Summary: The war between Jotunheim and Asgard draws to a close, but thanks to a horrible twist of Fate (or perhaps not), the nameless runt of Laufey-King is not discovered by Odin and so begins a remarkable journey of life that should not have been. Jotun!Loki AU. Set pre-/during-/after Thor/Avengers Assemble. MCU-verse only.
Warnings: ANGST! Loki-whump! Language, adult situations, violence, child abuse, dub-con, sexual assault (also of a minor), substance abuse, one abortion scene (sort of), slavery, sex trade (maybe), some mild original character/Loki M/M pairings. Also F/M pairings.
Comments: This is not a slash fic. Sorry. It's Loki-centric, although I definitely show the rest of the Avengers and etc. Please review! Constructive criticism welcome.
Disclaimer: I do not own Avengers. Marvel owns it. I do not get paid for this piece of work. Sadly, but understandably. LOL.
I seriously apologize for this delayed and crappy chapter. Life has been kinda blah lately and I can't seem to write for the life of me. Thanks to InsolentKatt and her accident/run in with a bus, I am able to finish this chapter in a manner of speaking.
Inspirational Music: Assassin's Creed: Unity and others, Port Blue, Machinarium
Quoted Stuff in this Chappie:
Gerard Manley Hopkins quote
Sufjan Stevens "The Lakes of Canada"
Gordon Lightfoot "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"
The Wilderness of Manitoba "The Escape"
The Kramdens "Laura's Waltz"
Thanks to all reviewers who are so patient and encouraging in their comments towards myself. This story is far from perfect and feels like its far from over, so thanks for hanging in there guys! I so appreciate you all!
Thanks to: lalala, Glitter Queen, zippy zany, Elizabeth, Freedom2READ, wbss21, vincent1875, Chiharu-angel, InsolentKatt,
This chapter is dedicated to my awesome-possum friend (and fellow Loki fangirl), Katt, who despite her serious accident with a bus continued to encourage me to finish this horrific chapter comprised of writer's block pain.
Distortions In Time
Chapter 76
Refuge
[…the World That Is borders the World That Is Not…]
[…that Which Is Seen washes against the shores of that Which Is Unseen…]
[…overlaying and underlying…]
[…the song of the stars, the voices of the spirits ring out…]
[…and those close to those infinite powers…]
[…flare out and burn…]
The Heimsrsal of Jotunheim roams freely, it is said, unhindered and wild as the icy breezes which race across the flat, snowy stretches of that cold Realm. The Spirit of Muspelheim rages and roars with thunderous energy, birthing its never-ending fires which course through its enflamed world. Vanaheim's Voice works hard for its peace and Alfheim's Aegis stands aloof – a white, pure soul, lofty in its aspirations. Others stars, other voices fill the Void, the dark spaces in between, but there stand nine great souls, who, born at the dawn of time, burned brighter and flourished longer.
There stands one such Realm, one such spirit, protected by the rest – shielded. The Realm Eternally Sheltered and, in its turn, it bends over its Realm, the Realm of Midgard, and covers its worlds with soft wings, birthing life in multitudinous forms. A Realm of Life, a Realm of treasures, forever treasured.
[…one quiet corner…]
[…of a the universe…]
[…in a quiet galaxy…]
[…on a peripheral planet…]
[…Fate is coming…]
[…it is…]
The forest of pines and spruce and other deciduous stood silent in the early spring night. Still cool from the harsh winter which even now reluctantly loosened its group on the northern landscape, the woods lay empty now, awaiting the full growth of spring and the brighter promise of summer. Melting snows ran down the rocks, between the grey crevices from the many small lakes, engorging the small streams and feeding into the vast, dark lake.
[…silence reigns on Midgard…]
[…but not really…]
[…here, here…]
Winter is a quiet season, muffled by snow and the blast of icy wind, yet spring, even early, wakes up the world with the cry of the hawk and the eagle, the growl of the waking bear and migrating wolves. As the sun sets, however, the chattering squirrels and chirping birds slowly fall silent as sleep claims them and all that remains is the wind which rattles the branches of the as yet naked trees. Rising slowly over the seemingly barren land, the moon soars, coating everything in silver and the stars shine hard as jewels, revealed clearly through the ragged wisps of cloud.
[…here, here…]
Suddenly, the wooded and rocky shore of the lake twisted, shimmered – bent – and there was an awful, rising tension in the air. Stones rose. A vee of wild geese disappeared momentarily only to reappear further down in the water. The clouds swirled slowly as though stirred by a contrary wind.
Silence broke with a shriek as the air twisted apart, rent by invisible forces. A seam appeared, spitting out a small, grey, bullet-shaped ship and then snapped shut.
[…silence fell…]
[…on Midgard…]
[…all nature waited with bated breath…]
[…the Soul of Midgard…]
[…stirred…]
He woke to cold. Cold did not matter. He was used to that. In fact, he thought hazily, it is… comforting in some way… The thought slipped away, like sand running through his fingers.
Cold. Cold and pain. He could not move, could barely think, could not turn… There was only barely registered realizations.
Cold. Cold and pain and hard ground. Rocky ground from which he could not rise. Pinned like an insect, he lay there and just was.
Just to be. That is a gift.
-0-0-0-
When consciousness came upon him next, there was still cold and pain and hard ground – but there were other things too. Light and dark, shifting shadows, pale moonlight and quiet voices.
He was not alone.
Panic, visions of suffocating walls and faceless guards, welled up within him – yet attempting to rise only brought more pain and then darkness.
-0-0-0-
He was not alone. Not attempting to open his eyes again, he let the world around him stabilize and, opening his awareness with his newly restored magick, allowed the engulfing wave of pain wash over him. Burned raw from the excess of power, his nerves screamed. A familiar feeling. He had felt much the same before…
Before…
The thought escaped him momentarily until the world shifted, altered a little and he was back in a forgotten sunken city. Meerauk. Yes. Meerauk. After Meerauk. After his journey to Meerauk within the path of the spirits. He could hear Healer Hlorin lecturing him, his silver, crackling voice repeating, fading and flaring: "Overused magickal pathways in the flesh and the spirit had become sensitive as they were stretched beyond the usual capacity. Through pain, one grows."
Through pain.
He had done it again then. Overwhelmed his own maximum capabilities in one massive blast and had arrived to the world of cold and pain and hard ground. Of moonlight and shadows.
A soft world teeming with living things. He could feel them. Hear them, see them and smell them, pressing down on all of his senses. Below him in the hardened ground, sleeping… about him, the growing things and the hibernating creatures and those wild things that roved in the night. The heartbeat of life.
…rest…
A soft admonition with a gentle voice, slightly scolding with only a hint of power.
…rest…
Mother…. He thought disjointedly. Frigga and Loki. He remembered then – with a flare of memory, his name, his past, his mother, her tears and disappointment. There had been a young man named Loki who loved his mother dearly and treasured his family. He had wanted to save her, to show his worth, to protect his home and in the end…
In the end, I lost it all.
…no…
…dear heart…
…that which is lost, may yet be found…
…that which is broken, may yet be healed…
…that which is dead, may yet find life…
…rest, dear heart, rest…
Loki could feel the power – green and vibrant – gently pass over him, through him. A brief respite.
Mother…
He was not alone. He was sheltered. He was safe.
She is here.
-0-0-0-
When Loki next woke, he was no longer on the cold, hard ground. He was lying on his side, more or less curled up uncomfortably on a narrow couch. A narrow couch with lumpy padding. A blanket of some dark fluffy material covered him and beneath his head was a small pillow.
