AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Mother of a Mother by Michael Giacchino from the ALIAS soundtrack, 519 Kids by MGMT.
THIRTY-EIGHT
o
The sound of metal clanking alerted Sark to the fact he had a new visitor, something that was few and far between and he only hoped, it wasn't Sydney Bristow again, come back for another round of abuse.
*Mother of a Mother*
His eyes widened in surprise when Irina came to stand before the bars of his cell, in her dark suit jacket and skirt, her hair pulled up in a loose French twist, arms folded over her chest in a defensive posture while her eyes studied him intensely.
Irina looked incredible and... alive. He'd only recently learned she had survived the Execution when Sydney had finished beating the shit out of him with her rage over the death of her friend. In the end, the two of them had reached some semblance of an understanding over Irina, Francie and Allison.
"Irina." Sark stood slowly from where he'd been sitting cross-legged on his small bunk. "You're alive." The corners of his mouth turned up in a small smile as he cautiously approached her, the relief of seeing her again flooded over his face. The last time he had seen her she was extremely pregnant and in her own glass prison cell, now she stood before him back to her former self, perhaps in better condition and free.
"Hello Julian." She smiled at him in an awkward grin, inspecting the boy she raised in the young man before her, making sure he was 'ok.' She knew that Sydney had worked him over rather good a few days ago when she approached him about her friend. His eyes were both black and a piece of tape over his nose signified she had broken his nose, his arm was in a sling from her dislocating it but other then that he looked to be in good condition. Her daughter had shown some restraint.
After her talk with him, and her Execution, Irina had been told Sark had become the model prisoner. Cooperating in every way possible with the CIA.
"How are you?" She asked truly concerned. She was responsible for his life in this business, and his imprisonment even if he'd been the one making the choices…she'd introduced him to the 'dark-side.'
"Well my accommodations are rather dull and boring," He looked around to the dark grey prison walls and bars in the federal prison he was being held at, used by the CIA. "But I suppose I could do worse." He looked at her with his piercing blue eyes. "The question is, Irina, how are you? I thought you were dead until a few days ago when your daughter informed me otherwise."
"No one told you?" Irina's eyes flashed with a hint of concern that all this time, he believed her to be dead.
"No, the CIA doesn't see fit to inform me of anything. I am just a lowly prisoner after all." He shrugged his eyebrows and felt a twinge of pain course over his face from the bruising. "They only told me about your Execution to taunt me."
"I'm sorry, Julian." Irina stepped closer to the bars, her dark eyes searching his baby blues. "I'm here because I refuse to give up on you." She admitted and saw the immediate surprise he tried to hide over the emotion and concern she was showing for him. "You are too young to have your entire life taken away from you; if I get a second chance at happiness, you deserve one as well. I told you I was not giving up on you."
Sark remained silent, studying her face and unsure of what to say. He'd never seen such passion coming out of this woman other then her quest for Rambaldi, especially not towards him. He'd respected her, feared her, looked up to her and adored her and when he learned that she had been executed he had even cried himself softly to sleep in the darkness of his cold cell.
"In case you hadn't noticed, Irina," He looked at her sarcastically, his emotions causing an inner turmoil. "Look at what side of the bars I'm on and according to my sentence, will be for the remainder of my life."
"Only if you choose to be." Irina straightened her stature, using her challenging tone. She was going to get through to this boy, cut through the walls he'd built long ago to protect himself. She'd taught him everything she could; gave him everything she was able to while he was growing up, except the one thing he really needed, the one thing he was craving: her love.
"What are you implying, Irina?" Sark furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.
"I bought your freedom." She shifted on her heels seeing the flicker of hope in his eyes.
"How?" Was the only word he could manage to say…
"I am now in a position to make certain requests, and demands."
"Ah yes," Sarks eyebrows rose with a smug grin, "The Princess said something about your real identity being revealed in order to save your life. So they know that you are 'The Romanov?" He paused while Irina nodded softly. "And you're using this new power and influence to release me from prison?"
"On certain conditions." Irina cocked her eyebrow with a piercing gaze and feral grin.
"And these condition would be?" Sark shifted uncomfortably with excitement and trepidation that reminded Irina of the little boy he used to be.
"You will help us find Sloane and Cuvee. I need someone who knows how my business is run and also how my enemies operate." Her mouth twitched in the corners seeing him studying her in the way she taught him to analyze someone who wants something from you.
