A/N: Well, here is another chapter. I apologize for the delay. My kitten died recently (rest in peace beloved ╥_╥), so when I was writing this chapter, I was not in the right mind. I just wanted to get my mind off from the depressing thoughts, so that is why I turned to writing. I would re-write it again, but it would take another two weeks, and I did not want you guys to wait that long (plus I was extremely lazy to do so).
So, I apologize in advance if some things do not make sense. Feel free to ask me if that is the case.
I would like to give my gratitude to those who reviewed (ben4kevin, LuanRina, alisjackson59, Kay Queen, WeirdBlackCat, MonkeyGrapes, horrorstar100, perce-neige, and riskakiss) and those who favorited/alerted, and read the story. Thank you all! o(╥﹏╥)o
Warnings: Unbeta-ed, More Angst, Mentions of Marital Abuse
Chapter 9: Torn Apart
(Kaname)
The silence in the room was heavy, suffocating, and with some hesitancy, Kaname placed the fork in his mouth, chewing on the piece of grilled chicken ever so delicately; ever so silently.
The food (boneless grilled chicken with creamy caper sauce) was extremely delicious, no doubt about that, and it matched his palate with harmonious perfection, but even then, the tense atmosphere that hovered over the room like an ominous, dark cloud made it hard for him to swallow, and even more difficult for him to simply enjoy the savory texture of the perfectly cooked meat.
It was that nerve-wracking – and all he wanted was out, from this room, from this mansion, from this damned property – as soon as possible.
Swallowing down a sigh, Kaname cast his concerned gaze to his husband, frowning deeply when the tensed features of the pureblood came to his awareness.
Unfortunately, Haruka's situation wasn't better off either – it coincidentally happened to be worse than his own one. Broad shoulders stiff and tensed, jaw set tightly, fingers reflexively tightened around the spoon the pureblood was in possession of, Haruka's distraught eyes continuously kept shifting between Rido-san and the empty chair situated beside the said pureblood.
The same empty chair that should supposedly be occupied by Zero-san.
An hour prior, he and Haruka had returned to the dining hall – freshly-showered, dressed in elegant, pristine attires, hand-in-hand with goofy grins marking their features as they addressed the older pureblood with respectful words and a bow – in Kaname's case, that had been.
Although, a second later, their faces fell, when the sight of Rido's expressionless face greeted them, a certain silver-haired pureblood nowhere to be spotted.
Rido-san had shot them an uninterested glance, before focusing his attention on his breakfast and speaking, his voice nonchalant; his expression indecipherable, "Zero will not be joining us for breakfast."
No further explanation had been given to them.
Burgundy eyes raised themselves from his half-empty plate, and Kaname fixed his gaze on the ominous, available chair situated right before him, his frown deepening. Something was definitely not right, he could at least suspect that, but what that was, his finger was unable to pinpoint.
Was Zero-san still mad at him over the incident that occurred the previous night? Was the pureblood's pride that damaged when he refused to sleep with him? ... Or was it because of something else? Something more terrifying, something he could not even begin to fathom of?
The dreadful feeling in the depths of his gut concluded that it was probably the latter option. He may be wrong, of course, but even then, Kaname just knew that there was something far more sinister behind the reason of the pureblood's absence than what met the naked eye.
Besides, Zero-san did not seem to be the type of person that held unreasonable grudges against people. But, how could he even say that for sure? How well did he even know the man to claim that with certainty?
Frankly speaking, he had no clue what kind of person the pureblood truly was, nor did he have the desire to get to know him on a personal level – especially not after the detestable things the man had done to him.
Seriously, who would want to be 'buddy-buddy' with the person their spouse cheated on them with? Not him, that was for certain. He had yet to reach that level of open-mindedness, thank you.
An eyebrow twitching, irked, his face slightly contorted with anger; his mood was about to take a turn for the worse as his thoughts progressed without no regards to his feelings, but fortunately for him, Rido-san's voice cut through the tense silence (as well as through his incensed thoughts) and swiftly ensnared their attention with his words.