For a moment, the world rocked from side to side as though he were an infant in a cradle, and then it rested upon its center and Loki found enough strength to raise his arm, only to discover that one of his arms appeared to be tethered by some thin cording. Loki peered closer attempting to make sense of the small world around him.
A door. Escape.
The world dimmed, shifting to a filmy purple-blue and from nowhere a kind of horn sounded, blaring discordantly, making him jump and jerk.
Thirst. Water. Something. His mouth was not working properly. Had they taken away his voice? Loki's panic skyrocketed as he realized that he could not speak.
Where was – was not – Mother… Frigga… where… No. No. Nononono. He could not go back again – by Hel, he could not…
-a mute vaetki from another time-
-another time, another place, another person-
-and yet not-
"What's happening?" a nearby voice asked.
"He's awake," another voice said. "I don't think he's happy."
"Talk to him, idiot," the first voice answered sharply. "He's all freaked out and stuff."
"Something's not right."
"What?" asked the first, light tension lacing their tone.
"Like… he's tripping, I think."
"Drugs…" A sigh emanated from somewhere. "Let me see."
Shifting voices which swirled around on carefree breezes. If he looked hard enough, he could see the trails of sound, of blue and yellow strands of music. Little people danced along the pathways… A dark shadow loomed, like a blanket of night un-scrolling across the sky.
Loki flinched away as something heavy and cold pressed against his forehead.
"Detox." A pause. "Fuck."
"So he's tripping."
"You think?"
"This is bad."
"It's just started. Obviously he's needing some kind of a fix. I'll call Karl and figure out what. You keep him cool. You know the drill. The saline will keep him hydrated and balance things out, but we'll need the good stuff."
"And soon."
"And soon," echoed the first.
Soon. Loki closed his eyes suddenly. As the world swayed about him, he felt a rising urge to spew his guts. Except his guts were empty. Empty.
The word roiled about, snaked about, curled up in his head and lurked.
Empty.
He was empty and there was nothing between him and the emptiness. It lay before him now: the dark land, the Void. Receding into the distances, the voices of the others faded, their unintelligible words jumbled about.
Let them take what they wish, for they will find naught. Let them come and go, for there is nothing. There is only the emptiness and I have nothing left to give.
Loki escaped the only way he knew well.
He flew among the stars.
-0-0-0-
He was so thirsty. So, so thirsty. His mouth felt as dry and bitter as the volcanic sands of Svartalfheim. There were memories. Long ago, not so long ago, they had discovered that as a creature of ice, when in his natural form, heat drove him wild.
So thirsty.
He had begged. Yet, when he had found enough energy to cry out, no one had deigned to answer. There had only been laughter.
Opening his eyes, a world of jarring reds and oranges and yellows swirled about him, burning his vision and heating his skin. Thrashing weakly, Loki attempted to rise, only to find a hand pressing his head back firmly. The hard rim of cool glass touched his lips and the barest trickle of lukewarm water passed his cracked lips.
"Not too fast," someone instructed. "His stomach won't handle it."
"He's got an IV… I don't get it."
"Dry mouth. Just another symptom."
"Shit. What do we do?"
A silence, then the first voice said muttered:
"We drive faster.
-0-0-0-
Light. Dark. Light. Dark. Light, dark, light, dark. Bars of dull yellow light passed over his eyelids and when he opened his eyes, there seemed to be no change. Ancient memories of honeycomb cells and claustrophobic cells swamped him – bound, trammeled, enclosed, entombed.
…dear heart, rest…
Who are they? Who are they? What do they want? What do they search for? Where are they taking me?
…peace…
…we are connected…
…in the end…
…our lives are woven together in the tapestry…
…this is Fate…
…and we are His children…
…we are one…
So… I was meant to come here. There is something I must do. I must remember. Thor. I must… must remember.
…there is time...
…little, yet there is…
…there is time…
For a moment, he lay there, silent. Watching the passing shadows. Shadows, he now saw as his eyes adjusted to the dimness, which passed over glass and frames of glinting metal. A vehicle. Have I thought that thought before?
Turning his head, he caught a glimpse of a hooded figure, the head nodded up and down gently in a regular rhythm. Obviously the caretaker was asleep, swaying in time with the vehicle's movements. It worried him. He had been reassured, had been told not to worry and yet….
And yet…
It gnawed at him. Memories rose then – memories of aged men and women talking, memories of Healers, memories of a visiting Healer discussing the effects of various mendicants when used over long periods of time. Anxiety. Fear. Dreams and visions. Other signs.
He could not remember. Intellectually, he understood.
And yet...
And yet...
Twisting slightly, Loki raised a shaking hand and stared at it. Just watching his trembling fingers, the warrior-mage knew he was in no shape for walking, running, any form of escape, much less battle.
I have no choice but to trust. For now.
…sleep…
"You k-k-keep saying th-thhat," Loki's voice crackled as his irritated retort broke the silence like a gunshot.
The hood snapped upright and long, skinny arms flailed about, gripping the edge of the seat. Shuddering to a sudden halt with grinding gears, the vehicle jerked several times.
"He talked!"
"Of course he can talk, idiot," said the first voice. "He's not brain dead… yet."
"Sh-sh-she tells m-me t'sleep – b-b-but I cannot. I cannot. If I do…" Loki trailed off and shivered, closing his eyes momentarily. "I ss-see them – see… SEE…"
"You've been Wandering."
The vehicle started up again. Loki's eyes watched as the patterns of light and dark, light and dark, began again. Judging by the sound, it was a wheeled contrivance going down a paved road. Not cobbled. Not stones. He had been on worlds with paved roads and great cities erected out of mixed stone and other compounds. Sharda'aa. Vlozh'noi… There were other worlds he had visited when he had been free, carefree… So many worlds.
Have I actually gone to all of them? Or… or…
"I don't think… he knows…"
"He may not be ready," the first voice said. "I'll put on some ambient."
"Ambient is good."
[…music and mendicants…]
[…sound and sense…]
[…motion and stillness…]
[…vehicles that carry the soul to the stars…]
[…some travel farther, some are bound closer…]
[…these are the Stars and their Voices…]
…life is treasure…
…birthed, grown, sheltered…
…we are the caretakers, the spirits…
…look after all of our cousins…
…our sisters and brothers…
…the Voices of the Stars…
…those who speak for us…
[…music and mendicants…]
[…sound and sense…]
[…motion and stillness…]
At some point, the vehicle stopped and the unseen driver rested. There was nothing but the howling wind, occasional slams and shuffling as other vehicles came and went and the rise and fall as vehicles approached, passed by and departed. Like an ocean, waves drawing in and receding.
They were not far from the main road. A kind of rest stop, he concluded. He lay there and listened and wished and dreamed. Lulled by the rise and fall of the vehicles, Loki allowed himself to drift off into a light doze.
A shuffle. Rustling. Some weight pushed against the back of Loki's makeshift bed. Jerking awake and gasping as shreds of Void and the Stars faded, Loki tensed. Pulling away, he raised his left hand only to find it tethered again. Frantically, he pulled and clawed at the thin cording, only to be stopped by gentle fingers. A round, pale face came into view. A boy's face – a boy with longish, straight, dark-brown hair which fell about his face, obscuring blue-green eyes. Old eyes.
"Hey, man, hey…" The boy frowned as he watched Loki's fingers worry at the cord. "Um, you might not wanna… touch that…"
"Wha-at…" Loki managed to find enough air and power to voice the question, after which he sank back, unable to move, now spent.
"It's an IV, you know?"
A pause.