"And?" He looked at her cautiously, grabbing the metal bar of his cage with his good hand, knowing from the look in her eyes and the cadence of her voice there was more.
"When we find them, and end this you will start new. Nowhere near this life, this business." Her dark eyes focused so intently on him he wasn't sure she was blinking. "That is non-negotiable or I will leave you in here." Her tone was deadly serious and Sark swallowed hard, but she was still holding something back.
"And what else must I do to earn my freedom?" He sighed, returning her intense gaze. Irina looking every bit the person who'd earned the name 'The Man.'
"There are certain truths about my life that you will learn to accept." Her tone was even and steady as relayed those truths.
"Such as?" Sark's interest was peaked, knowing he was about to learn something about her private life that she'd kept extremely guarded for his entire life.
"My family is the most important thing in the world to me. If anyone tries to harm someone I love and care for, I will show no mercy." She knew he was on pins and needles and could see the almost deflated sigh passing through his body he desperately trying to mask, at 'not' being a part of those she cared for so much. "That family includes you, Julian." She finally let the façade of 'The Man' slip away and smiled softly at him seeing his eyes widen. "I've raised since you were a little boy and I haven't always done what was best for you." She sighed standing straighter, lifting her chin, "When you came into my life I was not the person I am today. I'd lost everything and everyone I ever loved in the blink of an eye, the entire life I knew was gone. The only way I could survive, go on and live, was to close myself from every being hurt again, ever feeling again. I did the best I could with you, with what was left of me." She paused taking a breath, realizing she had never been this open with him before in her life and by the look on his face it terrified him.
Except for the one brief moment when he had visited her in the glass cell, Sark had never seen this side of her, he'd only known Irina as 'The Man.'
"My best was not enough because the one thing you needed more then anything else, I denied you or at least not shown you."
Sark looked away, taking a step back, averting his eyes as he felt tears stinging in them and was not about to cry in front of Irina. The last time he had cried in front of her was the day she had picked him up from that school when he was just a child. He'd almost cried that last time he saw her and she had told him she loved him.
Irina took slow breaths trying to control her own emotions as seeing she was 'right.' The one thing she'd been denying him all these years was the one thing he wanted more then anything. Her eyes found his blurry, forcing him to look at her before she would continue.
"Love, Julian. My love for you." Irina said softly in her motherly tone and Sark's eyes darted away as a tear rolled down his cheek and he ignored it as if it were invisible to both of them.
He felt himself getting choked up and unable to swallow properly and took in a shaky breath.
"You told me that I am the 'only mother you have ever known.' And the same holds true for me with you, Julian." She took another step closer to the bars, "You are the only son I've ever known. I told you that day in my cell that I loved you and I meant that, Julian. I'm sorry that was incapable of showing you that love while you were growing up." She smiled and felt her own tears begin to blur her eyes. It had been far too long to admit that to him, especially seeing the little boy in his eyes now. "I'd like the chance to show you now." Irina watched him intensely trying to gauge his reaction, hoping that 'both' of them would get a second chance with each other and at life. She nodded to the guard at the end of the hallway and he approached the cell and unlocked it, sliding the door wide open and smiling softly at Irina before going back to his post. Irina ran her hand over the bars as she walked slowly to the opening, her eyes still searching. She walked a few steps into the cell and stopped about three feet in front of Sark, who was still looking at the floor. Irina's heart ached for the young man in front of her and in a split decision, made the choice and slowly took the remaining steps. Her arms carefully, bringing him to her, one hand to the back of his neck while the other pressed him to her between his shoulder blades.
Sark was tense and rigid at first but when Irina leaned her head against his and whispered,
"It's all right."
He felt the tension leave his body and closed his eyes, bringing his free arm up to embrace her.
Irina smiled as she wrapped her arms fully around him, holding him close for the first time in his entire life. She couldn't bear to do it when he was a child, the thought alone had brought up painful memories of Sydney and she couldn't allow herself to go there. There would be nights, just after she'd picked him up from the school, that she would stand in his doorway and watch him sleep. His little hands curled up next to his face, his wild curly hair, and the way he looked so small in the enormous bed. Some nights, she'd even brave sitting on the floor next to the bed, watching his little chest rise and fall with every breath and let herself cry silently for her own losses.
