A/N: Don't own (although I'd love to have my very own Norman Reedus :D) don't sue!
Lyrics are from 'Rain' by Patty Griffin
Rain
Chapter Seven
It's hard to listen to a hard, hard heart
Beatin' close to mine
Poundin' up against the stone and steel
Walls that I won't climb
Sometimes a hurt is so deep, deep, deep
You think that you're gonna drown
Sometimes all I can do is weep, weep, weep
With all this rain fallin' down
Strange, how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
When I'm holding on underneath this shroud
Rain
It's hard to know when to give up the fight
Some things you want will just never be right
It's never rained like it has tonight before
Now, I don't wanna beg you, baby
For something maybe you could never give
I'm not lookin' for the rest of your life
I just want another chance to live
Strange, how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
When I'm holdin' on underneath this shroud
Rain
It took Cassidy a long moment to realise why she was lying in a warm bed rather than a musty tent listening to Lochie's snuffly little sleep-mumbles. It was grey outside, still early. They hadn't been asleep for long. Daryl stirred. She pondered making her escape before he woke up but she just didn't have the energy… and it was still cold. She was lying on her front, hugging the warm pillow beneath her to her chest but there was a chill sweeping over her bare back. She couldn't seem to gather the energy to pull up the sheets though.
"You're starin'."
She grinned.
"Maybe I like what I see."
"Sweet talk? Really."
"Wouldn't it be classed as pillow talk?"
He finally opened his eyes and looked at her. She looked softer and more vulnerable first thing in the morning. Her hair was wild and all over the place, rippling over her bare shoulders and back.
"No nightmares?"
"I guess not." She said evasively. "Must have worn me out."
He smirked at her. After a moment his expression was serious again. Cassidy sighed, burying her cheek deeper into the soft pillow.
"She was attacked."
He blinked at her in confusion but she wasn't looking at him now, she was staring intently at a spot on his neck she'd paid great attention to during the night. There was quite a sizeable bite mark on his bronzed skin beneath the stubble.
"My sister. Attacked. Raped. Brutalized. Beaten to within an inch of her life, actually. The doctors said it was a miracle she survived the beating."
There was no expression in her voice; no sadness or grief or even rage.
"So she killed herself."
"No. She was doing well. She recovered… at least physically. Went back to school, passed all her exams. Applied to college."
"So what happened?"
"The trial. They were acquitted. All five of them. It was like something inside her broke. She was so strong. She made it through the attack and she made it through the trial… but when they were released…" Her voice wavered slightly and she moved closer without realising. "Doctors said she had a mental breakdown. She wouldn't eat, wouldn't sleep… when she was attacked they dislocated her hip and broke her knee in three places so she couldn't even dance. She just sat in her room and stared at the walls. For months. Eventually my parents had to have her committed, she was wasting away right in front of us. She spent three years in that place. Never made any progress though. She only ate when they made her. She never spoke to us again, not a word."
Cassidy swallowed the lump in her throat and buried her face in the pillow rather than look at him. She didn't know why she was telling him all this, she hadn't even told Lochie these things and Lochie was basically her best friend.
"No offence, but you ain't the type a girl who lets somebody get away with somethin' like that."
She didn't reply but she turned away from him and he saw the muscles tighten in her bare back.
"I was ten when it happened. Eleven when they were acquitted. She was dead by the time I was fourteen and I didn't find out the details until years later."
She rolled back towards him and he was immediately distracted by her nakedness. Probably her intention.
"I knew she'd been attacked but my parents never explained the extent of the damage."
"How'd you find out?"
He dragged his eyes up to her face with some difficulty; it was very cold in the room after all.
"I had a friend hack into the police computers and download the file."
She leant against his bare chest, drawing little circles on his stomach with her fingernails. She was suddenly cold all over and it had nothing to do with the temperature of the room.
"I wanted to know what happened."
His hand brushed her arm. She sounded very far away, as if she was someplace else.
"I got my wish. Do you know what it's like, to listen to your own sister… your flesh and blood, describe the kind of things those fuckers did to her? To hear the voice that used to tell you stories while, describing her gang rape in such agonizing detail."