"Maybe not. I mean. It's, uh, um…"
"It's not a restraint," the voice from the front said.
"No, no…" The boy leaned forward and pulled up Loki's sleeve, revealing that the cord was in fact attached to a metal piece entering his arm like a pin. "It's a needle and it's, um, feeding you. You need food, man."
Man. I am not a man. I am a monster, Loki thought, his world for a few seconds whirling about disorienting, warping the young man's voice. Then it settled and sight and sound seeped back.
He could hear himself screaming at Odin from another time and place.
-Why did you not tell me from the beginning? Did you not trust me? Is that it? Were you wanting to see if I would show my true savage colours?-
Loki twisted then, turned away, forcing the memory down. No, he told himself, not here. Not now. There is no time. There is no time…
"Wh-" He tried again. "Whe-" Faltered and then managed to get it out somehow, exhausting the last of his reserves: "Where?"
"Where? Where are we?"
"He probably wants to know where he is," the voice up front commented. "I would."
"We're on Earth. Terra. Don't worry. You're safe for now."
You are safe. For now. Loki sighed and, closing his eyes, allowed himself to drift off. Right. She said that before. Frigga. Mother. The Stars…
He could still hear her voice.
….rest…
[…over the bent…]
[…World broods with warm breast and ah! Bright wings…]
He burned hot as a blazing star. He burned as cold as the empty spaces of the Void. He was everything. He was nothing.
Once upon a time, he had been Loki. Loki, a creature of nothing. Then he had been others. So many faces. So many names. Then he was Loki. After, not before. It was all twisted.
Time twisted and memories, surfacing and submerging, swirled slowly, pulling his consciousness in and out of reality, in and out of memory.
What was memory? Memory was a vault filled with treasure. Was he just another one of those? Memory was a warm embrace and the scent of flower tea and cordials and a light voice. Memory was battling at the side of Thor. Surely those were all memories.
What was reality? Reality was twisted and warped. Lines of dark and light, repeating patterns, sweat and vomit and pain. Fatigue… and driving need. A need for what, he did not know. It wracked him, coming and going in waves, and all he could do was wait.
Faces hovered over him. Some he knew. The face of the Inquisitor deceptively smiling. Odin's aloof visage. Mal's saddened face. Some he did not know. The boy? His companion? A gruff-looking bearded man.
Words came and went, washing over him in bits and pieces.
Soft fingers drifted over his dark markings, tracing the edges and the curves with devotion, with awe, with love. Her voice, strong and rough, spoke then.
"You're beautiful."
Mal. She had accepted, where he had rejected. She had seen what he had been blind to. Mal. Mal had bid him farewell. Was it forever?
There was someone else in the room, softly speaking, asking him questions. Slipping into his consciousness like a snake, it whispered. Casual and relaxed, deceptively whimsical and light.
"What did she say?"
"…I can only be here for a short time. You have other places to be."
That's what she had said, leaning over him, gently brushing his hair away from his blue skin, still revealed. He was still blue-skinned. Loki glanced down at his hands. No. Purple now. Been purple for some time now. The others did not seem worried though and had made no comment. Perhaps he was not purple.
"What else did she say?"
"There is not enough time," she had seemed calm, but her eyes and gleamed with unshed tears. "I know… we didn't have enough time. We never did."
She had squeezed his hand and she had put something… Loki tugged at his clothing. New clothing. Where… where…
"We got you new clothes," the boy spoke up. "Your stuff is in a duffle under your bed. Prison garb, check. Boots, check. And socks. And a small flash drive. Well, high tech flash drive. Whatever they use 'up there'."
"There is nothing to be afraid of," the soft voice continued. Loki turned and froze at the sight of the dark uniform, the simple silver and platinum insignia, the white skin and pale, blue eyes and unnaturally grey-white hair.
Wen. Inquisitor Wen. The sight of his interrogator brought on the memories. Wen's questions, Wen's glances, Wen's manipulations, Wen's touches. Stomach twisting and roiling at the memory, Loki found himself leaning to the side of the bed and coughing up what little water he had retained in his belly. Magickally, it seemed, a tin bowl appeared beneath his head as he lay there helplessly vomiting.
"It's gonna get worse," the young man said to the other who sat up front. "It's gonna get worse before it gets better."
"It always does," was the short reply.
Loki, after several long minutes, found the strength to push himself back, brushing away the support of his helper. He knew what they spoke of and felt ill of the thought. Like those who had stumbled into Poison Paradise –
-the dancing girls-
-their sparkling heels kicking towards the stars-
He was one of them. The lotus eaters, the fire drinkers, the spirit callers. The other voice is right, he told himself, it will get worse before it gets better. It always does.
Leaning back, Loki stared up at the nondescript velvet looking ceiling to the small vehicle he was in. It felt small. A longish square. Moving very fast though, judging by the passing trees and posts and fences and empty vistas of muddy fields and still barren forests.
It was difficult to grasp. He closed his eyes.
Later. Later…
-Look for me another day
I feel that I could change
I feel that I could change
There's a sudden joy that's like
A fish, a moving light
I thought I saw it
Rowing on the lakes of Canada-
Music filtered in through his dreams, not the ethereal yet piercing songs of the stars. It was solid and grounded, roughened and real. Loki chased after it in his dreams, chased until it brought him home.
-I feel that I could change-
When he woke next, Loki felt more alive than he had in a long time. Movement was sluggish, reality was distorted and the world spun about him like a child's top, yet, for the first time in a while, Loki felt something akin to hope. He knew the long journey to recovery had only just begun, yet perhaps he would survive it, survive it long enough to warn Thor.
Thor. He could remember the most important thing: Thor needed to know. The Mad Titan was coming. The Voice of the Void. He was coming. The Chitauri, the Other… the others.
With the aid of the boy, Loki was able to pry himself up into a seated position, resting his cheek against what appeared to be cool glass.
That was when he noticed the details which had slipped his attention earlier. How the small room shook and vibrated with the rough power of an engine. How the light falling upon him passed over with shifting regular patterns. He was, Loki realized, in a conveyance of some kind. Judging by the speed of the shadows passing over him, it was not a fast vehicle, but it could achieve a steady pace.
"You look… a bit… better…" The boy said, leaning forward to check Loki again. "More alive. Sorta."
"Relatively speaking," said the apparent driver seated in the left front seat. "He's got a long way to go – and not enough time."
"Time… no time…" Loki seized those words and groaned as he tried to sit further upright. "I must-"
"Hey, hey," the young man eased Loki back.
He was stronger than he looked. That or I am still very weak, Loki sighed, feeling more powerless than ever.
"Where do you needta go?"
"I need… I need to find my brother."
"Your brother?" The driver turned then, revealing the calm visage of an young woman. Her eyes, like the boy's, were matter of fact and serene. Someone who stays calm in a crisis, Loki supposed. "You have a brother here?"
"A-Adopted… I mean…" Loki sighed, overwhelmed with the quest now before him.
So much to say, yet what can I say that would make them believe me? Without their help, I will not find Thor in time. Thor…
"I am adopted. He is… he is not like me…"
"OK…" The dark-haired boy blinked. "Where is he?"
"I-I-I know not," Loki heaved yet another sigh. "I only know he is on M-m-midgard – on Terra, Earth… whatever you call it."
"Midgard," repeated the girl thoughtfully. "That is an old name indeed. An old name from long ago." She cocked her head. "Sounds Asgardian, wouldn't you say, Jace?"
"You're asking me?" Jace rolled his eyes then, good-humouredly. "I'm the one who's asleep in class."
