Author's Note: I happen to love Voltaire's "When You're Evil" (thank you, OP!) and loved the idea of the prompt of the Listener teaching the song to Cicero. Hence the following. The words are from the above song-with a little alteration. Only a little. Please, enjoy.
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"When You're...Evil?" 1/1
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Nazir frowned, rising from the table where he'd been reading missives from across Tamriel. He thought he heard—singing? Not Cicero's demented singing. No, this had sounded like the Listener.
But the Listener did not sing. And she certainly did not sing about…being evil?
"Now, Cicero, if you sing with me, I'll give you this wonderful, luscious sweet-roll," purred the velvety voice of the Listener from the other room. How could the promise of a pastry sound like something so much more lascivious, wondered Nazir, reaching down to adjust himself.
"But…Listener…the song is…" came the whine of the Jester-clad madman.
The Listener chuckled—it sounded so dark and malevolent that Nazir felt something stir within himself. "Twisted, my lovely Keeper. And so perfect for our Brotherhood. Please? For me?" Nazir could practically imagine the doleful look that the Listener was casting towards Cicero—the quivering lip was always a nice touch.
A deep sigh from the Keeper. "Very well, Listener." He sounded oddly sane –to be fair, Cicero was far more sane around the Listener than anyone else. Maybe because she was a bit mad herself.
"Now together. I'll teach you my favorite part—you'll like it, I promise you, Cicero. We'll even change some of the words to better fit it to the Brotherhood. Now, one, two, three. 'I'm the fear that keeps you waked. I'm the shadows on the wall. I'm the monsters they become. I'm the nightmare in your skull. I'm a dagger in your back. An extra turn upon the rack. I'm the quivering of your heart. A stabbing pain, a sudden start.'" A quick giggle from the Listener had Nazir leaning forward. "Now for the refrain, my lovely Keeper," crooned the Listener and Nazir could imagine the luscious Listener crawling into the Keeper's lap. "'And it's so easy when you're evil. This is the life, you see. Lord Sithis tips his hat to me. I do it all because I'm evil. And I do it all for free. Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need.'"
Nazir swallowed, settling back in his chair. He had to admit, the song did fit the Brotherhood.
"Now, dear sweet Cicero, here's your sweet-roll, as promised. Oh, and Nazir?" called the voice of the Listener as she padded away from the happily chomping Keeper and into view of the chocolate-skinned Speaker.
Nazir looked up at the curvy woman standing atop the stone stairs. "Yes, my Listener?"
She chuckled, crooking a finger at him in the universal signal of 'come here.' "Would you like me to teach you the rest of the song? It does get SO lonely being evil."
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~FIN~
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