Swallowing a relieved sigh, Kaname inwardly expressed his gratitude to the pureblood for disrupting his 'musings' at the correct timing. They, after all, were proceeding into a direction of utmost unimportance.
"Haruka, the Vampire Council requires our presences to negotiate further dealings with the humans. We leave next week."
Haruka frowned, not bothering to hide his distaste, "For how long?"
"Three weeks."
Worried mahogany eyes met with his own ones, and Kaname smiled in response, giving the pureblood a reassuring nod; understanding the reason behind his apprehension.
Sighing deeply, Haruka shifted his gaze towards Rido-san, scowling, before he inquired again. "What about Kana – "
"He will stay here with Zero. I am sure he will not mind that. Am I right, Kaname?" Rido-san was watching him now; mismatched orbs smoldering, an indecipherable expression plastered on his face that looked half-uninterested and half-bemused.
The way the pureblood had said that (more like ordered) unsettled him immensely, but Kaname managed to shoot him a curt nod, feeling overwhelmed by the sudden decision.
Zero-san and him...staying together... under the same roof, for three entire weeks? It was a recipe for a disaster, he joke you not.
Did his husband have no qualms whatsoever about the decision? Or was the pureblood too scared to stand up against his brother?
From the corner of his eyes, he shot Haruka a troubled (secretly curious) glance, and the pureblood regarded him with apprehensive eyes, lips compressed tightly into a thin line.
What was he thinking...? Kaname wondered to himself, chewing on his bottom lip contemplatively, casting his eyes down to his lap.
He may very well never know the answer. Hah.
Without no more words to be exchanged, they fell into another deafening silence – one that made him extremely uneasy and restless on his seat. Concerns for Zero-san's well-being erupted within him as time; silence prolonged, and as Zero-san never showed up like Rido-san had claimed that he would not.
His hands curled into fists, and he moistened his dry lips anxiously, eyes darting towards his elder cousin, contemplating whether or not to voice out his worries into words.
But before Kaname could even utter a single word of his worries, Haruka beat him to it, inquiring what he was not able to, voice concerned and gentle as the pureblood expressed his concerns to Rido-san.
"Has anything happened to Zero? Is he alright?"
Warmth passed through his gaze, and the skin around his eyes softened as Kaname stared at his husband, silently and contemplatively.
For the first time, to his sheer shock, he felt no jealousy hearing Zero-san's name out of Haruka's lips. Had the world, metaphorically speaking, come to an end, perhaps?
The spoon clattered, rather loudly, on the plate upon the question (startling him slightly), and Rido-san regarded Haruka, mismatched orbs hardening instantly.
"None of your business, Haruka."
If it was anyone else, they would have literally shit their pants and ran for their dear lives, but unfortunately for the older pureblood, Haruka was not anyone else. He was a Kuran, through and through, and infamously known for his stubbornness concerning matters that were important to him.
And the topic of Zero-san's well-being (and him as a whole general) coincidentally happened to be his first priority – every damn time; even more significant than him.
Inwardly cursing himself, Kaname refused to let that fact leave a sour taste in his mouth. He was better than that – or so he had thought, grudgingly.
The sound of slamming caught his attention, and he directed his gaze towards the fuming pureblood, his lips compressed bitterly. Haruka seemed extremely angry for a reason he had yet to know. Was his husband aware of something that was still unknown to him?
He was soon to find out.
Through gritted teeth, features contorting with rage, Haruka asked; voice hoarse with frustration, "What have you done to him, Rido?"
No honorifics. No respect. No pleasantries. This senseless argument was becoming gravely serious rather quickly.
The words of his husband unmasked the ambiguity of his doubts, and with wide eyes, Kaname stared at the pureblood, not believing his ears.
If what he had heard was accurate, Rido-san had hurt Zero-san...? But why...? Did they not love one another?
Handsome features contorted with a scowl, Rido-san eyed Haruka, contempt written all over his face. "None. Of. Your. Fucking. Business." The older of the two spat out, flushed with anger, eyes narrowing dangerously.
The chair legs screeched loudly on the floor when Haruka abruptly stood up, roughly fisting his brother's collar in his hands, pulling the man closer to him.