"Yeah," the girl deadpanned. "What was I thinking?"
There was silence then Loki frowned.
"What does Midgard know of Asgard?"
"Uhhh…" The two glanced at each other before meeting Loki's eyes calmly. "The humans don't know much. But there are others around." The boy scratched his head and turned to the girl.
"Others." Loki echoed, coughing a little as the back of his throat tickled.
Leaning forward, the boy offered him a sip of warm water. Even the barest trickle felt heavy in his stomach and the energy necessary to swallow left Loki breathless. He cursed his weak state, mentally, lacking the spare power to voice his disgust.
"Non-humans. Some visit, some stay." The girl was saying.
"Mildy, there're bunches all over. Right?" the boy asked.
"I thought Asgard did not permit such activities." Loki blinked as the boy's blue-green eyes flared an eerie red and then black.
"There are some who fear Asgard," the young woman agreed. Mildy. She chuckled then, "Some have nothing to lose and others are the rebels of the universe. Pirates and the like."
Loki closed his eyes and tried to remember what his father – Odin – his father, yes. What his father had said in the councils about the pirates who roamed freely through the Realms and galaxies. A sickness. That was how the Asgardians viewed the Marauders' menace. A sickness that had to be purged for the safety of all peaceable sentients. There were others. Other pirate bands as well. Midgard would be, to them, a forbidden fruit.
A long silence ensued and a good half hour passed before Loki heaved a sigh, attempted to corral his wandering memories and focus on the issue at hand.
"So, there are others who live on this planet. You two are not humans then," he asked.
"Yeah, no. To the humans, Asgard is a fairy tale. A myth. To others in the know, Asgard is the Golden Realm, top dog of the Nine. Has proprietary interest in Midgard," the girl checked a small mirror in front of the broad fore-window and then the vehicle swayed a little as it appeared to veer a little to the right. "Other than that, we don't know much, really. We don't pay attention much to matters off-world. Unless they come to us."
"I see."
Pause. Another song on the vehicles comm started up softly and Loki followed a few lines of melody before realizing that someone had spoken up.
"I don't think he got it," Jace was saying. "Yo. Buddy."
"What?" Loki twitched away from the light touch of the boy's hand upon the blanket.
"Your brother, I assume, landed on Earth somewhere." Mildy repeated patiently.
"His name is Thor," Loki said softly. He closed his eyes, took several deep breaths before continuing. "Prince Thor of Asgard."
"Thor?" Jace glanced at the girl. "Mildy – you think it's Thor… that new blond superhero or mutant or whatever?"
"With the US government or whatever, right?"
"Yeah."
"Superhero?" Loki asked.
"Where's he at then?" Mildy mused. "New York?"
"Well, Iron Man's in New York. He'd know, eh."
"I don't like it. Going to them is…"
"Superhero? Iron Man?" Loki interjected. "Who-"
"We could drop him off and skedaddle," Jace suggested. "There's a company in New York where we could lay low – or we could just transport back here-"
"And show up on Stark's infernal radars?" snorted Mildy. "I think not."
"Stark?" Loki weakly glared at Jace, now thoroughly exasperated. "Who do you speak of?"
There was a short silence, allowing the rumble of the engine and the light vibration of the glass and the quiet whoosh of the heater to take over. Another vehicle whizzed past, honking loudly, and then night fell again as the vehicle's twin aft-lights faded in the distance. Loki's gaze darted from the boy to the dark head of the girl up front.
"Who…?"
"This is a new era," the girl, Mildy, finally said, voice soft. "It's a time of conflict and peace, a time of great evil and great good. It's all on the news nowadays – every day. Villains and superheroes duking it out."
"Duking…" Loki echoed, puzzled.
"Fighting for power, for dominance, for the people and the treasures of this planet."
"Thor is one of them," said the boy. "Appeared two years ago or so and every now and then, he shows up on the news. Like Captain America and Iron Man."
"He-he is t-taking over the planet?" Loki asked, remembering the Thor of old – confident, powerful and headstrong.
"No, no," Mildy shook her head with a laugh. "Unless you count girls' hearts as the planet. No. He's one of the people that save it."
"Of course," Loki muttered to himself sourly. He turned away and stared morosely out the window to his right. "He would be."
"He doesn't have super powers, really," the boy said. "He's got… muscles though. Like, almost the size of my head! And he's never afraid – and he just does his job and he's gone. He's so cool."
"Hm."
"I suppose you guys had brotherly competition, huh," Mildy smiled sympathetically.
"You – you could s-say that," Loki glared out his window and watched the stark, empty trees lining the road recede behind them.
He could not hold onto the annoyance though. It was too great to carry and fatigue already tugged upon his eyelids. Sleep.
…sleep…
…little one…
…rest…
"Anyways," Mildy said, returning to their original topic, "Thor works for SHIELD, a government agency – and I'm sure that if we get you to Stark – the guy who is Iron Man – you could get to Thor no problem."
"Well, it'll be a hassle-"
"But nothing to worry about," Mildy reassured Loki who nodded reluctantly. "You just rest. We'll drive you over the border and get you to New York at least."
"The border?" Loki asked slowly, feeling fatigue weigh even more heavily upon him than usual.
"You fell on the wrong end of the lake," Jace smiled then. "But it was a good place, in the end. They'll have gotten there by now, for sure… but there won't be any hint as to your arrival on Superior."
"Superior?" He was fighting to stay awake now. A losing battle, he feared.
"We'll talk more later," Mildy said softly. "Rest."
"Yeah and-"
"Jace."
"'Kay, 'kay," Jace's sigh was the last thing Loki heard.
[…Fate is coming…]
[…it is…]
[…coming…]
He dreamed.
[…it is…]
[…coming…]
Reverberating from the deep, from the abyss of the darkest parts of space, the voice of the Titan murmured whispered threats. All of his life he had heard voices. Now he understood after a fashion. The truth.
The truth is…
Thought was a coiling string which he could only tenuously cling to, following its steadily unraveling threads, hoping to find the logic in the moment. Memory was a jumble of painful shards only barely softened by time.
The truth is that He was there all along. He was there all along in the darkness – manipulating and taunting and drawing all things who could hear his voice to him. Within his presence, all that is good shrinks away and evil blossoms under his tender care. Anxieties, fears, ambitions and hatreds grow and take root.
And he, Loki, was one of them. Or could have been one of them.
Sometimes, he saw through the cracks and edges of the world and in the glistening starlight, caught glimpses of another life, another Loki. A dark Loki, alone and afraid and angry.
Was it him of the future? Or him in another time and space? It is frightening – but there is comfort as well. He knew the dangers and the pitfalls; now he understood where he stood – his role, his charge, his Fate – to stand on the edge and guard the borders of Reality and the Otherworlds. Loki, the one who haunted the Shadow-realms and straddled the worlds of grey.
There were, after all, other voices. The Voices of the Stars and those blessed (and cursed) to speak and act for them. Perhaps, in the end, this is what Odin and Frigga saw. Perhaps this is what Iormungand and Miot'vithr spoke of… Perhaps, it is what Jotunheim – and all of the Realms need.
Loki spun away, wrapped in golds and blues and plummeted, wingless, into the depths of cold dark waters.
Waters closed over his head, burying him in its icy arms, muffling all sound until all he could hear was the thrum-thrum of Life and the heartbeat of the world.
-Lake Huron rolls, Superior sings
In the rooms of her ice-water mansion
Old Michigan steams like a young man's dreams
The islands and bays are for sportsmen
And farther below, Lake Ontario
Takes in what Lake Erie can send her
And the iron boats go as the mariners all know
With the gales of November remembered-
"You said border," Loki managed to rasp out at some point in time.
