No Such Thing As Free Lunch

Chapter 8:

Never one to delay implementing a plan, Sesshoumaru caught up with Kikyou before school, at the beginning of the next week. Standing beside her locker, he cleared his throat. But his classmate simply greeted him and walked down the hall. Feeling unsure of himself, Sesshoumaru meekly followed her to the classroom. He did not know where to begin.

There was almost a quarter of an hour until their first period began, so the homeroom was still empty. They had plenty of privacy. Now, if only he could figure out what to say.

Somehow, this had all seemed easier on the inside of his head. "I noticed," Sesshoumaru began slowly, "That you seemed to be having . . . some trouble with your . . . boyfriend?"

The long-haired girl slowly stopped placing books from her bag onto the desk. Puzzled, she tilted her head to the side. "Hmm?"

"The man I saw at the shrine, this weekend," he continued.

The other class-representative stared at him blankly.

Still, Sesshoumaru could not be dissuaded. A direct route was best, sometimes. No one else was in the area; she would feel free to reply. "I wanted to offer to be a listening ear."

Finally, Kikyou understood what he was talking about. But instead of giving him a response that he had been hoping for, or even a reply that he had been dreading, the girl managed to stun him completely. She began to laugh. And this time, the laughter was much more free and easy-going than it had sounded on the weekend.

Sesshoumaru lingered a few feet away, uncertain whether laughter was a good sign or a bad sign. Even worse, he was getting distracted. When Kikyou laughed it made her sound very nice, and the upward turn of her lips made her cheeks look pretty . . . He glanced away, unexpectedly shy.

Overcoming her surprise, Kikyou replied gently. "Oh! That man," she said with a smile. Then, she chewed on her lip, as if doubtful of her next few words. "No, no. I don't have a boyfriend."

Inside his chest, Sesshoumaru felt his heart take wing, flying away into the air. He stood at attention, facing Kikyou. She was single! He had been incorrect about the red-eyed, black-haired man. They were not involved! Well, that would make his task much easier . . .

Unfortunately though, Kikyou had not finished yet.

"I have a girlfriend," she corrected him.

Sesshoumaru felt his heart abruptly plummet into the fiery depths of hell.

Without noticing his internal struggle, the girl resumed unpacking her bookbag. Slowly, she gathered her papers into a stack. Next, she raised the lid of the desk, tucking them inside it.

As she moved, Sesshoumaru stared at her hands, transfixed. It was hard to think. To process her words.

"The person you saw this weekend at the shrine," Kikyou answered his unspoken question, "His name is Naraku. That is her older brother. He's very protective of her. To the point of trying to control her life. He acts . . . like she is one of his possessions."

A wistful quality in the dark-haired girl's tone caught Sesshoumaru's attention. It was immediately clear that she liked her . . . girlfriend . . . a great deal. Of course, that did not make it any easier to deal with the idea that Kikyou was taken – and not only that – dating another girl.

He sagged wearily against one of the desks, realizing that he had just offered to be a listening ear, while his high-school crush spoke about her girlfriend. Ah! The agony.

But he had offered to listen. And apparently, Kikyou did not mind telling him about her problems. After all, she already told him the crux of the issue that was bothering her.

In resignation, Sesshoumaru nodded to encourage her to keep going. It was too late to retreat from the conversation now. And he did want to help Kikyou! She had seemed so sad lately.

When she saw that he was paying attention, still listening, she shrugged slightly. "I try to show her that it is okay to break free from the mold," his classmate mused. "To demonstrate that you can be an excellent student, respected in school and society, even if not everyone understands you… But it's hard sometimes. Kagura is used to being controlled."

Once more, the pale-haired boy bobbed his head, agreeing mildly. The name, Kagura, it was not one that he recognized, so he guessed the girl must be a student at another school. Or at least, in another grade.

"She wants to be 'free' but she doesn't seem to know how to achieve this goal," Kikyou sighed.

