A/N: A slightly more upbeat chapter this time. Let's get some comedy and jokes going while we still can. :)

Chapter 73 - Dealing With 'Extinct' Races

hi shepard,

we took care of things on tuchanka, but im sure youll realize that we left loose end. the rachni.

even before coming to tuchanka, i heard of some trouble around the rachni relay and sent a squad there to investigate. never heard from them again. now we know why. now im sending my best forces there, the aralakh company. id appreciate if you would link up with them as soon as possible. coordinates attached.

im sure you will want to help with this problem. we wouldnt want anyone to start suggesting you screwed up on noveria, right, haha?

in other news... making babies again will be fun. i intend to do my part to build our numbers back up. anyway, were off to save the turians now, since they apparently forgot how to hold a gun, heh.

take care shepard, my sister in arms

urdnot wrex

"I can't believe he actually put 'Making babies' as a message title," Liara blinks, having read the message too.

"Well, it's nice to know where his priorities lay..." Morgan chuckles, as the terminal beeps again to indicate a new message. "Wait, there's more... oh, it's from Bakara this time... let's see."

Commander, I'm writing this to you from the Kelphic Valley on Tuchanka. I wish you were here to see this. I'm watching krogan pour in from across our entire planet, so many of them that I've lost count. They've all heard the news. We are finally free. The age of suffering is over. Never again will krogan be afraid to give birth. Never again will they fear the pain and heartache it might bring.

With respect and admiration, your friend,

Urdnot Bakara

P.s. Please ignore Wrex if he mentions anything about 'making babies'.

Shepard breaks out in laughter. "Poor old Wrex, he's not going to have an easy time with Bakara!"

"She is certainly a very eloquent and charismatic speaker," Liara admits with a smile. "And her spelling is so much better too."

"Wrex is right, though, much as I loathe the idea of dealing with the rachni," Shepard sighs. "The boys are still recovering in the medbay, so looks like it'll be just us, the Girl-Squad against huge, angry bugs."

"I feel like I'm suddenly coming down with some sort of mystery illness..." Liara jokingly suggests.

"Allergy to rachni? Yeah, I know that one, it's more common than you would think!" Morgan chuckles back at her lover. "All kidding aside though, I'd better give Joker those coordinates. Let's see... the scouts went missing on planet Utukku, Ninmah Cluster... I guess that's our next stop."

Liara approaches the doors of the cargo hold with quiet worry and trepidation, unsure what to expect. Dr. Chakwas has told her that she has thrown Javik out of the medbay as soon as she could because his attitude was bad for morale. The Prothean has still not been cleared for active duty, so Liara imagines that he might be grouchier than usual, but still, she is determined to try and chip away at that armor of his, feeling desperate to get to some of those big historical revelations that he surely must be hiding.

Javik is standing at one of the water tanks placed in his 'quarters', washing his hands over and over. "You again," he remarks, seeing Liara enter, the asari flinching a little from the reception she gets.

"I am glad to see you are doing better, Javik," she tries politeness first, not expecting much. "I was worried, I did not know if Dr. Chakwas would be able to help without knowing a great deal about Prothean physiology."

"She displayed some rudimentary competence. The assistance she provided was adequate," Javik replies emotionlessly. "I understand she used the salarian's data from studying the dead Collector bodies."

"Ah yes, of course, how clever of her," Liara smiles.

"Your efforts of trying to make friends are pointless, asari," Javik gives her a hard stare. "That is not my purpose here."

"Perhaps, but would it truly hurt you to display a little bit of common decency to the others?" Liara asks. "If you even know what that is."

"I do not care," Javik shrugs, returning to the water tank. "I find this need to wash my hands disturbing. But the residue of this ship is so very strong."

"This ship has been home to many colorful individuals," Liara smiles in remembrance of some of their old friends. "I am not surprised that they have left deep traces."

"I detected a human female. Her genetic structure was unnatural, as if artificially created. And a drell... there was illness in him."

"Operative Miranda Lawson and the famous assassin Thane Krios," Liara explains.

"And a krogan who lived in these quarters. He was undergoing a... metamorphosis. He was strong but his memories were confused, spirit in turmoil. The traces he left... they are intoxicating, full with so much power, rage and hatred..."

"I... I will demand that Shepard moves your quarters elsewhere," Liara quickly offers. Goddess, maybe that's why he is acting in such a hostile manner? I have to talk Morgan into moving him elsewhere, I must!

"You will do no such thing, asari," Javik gives her an angry glare. "I revel in his strength and passion, they fuel me. This is what I need to serve my role as an exemplar of vengeance for my people!"