"If I happen to notice even a strand missing from Zero, you are dead meat, Rido. I don't care if you are my brother, I will kill you. This my promise to you."
The note of his voice had risen up, his words powerful and compelling. The threat within the mahogany eyes wasn't a lost one, and Rido-san shot the pureblood a deathly glare, his aura darkening considerably – causing the glass doors to shudder violently under the immense pressure.
"Be my guest, dear brother."
Trembling in rage, Haruka's scowl deepened, and with extreme force and viciousness, he pushed Rido-san away, revolted and appalled, making his way out of the door; not sparing even a single glance back.
Kaname (who had been holding down his own rage and bewilderment when the realization what happened to Zero-san became known to him) had been observing the heated exchange silently; meticulously, ready to intervene at any given moment if the situation spiraled out of control, but his services were not needed. The situation had been dealt with, and thankfully, without bloodshed.
His eyes followed Haruka's retreating back grievously, and he bit his inner cheek, prickles of bitter jealousy worming through his heart, knowing fairly well the direction of his husband's footsteps, and to whom they led to.
A dreadful time to be jealous, Kaname. He silently reprimanded himself, scowling deeply.
Pressing his lips bitterly, he leveled a glare upon the crouching figure, channeling his irritation; anger on the pureblood. His terms with Zero-san had not been one of the best (not his fault for the matter-of-fact), but Kaname had not wished for any (serious) harm to befall on the pureblood – the fact that he constantly tormented the man within the walls of his mind should not be taken into consideration.
He had to take out his anger somehow, after all. He would blow up otherwise – and that would not be a pretty sight, certainly.
Sighing inwardly, Kaname bit down on his lip, his mood darkening. For a reason, even unbestowed to himself, the idea of Zero-san being harmed; damaged beyond words, irked him, caused his blood to boil; and that fact alone got on his nerves further.
Why should he even care for that man? Why should he feel concerned for him? This was none of his fucking business. This should have brought him the greatest of joy, so why did it not? Zero-san deserved what he got, right? So, why in the world, was he so damn angry?
Shaking his head to get rid of his dubious, and extremely unrequired, thoughts, his pale lips pursued tight; his wine-red orbs hardened as they focused themselves on Rido-san – who had yet to get up on his feet, his fist clenched over his chest, and trembling.
But Kaname took no pity on the pureblood. The words that crossed his lips a second after proved his intentions accordingly.
"I expected far better from you, Rido-nii-sama." A sneer followed his words, and his burgundy eyes narrowed further; glinting with annoyance and betrayal. This man could not possibly his cousin; he could not be the same person he had once considered his brother; his own family. He could not be the same individual that gave him a place to belong to, the one who brought him books of adventures and fairy-tales whenever the absence of family became a burden on him.
He simply could not be that person. Kaname refused to believe that. The Rido-san he had come to know, to understand, and to love, was far too different from this man; far too diverse.
He would never hurt a fly, let alone another person – it was simply unimaginable.
Then, what in the world had happened to him? What had caused him to change so drastically?
Answers to them he wanted to know, but at the same time, realized, that he was better off not knowing them. The truth could be scary – most of the times, according to his own humble opinion.
Swallowing another long-withdrawn sigh, he squared his shoulders, and shot the pureblood one final glare, before starting towards the door – intending to follow Haruka; planning to catch up to him before he reached Zero-san. They could check up on Zero-san together. He, after all, was shockingly concerned about the well-being of the pureblood, despite his considerable resentment towards the man.
Why? Someone might ask. Unfortunately for them, he had no idea himself.
But deep down, Kaname had the realization that his concerns were not only for Zero-san – but for Haruka as well.
Even if it was appropriate for Haruka to check up on the silver-haired pureblood out of mere concern by himself, Kaname still felt weary leaving his husband with that man – all alone, with no supervision.
His trust issues were rather laughable and unneeded, but could anyone blame him? He had every right to be apprehensive; worried, especially when Zero-san and Haruka were concerned – with each other.
He would love to smash himself against the nearest wall – his jealousy being far too great to his liking, as well as rather damaging to his self-importance.
Yes, that would be very satisfying, indeed.