It felt strange to stand there and be sympathetic. Well, at least, now that he understood the actual subject. Sesshoumaru always attempted to act as though he understood everything that happened around him, even when he did not. But this was the first time that his failure seemed so obvious, so total.

On the one hand, he didn't want to seem like an opinionated bigot. So, although he did not feel entirely comfortable with the idea of girl-on-girl relationships, he would try to be understanding. On the other hand, he desperately wished that he could shake her shoulders and tell her to consider guys too. Surely, other girls were not the only type of person Kikyou ever wanted to date? Or perhaps they could give the boys a chance to . . . watch. . . at the very least?

Luckily, he managed to stomp on this indecent reaction, before he spoke. He vigorously pounded the urge into oblivion. Keeping a cool facade of calmness and commiseration, he listened to her tale of woes, nodding in all the appropriate places.

And after five minutes had passed, other students finally began to trickle into the classroom. Kikyou quickly stopped talking, when she saw other students. Just before class began, though, he was shocked to hear her voice again. With a furtive smile, she called to Sesshoumaru. It seemed as though her mood had improved a great deal.

"Thank you for listening," Kikyou whispered, as the other students filtered past them. "I had always thought you had a sort of steadiness about you. And I was right! You are not the biased or prejudiced type – simply a good friend!"

He returned to his desk, slightly appalled. Not because of what she had told him about her sexuality. No. To be honest, in the end, he was ashamed of himself.

He realized that Kikyou was incorrect. He had always been rather biased on certain subjects – his half-brother, for instance. And he was not particularly 'steady' in nature – he was capable of holding grudges for years. (Again, Inuyasha was the sticking point.)

It had never occurred to Sesshoumaru before today, however, that this made him into a liar. His good behavior at school presented a false picture of his actual, internal attitude. And in the end, this mattered, because he did not want to act like a liar toward other people.

Kikyou had assumed that he would be kind and understanding, not judgmental. But it was not necessarily true. Sesshoumaru could be very judgmental – he simply didn't speak of it to others.

Did that make him into a dishonest person?

Finally, as class started, he shook his head firmly. Perhaps this discovery was not as negative or unpleasant as he thought. At the very least, Kikyou felt safe, revealing such a personal secret to him. Certainly, he was reliable enough to keep secrets. It was positive that he didn't divulge other people's affairs.

Even if his behavior was deceptive, it was positive, right?

Chewing on these thoughts, he doggedly held them in his mind, unable to let go of the subject.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Solid, dark boots. Brown suede shoes. Black shoes with a strap over the top. Loafers with a buckle in the front... Glittering sneakers?!

A-ha! After several minutes of searching the shoe-racks at the front of the school, Sesshoumaru found them. Kagome's shoes had not disappeared yet. This meant that she was still in the building somewhere!

Some students wore different footwear to the school than they were allowed to wear with their uniforms. They exchanged their regular shoes with the uniform approved shoes, at the front door. And he had noticed that Kagome Higurashi was one of these girls. She seemed to like wearing more color than a restrictive uniform policy permitted.

Strange as it might seem, he hoping to find her. Rubbing the back of his head, the third-year realized with embarrassment that he had reached a new low, if he was stalking girls by way of their shoes.

And since when did he have such a good memory for the style of shoes that Kagome wore?

There was a very good excuse for this sort of behavior, though. Right now, he needed the same sort of support which he had offered to Kikyou, only that morning. And Sesshoumaru did not know many girls. He could count all of his female acquaintances on one hand. Even more important, he could only think of one girl over whom he had enough leverage to ask for advice, without her turning on him or revealing a potentially embarrassing story.

Kagome was perfect! Because she was not acquainted with Kikyou, she would be unlikely to sabotage the older girl for any reason. Because Kagome was good-hearted, she would probably not trouble him either, by exposing his pointless, fruitless crush on Kikyou.