Her own voice was trembling but he kept silent. He wasn't good at the comforting thing but he reached out and brushed his fingers over her forehead. It was burning as if her memories had brought on a fever. When she spoke again her voice was steadier.
"It didn't even sound like her real voice. It was so calm. She didn't sound angry or upset or as if she was in shock. It was almost robotic. It was far scarier than the things she was saying."
"How old were you?"
"Seventeen." She murmured against his chest.
He had to remind himself that she was only twenty-four, even if she acted so much older. They lay silently for a while, watching the light filtering through the window getting brighter and brighter.
"Hey lovebirds!" The door rattled as Lochie banged on it from the other side. "Wakey wakey."
"I'll kill her." Cassidy groaned, tucking her hands over her head. "No, really. With my bare hands."
They could hear Lochie cackling with laughter through the thin wooden door. Cassidy wearily levered herself up from the bed and tugged on her jeans and t-shirt. Her bra and panties were a complete loss so she screwed them up and tucked them into her back pocket.
"You should try getting up, you know." She suggested as she rooted under the pillows for her hair-tie.
"I'm injured." He pointed out, not moving an inch.
"Please." She scoffed. "Anyway." She leaned over him to retrieve the hair-tie he was snapping against his palm.
He caught her against him. She kissed him back, ignoring the sinking feeling in her stomach. He had much too big an effect on her.
"These sheets definitely need changing." She murmured against his lips. "Especially after all the things we just did."
She pushed away from him with a grin. Lochie stumbled into the room when Cassidy pulled open the door. She'd clearly been leaning against it, listening.
"You are such a cock-block." Cassidy hissed in an undertone as Lochie grabbed her for balance.
"Well?"
Lochie's grin was so wide, Cassidy was almost concerned that her head might split in two.
"Well?" She shot back evasively as they emerged into the already warm sunlight.
"Come on!" Lochie whined. "I don't need a diagram, just a general summary." She grinned. "Maybe a few dimensions."
"Shut up."
"Well he's so wonderfully built, I just wondered if he was all in proportion."
"Shut up."
Cassidy walked straight to their tent and gathered up her dirty clothes for washing. Not really because she wanted to, mainly just to avoid Lochie's eye.
"So come on, spill." Lochie crouched down in the grass besides her as she sorted out whose clothes were whose. "Did you use all your nasty, dirty little tricks to find out all there is to know about him?"
"We had sex, Lochie. We did not spend the night discussing who we are." Cassidy snapped, feeling guilt flare in her gut. She'd never told Lochie anything about her past or her family or her sister but she'd told Daryl half of it, someone she'd barely known for a few days.
Lochie was about to reply when she stopped and sniffed. They'd pitched their tent a little way away from the other tents and the RV but they could still hear what was going on there usually. Right now they could smell breakfast.
"Morning."
Cassidy blinked in surprise when Carl came into view bearing a tray of fruit and some of the meat they'd smelt.
"You actually have legs, kid." Cassidy teased as Lochie pounced on the tray.
"I'm learning to shoot." Carl said shyly. "Are you coming?"
"I don't need to learn." Cassidy pointed out.
Lochie elbowed Cassidy sharply in the ribs. Cassidy scowled at her irritably but she was gesturing at Carl. He looked crestfallen.
"Maybe next time." She ruffled his hair until his cheeks turned pink. "Shoot something for me, will ya?"
He opened his mouth to reply but Lori's voice rang out shrilly. He gave her a small smile and darted back towards the camp.
"That's your big plan for the day, laundry?" Lochie said doubtfully as Cassidy piled her washing into a borrowed bucket and set off towards the well for water.
"Well given the vast array of opportunities available to me…"
Lochie stuck her tongue out at her departing back, following her through the dry grass.
"Really, though… what was it like?"
"It was sex." Cassidy said flatly, quite glad that Lochie couldn't see her face. "Nasty, hot, sweaty sex. What do you want me to say?"
Truthfully, whilst Daryl's injury had prevented it from being the most interesting sex she'd ever had, it had been the hottest and the most intense. And it had affected her the most. Which was why she was suddenly so squeamish about dissecting the whole night with Lochie.