"We're n-not in the same cou-cou-country as Thor?"
"There's no single world government in place," Mildy explained. "Not that you're stuck in one country, necessarily. You can travel other places with proper documentation."
"Yeah, Thor goes everywhere. Like Iron Man and Captain America, you know."
"Jace. How would he know?"
"Oh. Right."
-0-0-0-
"It's a light broth. It's probably gonna make you feel sick, but…"
"A chicken broth." Pause. "Mildy, does he know what a chicken is?"
"Jace."
"Uh. Sorry…"
-0-0-0-
"Never mind Jace," Mildy was saying. "He's a kid." A pause. "Well, I say kid, but he ought to know better, really."
"Where – where are we now?" Loki asked drowsily as his physical need for sleep waged war with his insomnia.
"Almost at a city – where we will get your papers. They'll be ready. We'll just need a photograph."
"We'll have to prop you up and make you look a bit more alive looking," Jace grinned. "You're pale."
Loki looked down at his skin. It was white. The usual white. Glancing over at the windows' faint reflection, he realized that his coloration was his usual Asgardian one – pale skin, brilliant green eyes and long, curling black hair slicked back. The spells he had placed upon himself were temporarily back in effect. But how long… if Thor sees this… His gut twisted and he turned abruptly away from his false reflection, trying to avoid Jace's knowing gaze.
"I look as though-" A pause. "As though I-I am at death's door," Loki finally said.
"Well, you were and if you're not careful, you will be," Mildy shook her head. "You're not out of the woods yet."
"Speaking of woods," Jace sighed. "Who else is tired of the same old winter tree landscape?"
"It's spring!" Mildy protested.
"Barely!"
As the two bickered, Loki leaned back and watched the obviously siblings banter back and forth good-naturedly. Once upon a time, Thor and he had argued similarly. There had been the usual jabs successfully wielded by himself. Sif had never been pleased by Loki's wit and mischief although Thor had never taken umbrage at Loki's antics. Thor himself could get up to his own brand of foolishness without encouragement from Loki.
How many years has it been since we last saw each other? That day – that day we went to Jotunheim… Has Thor changed? Has he grown? Has he kept to his usual heroic image? Has he learned to think before he speaks? Loki tried to image a grown up Thor. It made his head hurt to imagine it.
Perhaps not.
Or perhaps, you are just afraid to be the one left behind. The one who is worthless, the one who never learns. After all, throughout your entire life you were always the one who had the common sense, the worldly wisdom, the intelligence to keep out of trouble when necessary… and now. Perhaps… Thor has no need for you. Neither will Odin. Or Frigga.
Not Frigga, Loki told himself.
Fingers tightening on his blanket, Loki attempted to suppress his worries and fears, his rising inner panic and paranoia.
Even worse, his dark self whispered. What if your magick fails you and Thor sees you for what you truly are? Perhaps he will end your misery and carry out his promises so long ago…
-I will hunt them all down and slay them all-
No. Loki forced himself to breathe again. No. That will not happen. It will not. It will not… It must not…
-Will you wait for me
Or will you run
Out of the darkness and into the sun
Innocent fools in the bed that we made
Frozen in shadows of sheets where we lay
I am a demon with you by my side
Can't bare my sight of myself and my blind-
With each passing hour, the empty wilderness began to fill with sporadic homesteads. Farms, villages and hamlets dotted their path and with it came more passing vehicles similar to theirs (some smaller, some larger), inns and wayside eateries. Loki did not leave the 'van' as Jace called it and his fare was relegated to light broth, water and the packets of nutrition which Jace deftly handled. Jace is, Loki thought, older than he looks and more experienced than he seems. However, no chance to ask Jace about his life and background arose. Mildy seemed equally close-mouthed on the subject. Loki understood. A race hiding behind another. He knew all too well the habits one adopted in order to make oneself a new life.
The clouds, on occasion, cleared away, revealing wide unhindered blue skies with a bright sun which drove Loki underneath the sheets. Eyes accustomed to dimmer lighting and darker rooms, the glinting of sunlight off remaining snow and the reflective surfaces about it gave him headaches.
In between the increasingly more frequent bouts of fever, dizziness and nausea, Loki watched a beautiful wilderness pass. It was spring after a hard winter, Mildy had said. Finally.
Then the cities began to come and go, building up from small groups of homes and a variety of marketplaces within vast concrete blocks ('malls', Jace called them, 'box stores'). There were many words spoken which Loki could barely comprehend. An entirely new lexicon to encompass an alien world – 'strip mall' (not to be confused with a 'strip joint'), 'suburbs' (also known as the ''burbs'), 'turn offs' (not related to 'turn ons', apparently) and other things.
Finally, Jace began to point out blue signs which heralded the arrival of the city which they had been aiming for. Loki allowed the increasingly concrete and stone world of a small metropolis pass by without comment, glad to be able to just lay back and watch the blinking lights, the occasional blaring horns, the accompanying curses on the part of Mildy and the cloudy worlds reflected in the tall glass buildings erected on either sides of the road down which they traveled.
'Sky-scrapers', Jace called them. Loki thought it fitting. He had, of course, seen taller, but there was something enchanting in the odd juxtaposition of the clear glass and metal bearing the reflections of the clouds and skies. This world, he mused, is purer than some.
Images swirled in then – memories of Sharda'aa and the mining colony he had visited with Nesta. Nesta. That brought back V'slozh'noi. V'slozh'noi, Nesta and Mal. It pained him to remember.
Loki closed his eyes.
Mal.
He had tried to reach out to her, but she as too distant from him and there was no sense of her anywhere.
Mal. He thought desperately. Do not go where I cannot follow…
- Today there's a mist on the river.
Tomorrow the sun's gonna shine.
Yesterday's gone and the dream that I had
Will be quietly mine…-
"Mildy's going in," Jace's voice sounded soft in the dark as the two waited in the van in the underground lot in which Mildly had parked the dark van. "Karl'll probably come down and check you over. Get you a fix if he thinks best."
"Karl?" Loki tested the foreign name upon his tongue slowly, feeling more confused and fatigued than ever. He sighed.
"Karl. He knows… he's an, uh, elder, I guess. I dunno what you'd call him, but he can help. Karl has everything."
"Th-th-the papers?"
"Those too."
Loki listened to the wind whistle past one of the cracked open windows, the far off plink-plink of dripping water, the crunching of tires as various cars passed them by, looking for places to park and the distant sound of honking. Time seemed to pass slowly and anxiety began to mount again as Jace glanced at his watch for the fourth time.
"She is – she is late." Loki shifted uneasily, glancing out of the misting windows.
"Well, he may not be in yet. It's not even breakfast time-"
"Sh-sh-she is in trouble-"
"No. She isn't."
"W-we should go-"
"Loki, dude. We can't go anywhere. Not like this anyways."
"Can you not d-drive?"
"Well," Jace hesitated before allowing, "Yeah. At a pinch, but hey – man – look. I'm kinda young looking and they'd pull me over in a heartbeat for joy-riding or whatever and then they'd see you and who knows what'd happen then."
"Joy-riding?"
"It means – it – never mind. Look. Here, I'll send her a quick text."
"Can you not call her?"
Jace gave Loki a look. Before Jace could flick on his phone, the little machine gave a harsh beeping sound, startling Loki. Flinching away from the seemingly loud tone, Loki found himself hard pressed to calm himself down, gasping for air as his unsettled nerves screamed in panic and pain.