Furthermore, in a worst case scenario, he could always blackmail her into keeping quiet, by threatening to tell Inuyasha that . . . that . . . she agreed to make lunches for Sesshoumaru first. Well, it wasn't much blackmail material, but it was better than nothing. Still, he knew the truth – the chances of Kagome attempting to undermine his reputation by telling people about his infatuation were slim to none.

Kagome was far more likely to be sympathetic. The same way he had acted that morning, toward Kikyou. It was almost like karma. He had offered a friendly, listening ear to Kikyou – now he deserved one, too.

Knowing that she had not departed for home, he started a methodical search across the campus. At last, he discovered the girl in the back of the art classroom. A flash of movement caught his eye as he walked through the second-floor hallway, and as he turned, Sesshoumaru saw his target in front of the windows.

Furiously pacing back and forth, she did not even pause when he slid open the classroom door. For a moment, she resembled the spunky, vivacious girl with whom he had first argued at the tennis courts. She resembled the angry girl who cowed his little brother into being a boyfriend one Saturday afternoon. Yet this current version of Kagome seemed very troubled. What could be upsetting her this much?

All thoughts of asking her opinion about Kikyou slowly dribbled out of his mind, as he watched her pace the length of the classroom. Over and over again. She seemed to be arguing with herself.

Eventually, she noticed him at the front of the room. Although it took her several tries to express herself clearly, Kagome stopped in the middle of an isle and muttered something. Crossing her arms over her chest, she tapped her foot, nervously waiting for a reply.

He blinked, mystified. The only piece of her phrase that he understood, it had something to do with Inuyasha. "What about Inuyasha?"

"I said," growled the first-year student, loudly this time, "All he ever wants to do is stare at other girls!"

Without waiting for Sesshoumaru to answer, the dark-haired girl returned to her tirade, pacing beside the windows. "It's really annoying. Miroku, Sango, and I visit him all the time, outside of school. Even when he is working. Which sucks by the way! Why did he have to get a part-time job, anyway?"

Pointing her finger at him, she waggled it in the air, as though this would make her point clear. It didn't.

"But anyway - that's not the point!" she continued venting. "The point is: Inuyasha flirts with all his female customers. Especially this trio of girls from our class, named Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi. They are all over him. They giggle and smile, and they play with their hair . . . "

Next, she trailed off, gazing doubtfully at her own locks. Twirling a few strands of hair around one finger, she huffed impatiently. "So what is it about hair?! It's just... strands of protein!"

Sesshoumaru found himself nodding absentmindedly, not sure what else to do. This was definitely not the situation he had anticipated, upon finding his half-brother's girlfriend. The girl that he helped introduce to his brother, in fact.

However, she took his agreement as a good sign. "Yes, that's exactly what I mean!" announced Kagome. "It isn't just those three girls, either. He's always ready to act brave or to seem hilarious around other girls. But all we ever do is argue."

Tipping his head to one side in consternation, the upperclassman pondered her story. Oddly enough, listening to Kikyou complain . . . Well, that had been confusing. But listening to Kagome complain was amusing and . . . kind of fun. Not because he enjoyed her disappointment, no. It was simply that he could easily imagine his half-brother doing something so stupid in front of the girlfriend.

"I guess I am learning the truth about him, now, huh?! Is that it?" Pacing back to her supplies, she started to shove them roughly into her pack. Then, abruptly, she stopped and threw the bag across the room. Sesshoumaru flinched.

With one hand out, he inched forward to calm her down, wary of upsetting her more. Unfortunately, his sole audience member did not seem to be ready to stop ranting yet.

"I wish I'd learned what he was like sooner," whined Kagome, tucking her hands beneath her arms once more. "At least our 'dates' did not get very far."

Wide-eyed, she swirled to face him, continuing her monologue. "Oh! Can you imagine if we had . . ." she whispered, as if the subject itself was scandalous. "No! That would have been awful. I'm glad to break up with him sooner, rather than later."

