Chapter 89

My training came and went that afternoon, but I wasn't sure exactly what I'd taught them today. The stupid grin on my face was unwavering as I equated gross profits with the growing feeling you get when love swells up inside your heart. Most of them didn't seem to get the analogy, but I sure did.

I played Liz Phair on my MP3 player on the way home.

"Get a load of me, get a load of you.
Walkin' down the street, and I hardly know you.
It's just like we were meant to be.
Holding hands with you when we're out at night.
Got a girlfriend, you say it isn't right.
And I've got someone waiting too…

Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you?
Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you?
It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
So tell me,
Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you?"

God, just thinking of Nick had me where I couldn't breathe and couldn't think straight. He'd called three times since we saw each other at lunch. We were meeting at the trailer in an hour. I'd stop home, freshen up, and then head on over.

My phone rang as I turned on Northwest 23rd Avenue.

"Hello," I said in a sing-song voice.

"Hey, Sexy," replied Monroe. "You sound like you're in a good mood."

"Oh," my breath caught in my throat. "Yeah, I had a good day. How are you?"

"I'm good. Glad to see you're answering your phone again."

I awkwardly chuckled. "Yeah, sorry about last night. I listened to your voicemails this morning."

"Yeah, umm… I kinda got a little worried so, you know those voicemails had to sound a bit, umm, nuts."

"No, it's fine. I won't worry you again." I'll just make out with your best friend instead.

"So, when are you coming over tonight?"

I paused. "Well, remember me telling you about that Grimm database I started on?"

"Yeah, I remember."

"Nick wanted to know if I could come over and work on that with him tonight. Would you mind if I took a raincheck?"

"Grimm work. I could help with the German. Come by and we'll go over to the trailer together."

Crap!

"Oh, no. It's going to be the English parts and super boring. Just a bunch of transcription. Honestly, I don't know why he doesn't just let me take the books home. I could get more done that way."

"Well, he really can't let the books get out in the real world, if you know what I mean."

"You're right. So I should just go to the trailer and do the work instead. Good idea."

"Is that what I said?" Monroe sounded puzzled as he paused. "Okay, maybe I did?" Smooth talking 101; always convince the other person it was their idea.

"Thanks. I promise I'll be over tomorrow. Okay?"

"I suppose I could get a head start on a mantel clock that a client dropped off earlier today."

"Mantel clock. Yes, you should do that."

"Don't stay up too late, okay? I want you well rested for tomorrow."

My heart clenched. "Of course. I'll see you tomorrow."

As I hung up the phone, I let out my breath. I'd just pulled a Jack Monahan.

(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)

Once I was home, I cleared out my negative thoughts. This was fine, it would work out fine. Ice cream sounded good right now, but I still hadn't bought any. I checked the freezer anyway like I expected it to magically be in there. No, that was one ability I apparently didn't have. I pulled out the Ziploc bag of tarts and nuked one of those instead. Why not cheat on my diet, too?

I munched on my tart as I located my dad's book, Coins of Ancient Greece. Nick wanted to look it over. We were going to work on the database tonight, so it wasn't a complete lie. The laptop and scanner were still in the car. I shouldn't have taken my stuff back from Nick, since I was bringing it over again.

I popped the rest of my tart into my mouth and licked my fingers. Damn, that Adalind was too good at baking. I fought with myself to not have a second tart and instead got ready to go to the trailer. I did a once over in the mirror. My hair and makeup were perfect.

As I drove to the seedy parking lot, my hands shook a little. Thoughts of Nick and me alone had my nerves racing, yet I was smiling. I really liked him. No, it was more than that. My heart raced. Was it more? My brain coaxed me to say it… Go on say it. I pulled out my MP3 player and let Van Halen say it for me.

"Whoa, here it comes
That funny feelin' again.
Windin' me up inside
Every time we touch.

It's got what it takes,
So tell me why can't this be love?
Straight from the heart.
Oh, tell me why
Can't this be love?"

