A/n: Hey.ü
Another, but shorter, chappie here!ü
I'm trying to work fast but, unfortunately, I haven't recovered fully yet from the stress school brought me. I'm trying to sleep as much as possible since we're deprived of it for at least 10 months of studying. (At most 3 hours of sleep everyday. Sometimes we don't actually sleep for two straight days and then sleep for an hour the next night. I actually didn't grow even an inch because of this deprivation!ü LOL!)
Cruel, huh?
Anyways, I wanna say to those who reviewed again…
Thank YOU!ü
I really miss all of this and all of you!ü
I hope you enjoy this next chappie.ü
Oh, and of course, please review.ü
Your comments are my treasures.ü
By: Aningme
Chapter 27
Dilemma: The Sequel
He could feel his feet shake in that sudden adrenaline rush when he ran to the infirmary. His lungs burned, not noticing how fast he went through the old corridors and the familiar portraits that hung on those walls. He didn't pay attention to the glancing eyes of the portraits, some smiling in delight of his presence, some widened in fear and disbelief. He heard a sheer shout of happiness, accompanied by a shriek of terror.
But as those sounds and whispers faded behind him, he stopped dead at the double doors of the infirmary, his hands quickly fumbling through the door knob. He couldn't open them, he couldn't bolt it open.
"Madame Pomfrey!" He called, banging the door with loud knocks.
But as he waited for a sound similar to a reply behind those big doors, he noticed the crawling silence smothering him and the corridors behind him. All he could hear was his ragged breathing and the creaks of the door he was hitting with his fist.
"Madame Pomfrey!" He tried again, his voice almost breaking in unadorned panic. "Open the door!"
Locks suddenly fumbled behind the doors. He stared impatiently as he watched the knob turn and sounds of metal clicking and switching filled his ears.
The moment he heard the triumphant sound of the lock finally opening, he reached for the door and merely ran over a young woman…
He swore in a hiss and turned to the young woman. "I'm sorry. Are you alright?"
The young woman frowned and stood up, smoothing her robes and her skirts. "Watch where you're going Malfoy." She spat, bewildering Draco with her tone. "Be reminded that you don't own this corridor." She looked up to him and studied his face, her frown deepening into an ugly scowl.
His eyes widened after a moment of staring at her pale face, her golden brown hair, her stunningly familiar hazel eyes… "Her… Hermione?" He choked, surprised to hear his voice in a soft one, more high pitched like a young boy's…
She threw him another glare. "What's wrong with you? You look like you've seen a ghost." She studied him further and raised a brow. "I'll pretend I didn't hear you just now on the gibberish idea of you calling me by my first name." She turned her back and walked off.
"Wait!" He wanted to run to her, but he found his feet plastered to the ground. "Where are you going?"
She gave him another suspicious look and shrugged. "It's none of your business, Malfoy." She spat his name like bile.
His head wanted to spin and whirl into a faint. "But… Hermione…"
She turned to him again and walked a few steps to him. "Is this some kind of game again, Malfoy?" He only managed to stare at her. "Don't you ever call me by my first name. You have no right." She turned to her heel and walked away.
"No. Don't go." He muttered before he even thought of saying it.
She only stopped on her tracks without looking back at him. "Don't worry, I won't tell Harry or Ron about this." She uttered and left him…
He suddenly bolted on his seat, his head suddenly jerking from his arms propped on the bed beside him. He glanced around him and blinked, adjusting his sight through the darkness or the room. Finding a few more empty beds around him and some shelves full of vials of potions of different colors, he figured he was still in the infirmary. He didn't know he'd been sleeping---or dreaming--- for some time already.
He sighed tiredly, feeling awkward and worn out from the peculiar dream, and glanced at the woman sleeping on the bed beside his chair. His hand was tangled with one of hers, her breathing was slow and gentle, her chest slowly rising and falling in a constant beat.
"Hermione." He muttered, hearing his own voice as deep (and manly) as it should be. He laid his head back on the bed and frowned, pulling their joined hands to his lips, caressing it with kisses.
As if awakened by the sweet gesture, Hermione fluttered her lids and slowly turned to him, her smile weak and looking wan. "Draco."
Hearing her voice pronouncing his name, he closed his eyes in relief and placed her cold hand on his cheek "I'm sorry. Did I wake you?"