As he was about to reach for the doorknob, his footsteps (as well as his fingers) came to a sudden halt when his arm was abruptly grasped – halting him in his quest; wrenching him around to meet with the hard, unreadable eyes of the expressionless pureblood.
What in the world...!
A hot, angry retort hovered the tip of his tongue, but before he could even open his mouth to give the man an earful, he was abruptly cut off – to his greatest chagrin.
"Kaname, stay. I need to have a word with you."
"I don't want to – "
"Please."
With his lips pursed tightly, he stared at the pureblood, blankly and impassively, raising an eyebrow inquiringly, not in the mood to comply with any of his requests, but at the same time, giving him the benefit of a doubt; mildly curious to know what the man had to say for his defense.
After all, it was not every day someone heard the impassive Kuran Rido mumble a 'please'. It definitely nudged his curiosity.
"Take a seat, Kaname," The grip on his arm loosened, and Rido-san ducked his head, dark strands covering his features, lips curled downwards into a frown, "It's about Zero."
(Haruka)
Haruka sighed deeply, staring at the door apprehensively; chewing on his lip pensively. For the past thirty minutes or so, he had been standing on this spot, hand over the doorknob, mind deeply troubled, and contemplating over his current dilemma: whether to step inside the room – or not.
His mind was leaning forward to the latter option – since it happened to be the most practical one, but at the same time, his heart was more adamant in choosing the former one – with great urgency, with more importance.
He had come here alright, without having a second thought, of course; but as he was about to force himself into the room, rather violently and uninvited, the notion of what he might find on the other side of the door overwhelmed him with dread; unease, and therefore, had successfully halted him (and his intentions) from proceeding any further.
Zero was behind those doors, safely secured within the walls of his chambers, he could detect his presence with certainty, but the flicker of his existence (normally fierce and intense) seemed so profoundly weak; vulnerable, that Haruka had to suppress a strong urge to barge inside and embrace his beloved into the warmth of his arms.
Although, with great difficulty, Haruka held it in – splendidly.
Besides, his blunt, sudden action might scare Zero to a greater extent (the last thing he wanted to achieve) solidified his resolve. He would wait until his beloved granted him the permission to step inside from his own volition. He would not impose on Zero – his respect and his love for the pureblood ran that deep within him, after all.
If only Zero had chosen him to relinquish his heart to, the pureblood would have been happy, smiling, and well – instead of being damaged, hurt, and anguished by that vile man.
If only he was the one to be chosen, and not his arrogant, selfish, unworthy brother of his, things would have been better – for all of them.
Without warning, the reason (and the person) behind Zero's weakened state reasserted itself to him, and without admonition, pure anger exploded within him, mahogany eyes glowing a deep, menacing crimson; his expression furious and unforgiving.
His brother was the cause of this. The man was the reason behind the affliction of his Zero. Rido would pay dearly. He would have to compensate with his life if necessary. He would never let his brother off the hook – he swore on the graves of his ancestors.
But before he morphed his intentions into reality, someone more worthy was in need of his attention – and that only happened to be his beloved angel, Zero.
Exhaling heavily, closing his eyes shut, Haruka desperately tried to place a reign upon his volatile feelings. He would deal with Rido later – with sheer certainty. At this current moment, the well-being of his Zero should be (and was) his topmost priority. If he lost himself now, things would definitely turn out for the worse, and he might end up doing something that he may come to regret in the near future.
He preferred to avoid that at all costs, if possible.
After successfully pacifying down his raging nerves and heaving another long-withdrawn sigh, his knuckles rapped against the smooth wood, and to his greatest (yet most pleasant) surprise, the doors opened rather instantly – and without a single protest against him.
A wry smile crept upon his features, and mahogany orbs softened at the implication. In such a crucial moment, Zero trusted him enough to allow him to be at his side – as his companion; as his support, especially when the pureblood was at his most vulnerable; his most unguarded state.
To most people, this simple act of reliance would mean nothing, but to him, it meant everything – and as pathetic he was, Haruka let that particular piece of information warm his heart immensely.
Lovesick over Zero, he was guilty of, but could anyone blame him for it?
He thought not.