Was that what this was? Oh, God. My Leo Love Bug bit at me to the point of giddiness. Yes, that was it. I was in love. But this was a new record, even for me. Both my heart and brain were in agreement. But Monroe. No, I loved Monroe. Even if my brain was afraid… afraid I'd love too much, let go too much, my heart reminded me I loved him too.

Van Halen finished singing as I pulled up beside Nick's Toyota next to the trailer. I couldn't say anything. No, Nick would think I was mad… crazy even. The butterflies spiraled down to my toes as I got out of my car and knocked on the trailer door.

The door opened and there he was, dark bangs and blue-green eyes as bright as the sun.

Nick rested his hand on the door. "Hi."

"Hey." I bit the edge of my lip as I walked inside.

As the door swung closed behind me, Nick took me in his arms and kissed me hard on the lips. Sure it was wrong, but when he kissed me like that, it was like an explosion went off inside my heart.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you after lunch," he murmured as he continued to kiss me.

"I know. I couldn't stop thinking about you either."

Nick finally let go. "Did you bring your laptop… back?"

'"Yeah." I nodded. "And my scanner, too. We should get some work done." We couldn't just stay in here and make out all night.

The first hour we remained focused, the next hour we were kissing more than reading and typing.

Oh," I said while drawing away from Nick's mouth. "I brought that book of Grecian coins. You never told me what happened with those."

"Well, it was a case, so I really couldn't…" He grinned at me. "I guess it wouldn't hurt."

So Nick went over the whole story of the jewelry store robbery and his talks with a Steinadler named Farley Kolt, who was engaged to his Aunt Marie. A Wesen and a Grimm engaged? Perhaps my situation with Monroe wasn't all that unique. No, I was with Nick right now, I couldn't think about Monroe. Not only had the Steinadler given Nick information about the coins, but he also had told him that one of the jewelry store robbers was involved in his parents' death.

"And you got upset because I was still keeping secrets?" I let out a breath. "Why didn't you tell me about this when we were going over the information about my parents?"

Nick shook his head. "I don't know who to trust, who to believe anymore. I don't even know if Farley Kolt was telling me the truth. Until I can get some definitive evidence on who was involved in killing my parents, I'm not ready to believe anything."

"Could these same people be involved in what happened to my parents, too?"

"I just don't know. Your parents were killed eleven years before mine. It could be the same people." He shrugged. "Renée, I don't have the answers."

I did the math quickly. "So, your parents were killed in 1994?"

Nick slowly nodded. "I was twelve when they died. Marie took me in and raised me just like I was her own."

The math continued. "So you're thirty-one?" I didn't know how old he was. Wow.

"Thirty-one in June."

"And you lived with your Aunt, but you didn't know anything about the Grimms?"

"I had no clue about any of this." His shoulders slumped. "I didn't know about a lot of things."

I leaned against him as we sat on the trailer bed. "We'll get answers, Nick. Real answers. I know we will… for both of us." I reached for the book from my laptop bag, and then turned the page to the coins. "It's not a lot of info," I said while pointing to the section, "since it's supposedly a myth."

Nick read through it, nodding here and there. "Most of it is from what Farley Kolt told me, but it's good to have it written out. I really didn't get an opportunity to do that, given the situation." He turned to me. "And you said your dad had this book?"

I nodded. "He's… was an avid coin collector." I caught myself. Was, as in, 'no more.' I shook the thoughts out. "His book collection was almost as large as his coin collection."

"Where are all his books now?"

"Still back home in his office. I took a few with me, but if my mom had her way she'd give them all to me." I shook my head. "I wouldn't even begin to figure out how to get them all here without another U-Haul." I sighed. The thought of my dad's office stripped bare tore at my chest. Just taking the books I had seemed wrong as it was, but to clean out his office? No, I wasn't going to think about that right now.

"Hey, I didn't mean to bring it up to upset you," said Nick.

I wiped away a few tears. Nick pulled me in closer, slowly kissing my face, then back to my lips. We leaned back on the trailer bed in our silent embrace and my dizziness returned, blurring out the sad memories.

He paused his lip-lock to gaze into my eyes. "I want to show you something."

