A/N: Okay, so there's some mush in this chapter. Don't hate me mtcosti, lol. Thank you for reading my AU story. I'm flattered that you think I've grown since my last fic. And thanks to Lunarballet as well.

Chapter Thirteen

Are You An Angel?

The next morning Padmé woke up with a searing headache. She'd had a bit too many alcoholic beverages the night before.

It had been a very long time since she had…lost sight of the strict sense of discipline she held.

Everything in her life had been very controlled and calculated. A series of mathematical equations.

One action followed by another action in a specific setting leading to a desired outcome.

Over the year she had learned that life could not be controlled like a scientific experiment. There were too many complexities. Too many complications.

And still she held onto that control tightly.

But she was starting to realize that she was only human and she deserved to fall apart sometimes.

Sometimes it took falling apart to put oneself back together again, to shake out of routine and complacency.

She remembered Siri hugging her and the distant sound of laughing and she was reminded vaguely of Jobal comforting her when she was a child.

She read the five slides of information about current news on the Tatooine conflict on her data-pad.

Initially the Senate had decided to target areas with densely concentrated slavery. Of course this had been a catalyst that had lead to a violent reaction.

Slave Masters needed workers to make profits and so they raided villages relentlessly and the ratio of slaves to free Tatooine inhabitants started becoming a little unbalanced.

There was more interplanetary trading since many previous customers were currently trapped in labor camps.

The senate agreed that some sort of economic sanctions had to be put in place to stop trading with the planet. This was a good solution for republic territories.

Systems that weren't as strongly patrolled and regulated would be an issue.

And even more so, the demand for soldiers would be an issue.

The Kaminoans were constantly releasing new Clone Troopers for the Republic, but the numbers needed to begin patrolling separatist planets were very high.

And then the question rose in their minds. Was it right to try to civilize other planets? Was this rapid ascension toward a time of great Imperialism a good thing?

Was it right to forcefully colonize other planets? Didn't this go against the very meaning of Democracy?

In these moments Padmé wished life was a series of mathematical equations.

She wanted to fix everything. And the pieces just wouldn't fit together.

She dug her fingers into her hair in frustration and sighed.

There was incoming message and a hologram of Obi-wan appeared before her.

"Hello, Obi-wan."

"Hello, Padmé."

"What is it?" She smiled weakly.

"The Council wishes to speak with you."

"About…you and Siri?"

Obi-wan looked stricken with the slightest sense of anxiety for a moment. He smiled awkwardly and chuckled.

"No. Thankfully."

He stopped smiling and Padmé could sense by the change of Obi-wan's expression that whatever he wanted to say revolved around Anakin.

He had displayed that look in the past couple of days and she was attuned to it now.

"No one has told you what lead to Anakin's injuries."

She looked away from the hologram and tried to keep her composure.

"I'm not sure I want to know, Obi-wan." She said very quietly.

"I won't go into details. But he rescued a slave boy."

She looked at the fabric of her gown, draped over her knees.

Obi-wan could see the tension in her jaw and the ligaments in her neck and the firm set of her lips.

"The owner retaliated."

Obi-wan nodded.

"The Council is wondering what to do with the boy. He could stay at the temple's apartments. But he is frightened and alone." Obi-wan hesitated.

"We are asking if you could possibly…let him stay with you in the meantime. I know we could send him to the refugee residences, but he has no family."

Padmé frowned. "Of course I can. Let me just prepare. You can bring him over shortly. Sola has been staying with me the past week so we can both look after him."

"You are a saint, Padmé."

She smiled.

Her eyes looked a little less dead then, a true and genuine smile.

The door slid open and Padmé looked down at the boy.

He had a moppy head of dark brown hair and eyes the color of citrine mixed together with cinnamon. His eyes were a medium brown around the irises and lightened into a greenish gold in the centers and there were specks of dark brown throughout.

He was unusually fair for someone from a desert planet.

"This is Jacen."

Padmé's smile was gentle.

She placed her hand on his shoulder.

"Nice to meet you, Jacen."

He looked nervous.

"H-hello."

"My name is Padmé."

There was an uncomfortable silence and then Padmé motioned for them to come inside.

There was the faint sound of babies crying and Padmé sighed. She looked very sad then.

"If you'll excuse me for just a moment. The babies need me."

When she walked away and disappeared into the next room, Jacen looked at Obi-wan shamefully.

"I didn't know he had a wife and children."

"You didn't get much time to become acquainted with Anakin."

"I wish I had. I could have told him to return me to my Master."

"Why would you wish for a thing like that?"

"If he didn't rescue me my Master wouldn't have hurt him. If it weren't for me he'd be with his family right now. They need him more than me."

"You would accept a lifetime of suffering to protect Anakin? That is very kind. Especially considering the fact that you barely know him."

"Why did he save me?" Jacen asked.

"He was supposed to go with you and the Jedi girl to the outskirts of the city. He could have chosen the easy way out. I could have taken the beating. I'm stronger than I look."

Obi-wan furrowed his brows.

"That is just part of Anakin's nature. He needs to help others."

"But why me? He could have just walked on by."

"Anakin cannot do that."

"Why?"