Heaving a weighty sigh, determination welling in his eyes, Haruka gently pushed the doors further apart and let himself inside, looking around cautiously; desperately searching for the familiar figure.
A king-sized bed stood proudly in the center – silk, creamy curtains draped across the rectangular frame, accompanied by two wooden nightstands on either side; a Victorian, burgundy double door closet was situated right opposite of the bed, against the wall, which was decorated with multiple, ancient portraits; and the glass doors, which led to the veranda, were draped over with heavy, crimson curtains, blocking the trail for the moonlight – consequently basking the room with complete darkness.
The capaciousness of the room was undebatable, of course, but the oppressive, melancholic vibes that were held (suppressed) within the walls of the chamber only managed to add themselves to his growing uneasiness.
A person of a rational mind and common sense would have clearly wanted to stay away; make a run for it when they were given the chance, but Haruka, someone who was not known for his rationality but his adamant behavior, did what he would have always done given the situation concerning his beloved.
He stood his ground and with a heavy sigh, dragged his feet towards the direction of the feeble presence: the bed. Haruka had every intention to see Zero, to make sure the pureblood was okay, as much as he could be, that was, and refused to go anywhere until he was satisfied with what he had seen.
Although, deep inside, he had a feeling that he would not like what he was inclined to find. After all, there was a reason why the pureblood's presence was so frail – the cause for it, once again, managing to surged up another feeling of rage inside of him, and a sense of helplessness – because he was not able to do anything to prevent this from happening.
My beloved, beloved angel...Why must you suffer? Why I am so useless whenever you need my help?
He had nearly reached the foot of the bed, when a question, barely audible even to his sensitive ears, halted the advance of his footsteps, as well as the train to his distressed musings.
"Why are you here, Haruka?"
The lump of blanket moved, and Haruka found himself staring into the endless pool of lavender.
Traces of abuse was evident on the pale features of the pureblood, more so, when Haruka detected; suspected the use of a hunter weapon; charm on his beloved.
Intense sentiments of exasperation, anguish, and fury overpowered him instantaneously, and he snapped his jaw shut, eyes narrowing; frame trembling with frustration, but with a great strenuous effort, he said nothing of it, knowing fully well that Zero would not like him to point the obvious out.
It would make the pureblood mad, and his anger happened to be the last thing that he wanted from his beloved at this moment.
Inwardly sighing, he placed a lid on his volatile feelings, and with his features softening, mahogany orbs gentle and fond, he chose to answer the pureblood's inquiry with his own one.
"Why?" He asked, mostly to himself, pain briefly flashing across his features, "You ask 'why' when you already know the answer, Zero?"
It was more of a statement than an inquiry, and both of them realized that.
Features expressionless, lips compressed together, Zero averted his eyes from him and chose to remain silent, pulling the edges of the blanket tighter to his frame, hiding from him in the comfort of the soft covering.
Burgundy eyes glazing slightly, a forlorn smile erupted on his lips, and he spoke; voice honest, serious.
"Because I love you, Zero. Why else?"
(Kaname)
Closing the door behind him, almost too carefully, Kaname gave a deep sigh, his mind boggled with outrageous information that he could not even begin comprehending the least of it.
Maybe, it had been a mistake to hear the pureblood out, but what was done, was done, he could not undo it – no matter his strong desire to do so.
Sometimes, he wondered, if it was possible to erase his own memories – because, at this moment, that power would really come in handy, mind you.
Pathetic, he was. Did he mind? No.
Another exhausted sigh escaped his lips, and with his steps heavy yet swift steps, he strode towards the staircase, determined more than ever to seek Haruka out and leave this ominous place once and for all. He was extremely fed up with it. Ever since he stepped a foot in this mansion, misfortune followed him like a plague – and he wanted out – as fast as possible – because he was over and done with every single shit that fate decided to throw upon him in these two days.
Emotionally and physically speaking, he was exhausted and exasperated with everything that this mansion, and its owners, had kindly offered him; and he would show them his appreciation if he was not fucking narked at them.
Calm down, Kaname. Calm down. He attempted to soothe himself, but unfortunately for him, his words only fueled his blossoming irritation. Great. Just great.
