Chapter 14: He's Done with a capital "D"

When we arrived, Morgana was on her knees, holding her head between her hands, yelling, "I don't have a sister!"

Morgause was standing over her, "I am telling you, you were taken away! I am your sister!"

"Get away from her!" I yelled flinging Morgause back with a flick of my hand, running to Morgana and holding her to me, "What did you do to her?"

"I would never hurt her!" Morgause cried, standing, "I only told her the truth!"

"What truth?" I asked her, "What could you possibly tell her?"

She pointed at Arthur, "The truth about the Pendragons!"

"The truth about the Pendragons?" Mordred asked, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"They destroyed our family! They separated us. Your father took everything! My family and my right to bond!" she snarled at him.

"You killed your own father!" Arthur snapped back, "I read the files! You killed him in front of your own sister! You couldn't control your own empathy! You destroyed your own family! Don't you dare blame my father for trying to protect her from you!" Morgana flinched and cowered further at his words.

Morgause's face twisted in rage and she lunged at Arthur with a blade and when he dodged, she snatched his arm and attacked him with her empathy. I saw him crumple in pain and growled as I tackled her off him, so she switched her aim for me, but I was ready this time and as her empathy penetrated my shields, I didn't fight her off, instead, I pulled her right in to my maze. My tunnels were a protection of their own. They filtered emotions through them and pushed them right out when needed. I could control all of it when I tried hard enough, I could take her emotions and redistribute it right back. It wasn't something I'd actually had any practice in. I had read a short text on it before, it wasn't something commonly done, but I knew I could do it. I knew some part of me just knew how.

I swallowed her emotions, all of them, the good (which there wasn't any), the bad, and the ugly, sucked them in faster than she could expel them and sent them running through my tunnels. For a moment her face became unreadable, she looked confused, almost bereft, and I was tempted to keep the emotions. Who would Morgause be underneath all the hatred, anger, and pain?

But I couldn't. I had to expel them and the only person who could change these emotions was Morgause. They were her responsibility and I had to return them or they could consume me.

So return them I did. Full throttle. She scurried away from me, gripping her head, unable to handle the intake of her own detrimental emotions. I sat up, "I don't know if you're really Morgana's sister or not," I looked at Morgana, "Or what happened between you and the Pendragons. So I'm going to be nice, because Morgana is my best friend, and not attempt to absolutely destroy you until I find out the truth for her. You're still too dangerous, though," I raised my hand towards to her, "This, Morgause, is what mercy looks like," I said before using the spell, "Swefe nu," and putting her to sleep.

A glance at Arthur, told me he was alright, at least for the time being, "Morgana?" I asked, crawling to her, "Come here."

She looked at me and met me half way and I grabbed her and pulled her into a hug, "I don't know what she told you, but we'll find out the truth together, alright? All of this, we can figure out together and if she does turn out to be your sister, then we'll deal with that, too. Just know, it doesn't make a difference. It doesn't change the amazing person you are."

She hugged me tightly and nodded into my chest, "You'll always be my friend? Even after everything she did to you?"

"I'll always be your family," I corrected, "Just like you will always be mine. She isn't going to change that."

She pulled back, with tears in her eyes, "Thank you, Merlin."

"You don't have to thank me for it," I chuckled, "This is just the way things are. You're my family and that's just the way it is."

We heard a fierce growl breaking through our moment. I turned to face it with a scowl on my face. To see a sentinel, I'd never met before and…

"Nimueh?"

She stood by him, glaring at us as he spoke, "What have you done to my guide?"

"Your guide?" I looked at Morgause, "Her?"

He growled at me and from the corner of my eye, I saw Arthur standing, "Cenred," he explained, "Has been with Morgause for at least 6 months, yet they have remained unbonded. I wonder why that is?"

I stood next to him, and asked again, "Nimueh?"

"Who would've thought?" she started, "That after all this time, the guide wizard turns out to be you. A weak, scrawny little boy."

"But, you're my friend."

"No, you were my cover," she sighed, "And, now, you'll all die."

Nimueh sent out a shot of magic that I quickly matched, before it could hit Arthur. She was powerful, extremely so, and was very easily pushing her magic through mine as Cenred charged at Arthur. Arthur matched him beat for beat, but I was struggling to keep Nimueh's magic at bay.

She was far more skilled than I could have thought to be.

Or maybe I wasn't done thinking of her as a friend. She had fully caught me off guard. She was the last person I expected to be standing up against. "So all this time? Everything was a lie? I don't understand. They tried to capture you!"

"What's not to understand?" she laughed, "It was a plot. You were a payday. A means to an end, but now you're far too much trouble than what you're worth."

"But, we spent so much time together! We've been friends for years!"

"You were always such a naïve, foolish boy!" she said pushing right through my magic and throwing me several feet away.

My body colliding into a tree, knocking the wind out of me as I bounced of it and hit the ground. For a moment, my head spun and I was sure, if I hadn't broken anything before, I definitely had now. I tried shaking it off, but couldn't. Too many injuries.