Okay, I give up, Liara sighs inwardly. Well... one more try being nice, after that no more demeaning myself. "I still find myself fascinated by that talent of yours. It is regrettable that evolution took the species of this cycle down a different path."

"Yes, and you also have far too few eyes to be effective," Javik agrees. "But at least you seem to understand why I consider you and the rest of the species of your cycle to be primitive. Evolution, the greatest power of them all, has decreed so itself. Our scientists believed it was the only force in the galaxy that mattered. They called it the 'cosmic imperative'. The strong flourished. The weak perished. I don't understand why the governments of your time seem so concerned with ensuring the survival of all."

"So was this imperative just your scientists' opinion, or did they prove something we don't know?" Liara asks, hoping to keep the conversation going.

"The universe had already proven it. They only had to look around," Javik shrugs his shoulders. "Extinction is the rule of law in the cosmos, the natural order of things. The weakest species are doomed."

"That was... the proof your scientists based their conclusions on?" Liara asks, feeling herself starting to shake in anger, her scientist nature feeling affronted at this pathetic explanation. "Well, let me tell you something. You see what you wish, because you are bullies, looking for justification to exterminate the weaker races as you please! Anyone else but you will look at the order of the universe and see something completely different!"

"Their opinion does not matter, because they are weak and unimportant. Just like you, asari," Javik replies coolly, managing to incense Liara further. "The strong grow stronger by dominating the weak. It is for the greater good of all."

"Greater good? That is... the most disgusting and pathetic reasoning I have ever heard!" Liara fumes. "Even the species of this cycle who thrive on conflict do not pride themselves in dominating the weak, they seek to test themselves against more powerful opposition, believing to thus becoming stronger! To prey on the weak is simple cowardice, and... and of all the species of this cycle, you... you remind me of batarians!"

"Ah... finally you show some fire, some promise, asari!" Javik exclaims, looking pleased, much to Liara's dismay. "I was wondering how long you would just stand there and allow me to mock your obviously different beliefs. I see now that there might be some hope for you. Perhaps this war will eventually shape your people into something not completely useless."

I... I don't think I can go through something like this just to earn a sliver of respect from him, Liara groans inwardly, feeling exhausted. "Speaking of this war..." she decides to change the topic of conversation. "I hope you are pleased with our progress."

Javik looks ponderous before replying. "I have heard about the offer the salarians made," he says eventually. "I would have accepted it and not told the krogan. Morality and friendship do not matter now. Your allies are simply resources to use against the Reapers."

"And after the Reapers are defeated?" Liara asks, feeling the anger begging to bubble within her again. "When all your former allies suddenly remember the way you treated them during the war with the Reapers and decide to take revenge on you? Maybe it is better to treat your allies well?"

"Typical reasoning of those who are weak," Javik shakes his head. "If the krogan seek retribution for the past, do not waste time on sterility plagues. Destroy them where they stand! In the meantime... they are useful cannon fodder against the Reapers."

I... I think I'm starting to... hate him, Liara realizes, at the same time feeling a little blasphemous for daring to think that way of a member of an ancient and supposedly noble race. "I have only one more question, Javik, before I leave you alone," she says sweetly, walking up a little closer to the Prothean. "I have always wondered... are your reproductive organs external or internal?"

"External, why-... ungh!" Javik grunts in pain, holding his crotch in his hands as Liara proudly marches out of the cargo hold, then quickly hobbling towards the elevator once she is out of the Prothean's view.

Once inside the elevator, she collapses, starting to gently massage her aching foot. "Oh, goddess, it hurts so much... f-f-ffffun fact of the day, Liara... feels like Prothean testicles are made from solid metal," she breathes out, selecting the crew deck as her destination, with the intent of getting to the medbay as soon as possible.

"So... let me get this straight, just on the off-chance that I'm missing something here," Shepard gives Liara an incredulous stare, as together with EDI they sit in the Kodiak piloted by Steve Cortez, heading straight for their drop point on the surface of Utukku. "I already have three of my squadmates declared unfit for action. And then you go and kick one of them, albeit the really annoying one, in the nuts and crack a bone in your foot..."

"It is just heavily bruised," Liara replies defensively. "You are overreacting, Shepard."

"Mind you, I understand the temptation," Shepard nods. "What tipped the scales today?"

"Oh... a combination of things," Liara shrugs. "I think I just decided I don't like him very much."

"So you kicked him in the groin, alright, that's a reasonable reaction," Shepard grins. "Seems to me someone's getting in touch with their inner krogan." Liara's wilting stare just makes her chuckle all the more harder, when Morgan turns towards EDI. "I must say, Adams really did a nice number on your body, EDI. Can't see any scratches or anything."