When they had stood together for a few minutes, Irina relinquished her hold on him and backed up, cupping his face softly with one hand and brushing away the tear tracks with her beautiful smile in place.
"So you agree to my terms?"
"Yes. I agree." Sark smiled softly and Irina leaned in and kissed him quickly on the cheek. "Thank you…for everything." He added, "I won't let you down this time. You have my promise."
"Then lets get you out of here." She smiled, and nodded towards the open cell door. "We have somewhere to be."
"Really? Where?" Sark's interest was peaked again as they walked briskly down the aisle.
"Home." Irina smiled brightly, seeing the electric shock look on Sark's face.
"What exactly do you mean by that, Irina?" He'd never heard her use the word before, having lived in so many places.
"You've been released into my custody, Julian, until you and I, both prove to this country that you are no longer a threat." She arched her eyebrow at him with a smile. "Once we get Sloane and Cuvee, you'll receive a Full Pardon."
"Oh." Sark was in shock, "And where exactly will we be calling 'home,' Irina?" His mind raced with the possibilities. She'd obviously had Bristow's child, so did that mean they had a 'home' somewhere or were they going back to Russia? He had no idea what the hell was going on, only that he was happy to be of prison after the better part of a year.
"For right now, here in Los Angeles." She handed the security team her clearance badge and winked at the stunned man behind the desk. He had been one of the guards that had kept watch over her while she was imprisoned, even shackling her a few times. Now she stood before him, the future Russian Tsar, with CIA security clearance, releasing a prisoner.
"In the home you shared with Jack Bristow?" Sark squinted upon seeing the son for the first time in almost a year when they walked outside into the parking lot.
"Yes." Irina smiled enigmatically as she pressed the button on her keychain to release the alarm on her Porsche.
"And Agent Bristow is alright with this?" Sark looked at her as if she were going crazy when he got into the passenger side of the car. He couldn't imagine Jack Bristow ever agreeing to such a thing but then again, he couldn't see Jack Bristow outside the CIA or SD-6 setting at all. Yes, he supposed somewhere in his mind he knew the man didn't live there, had a house but he couldn't 'see' it. Nor could he fathom Irina Derevko with Jack Bristow. He'd always been curious to see an interaction between the two, knowing very little about Irina's assignment or her life before she was 'The Man. Now…he was going to be living with them in their 'happy little home.' Things were about to get interesting.
"Yes. Jack and I are in agreement. He is trusting me and I am trusting you." She looked pointedly, before putting on her sunglasses, turning up the volume on the radio and backing up the car.
*519 Kids*
Sark knew what she had meant by that. She was putting her herself on the line for him and he'd better not mess it up.
"Put your seatbelt on." She scolded him, tearing out of the parking lot and sounding very much like a mother in that moment.
"And what about the Princess? I'm sure she can't be too happy about this?" He sighed, struggling with his seatbelt clip with the use of only one arm.
Irina immediately reached over and pushed in the buckle and Sark's eyes widened, watching her mesmerized as if he were seeing a completely different person: her openness, her caring, her choice of music…
"You killed her best friend, Julian," Irina weaved out of the frontage road and onto the freeway, "It's going to take some time. She's willing to work with us on this so don't do anything to goad her to fight with you. I know you're good at that." Her head turned briefly to look at him, before turning her attention back to the road and flying by several cars. "That also means, you have to stop calling her 'Princess.'"
"Well, that's a shame, I was rather fond of it." Sark quirked his eyebrow; enjoying the feel of wind in his hair as they drove west towards the setting sun.
"Do you still resent her? For being my daughter?" Irina asked quietly, barely loud enough to be heard over the car and the wind. Sark turned his head to stare at the woman beside him. Strands of hair were dancing around her face in the blowing wind, with one hand skillfully shifting gears as she waited patiently for a question he'd never thought he'd hear her ask. Hadn't realized, she knew 'why' he had called Sydney the 'Princess.'
"No, I don't suppose I do." He sighed, looking at the city flying by. He was quiet a moment before a wicked grin lit his face and he turned back to Irina. "How about 'Duchess?' She is one after all?"
Irina laughed softly, shaking her head. Sydney and Sark might as well have been brother and sister with their need to provoke one another.
"So can I ask something?" Sark squinted when they went around a mountain and he was blasted with the sunlight. Irina leaned over him and reached into her glove compartment, removing a pair of Jack's sunglasses handing them to him. "Thank you." He smiled awkwardly at her.