I heard rustling and saw feet in front of me. Mordred and Morgan were battling Nimueh, while I frantically tried to get my body to cooperate. "Come on," I told myself, as I willed my hands to push myself off the ground, "Come on! Please! Just get up!" But I couldn't, something was wrong with my body. The pain, broken bones, bruising. I was too tired, too worn, too everything. Then I felt two hands grab my shoulders and pull me up, "Seriously, Merlin, if you need help, you can just ask," Gwaine said grinning at me from one side and Elyan on the other saying, "You don't have to struggle on your own."

I almost cried at the sight of them, "I fucking love you guys," I said.

"Of course, what the hell would you do without us?" Elyan laughed, shifting my arm over his shoulder, "Now, come on, those two could use some help."

I nodded and raised my hand to the sky, "If there is one thing you learned about me throughout all these years, Nimueh," I said as I focused all of energy into my magic, "It's that you never fuck with my family!" Every bit of anger and love and pain shot out through my palm, clouds forming in the sky and lightning coming down, crashing into her body. I had been so angry, I hadn't been able to contain my magic, the lightning slightly out of control as it covered her body, exploding and blinding eyes, and I shut my eyes closed and turned away. Once it ended, I saw her body on the ground. I gasped, as rain hit my face, and leaned my weight into Elyan. Blinking back the tears, as my eyes searched for Arthur, finding him crouching on the floor, with his face to the ground doing his best to cover his eyes. Cenred a few feet away, clearly zoned from the light.

"I really can't," I said, "I just can't."

Gwaine nodded at me, letting me go and walking towards Arthur, helping him dial down his senses in my place. I felt everything just drain from my body as the rain soaked me from head to toe. My mind was a mess, my empathy was a mess, my magic was a mess. I'd been stripped raw, taken apart inch by inch. Nimueh's betrayal rode deep in mind. I had trusted her, laughed with her, been willing to trade my life for hers and now I…

I fucking killed her.

I hadn't meant to. I just wanted to make her stop, but I… I killed her.

She betrayed me.

She was my first girlfriend.

My first kiss.

My first date.

It was all a lie.

Holding hands, giggling on my shoulder, spending hours talking about nothing. None of it was real. She was supposed to be my friend. A knight. My people. She had burrowed herself into a place inside my life and all just to make a profit? I was just a 'payday?' I meant nothing to her?

She had been trying to kill me. All of us. Why? Why? Why?

My body shook, the pain was a shock to me. I couldn't comprehend it. I couldn't even try to comprehend it.

I killed Nimueh.

Nimueh who forced me to watch the Notebook thirty times and listen to Taylor Swift. Nimueh who painted my nails pink for fun and wore really red lipstick when she was trying to get me to kiss her for the first time. Nimueh who snuggled on the couch with me telling me all the school gossip, that I never listened to, but I pretended to. Nimueh who pouted her lips and stomped her feet every time I didn't do what she wanted. I killed Nimueh.

But it wasn't Nimueh, was it?

Because the Nimueh I knew was a lie.

The Nimueh who spent countless of hours doing cram sessions with and laughed at all my stupid jokes was a lie. She was a lie. I gasped in pain.

It hurt. It fucking hurt so much. Everything was just pain. Anguish. I felt so broken.

Morgana and Mordred turned to me and he came to my side, throwing my other arm on his shoulder, to help carry my weight.

"Merlin," she said quietly, but I just shook my head, "Not right now. I can't right now. I'm sorry. I can't."

She nodded and placed her hand on my cheek, "I think it's about time we got you home."

"Yeah," I rasped, "Let's do that."

Arthur sent Gwaine to get more of his people and told us to go on without them as he had to check on what was going on with the mini-war that had been going on in the middle of everything, but as they carried me out, we all caught a glimpse of the battle field. Seeing Morgause's guards all subdued. The heavy rain putting out any of the flames I had caused. Gaius spotting us and joining our little group, seemingly exhausted himself. He followed us back in silence.

When we came back to the ambulances, I had Morgana ask about the fire and quickly informed me that the rain was helping the firefighters end it, as they loaded me up to a gurney. Percival, Elena, Daegal, and Helen all sitting in a huddle together, rose to meet me as they put me in the ambulance. I waved silently at them as I closed my eyes.

Between finding my sentinel, losing my sentinel, secret kidnappings, betrayals, secret sisters, car accidents, explosions, fire, caveman sentinels, and everything else, I was just done.

I was so, so done.

Finito.

Put a fork in me.

Gaius informed me that he would be riding back with the group as he promised everyone's parents that he'd keep an eye on them and that he would meet me at the hospital.

I couldn't muster so much as a thanks as they closed the doors to the ambulance. I could only look curiously as a man with a scarred face worked to put an I.V. in my arm, furrowing my brow at him when he pulled out a needle and moved to inject something into to it.

I was out within seconds.