"Something's going on." Lochie said out of the blue, catching up to Cassidy and glancing at the fields around them.
Cassidy didn't reply, but she knew exactly what she meant. Something was boiling up and their lovely little camp was about to explode. Another reason to keep her distance.
"Laundry, huh?"
Cassidy was busy untangling a studded belt from Lochie's netted shirt. Daryl threw a long shadow over her and she frowned.
"You're blocking my light, sasquatch." She snapped.
He grunted. She finally separated the two items and swung the net shirt over the line.
"Finally finished moping around in bed then?"
His face darkened angrily and she grinned. Her face fell when she saw the new bandages. He followed her gaze and shrugged his uninjured shoulder.
"Apparently vigorous activity is not advised." He was parroting Hershel's words at her but the wicked glint in his eye was entirely his own and she felt heat pooling beneath her stomach.
"You should be resting."
She hung up the last of Lochie's clothes and wiped a damp hand across her sweaty forehead.
"You're not going to be any use to anyone if you keel over."
He ignored her, quite engrossed in eyeing a pair of lacy black underwear dangling from the line.
"I'm going to have none left, the way you go at them." She grumbled, tipping out the used water.
He reached out, hooked a finger into the back of her jeans and tugged her back towards him.
"Is that an offer?"
She didn't reply, not trusting her voice to remain steady. His big hand was caressing the bare skin between her vest and jeans, sending fireworks flashing through her navel. She could feel him pressing against the back of her thigh, the hard planes of his chest warm against her back. The field they were in was pretty much isolated, hidden behind a small grove of trees. The camp was almost deserted, everyone was either hunting for the girl or learning to shoot. Lochie had wandered off somewhere as she was prone to do. They were as alone as they were ever likely to get.
"I thought you weren't supposed get vigorous." She murmured, finding it rather difficult to form coherent thoughts when he was nuzzling her neck.
"I never listened to a doctor before."
His breath was warm against her bare skin and her breathing hitched. Bad idea, very bad idea. Once may have been explained away as a tension-reliever but doing it again was something else. Although the things his warm dirty hands were doing to her... and his lips were so very enticing when they were that close to her ear… and it really was very hard to think of a reason not to when he was pressed so tightly against her, hard against her thigh. Why was she resisting again?
He seemed to have her clothes off with surprising rapidity. One minute she'd been squirming happily against him and the next she was amongst the prickly long grass. She tugged his sleeveless shirt off impatiently, almost ripping it in her hurry. When he chuckled she felt his chest rumbling against her. The grass was scratchy and warm against her bare back as he slipped her vest over her head.
"This is a very stupid idea." She murmured into his hair as he pressed his lips under her jaw.
He grunted against her throat.
"We're total walker bait if we get attacked."
He mumbled something against her collarbone, something that sounded a lot like "it's worth it". Last night had been hurried and frenzied, breaking the tension that had been building. A release. This was infinitely more exciting as Daryl's tongue lapped languorously against her bellybutton, his nimble fingers working the zipper on her jeans. His shoulder was still aching from the night before and it protested fiercely at its treatment now but he had absolutely no intentions of stopping. Clothes were discarded in record time and they lay there for a while, the sun hot and dry on their naked skin, exploring every inch of each other.
Cassidy had determined to be as quiet as possible, lessening the risk they were running of attracting any walkers, but when he finally slid inside her a helpless groan slipped from her lips before she could contain it. As heated and intense as the night before had been, this was far more intimate, not just because the bright sunlight illuminated every inch of them.
"I've never had sex outside before." Cassidy observed afterwards, quite enjoying the warm sticky breeze cooling the sweat on her skin.
She reached over and snared the cigarette from his lips.
"I guess that's what they do around here. It's much too cold in England for this sort of behaviour."
She rolled onto her front, cushioning her head on his bare abdomen. Her long tangled hair brushed against him and he twitched against her ribcage.
"Of course now I've got grass in every orifice known to man."