Exhaling heavily, his footsteps gained speed, and his eyes narrowed with contemplation, as he attempted to wrap his head around the preposterous conversation he had conducted with his elder cousin earlier – the prime reason for his exasperation.
It had been exhausting, no questions asked there; insane, but also, very, very inconceivable. The man was lying, no doubt. It had to be that, it could not be anything else.
As adamant as he was, Kaname refused to consider other, alternative, more possible options. Why? Because the statement his elder cousin decided to relay to him was that bizarre; that baffling. It simply could not be the truth.
He had difficulty in comprehending why Rido-san would go to such great lengths to feed him lies that did not seem to benefit the older pureblood the slightest. It was certainly not normal coming from the man. There had to be an ulterior motive behind those words, right? Or was he being too paranoid?
It was probably the latter possibility, and Kaname had to swallow a sigh at the notion. Damnit.
Even if the pureblood's words were falsely ambiguous, as well as incomprehensible, they troubled him immensely – to his greatest chagrin. Moreover, the fact that his contemplation over the matter only managed to give him a piercing headache caused his mood to worsen considerably.
Splendid. What he needed now.
Abruptly, the scenery of his surrounding changed, and the words of his cousin rang vehemently in his head, causing his mind to haywire, causing him to tremble with annoyance.
Not again.
Sighing heavily, Kaname fluttered his eyes shut, lips curling into a frown, brows furrowed together, as he futilely attempted to push the entire encounter to the dark spaces of his mind. He did not want to hear them again, but his mind seemed to have other plans in store for him – continuously reminding him of the words that he did not want to ponder upon. Fuck.
"Kaname, Haruka is not the one that Zero longs for."
The pureblood had claimed, mismatched orbs weighty, hands clenched into fists.
"Nor is it me."
Rido-san's voice had gotten to the point of nonexistent – words edged with despair, as the pureblood had stared at him with eyebrows furrowed; undecipherable emotions glimmering within his dissimilar orbs.
"It's you that he desires, Kuran Kaname. Not me. Not Haruka. But you."
Seriously? How could Rido-san even expect him to believe a word of that nonsensical crap? The pureblood had certainly lost his mind, and perhaps himself too in the process.
Utter nonsense was what the pureblood spouted, and he would have to be a complete fool to believe any of it. Why would Zero-san want him; long for him when he gave no indications whatsoever that this was the case? Furthermore, they barely knew each other, for Pete's sake! How could anyone even crave for someone whom they had not know for long?
And most importantly of all, why would the man even sleep with his husband when the one he wanted was him, and not Haruka?
Answers seemed to have abandoned him, and Kaname exhaled deeply, massaging his temples roughly. The more he contemplated over his inexplicable questions, the worse his migraine became.
He had a clear understanding that he may appeal to Zero-san in a sexual way (the pureblood's words and actions clearly served as proofs for his intentions), but the dubious notion that the man might crave him more than as a 'one-night' stand terrified him, but at the same time, he could not help but feel thrilled because of it.
After all, what kind of a person would he be if he did not get flattered for being wanted by the most wanted man?
Not a sane person, that was for sure. But that did not mean that his resentment towards Zero-san lessened whatsoever – or that he would be all too happy to 'bed' the pureblood after this information. It would take him a long time to forgive the pureblood for his deeds (or even consider him in that way – if he was single, that was).
Yeah, right.
He could deny all he wanted, but if he had not been married, or in a committed relationship, he had no doubts that he would have jumped on the same bed as the pureblood – immediately, with no clothes on, ready to make love.
No wonder that vampires (and humans) of all social status were after Hio Zero. The man even made faithful people (like him) question their sex lives with their partners.
Shaking his head, and heaving another despondent sigh, Kaname cleared his venereal thoughts, as his footsteps paused in front of the heavy, oak doors, his lips compressed together bitterly.
Haruka was in there, he knew the pureblood's presence by the back of his hand, of course, but unfortunately for him, his spouse was not alone. His senses were also clogged with another presence, one which felt distinctly more feeble with its counterpart.