"Chief Engineer Adams is a competent and valued member of the crew, and his work in restoring this platform to its previous state is highly appreciated," EDI replies. "However, Jeff's hysterical reaction to my possible non-functionality is less welcomed. I am at a loss of what to answer to his tiresome tirades."

"Never give him the actual probability values of our safe return from any given mission, I'm sure they are very depressing to look at," Liara suggests. "Always raise them to at least 70%, that should make him feel more reassured."

"Good idea, Liara," Morgan grins. "Though maybe he was so frustrated this time because he desperately wanted to be in Adams' place, with his hands glued to your posterior."

"Commander, have you ever considered a career at stand-up comedy?" EDI asks, sounding completely serious. "You seem to possess a natural talent for it."

"I have been thinking about launching a career once I retire from active military duty," Morgan replies, trying to keep a straight face. "Liara and I will become legends in Thessia's clubs and bars, if only I can convince her to play the role of the straight woman... asari in my act."

"Shouldn't we be discussing our mission goals instead?" Liara appears to have finally had enough.

"Well, if you must be boring..." Morgan sighs, dropping all the nonsense and resuming to talk all business-like. "Our backup will be the Aralakh Company. The best way to describe them would be... krogan commandos."

"I have an impressive amount of data on them, Aralakh Company is an accomplished unit," EDI remarks. "Their latest operation of notoriety was liberating a colony from batarian pirates."

"There still has been no contact with the scouts coming here to investigate the rachni presence in the first place. Since we actually discovered the rachni on Tuchanka... we can guess what happened to these scouts," Morgan says.

"I just can't believe the queen would willingly agree to something like this," Liara speaks, looking upset and worried. "She promised she would disappear, and perhaps I am naive, but I believed her."

"I still believe her," Shepard shrugs. "I met an asari contact of her on Ilium during one of my visits, and she assured me that the queen and her children were doing well, keeping to themselves and staying clear from the rest of the galaxy. They seemed content with their existence."

"Heavy mutations and modifications suggest forced Reaper interference," EDI speaks up. "It is likely that the queen and her subjects are being actively controlled by the Reapers."

"Yeah, that's what I'm thinking too," Shepard nodded. "I'm afraid that the rachni have become unwilling tools of the Reapers through no fault of their own. When I spoke with that asari on Ilium, she made it clear that the rachni considered Reapers their enemies, and would never willingly work for them."

"Approaching the rendezvous point," Cortez informs them from the pilot's seat. "Got the visual on the krogan camp, and I can see our backup down there."

"Alright, settle us down," Shepard says as Cortez lands the shuttle on the small pad, and the three of them jump out, only to be faced with a strange and unexpected ceremony. Roughly twenty large krogan are standing in an orderly row, like frozen statues, while the leader of their unit approaches them... and he certainly seems familiar.

Before Shepard can say anything, however, her old friend Urdnot Grunt stops and raises his hand. "Aralakh Company!" he roars. "Salute Shepard, the savior of our people!"

The collective roar of twenty krogan momentarily deafens Morgan and almost knocks her to the ground. "FOR SHEPARD!" they shout, all as one. "HERO OF THE KROGAN!"

"Aww, you shouldn't have," Shepard can't stop herself from grinning like a fool, stepping forward to shake hands with Grunt, or rather get her hands mangled by the krogan's fierce handshake.

"Hahah! Shepard!" Grunt bellows happily in her face. "The Aralakh Company has been waiting on your arrival! We heard what you did on Tuchanka. There can be no greater honor bestowed on a krogan than the opportunity to fight alongside you, hero of our people!"

"Thank you, Grunt, I don't think I've ever got a reception like this before," Shepard smiles, looking at the gathered krogan. "So, you're in charge of the Company, I take it?"

"Yeah. They're tough and think they're invincible," Grunt replies, looking at his troops proudly. "Reckless, but effective. Had to bust more than a few heads to prove that I am the strongest and the most worthy to lead this bunch, but now they follow and respect me!"

"So, have you seen any of the rachni yourselves already?" Shepard asks.

"No, we only just landed ourselves," Grunt shakes his head. "But we had time to do some scans of the area. There are tunnels under us and they all lead to a large central point. If we're lucky it's a nest!"

"A nest would be... fortunate," Liara agrees. "We could end this decisively here."

Shepard sighs, taking in the news. "You people have the strangest definitions of what is considered lucky or fortunate," she chuckles.

"The ruined scout camp is a little ways ahead. We should start our search from there," Grunt tells her before turning to his krogan troops. "Aralakh Company! MOVE OUT!"