Taking a deep breath for good measure, the upperclassman echoed her, helplessly. "You are breaking up with Inuyasha?"

"Of course!" shouted Kagome. "He's a . . . a . . . two-timer!"

A crease developed in Sesshoumaru's brow. Hmm. Unbelievable, but true. He was about to take his brother's side in an argument. Again.

"Really?" he inquired mildly. "Have you seen him kiss another girl, or some such thing?"

Grouchy, sullen, she stared at him. "No," the younger girl grumbled.

"Has he told anyone at the school that he has feelings for another student, other than you?"

Kagome stomped her foot and crossed the room, stopping directly in front of him to poke him in the chest. It seemed that she had a habit of doing such things. He also remembered the way she had a tendency of working herself into a frenzy, instead of simmering down into a state of calm.

"No, but that's not the point," she persisted, still prodding his chest with her forefinger, although there was no force behind it. "The point is that we aren't happy together."

As if she had only just realized what her hands were doing, without her permission, she stopped touching him. She looked slightly surprised, but Sesshoumaru wasn't certain whether it was because of her own actions, or because she had a revelation about Inuyasha. Kagome was difficult to interpret.

"I only want to be happy," she said morosely, staring at the tips of her shoes. The expression on her face darkened, disintegrating into a moody, sad look. " But I want him to be happy, too. Since Inuyasha seems unhappy around me, then . . . I should break up with him, right?"

Once again, he was completely unaware of what to say. The third-year student felt like he was standing on a line, not sure where to step, left or right. Should he defend his half-brother (who hadn't done anything wrong) or encourage her to break up with Inuyasha (as they had planned all along)?

As long as she kept doing so well, telling him about her problems, then perhaps he didn't have to participate in this conversation. . . much. Gently guiding his companion to a seat, Sesshoumaru gathered together her schoolwork. "Mm, perhaps," he replied noncommittally.

Naturally, this encouraged her to continue.

Flipping from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other, she swiveled in the seat to look at him. With a smile, she clasped her hands together over her chest. "Ah, but you're the older brother," added Kagome brightly, "So, you know what he likes to do! You can give me advice."

He froze in place. The silence following this statement nearly echoed off the walls. Her emphasis on the word 'advice' practically seemed to give the word a capital letter.

Vehemently, Sesshoumaru shook his head in denial. Honestly, he did not want to be dragged back into the middle of his half-brother's relationship. He did not want to assist Inuyasha. He didn't want to see his half-brother happy with this girl. Although he couldn't quite put his finger on why not. Perhaps it was vengeful and nasty behavior toward his half-brother, but it had to do with Kagome's feelings, as well. She should find someone better . . . No, he was not going to help her reconcile with Inuyasha. Pushing the two of them toward each other, and then watching them break up, it had been his intention all along.

Moreover, this was not why he sought her out, in the first place. Giving her advice on her love-troubles was not a part of his plan. Sesshoumaru needed advice, not Kagome! This was all going wrong.

"Oh, come on," she pleaded. The girl's voice took on a wheedling tone, which he recognized instantly. It was the same imploring sound that Rin always used to coerce him into things.

But this time, he would not relent. He shook his head again. "I can't help you with this," he asserted firmly.

"What about telling me his favorite color or something?" she wondered aloud, basically ignoring his words, "I could buy him . . . "

"No," Sesshoumaru snapped icily. "Absolutely not!"

Her mouth fell open, in surprise, as if she could not believe his refusal.

And even that small gesture made Sesshoumaru feel guilty. He was being rude and unsympathetic, and he knew it. But really, he did not want to help with this problem.

Desperately, he tried to salvage the situation, but only managed to dig himself deeper into a hole. "I try very hard not to know too much about my half-brother's life, actually."

She countered with a threat. "I'll quit making you lunches, unless you tell me one tiny, little thing about what your brother likes."