"No." She widened her smile as he raised his head and kissed her belly----their child. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah. Of course." He smiled for her, still holding her hand, "Are you okay?"
"Yes." She muttered, just staring at him. She heard him moaning in his sleep just before he woke up. She was about to wake him herself when he suddenly bolted awake, his eyes glistened in vulnerability.
It worried her.
"You better go back to sleep. It's still night time." He urged, tucking her securely in the sheets. "We'll have a lot of sight seeing to do tomorrow. You should rest."
"No." She shook her head, pushing the sheets away and attempted to sit up. "I've been sleeping the whole day."
He quickly stood up and assisted her, holding her shoulders gently and settled her pillows on her back. "Are you comfortable?"
She scowled at him, grabbing his hands and placed their joined hands on her lap. "Stop taking care of me."
He only laughed at her statement. "Hermione—"
"I mean it." She insisted, deepening her frown at him and glancing at the wooden chair he'd been sleeping on. "You should sleep on a functional bed. There are dozens of them, if you didn't notice."
He turned and studied the infirmary again, only noticing now that there was a candle lit on a table just beside Hermione's bed. They were alone in the room, only accompanied by the shadows and the sounds of rustling leaves and blowing night breezes outside, He studied each and every bed kept in rows, seeing in his mind the silhouettes of people passing through the narrow isle in the middle. He'd been in this infirmary for numerous injuries waiting to be cured, and had slept here for countless nights due to his carelessness, stupidity, and sometimes, his arrogance.
And yet, he couldn't reckon a moment of having someone beside his bed to take care of him or even watch over him when he slept.
It didn't matter to him then, it didn't matter to him now.
But, hell, he wouldn't allow that to happen to Hermione.
Not ever.
He turned to her now and smiled again. "I happen to be a man who can sleep anywhere."
"That's not an excuse!" She pointed out, her voice abruptly breaking, surprising both herself and Draco. He could see the unshed tears threatening to fall down her cheeks now, leaving her angry hazel eyes drowning in them. She furiously rubbed at them, wanting to dry them.
But then, she ended up sobbing, her tears drenching her face and her hands covering them now.
Thoroughly alarmed, Draco cautiously moved closer and wrapped her in his arms, letting her face rest at the crook of his neck.
"I'm… I'm sorry." Draco whispered, shaken by her sudden outburst.
"No. I'm sorry." She shook her head and tried to pull away.
But then, he held her tighter, not letting her go. "It's okay." He muttered, wiping her face dry with his thumb. "You don't have to be always strong, Hermione."
She shuddered with that, fresh tears suddenly stinging her eyes again. Giving in, she wrapped her arms around his neck and wept.
Not saying a word, he just held her and carefully laid themselves on the bed, letting her rest her head on his chest.
No one dared to speak, letting the silence dawn over them and their caresses be their comfort. She sighed as he ran his hand up and down her back, soothing her.
"I'm sorry, Draco." She murmured, her sobs a quiet sniffle now. "I just… I just can't take this anymore."
He looked down at her, staring at her ravaged face. "What?"
Sitting up beside him, she sighed heavily and ran a hand through her hair. "I want everything to be normal again, whatever normal was before."
He watched her back, longing to touch her golden brown curls. "I'm working on that, Hermione. Don't worry."
"That's the point." She snapped, turning to him. "You always do the job."
He sat up too, baffled by all means. "What are you saying? I ought to do everything to bring you back. I brought you to this situation. I didn't think clearly enough to keep my eye on her at all times. This is my responsibility—"
"That's bull, Draco, and you know that."
He stared at her, taken aback.
She looked away and played with her hands. "You shouldn't need to keep an eye on her. You shouldn't have to protect me from her." She paused, as if afraid to say her next statement. "She was your mother."
He laughed at that, his laugh sounding weary than joyful. "I was born from her. But she's never my mother. I was never her son." His mirth façade faded now, taken over by the quiet sadness that was evident in his voice. "I was nobody's son. Only an heir for their malicious intentions, or even better, a servant to them."
She looked at him this time, seeing the Draco Malfoy hidden in his elegant, composed fascia "But you freed yourself from them."
"I did… I did." He repeated, more for himself than for Hermione. "They took away everything from me, my freedom, my dignity, my happiness…" He gazed at her, his eyes seeming to melt her. "They can't take you away from me too."
