Cold Grey Morning – 10th June 2010
That idjit, Chuck, seems to think that writing down our 'feelings' is going to help us get over losing Sam, well it aint! I practically brought up the kid; the times John dumped the boys with me to chase a lead was the only real childhood they got. It hurts losing him, sure, but having to watch Dean pretend like its okay, that's worse. He just acts like it didn't happen, he won't even talk to Cas, he aint the only one who lost something, Cas has lost the only thing he ever knew, hell he's lost most of himself.
We've set up shop in an old summer camp, Dean's thrown himself into making this place liveable, keeping the rest of us safe and drinking. The poor kid just aint coping, he don't sleep any more, he drinks himself into unconsciousness. The rest of them are just ignoring it, well everyone 'cept Cas. Most days I just see him stood alone, staring, it's like he's still trying to tune into Angel radio. They don't seem to be there anymore, or if they are they don't care 'bout us 'mud monkeys' no more. I'm pretty much useless in the resistance, just an old drunk in a wheelchair, and I'm the one coping best!
Bobby Singer