"It's Mildy. She wants to know if I would like a cappuccino," Jace grinned then. "Karl's in. Just grabbing a cam and his stuff and he'll be here in a jiffy. It'll be over before you know it, Loki."
"They always say that."
"Yeah," nodded Jace ruefully. "I guess they do."
-0-0-0-
Loki.
He woke suddenly. Instantly alert and muscles tensing as he lay there in the dark and took stock of his surroundings, he slowly recalled where he was. With a short groan of frustration, Thor pulled himself up and propped himself on an elbow, turning to flick on the small light by his bed.
Thor, Crown Prince of Asgard and current employee of SHIELD, glanced around the Spartan room – at the nondescript grey-blue walls, the rough empty dark-blue carpeted floor, the half-open closet doors revealing his neat stacks of uniforms, the narrow window which revealed only a small square of blue-pink sky. Morning, he realized. Early morning.
Sighing, he hoisted himself further upward, leaned against the simple black headboard of his bed and contemplated the grey-blue ceiling above him. Everything was indistinct in the early morning light, fuzzy-edged and shadowed like his thoughts. Thoughts he could barely collect.
What… Thor frowned. What was that…
His first impulse was to rise, to open his cabin's door and look down the hall, to peer out the window, but the young man stilled himself, forced himself to stay calm and think things through.
It is morning, Thor noted. Morning, which means few will be out and about on SHIELD's flying fortress. The Helicarrier, he corrected himself. Security being what it is and since Natasha and Clint have not contacted me, nor has there been an alarm, it was not an intruder.
Stay calm and think things through. That was what Adam had said. Adam, the mind healer. Take deep breaths and consider all your options before taking action. Remember that haste can result in hurt. These are habits that are difficult to learn, but are necessary for maturity.
Maturity. That was a topic upon which Odin had elaborated at length many times. Frigga had spoken of 'growing up' and 'making hard decisions' and even Loki had berated his older brother whenever Thor had followed his wilder instincts.
"Why had I not listened to them before?" Thor had wondered aloud once. "Why did it have to take me so long?"
"So," Jane raised an eyebrow, "you have it all figured out now?"
"Well," Thor allowed in chagrin, "not everything."
"I was going to say. You have a long ways to go." Jane tipped her head and smiled encouragingly up at him, her blue eyes meeting his. "But the first step to any solution is admitting you have a problem. It's a good start."
"Things will not get easier?"
"Hmmmm…"
A pause.
"Better in some ways, but it will never be easy. If I told you it was easy to change one's habits," Jane said slowly, "that would be a lie." Pause. "Do you want a lie?"
"No," Thor had replied softly.
Growing up. Maturity. Looking before one leaped. Hard lessons he had endured all his life and now, now it seemed to sink in little by little. There was listening and there was talking. There were Jane and Steve and Adam and Coulson. There were admissions and realizations.
I am capable of mistakes but it is important not to make the same mistake twice. I was not ready. I cannot be everything my father wants me to be, nor must I be. I am my mother's son as much as I am my father's.
So Thor sat in his room and listened to the quiet as his mother had advised him so long ago. He sat there and waited.
It was difficult to hear but the whispers murmured on the edges of his awareness. Frigga and Loki had mentioned them and Odin had once lectured on the Spirits of the Realms and their Voices. They spoke to many but were heard only by a few, those so named the Voices Corporeal – mages and seers and kings. As a child, Thor had attempted a few times to hear what Frigga spoke of, but after a few failures, he had not tried again, dismissing it as fairy-tales or superstitions. Later, Thor recognized the power of the mages and, watching Loki do battle, Thor knew that there was something he was missing – something important. But it was not in his nature to ask for help, to admit weakness and so he had said nothing and so time had passed.
I am capable of mistakes but it is important not to make the same mistake twice.
Now Thor quieted his spirit, slowly cleared his mind and focused on the shaft of pale pinkish blue light filtering into his shadowy room. Focused on the feel of the crinkly white cotton sheets beneath his hands, his deep breaths…
…he is…
…he…
…coming…
…he is coming…
…the…
…on the…
…before the…
…winds…
…wings…
…of the dark…
Gibberish. Garbled gibberish. With a sigh of deep frustration, Thor groaned and banged his head on the head board once before leaning forward to rub his eyes in the palms of his hands. This is impossible.
Someone is coming. Someone is coming on the winds – before the – winds or wings of something dark? What… What…
Rising from his cross-legged position, Thor pulled on his white t-shirt, blue sweater, black jeans, socks, and well-polished boots. Grabbing his wallet, phone and security pass, the blonde-haired superhero left behind the haunting stillness of his room and wandered down the almost halls of the Helicarrier.
It was early morning. The red numbers on his alarm clock had put the time around five in the morning. In the final hours of their watch, the night security shift and the night crew were no doubt looking forward to being relieved. Cleaners and other maintenance crews also passed by, finishing their tasks for the day. Smiling as he made his way upward to the landing strips, Thor nodded at the crew members and guards he knew personally. No one spoke or stopped to talk with him, which suited Thor's mood just fine.
He had much to consider. Who would he call? Coulson. That was an easy answer. What would he say? What could he say?
"Thor."
Swinging around, Thor blinked down, nonplussed as the man he had just been thinking of appeared to materialize at his elbow.
"Coulson," Thor smiled then. "I did not see you there."
"You're deep in thought this morning."
"Yes, I… I was thinking," Thor ended lamely.
"I noticed." Coulson tipped his head. "Want to talk about it?"
"You are not busy?" asked Thor, noting that Coulson was in his usual suit.
Still, Thor's blue eye sharpened as he noticed that Coulson's dark tie was slightly loosened and askew. The top button of the man's collared shirt was undone as well. A rare sight for the seemingly everlastingly tidy man. Off duty then.
"Just got off a job," Coulson smiled. "I've got some time."
"Ahhh… well then, perhaps you will need some coffee?" Thor suggested. "I find that a cup of coffee is most necessary after a quest, uh, mission."
"Coffee sounds great."
As they made their way down to the cafeteria, Coulson related a few interesting tidbits about his trip – something related to a possible alien sighting, which turned out to be mutant hijinks.
"Midgard keeps a steady gaze outward," Thor mused, as he and Coulson took a seat in the cafeteria. "Searching for life elsewhere."
"We think it is there. We have reason to believe it's there. You are living proof."
"There are no doubt others on this planet who do not belong."
"They haven't come forward," Coulson frowned. "I don't blame them. Humans have a history of… intolerance towards each other. Goodness knows how they'd behave around aliens."
"I feel welcomed," Thor shrugged. "When I came before – when I was younger – I also felt welcomed. Midgard is a warm place."
"I'm glad you feel so."
"So, I feel as though it is my charge, to care for everyone here. Asgard has always kept an eye out for Midgard's well-being… and coming here and living amongst you, I feel… even more responsible than ever."
"We can take care of ourselves," Coulson pointed out mildly.
"Indeed," Thor quickly agreed. "Jane keeps reminding me of that as well. And Steve."
"And Steve."
"But, there are some things that Midgard is not yet prepared to face…" Thor shuddered. "Frost Giants and Fire Giants and space pirates and the Skrull and the Kree… Vast empires and Realms of barbarians who have no respect for other peoples' freedoms."
