike. How are you?" I respond with a quick eye roll when he looks away again.
I see his involuntary smile and raise my eyebrows at him in waiting. "I'm good. Good."
"Is there something I can help you with?" I finally ask him when too much precious time has passed.
"Yes!" He responds quickly and loudly. I hear his friends' howling laughter once more. "I was, uh, wondering if you'd like to have lunch with me today?"
I eye him blankly. I know how I should respond and how I would like to respond and cannot seem to decide which route to take.
"I have plans already." I answer simply and start to move around him.
"With her?" I immediately hear the disdain in his voice as he turns to face me now and points a finger in Isabella's direction.
I take an unnecessary breath to show him my impatience and look him straight in the eye when I tell him, "she's way better company than you'll ever be."
"Yea? What's she got that I don't?!" He demands, his anger flaring at the rejection I've just handed him.
"Well, for starters, common sense." I hear his friends' echo of 'ohh... burn' in the back ground. "A compassionate soul and much more." I tell him in annoyance.
I turn and walk away before he can respond. However, I'm saddened when I see that Isabella has left. I feel my shoulders slump and then hear Mike behind me once more.
"Looks like she wants nothing to do with you." Comes his snarky remark.
"Go hit on someone in your minor league and leave the grown girls alone, Mike." I tell him without even looking at him.
I head out the cafeteria doors hoping to find Isabella somewhere outside. I inhale sharply, trying to see if I can find her scent amongst all of the other students. I can smell it faintly, but cannot make out which way she went due to the students moving around me.
Deciding that I don't want to deal with one brother prying into my mind, and another trying to calm my nerves, I head down the trail I took Isabella down this morning. I'm surprised, though, when I find the brown eyed girl that I had been looking for all along.
"Isabella." I can't help but chirp happily as I approach her at the table.
Her eyes meet mine, and I can instantly see the confusion and hesitation written in them. What's even more unsettling, however, is that I can see frustration there too. My demeanor this morning obviously affected her. A frown replaces my happy expression and I find myself uncharacteristically shuffling my feet as I wait for a response from the girl.
She finally sighs after a minute of silence, "hello Alice." She says plainly.
I'm glad that she at least acknowledged me. "How is your arm?"
"It's fine. A little sore." She says as she looks at it for a moment.
"Do you have your medicine with you?" I ask quickly, not liking that she is hurting.
"No, I'll be fine though." She is keeping her eyes mostly trained on the book in front of her and it's making me feel guiltier by the minute.
After another moment of silence, I decide to sit across from her, even though she's making it obvious she does not want to be around me.
"I'm sorry about this morning." I tell her softly. "I didn't mean to come across as curt." I explain as I pick at a leaf that floated down at some point that day.
When I finally look up, I'm surprised to find that she is studying me closely. "I just don't get it." She finally says.
"Get what?" I ask all too quickly, just happy that she is talking to me.
"It's not hard to pick up on the fact that you and your family are close and don't interact with anyone. Other than the rare class project or whatever. You always come in together, eat lunch together, and then leave together. You make no attempt to talk to anyone else, or invite anyone else to talk to you. So…?"
She lets the unasked question hang in the air between us. She wants to know why I choose to talk to her.
I mull over my words very carefully. Because I chose to seek out Isabella, I could not really see into the future on this conversation to better prepare myself with a response. I want to make sure that I give her an honest and sufficient answer, but I also need to make sure that my response does not lead to more probing questions that she is not ready for just yet.
When too many moments seem to pass for her liking, she gets frustrated and moves to begin packing her things to leave.
"Isabella, wait!" I plead with her. What is this human doing to me?! "Please give me a chance to explain."
She sits back down, but does not say anything, keeping her backpack on her shoulder, at the ready to leave.
"It's definitely no secret that my family and I are close. And yes, it is true that we rarely see reason to interact with anyone else either." I pause, wanting to phrase my next statement in the lightest way possible. But it's still too long of a moment for Isabella.
"So, what? Am I just some community service project then? You felt bad for the queer new girl that everyone else is talking about?" She demands, obviously affected by the way people have been treating her, even if she does well at hiding it.
"No!" I'm quick to answer her, "that's not it at all!" I tell her earnestly, trying to make sure that she can see the sincerity and truth in my eyes.
"Then what is it? Cause I don't need anyone's charity. I'm perfectly content being alone." She finishes much softer. Her eyes, however, give away the anguish behind her last statement.
"I don't think that's true." I just barely whisper to her, trying to take some of the focus off myself for a moment, before I'm forced to say too much.
"Well it is. I don't need you, I don't need my dad. I don't need anybody!" She snaps, before standing up and storming deeper into the woods.
The bell is ringing in the distance, but Isabella is walking further from the school. "What about class?" I call after her, pursuing her.
"Just leave me alone Alice." She is quick to reply, her voice sounding broken, before she takes off in a jog.
I stop in my tracks and feel my cold heart shatter. Good job, Alice. You've hurt her. Again.