"What would you like to know?" Irina fingered a loosed hair behind her ear, zipping around a slow moving car in the fast lane, letting out a mix of Russian curses under her breath.
"How about we begin with…the child. I assume it's another girl with your reference to me in the cell?" He asked tentatively remembering her words 'only son' flashing through his head.
"Yes." Irina laughed at Sark's wording, "It's another girl. Lena Alix Irina," She beamed with pride, "She was the first baby born in a CIA cell."
"Really? They didn't take you to a hospital?" The thought of a woman giving birth in a jail cell was hideous to him. "I can't believe Bristow would stand for that. Having his child born in a glass cell."
"We really didn't have a say in the matter. Jack was trying to get my pardon before her birth but we ran out of time. He almost didn't make it back from D,C. in time." She smirked, remembering that hectic day. "It had turned into a three ring circus rather quickly. Sydney on a mission, Jack was gone and so I was left with Agents Weiss, and Vaughn, Director Kendall and Marshall."
"That bumbling man from SD-6?" Sark cracked a smile remembering Marshall's introduction to him, 'Hi…welcome…don't kill me.' "We're being followed." Sark looked at the Black Mercedes following them since they left the prison.
"Yes. I know. They are part of my security detail," She answered nonchalantly, "And Marshall's such a sweetheart." Irina smiled widely picturing Marshall in St. Petersburg with his hat falling over his eyes.
"And you were pregnant with this child when we extracted you?" He sat somewhat stunned having gone over this a thousand times already in his head after seeing Irina so severely pregnant upon that their last meeting. He'd had a lot of time to go over those three and a half months in great detail, putting the pieces of the puzzle together. He just wanted to hear Irina confirm it. "You were pregnant when I electrocuted you in Germany?" He looked over at Irina and she nodded, remaining silent.
Knowing if that was true, she was also pregnant when Sydney shot her and on all the other missions they went on in that time frame. That fact had become very disturbing to him after seeing her enormous belly where it was obvious a baby had been growing and he could have ended that 'child's' life when he zapped her that day in the office.
'Had she known then she was pregnant?' He had to ask.
"Did you know you were pregnant then?" He asked cautiously.
"No." Irina ran her fingers over her ear again, pushing back the wild hair. "I didn't find out I was pregnant until I awoke two days after surgery almost four months later."
"Surgery?" Sark's eyebrows could be seen rising above the sunglasses.
"Sloane, Cuvee and your father," She looked at him sadly, a mixture of disappointment and anger tinting her words, "Had kidnapped Sydney, setting a trap for me in Moscow. To make a long story short, I was shot multiple times and stabbed."
"By whom? My father?" His own anger rising at the thought of just how far his father's betrayal of Irina went and his own; both father and son betraying her to Sloane.
"No, not your father." She sighed, shifting gears as they went down a hill. "Cuvee stabbed me through my hand," She held it up briefly for him to see, "And shot me in the chest, nicking an artery and collapsing a lung." Her fingers moved to separate the fabric of her button-down blouse and Sark saw the large incision from the open-heart surgery.
"Twice?" He asked, remembering she said 'multiple' and astounded she was still alive.
'Damn him and his inquisitive mind!' Irina internally berated herself. She only had herself to blame for it, she had taught him how to pick up details and keep asking questions.
"No. Not twice. Jack shot me in the abdomen." She looked in the rearview mirror to make sure that her detail was keeping up. She had to keep them on their toes, test them every now and then.
Sark's mouth was hanging open in shock. He couldn't tell what part of that he was more astounded by that Bristow had shot her…in the abdomen while she as pregnant with his child, or that she obviously forgave him for it?
"I know what you're thinking." She smiled out of the corner of her mouth, "I was bleeding very badly from the stab wound and it was running onto the table and onto Sydney, who'd been paralyzed with a neurotoxin. Jack and I weren't exactly on the best of terms then. I had just betrayed him and Sydney for the second time with the extraction in Panama and with his worst enemy, Sloane. He had no idea what my motives were. He reacted to what he saw. Me, with a gun shooting in their direction as I escaped and Sydney lying on the floor covered in blood." She sighed again thinking about how horrible that day was. "He thought he was protecting our daughter. I can't fault him for that. And I didn't know I was pregnant until after my surgery, something he also, obviously didn't know when he fired. Thankfully, he just grazed me." Apparently, this baby was as strong, stubborn and lethal as her mother and sister, Sark thought. "Anymore questions?" She smiled softly at him.