"Hmmm… Well, we'll take them on as they come." Coulson took another quick sip of his coffee. "We have some things up our sleeve." His light eyes slid to the side and he added ruminatively. "Midgard has its own treasures…"
"Have care," Thor said. "My father has many treasures and weapons of great might in his vaults, but danger can come from possessing them…"
He remembered the dead guards encased in ice. The glittering, swirling blue of the Casket. Such feelings of violation and uncertainty… and fear. And in fear and wounded pride, I had lashed out… without thinking what effect it would have upon my Realm and my people.
"We're…" Coulson frowned. "We do not want to cause trouble where there is none. It's just a matter of readiness."
Thor nodded. "I understand that. And yet, I warn you still. Sometimes… sometimes… in the quiet of the night, I can feel it. I can hear it."
"Feel what?" Coulson leaned forward, eyes suddenly sharp like a hawk. "Hear what?"
"Things," Thor finally said, vaguely. "I know that Midgard hides many things that should not have been forgotten and I know that all Realms hold spirits who stand closely at the side of Fate and some say, they know His secrets."
"Thor… We aren't talking about some hoodoo-voodoo are we?"
"Hoodoo-voodoo?" Thor asked blankly.
"Magic and stuff," Coulson waved a hand. "I know stuff exists but it's all energy fields, isn't it?"
"In a manner of speaking. Magick is the manipulation of forces, of energy, of the physical and the non-physical world. That's what Loki said." A pause. "Magick is also the tether to the Unseen Realms. Mjolnir is part of that. I am part of it as well. We are all within its framework."
"I see…"
"Perhaps you do, perhaps you do not." Thor sighed. "After all, not all are gifted to understand its workings and not all are able to speak for the spirits. But they speak nonetheless, heard or no."
"And you hear… voices?" asked Coulson delicately, looking a little worried.
"More than before… and yet not enough," sighed Thor. "All I know is that there are things in this Realm which hold great power and on Midgard no less. This morning… I woke. I woke suddenly. I woke suddenly with a word on the tip of my tongue. Since then I have attempted to listen… but with little success."
"What did you hear?"
"I only know one thing. Someone is coming. Someone perhaps bearing great evil."
"Great. That's just… great," sighed Coulson, reaching for his pager. "Anything else I should know?"
"Nothing else… except…" Thor paused and his gaze fell on one of the cafeteria's monitors. His mind was clearly wandering elsewhere now. "I woke with one word in my thoughts."
"What was that?" A pause. "Thor. What was it?"
"Who was it," Thor corrected Coulson absently. His blue-eyed gaze hardened and, rubbing his brow with a sigh, he met Coulson's worried look with a similarly matching one. "It was my brother. Loki." A pause. "I think… I think… he is here."
Thor's voice tightened.
"And he's in trouble."
-0-0-0-
Karl was a tall, grey-haired, brown-eyed man with tan skin and a firm yet gentle touch. As he talked, his rough voice was lowered and hushed but calm and in control. Clearly, he was a man who knew what to do in a crisis. After a cursory examination, Karl gave Loki a few potions which he claimed would ease Loki's magickal fever a little, for a while. Fighting fear and watching Mildy nod in agreement, Loki grudgingly took the medicine.
"The de-tox is… well… inevitable." Karl shook a small capsule and held up the clear liquid as it turned a sickly shade of yellow. "He was on that Fire-Mind shit, for starters."
"Fiero," Loki groaned.
"Yes. That's what some call it. But note the color. There's something else with it – korm, I should imagine. If you're lucky, that's all they gave you."
"So what can we expect?" asked Mildy apprehensively.
"Well, in words you'll understand," Karl put away his doctor's bag and pulled forward a dark leather satchel. "He's coming off a long period of drug use. Drugs like LSD – and other kinds of uppers and downers. Uppers to make him talk, downers to keep him sedate afterwards. Not the best kind of crap to be taking on a regular basis, but at least it's not crack."
"Things are going to get worse before they get better, basically," Mildy said.
"Yes, unfortunately, yes."
"This sucks," sighed Jace.
"Well, don't do drugs," Karl shook his head, looking grim. "That's what we tell kids these days, right?"
"But he'll be OK in the long run, right?"
"He'll… live," Karl said. "If he keeps fighting his impulses to take drugs and if he keeps his nutrition levels up… Our friend here has as good a chance as any. Even better if his magick comes back and he allows himself to project."
"I think his magick comes and goes erratically. He said at one point that it was gone for a longer period of time but it's back now.
"Hm. So he's probably experiencing nerve damage. How many signs of haywire magick have you guys seen?"
"Flares and the like – mostly invisible to the human eye…" Mildy said. "Nothing too serious…yet."
"I dunno, some of it's totally creepy," Jace shuddered. "At night, when I'm trying to sleep, he whispers to people."
"I do not," Loki grumbled from his makeshift bed. "Liar."
"Well," Karl gave both young men a look. "Our friend, uh, Loki, will do just fine, talking or not. Who have you been talking to, Loki?"
"No one," Loki turned away, rubbing the side of his temple. His now purple-red temple. Or maybe that was a lie too. "My-my mother. Sometimes. I-I-I miss her."
"Does she speak back?"
"Some-s-sometimes."
"Hm." Karl glanced at Mildy. "He might be talking to Her."
"That's fine, right?" Mildy asked apprehensively. "He's not going to be crazy forever."
"Well, it's hard to say. Those who speak with Her on a regular basis aren't always known for their… rationality." Karl mused. "Still, we don't know for sure – and besides, that's what drugs do in the end. They open the mind to worlds we can only imagine. Who knows where he has been. Anyways, you two have been taking good care of him. I'm giving you three potions – one for mild relief of pain, one for nutritional balance and the other for his magick, stabilizing it and enabling him to keep his form. I have a feeling that his control over illusions will only be as stable as his control over his powers. Very little, I imagine. Other than that, we have a few things to prepare."
With that, conversation turned to other topics and Loki allowed himself to relax a little, letting the conversation continue on with little to no interruption from him. Strength, apparently, was illusory and his mind could only take so much information before rebelling. Karl, at any rate, seemed trustworthy and the small breeze which circulated the lot whispered only comforting things.
I am in good hands, Loki reassured himself for the tenth time. Fear is the drugs. Or the lack of drugs. It is a matter of the mind. Reality is not what you see it to be…
Envelopes appeared and reappeared as Karl discussed with the three travelers what to do upon arrival at the border. There were pictures taken – Loki was propped up by Mildy while Jace held up a white backdrop behind his head and shoulders – and printed off elsewhere (which Jace ended up retrieving). While waiting for Jace to return and the final signatures to be properly added, information about the roads, the border guards and traffic was touched upon, which relieved Loki no end.
Obviously this venture was not entirely doomed to failure. The word 'safe house' passed into the conversation and out just as quickly. For Mildy and Jace, apparently. Loki was bound for a tower. A tower called Stark Tower. A great building in the center of the metropolis, owned by an incredibly wealthy and intelligent ex-weapons manufacturer who currently moonlighted as a savior for the humans. A friend of his brother, apparently. Or at least an acquaintance.
When Jace arrived, Karl finished up the paperwork while simultaneously giving warnings and advice about Mr. Tony Stark and his enterprises and SHIELD, the shadowy organization with whom he had been known to consort.
"We've a few folk in there, keeping an eye on things," the older man said, "but they won't be able to help Loki if things go awry."
"Things won't go awry," Mildy said quickly, watching Loki as he twitched at the words, hands beginning to shake just a little. Again.
"Things won't go awry," Karl said, "because Fury is in charge – but he is a soldier and takes his orders from the Faceless Council, whom I do not trust. With those jackasses around, things could go to hell in a hand basket in a few secs."
"I thought that stuff was just nutty conspiracy talk," Jace blinked.