"Okay." I removed my suit jacket and took a moment to breathe. God, it was hot in here.

Nick crossed the trailer to the wooden armoire and pulled out a small, metal box.

"Remember how I told you Farley tried to leave with the coins?"

I nodded.

"Well, I didn't finish that part of the story." He opened the lid of the box. Three gold coins were displayed in the blue, velvet liner. He picked one up to show me the swastika and the lion on either side, and then quickly put it back in its box.

"Those are… Oh, Nick. Why do you have them?"

Nick told me the rest of the story with finding Farley the Steinadler in the hotel room.

"No one knows I have them. Well, except for Farley Kolt and Monroe… and now you."

I reached out to touch them, but no… No touching. My hands dropped to my sides. Wow, the things those coins had done to the minds of people… or maybe just Wesen? No, leave them in their little box.

I raised an eyebrow. "What are you going to do with them?"

"Nothing." He closed the lid. "I'm not going to use them, if that's what you mean."

"No, I didn't mean it that way, sorry. Just meant, if that Steinadler knows you have them, won't he come looking for you?"

"It's been over a month and I haven't heard from him since that night." He looked up at me. "How did you know Hitler was Wesen?"

"I don't know. It was just a feeling. Sometimes I get gut feelings about things."

"Like with Lydia Swift?"

"Yeah, like that."

"Did you get a gut feeling about us, too?"

The heat crept up my cheeks. "Maybe."

"Well, I get feelings too." Nick put the coins away and took me by the hand. "When I look at you, I see a woman who is smart and sensuous, with a fire burning within her. A woman who has passion and a lot of heart."

The heat spread further. "You're really good at this."

"Anyone ever tell you that you blush a lot?" Nick asked as he studied my face.

"I blame Portland," I replied, touching my cheeks involuntarily. "The men here do something to me."

"Maybe it's just me… doing something to you." His kisses trailed down my face and we eventually moved back to the trailer bed.

"Yeah, I think you do something to me," I said while trying to keep afloat.

"I love you," Nick breathed into my ear before he kissed it.

I shot up as the 'L' word passed from his lips. Love me? Oh my! He felt it, too? That soon, that easily? Could it really be?

His eyes looked down as he smoothed back his bangs. "I'm sorry. That was too much, wasn't it?"

"No…"

His eyes flashed up. "No?"

"I think I'm falling in love with you, too."

The 'L' word fell off my tongue effortlessly. There was no hesitation like with Monroe. It flowed from my lips like it was meant to be said. But why was it so easy? I wanted this. That had to be it.

"Should we talk about it first?" he asked as he took my hands in his. "It's not rational, is it?"

"I don't know. But I feel it." I placed my hand on my chest. "Maybe it's just fate."

"Fate?" He shook his head. "No, it's not that. I'm just trying to understand it."

"Sorry. Gemini, I forgot."

"Monroe mentioned you were into astrology stuff," Nick chuckled. "What does that have to do with this?"

"It's just that you play on logic not your heartstrings."

"Nothing wrong with logic. But with this… I feel it, too, but I normally don't just jump in like this." He looked into my eyes. "But I really feel this."

"So do I. And Gemini is a good sign for me."

He stifled a laugh. "What's so great about Geminis?"

"So many things." I beamed at him. "Geminis are great at objective reasoning. They're spirited, always in search of information, and their curious mind is continuously turned on. You can multi-task like there's no tomorrow. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and Ian Fleming were both Geminis. Together they gave us the world's best fictional detective and spy. Gemini is the sign of brilliant minds, Nick."

"Brilliant. Really?" He openly laughed this time. "So why is it a good sign for you?"

"Leos are creative and inventive, while Geminis need to keep their minds stimulated and need someone who can keep up with that overactive brain of theirs. Leos step up to that challenge. Both are optimists who have explorative natures. Air fuels fire and helps it spread far and wide. Together there's no stopping them." I smiled. "We make a good team."

Nick gave me that charismatic, toothy grin of his. "I told you that already."

"So did the stars," I replied with a grin of my own.

"I think I can start on the part of fueling your fire."