Obi-wan's eyes looked distant, like he was going to a different point in time.

"Because he started from a place where no one ever bothered to help him. He knows what it's like. You see, Anakin was a slave like you. Tatooine is his home planet. And he would have gone on being a slave if it weren't for my mentor, Qui-Gon Jinn."

Jacen looked pained for a few moments and looked at the furniture of Padmé's apartment.

"He could have left me behind. He put his life on the line for me."

"You shouldn't be so distressed about what happened. Anakin is alright. He's very resilient and he always bounces back after setbacks."

Although Obi-wan wasn't sure he believed what he had just said. He really wanted to. But that was easier said than done. He showed nothing but false hope in front of the boy, though.

"His wife probably hates me. She'll blame me."

"Padmé is not like that. She is a very kind woman and her line of work puts her in danger too. She understands that her husband has to help people. That he wants to."

Jacen still looked ashamed and despairing over his newfound freedom.

Obi-wan placed a hand on the boy's shoulder. Jacen looked up at him.

"You can't change what has already happened. Be thankful for what happened. Repay Anakin by appreciating what Padmée has agreed to do for you. She's giving you her home."

Jacen nodded. "Okay."

Anakin was supposed to come out of his healing sleep today.

Padmé didn't know how she was going to react. She wanted to be strong for Anakin. But she didn't know if she would be able to.

When she walked in he was lying in bed, an arm draped over his face so it covered his eyes. He was clenching his teeth and groaning.

Apparently it took some time for the pain medication to take full effect.

She wanted to reach out and touch him, to draw him up in her arms, but she was afraid she'd hurt him.

She stood a few feet from his bed and didn't say a word.

He sensed the difference in energy and took his arm off his face.

He looked…he looked the worst she'd ever seen him look. He had a very sickly pallor, his skin slightly yellow. Under his eyes were dark circles the color of bruises. His lips weren't their normal pink, but nearly white, matching the rest of his complexion. They looked almost gray.

His cheeks were very hollow and the bone structure in his face was pronounced.

He struggled to sit up, but he wouldn't give up. He refused to look weak in front of her.

It took everything she had not to cry at the sight of him.

Yes, he was alive. But he looked so very dead. Like a living corpse.

He smiled at her. The usual impish smile and his eyes seemed a little brighter.

But she didn't smile back at him and he stopped smiling in response.

"Padmé…" He said softly.

She looked away from him and across the room.

She knew he'd feel rejected as soon as she did so. But the sight of him hurt her. It broke her heart.

"I look like a monster, don't I?"

Her features twisted in despair.

"No." her voice was cracking.

"Why won't you look at me then?"

"I…don't know."

"Don't take me for a fool. Does it disgust you to look at me?"

She looked at him.

"Stop the self-pity, Anakin. It does not disgust me to look at you. You just look very frail and it upsets me a little."

"I'll be alright." He smiled at her reassuringly.

"I know you will. I just don't like seeing you like this."

"Come here. You know, I thought I'd get a much warmer greeting from you." He joked.

"The last time you thought I was going to die you jumped into my arms."

She remembered their first kiss by the wreckage of the transport. That was so long ago.

She walked over to him and sat on the edge of the bed, her eyes avoiding his.

He looked a bit hurt by her avoidance, but pressed on.

"I missed you, Padmé."

His palm molded itself to her cheek. She wouldn't look at him.

His smile wavered and he looked slightly sad. But even so. He bent his neck so their faces were level and locked eyes with her. He pressed his forehead against hers and took her hand in his.

She was crying soundlessly. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Her palm settled over his heartbeat. His hand covered hers lovingly.

"How are Luke and Leia?"

"They're good. But they miss you. They miss your love and your…light."

"Are they here? I want to see them."

"I didn't bring them with me. I didn't know what kind of shape you'd be in."

"I'm fine." He said.

"Sola is watching them. They're alright."

"I thought I died. It felt very real this time. And all I could think about as I was leaving…was you. I don't know how I could live apart from you. And our family."

"You…you would have learned. Life is about letting go sometimes." She said.

The tears spilled over her eyes slowly.

He wiped the droplets off her cheeks.

His mouth was soft and warm on hers and she felt the pain in her soul dissipate. Like falling into a peaceful sleep.

He pulled away and tucked his face into her shoulder, holding her to himself and she could feel him breathing against her.

She could feel the meshing of their spirits, his light warmed every part of her.

She stroked his hair. They had tried to clean him up a bit, but there were the remnants of dried blood in his hair and she could feel the matting underneath her fingers.

Like a stray animal in the cold.

"You need a bath, Ani."

"You should give me one." He joked.

"Well, I don't think you're strong enough for…that kind of a bath."

He laughed weakly.

"I think I can wash your hair."

"I'm a mess, aren't I?"

"A little." She replied.

There were no words after that. She felt him press a few gentle kisses against her pulse point, the tickle of his lashes against her skin and they breathed in time with each other. His heartbeat felt like a butterfly's wings on her chest.

It was true that his first words to her had been , "Are you an angel?"

But she felt in that moment that he was the true angel.

And in a way he always had been.

He was an angel of the force.

A heavenly creature contained in the body of a mortal man.

And he healed her.