He laughed and she felt it rumble through her. She felt warm, satisfied and happy. The sun was comfortable on her bare skin and she could feel his steady heartbeat pulsing through his body beneath her chest. She must have fallen into a hazy doze because the next thing she knew shouting voices nearby had her heart hammering. She pushed herself up onto her elbows and peered over the tall grass surrounding them. Maggie and Glenn were shouting at each other on the other side of the field. Cassidy ducked back down as Maggie whirled around and stomped towards them. They'd managed to flatten quite an impressive area around them with their antics but she could just about keep out of sight. Daryl stirred besides her and she hurriedly clamped her hand over his mouth before he could speak. His eyes narrowed worriedly and she shook her head.
"Just Maggie and Glenn." She whispered, removing her hand as he slumped back against the flattened grass.
"Ashamed?" He suddenly grunted, one arm lying across his forehead shading his eyes against the sun.
"What?" She asked in surprised, blinking at him.
"Scared they might find out you screwed me?"
She stared at him.
"Of course not." She snapped, glancing back over the grass. "They were having a domestic. None of our business." She narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. "Why? Are you ashamed?"
He gave her look that told her she'd said something stupid and she grinned, nudging his ribs with her toe. He squirmed and her face lit up with malicious glee.
"You're ticklish!" She crowed.
He eyed her warily, quite blatantly aroused at the sight of her crouching naked with her tangled hair rippling over her shoulders and a wicked glint in her eye. She would have pounced on him and tickled him until he begged for mercy but the sound of Maggie and Glenn's argument distracted her. She sat and listened without really listening, not wanting to eavesdrop but trying to ascertain whether they were moving closer to them or not. He studied her from under the weight of his uninjured arm. He found himself noticing things he hadn't before. The little silver stars in her ears and the tiny crosses behind them. The delicate silver chain around her neck ending in a pretty silver tear-shaped pendant. There was a bruise in the middle of her back where she'd landed hard while sparring with Lochie a few days ago. Her toenails had been painted red and the polish had started to chip.
"You're staring at me." She grumbled, pink flushing across her cheeks.
"They still there?"
She settled down and leant back, turning her face to the sun.
"Nope. Probably getting down and dirty. Must be the country air."
Daryl choked on his cigarette.
"You think they're-"
"Uh yeah." She gave him an 'obviously' look. "You people are in each other's pockets but you don't know who's doing who?"
She'd stretched her legs out in front of her and he brushed his fingertips over her dirty toes, caressing the arch of her foot.
"I kinda thought… Lochie…"
She lifted her eyebrows at him in amusement, incredibly entertained at the idea of him partaking in some juicy gossip.
"Nah, he's not her type." She leant even further back on the heels of her hands and he watched the shadows at her navel smoothing out as she arched her back.
"Who is?"
He wasn't really interested but keeping her talking would stop her from noticing that he was once again fully aroused.
"Rick."
He snorted.
"He's old enough to be her daddy."
She looked at him very pointedly.
"Pot. Kettle. Black."
"I'm not that old." He grumbled. "What's so bloody exciting about that damn Sheriff?"
"Well he's hot. Good husband, good father. He'd risk his life to protect innocents. He's strong which is always sexy. Not to mention the body-"
"Alright… I'm sorry I asked."
His face had darkened and she grinned, leaning over him.
"Don't get jealous, redneck." She squeezed him until his stomach clenched and he growled. "I promise you, as sexy as Rick is, it wasn't him I was thinking about."
They were very likely to end up staying in that field for the rest of the day and well into the night, had they not heard the voices nearby signalling the searchers' return to camp. Cassidy sighed and, ignoring Daryl's grumblings, groped around for her clothes.
LadyLecter47 – thanks, here's more for you :)
gurl3677 – indeed
tnnurse – thanks. Me too, hope you like it
SaraLostInes – yup, there's more to come about the past too but I really don't like those fics where they spend whole chapters going on about their OC and their past. I like to drop a bit here and there instead.
mvolner – not at all, I'd quite happily cause one if I could guarantee myself a Daryl Dixon into the bargain. Here you go, you can stop holding your breath now :)