Nick moved forward and lightly trickled kisses down my neck, undoing the first two of my buttons then lingering his lips on my collarbone. Nick wasn't aggressive. It wasn't… What was the word I was looking for? Animalistic… that was it. With Nick it was just human.

He took his time, and instead of taking off my blouse, he moved back to my mouth. Hands roamed my body, and I wanted to rip his clothes off, but I held back. This was new, so we could take our time with it. I hadn't made out this much since Junior year. His ocean scent wafted through the trailer, salt water with a hint of lemon. Whatever it was, it smelled wonderful.

Nick's phone rang as I was loosening up a few more buttons on Nick's burgundy shirt.

Nick stopped and sighed. "I have… to get this."

I leaned back as Nick pulled his phone from his pocket.

"Burkhardt… Where?" He looked over at me. "Give me twenty, okay Hank?"

He gave me a disheartened stare as he put away his phone.

"Work?"

"Yeah. I've got a B and E on the Southwest side," said Nick while getting up.

"No, it's okay. I probably should go anyway." I sat up straight, buttoning back up. We'd gotten down to three on mine. "Unless I can go with you. Maybe the force can issue me a bulletproof vest with 'Trainer' written on the front."

Nick scratched his head. "I don't think that's such a…"

"I'm kidding," I replied, cutting him off. "I was making a reference from the TV show, Castle."

"Never seen it."

I shook my head. Maybe cops didn't watch cop shows.

Nick bent down and gave me one more kiss. "Tomorrow night…"

I nodded and grinned. "Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow."

"Okay then. That's enthusiastic."

"Sorry, it's from Macbeth."

"Shakespeare?"

"Yeah, that would be Shakespeare."

Monroe would've understood in an instant. Monroe… tomorrow. Oh, Crap! I'd figure it out somehow. I needed to wash my clothes tonight and get Nick's scent off me. Oh, no. What about my car? These clothes would smell like Nick, and I couldn't wash the inside of my car. The cloth seats… Dammit.

I looked up at Nick. "We've gotta get our scents out of our cars."

"Scents? What do you mean?"

"Monroe is gonna smell you on me, and when I leave, the smell will transfer to my cloth seats. God, he can't know. Not yet anyway." I held my head in my hands.

"I think I have something that will help." Nick walked toward the apothecary cabinet and opened one of the drawers. He pulled out a dried herb and brought it over. "This is wolfsbane. If you rub it over the car seats it should mask the scent."

"You have this?" I reached out for the herb. "You can grow it here?"

"Where does it usually grow?"

"It's indigenous to Europe and Northern Asia." I turned it over in my hands. "It's in the books."

"Well, it's also in this trailer. So use it, umm, somehow on the seats."

"I wonder if I can grind it, mix it with something, and spray it."

"Okay, you work on that, but I have to go." He opened the trailer door. "I'm sorry."

I gathered my things and walked to the door.

He kissed me again. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I replied, still trying to believe we were really there.

We both got in our cars. I headed home while Nick headed off to save the world, one crook at a time. On the ride back, my mind was all in a tizzy. I was humming every love song in my mental jukebox on the drive home. I sang along with 'Hooked on a Feeling' with a silly grin as big as a Cheshire cat on my face.

"I can't stop this feeling
Deep inside of me
Boy, you just don't realize
What you do to me

I, I'm hooked on a feeling
I'm high on believing
That you're in love with me…"

Nick loved me, too. But Monroe… Dammit. And now I was seeing them both tomorrow. They couldn't know they were time sharing. I was organized, so I could schedule it out, right?

A/N: Love? Love!? Oh, boy, right?

Renée is getting more backstory, and Nick seems more inclined to let Renée know about things he's kept hidden. Guess love does that to ya, huh?

Sorry, bad Castle joke. Rick Castle wears a bulletproof vest with the word, "Writer" instead of police. (Just in case you've never seen the show, he's a novelist who follows around a detective to help write mystery books.)

Can Renée juggle two men? Guess we'll see...

So are you still with me, dear readers? I hope so!