Deeply moved, she turned away and quickly wiped the new tears coming.
"C'mon, I didn't mean to make you cry again." He whispered, holding her chin, facing her to him. "Don't cry."
Sighing heavily, she smiled. "I'm sorry… I just couldn't imagine this to happen to me."
He tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear, saying nothing.
"I don't want to be this way anymore… It hurts…" She paused, trying to stop a sob from coming. "It hurts to wake up one morning, not knowing where I am, or who I am. Sometimes, I wake up knowing I'm here… with you… Sometimes I wake up not even knowing if this really happened---" She glanced at their wedding ring. "---or not. It's like being trapped in a time warp… a tug of war between two worlds… the world I had here in Hogwarts… and the world where I have you."
He opened his mouth to speak, but she shook her head, silencing him.
"I don't want to see you doing this to yourself because of me, because of your belief that this is all of your fault, that this is your responsibility."
She held his cold hands, warming them with hers.
"I want to be free from this curse…" She whispered. "And I know you can do that… I only wish to be by your side as we go through this… as you fight your demons along the way…" He shook his head at this. "No. Don't." She held his face with both of her hands, caressed it. "I know about them. Well… maybe not all of them but… That's not the point. The point is I'm going to be here with you. I'll face them with you."
"I know that."
"But you wouldn't let me, would you?"
"I didn't mean it that way."
"No." She sighed heavily. Then laughed, surprising him. "It looks like I need to beg to you before you let me."
He laughed at her remark. "You're always by my side, Hermione." He answered, touching his brow with hers. "You and me, always."
She smiled at that. "Then don't beat yourself up… Don't hurt yourself…" She sniffled, closing her eyes. "Don't push me away…"
"I'll never push you away …" He muttered, watching her, and cautiously leaning to her.
She stiffened at first, startled with the sudden feelings erupting from her chest. But then, as she stared into his silver eyes, slowly drowning her in, she felt her body stop from pulling back from him, letting him slowly and painfully claim her lips.
Feeling her slow surrender, her mouth becoming soft against his, he draped his arms around her, deepening their kiss. He smiled at her, their mouths an inch apart, his eyes closed, and their brows still touching each other. "Never."
The sun lazily rose, leaving the dark murky skies streaked in orange and red. Birds seemed to wake, singing songs pleasant to the ears, harmonizing with the soft blows of the breeze.
And yet, everyone seemed to be asleep, letting the hushed quiet of the halls and corridors of Hogwarts govern every ear that would dare to listen. Everyone, except one, lying still in one of the sea of empty beds in the infirmary. He couldn't bring himself to sleep, only listening to the soft breathing beside him, her head comfortably resting on his shoulder. His arm wrapped her frail body, letting her curl into him.
And her voice, so sweet and angelic in his ears, played in his mind the whole night.
I don't want to be this way anymore… It hurts…
He heard the way her voice shook, the way her sobs trembled her, the sounds of her cries, her silent weeping of pain.
It's like being trapped in a time warp… a tug of war between two worlds… the world I had here in Hogwarts… and the world where I have you.
He knew it would end up this way, a need to face two choices, and the desperation of the need of choosing between them.
Don't push me away…
He closed his eyes, trying to relax himself. Through out the years of his life, the only ones he didn't regret were the ones he spent with Hermione. It was the truth, and he hoped that she knew that…
He hoped that's what she felt for him as well…
He knew she had to choose between him and Potter three years ago… when she climbed each night at her hospital building, deciding to end her life or not.
And now, she had to do it again, now that she knows nothing about his sins… and the reasons why Potter is now eternally gone.
He looked down in his arms, watching Hermione sleep peacefully, her hand gently resting on his chest. He smiled at that and took it with his other hand, holding it carefully.
He had everything he wanted in his life and couldn't ask anything more.
But he knew there was one thing that was hard to ask, one that was hard to wish for.
He wished to be forgiven of his sins…..
To be accepted….
And to be loved despite of who he was…
Draco Malfoy.
A/n : I know it's shorter than the other chappie's, but heck, there's always another chapter to follow.ü
Yes, I WILL update.ü
It's been fun, and I hope you enjoyed this.ü
Please tell me what's wrong about it and ask stuffs that you didn't understand.ü
Thank you so much guys!!ü
Until next time then.ü
TC!ü