"They don't control the world," Karl said quietly, "but they might as well. Watch your step. New York is their throne room, so you will be walking in their territory."
"OK," Mildy nodded. "We'll do it quietly and quickly. Drop him off and skedaddle. I'll memorize the address to the safe house and get Jace and I stowed away quickly before Loki talks."
"Loki will tell the truth or he may not," Karl glanced at the glittering green-eyed, dark-haired alien who stared back at him suspiciously. "I hope he will leave you two out of it. Even if he doesn't, they won't find you again. We'll have new identities ready for you. Regardless of Loki's actions."
"Here we go again," sighed Jace. "Fine. This better be worth it though."
"Jace!" Mildy jabbed her younger brother in the ribs and giving him a glare. "Of course…" Here, she glanced at Karl. "It's worth it."
Karl glanced over at Loki then, his gaze unreadable before slowly nodding.
"Loki is worth it. He has to be."
"What-"
Before Loki could get out his question, Karl continued onward, unstoppable.
"Now, you said Loki mentioned a brother called Thor. We have record of that. Landed in New Mexico with a hammer which is unmovable. It's still there – a new site for the SHIELD organization and the headquarters for their operations."
"Like Roswell, all over again."
"Roswell and the truth about the universe has long since been buried… This is something else," Karl sighed. "Now, the truth is out. Aliens exist, et cetera, et cetera. And of course with the heralding of the unknown, there is the usual reaction of fear. Fear drives all in a heedless, headlong race to war."
"Wow. Depressing much," Mildy made a face.
"At any rate, Thor of Asgard, as he is known, has allied himself with SHIELD and works for the protection of Earth and humanity. I do not know if he is aware of what SHIELD stands for, but he works for them nonetheless."
"It is here, isn't it…" Loki whispered.
"What is?"
"The Tesseract. It is on Midgard… it is here and the Voice of the Void is coming for it…" Loki closed his eyes. "I saw… I s-s-saw…"
"The Voice of the Void – the Mad Titan has arisen?" Karl leaned forward. "You are certain."
"On a dead planet, or a m-m-moon, or a graveyard of stone… it is called Sanctuary and he sits there, in the darkness and draws all who would heed him…" Loki's ramble hitched, voice rising as panic set in. His green eyes darkened at the memory as a mirthless smile crossed his face momentarily. "He-He is coming."
"Coming," Karl echoed. "And you wish to warn Thor."
"He is coming. F-f-for it. Through it."
"The Tesseract."
Loki nodded wordlessly. Karl rubbed his eyes.
"Earth isn't ready for this. Telling Thor… I understand." He turned to Mildy and Jace. "You two need to get him to New York. Now."
"We're ready," Mildy said, voice a little unsteady.
"I'm glad you came to me," Karl said, "but there is no time to lose. I must go to the Elders and tell them the news. You must go onward."
"Well," Jace climbed in, shifting the new bags and packages of food Mildy and Karl had brought as well as the envelopes holding Loki's forged paperwork and Mildy and his identification. "I'm ready. Let's get this show on the road."
"Ride well and hard," Karl nodded. "May the stars shine on you and show you a clear path." He turned to Loki and nodded his head. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Loki."
"Th-tha-"
"Just relax," Karl said patting Loki's blanketed foot. "You're in good hands."
With that, Mildy closed the van's doors and got in the front seat.
"You guys ready?"
"As ready as we're ever gonna be," Jace said. "Loki?"
Loki smiled painfully as his gut twisted again and his world spun around him slowly, painted in the colors of the rainbow. He could already see it – a vista of grey and metal and glass, a metropolis on the edge of the ocean. Overhead, the skies were grey and blue and filled with clouds and smoke and beyond the stars shone down unseen, day and night. In the center, there was a tall tower, curved and grand as any other, a monument to a man's genius.
And shooting upward to the sky in a blaze of pure white energy, a light shot upward. A door opened to a dark world, an empty moon and a swarming army. Thrumming with energy, the Tesseract sang.
Twisting away, Loki closed his eyes to the vision and told himself again as the world spiraled and whirled. He knew that as the claws of sickness sank in deeper into his already weak flesh he would find it even more difficult to achieve what he sought, but there was no choice. Loki smiled crookedly.
I am no hero, he mused, never saw myself as one… I was always the smart one, the self-preserving one, the manipulative trickster who carved his own path, found his own way to achieve his desires and protect the ones he learned to love. This is different… in some ways, but no less necessary.
There will be time.
"I – I," he managed to get out be slipping back to the worlds beyond the stars, "I am ready."
[…listen to the silences…]
[…heed the still, small voice…]
[…it is calling…]
There would be time. He had to make it so.
Well, there you go. The crappiest, craptastic chapter of all time. This story is a first draft so there are parts that are weaker than others. This is one part which will get a major edit, I think. I dunno. Sigh. I just don't know what to think. But sometimes you just need to write and let it be.
SIGH.
Let me have at it. Tell me what you think. If you see plot holes or have questions, feel free to ask.Thanks people who review! I srsly appreciate you guys!
-KI
Information on Levels of Mage/Magical Abilities
Level 1 – Eno'sa
Level 2 – Eno'tho – Thanos
Level 3 – Eno'frei
Level 4 – Eno'ah – Elven Mages/Odin
Level 5 – Eno'ko – Asgard/Jotun/Any Other Healthy Realm Mage/Prince Loki before Odin caps him
Level 6 – Eno'yul – Sharda'aa/Regular Mage
Level 7 – Eno'vee – Uncollared Kol'la/Current Prince Loki post-Fall (past Sleen & Jela)
Level 8 – Eno'mah – Collared Kol'la/Current Prince Loki post-Fall (up until Sleen)
Level 9 – Eno'lei
Level 10 – Eno'sanai
Alien Glossary:
'auzha – fucker
bollen - boulders/monoliths
chi'iano – a radioactive piece of rock similar to uranium
cho'ai - lover
Dou'ma – idiot
Eno'Keshi'ko – the system of Eno, a type of magical level measurements
Fen'chi Galaxy – Andromeda Galaxy
gan'ga'war – steel balls
gan'ko – ganka'jya chon, a steel beetle
iz'kyr – a kind of frozen stone powder which is used as a narcotic for some species
Janah – similar to dammit
Ka'autha'ndarna - Reality
kalo – a kind of purple-red fruit, similar to a pomegranate or dragonfruit
Kholathan – Safety Belt/Protected Zone
kol-sava'atha – a titanium-rich ore
kolm (sniffer) - a kind of drug like weed
kon'bi – short for konji'bifu, space bat
ku'sha – "fuck"
lasu – space rat
l'gon – storyteller
lifeljos – life light/signature
Morning-star - a mace
myech'myena - shape-shifting
Mye'hyoi Peyt – Milky Way
n'ch'nka – a kind of cow
Nord-Stjarna – north star
Nyr'Fjor - Jotunn's original name for V'slozh'noi
oma'auzha – mother-effer
oto'oa - big sister
pu'lotni – plutonium
pye'nee - a kind of bird
Ra'ska'yeh o Phyllo'xia – Tales of Phylloxia
roobyn – a red stone
r'senk'ne – a kind of deer/cow hybrid
Shen'grid – the Protected Zone, the zone in which habitable planets orbit around a sun
Shi'nuwu – Reality/Yggdrasil
sigan – short for yan'sigan, rock-worm
So'shah – Earth/Midgard
syem'fyerma – family/community farm
Tai'shu – The Void
tro'watal – perseverance
udji'oo – a drug, like opium
whota – wheat