Of course, the threat did not sound nearly as credible to Sesshoumaru, as it did to Kagome. Given the fact that he had only gotten her to agree to prepare a month's worth of lunch-boxes. . .

And that month was already over . . .

Scratching his head, he eyed her suspiciously. Either she could not count, or she had forgotten that she had already ceased to give him lunch in the morning. He huffed. There wasn't much else he could say. "You only owed me o-bento boxes for one month."

"Yes, I know. I am so very nice. When Inuyasha saw me making two lunches, he asked who the other one was for . . . so I told him I didn't want you to feel left out." A nervous giggle escaped her lips. "And then, I had to keep making lunches for you, even though the Month-of-Torture was over. But that's okay, I don't mind making your . . . I mean . . . I was preparing one box for Inuyasha anyway. It doesn't take extra effort to prepare another portion of the same stuff."

As she trailed off, gazing at his blank face, Kagome frowned. "Inuyasha has been giving them to you, right?"

It was the thought that counted, even if he had never received the extra food. Sesshoumaru shrugged, a smile overtaking his normally indifferent facade. "No."

A flutter of warmth enveloped him, when he understood. This girl had continued to honor their deal, even after it was done. That was very nice. Although he had only received a month's worth of lunch-boxes for Rin, it seemed that Kagome had continued making them, on his behalf, without his knowledge.

"What? He's been eating TWO lunches, every day, for the last week?!" she shrieked in outrage. "Oh! That pig! I am breaking up with him, for sure!"

This time, the elder brother did not think to protest on behalf of his sibling. Instead, he offered to carry Kagome's bag as they left. She protested weakly, then allowed him to do it. It allowed her arms more freedom to gesture, as she continued to discuss Inuyasha's many flaws. A subject which didn't bother Sesshoumaru nearly as much as it would have, if he had been a normal sibling.

As he walked Kagome out of the building, he realized that he did not need to discuss his problems, after all. This girl was marvelously entertaining. How could he worry about someone like Kikyou, with someone like Kagome there to distract him?

Also strange, how dialogue between Kikyou and Sesshouaru always seemed a bit stilted. They periodically dropped into silence. In contrast, conversations with Kagome flowed easily and smoothly, despite the fact that he did not say much. He didn't need to, because she would respond to his expression alone.

"No, seriously!" she vented, as she slammed her locker door. "He's a terrible brother. He talks about you, like you are a selfish, manipulative jerk. You didn't selfishly steal two lunches per day, for a week! And why shouldn't I want to make you lunch too? I made all the food anyway. Why not divide it in two?"

"Indeed," he agreed smugly. The smile would not seem to fade from Sesshoumaru's face.

Over a month ago, he had found a handwritten note from Kagome in his locker, criticizing the terrible things he did to his half-brother, Inuyasha. She had a bad opinion of him, back then, but it seemed she knew the truth now. These two brothers just did not see eye-to-eye. And he was always right. And Inuyasha was always wrong.

Next, in a most serious voice, he made a new offer. In his opinion, it seemed quite generous. "You may continue to prepare o-bento boxes for me and skip making one for Inuyasha, if you like."

"Oh, no, no!" she protested merrily. "You aren't getting free food that easily. This whole agreement was a big mistake, and I don't WANT to date your half-brother anymore."

"But I might die from hunger ?" he volunteered wistfully.

"Hmph!" Kagome grinned widely, clearly disbelieving his pitiful suggestion.

Opening the front door of the building for her, he wandered outside onto the concrete pathway that ran around the school. "What about the seven meals that Inuyasha ate on my behalf?"

"Ah! Seven!" she objected. "Who said he stole that many?"

At this rate, he was going to be late to his cram school session. But somehow, Sesshoumaru could not drag himself away from the schoolyard yet. "Six?"

"No, we are not playing the numbers game, not again," Kagome said. It seemed that a goofy smile had infected her, as well. "You won, last time."

"...Five?"