He frowned again, knowing all too well the identity of the other pureblood.
Of course, he was with Zero-san. Had he already forgotten what had happened few hours prior?
Wine-red orbs hardening, the frown on his features deepened, and Kaname had to suppress the urge to throw a childish tantrum – with extreme vigor.
He understood the fact (or at least, attempted to) that Haruka had gone to Zero-san to console him; to see if the pureblood was alright and alive, but even then, to his greatest displeasure, the bitter feelings of jealousy and insecurity surged within him yet again. They had become an inseparable shadow that followed him everywhere – probably even to his death, that he could no longer maintain them; keep them buried inside.
And he loathed himself for being so susceptible to those sour feelings; to those vexatious thoughts. He was usually stronger than that, wasn't he?
Heaving a sigh, squaring his shoulders, Kaname stared at the door, eyes hard and solemn. He knew he should leave, he knew he should give Haruka some exclusive time with Zero-san, he knew he should wait for Haruka in his own room and trust him with this matter, but at the same time, deep in his heart, he also realized it opening the doors would lead him to the answers that he was in desperate need to know of.
He was aware of all that; he realized the consequences of his actions, the blame should solely be placed on him, and him alone, when his hands slowly; hesitantly pushed the doors ajar, eyes automatically fixing themselves on the duo on the bed, his heart sinking to the depths of his guts, as the sudden realization of what he had stumbled upon swept him off his feet.
Kaname choked back a sob, clamping his hand over his mouth, wine-red orbs glazing over with humiliating moisture.
Locked in a sinful embrace, lips on each other, one arm on his chest; the other one around his waist ...
Zero-san and Haruka were...kissing?
His chest felt branded, like a barrel, with iron straps of sorrow, and Kaname placed his hand on the wall, attempting to not lose his balance, striving to keep his sanity; his rage in check – as his eyes never wavered from the couple, staring them with indignation; observing them with treason.
Betrayal was what he felt, anguish was what he experienced. But even then, he could not understand one thing. Why would they do this to him? Was he so easy to discard? Did his words mean nothing to him?
Why Haruka...? Why Zero-san...? You promised me...! Why would you do this to me again? How could you...?!
The answers were known to him, but he refused to acknowledge them. Why? Because, even now, there was a lingering hope within him that this was nothing but a hoax; that there was more of an explanation to this. If he accepted the answers to his queries, everything would be lost.
He would be lost – to himself, to the world.
And that was not what he wanted for himself – not in million years. He would not end up to be his biological mother. He could not turn out to be like her. He was better than her – he had to be better.
As a savior to his shattered heart; wretched soul, and without a word of admonition, his vision was suddenly obstructed with unmitigated darkness, and a strong, warm chest was pressed against his back, immobilizing him; impeding him from witnessing that heart-rending sight.
And he was grateful. He was so very grateful for this act of kindness.
"Tsk, I told you that you were not Haruka-sama's only lover, Kaname. Zero-sama means everything to him, while you, Kaname, are absolutely nothing to him."
And because of those cruel, cruel words, the foundation of his love for Haruka had crumbled, and so had his heart.
Yes, he understood that now, indeed.
A/N: Dun, dun... My dear, dear Kaname. You really have a horrible timing. ಥ_ಥ I wonder who that man with cruel words was...His words sound familiar, ne? ب_ب
Special Note:
1) I deliberately did not include Haruka's thoughts on Kaname in his POV for this chapter. His topmost priority was Zero, and that was why he was only thinking of Zero in this chapter. His thoughts on Kaname would be included in the future chapters. Until then, I shall leave you in suspense. ٩(×̯×)۶
2) If you have noticed, Kaname keeps going between resenting Zero then caring for him then resenting him again. He doesn't understand why he is doing that. His memories have been erased yes, but the feelings Kaname had for Zero as a child are still intact. You can erase someone's memories, but you cannot erase their feelings for you.
Anyways, thank you for reading this chapter! I hope you enjoyed it. (:
Reviews/Feedbacks are always welcome~! They give me life, seriously. *cringes very hard* (-'_'-)
Well, this is it. Take care, and I will see you all again very soon! (¤﹏¤)