"Several actually. Though I'm certain the great majority will be answered in due time." He winced slightly adjusting his arm, "Why don't you begin by telling me what is your part, exactly, in the Rambaldi Prophecy?"
Irina took a deep breath and broke into the long story of what had transpired with Sloane since Mexico City. When they pulled into the driveway a half hour later, Sark's eyes boggled from his head.
It was the home out of a typical American fairytale, white picket fence and all. Never in his life, would he have pictured either Irina Derevko or Jack Bristow living in such a place.
Irina smiled brightly as she turned off the car, "We're home!" She said in a chipper voice and laughed when she saw the look on Sark's face. Irina retrieved her purse and keys, before moving around the car to help Sark stand with his limited capabilities. "I took the liberty of buying you new clothes and they are waiting for you in the spare bedroom." She smiled, pushing her sunglasses to the top of her head as they walked up the steps.
"Hello Yuri." She greeted her large bodyguard in Russian as he opened the door for them.
"Your Highness." He bowed slightly with a smile and Sark cocked his eyebrow at him with fascination over his formal address of Irina.
Irina stepped inside, setting her purse on the table by the entry way as she made her way to the kitchen.
Sark hot on her heels, absorbing everything around him in the 'home' of Irina Derevko and Jack Bristow, cautiously looking for her former…or was it current, husband? Guessing from the new ring on her left hand something had happened between the two.
"He's not here." Irina smiled with her back to him as she retrieved her insulin from the refrigerator, knowing Sark was on alert for Jack. "He took the baby for a walk." She turned setting her supplies on the counter, smiling. "Father-daughter time."
Sark couldn't hide the surprise or complete stun that raced across his features with that thought.
"When should we expect them back?" He watched with wonder as Irina pricked her finger and tested her blood.
"Any minute actually." She smiled, reading her results and filling a syringe with the necessary amount of insulin.
"What are you doing?" His voice raised an octave as he watched her unbutton her jacket and lift her shirt, sliding the needle into her stomach and he saw the long scar that must have been inflicted by Bristow's shooting.
"Ah," She sighed, realizing he had no idea what happened in the Execution. "Lasting effects of 'coming back from the dead." Her mouth quirked into a funny grin as she shrugged and threw the syringe into the orange plastic container on the counter.
"What do you mean?" Sark swallowed the lump in his throat as he stood perfectly still in the kitchen watching as she tucked her shirt back in.
"I was legally dead for over thirty minutes." She sighed, reaching for two glasses out of the cupboard and opening the refrigerator, retrieving a bottle of grape juice. "I sustained some permanent damage." She added quietly, trying to look at ease seeing his discomfort with this information. "I've lost all pancreatic function, no longer producing insulin. So I have to take injections as though I were a diabetic."
"Irina, I'm…" He was about to say 'sorry' when she held her hand up to stop him.
"You have nothing to be sorry for." She smiled softly, handing him a glass of juice as well, "I'm alive and that's all that matters."
Sark returned the soft smile, taking the juice gratefully after a year of nothing but stale water and rancid orange juice.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
"Irina?" Jack called from the other room, wondering where she was.
"In the kitchen." She replied in almost a sing-song voice with a sparkle in her eye, excited to see her husband and baby.
"Hey." He smiled when he came into the kitchen carrying Lena in the Baby-Bjorn against his chest and Sark's eyes popped out as Jack immediately captured Irina's face with his hands and kissed her. His eyes finally caught Sark's standing awkwardly on the other side of the kitchen and Jack's smile faded.
"Mr. Sark." Jack greeted him coolly. 'He really was just a kid...' Jack thought staring at him. "Seems you're going to be staying with us awhile." He spoke in a tone that could only be described as Jack Bristow.
"It would seem that way, yes, sir." Sark regarded Jack carefully, standing there looking stern and yet oddly soft with a tiny infant strapped to his chest.
"Irina has assured me that we can trust you." Jack's eyes intense as he looked over the young arrogant man in front of him.
"Yes, sir." Sark nodded, standing perfectly still as he had a stare down with Jack.
"Irina believes in you." Jack's eyes shifted to his wife's and she smiled at him then shifted her gaze back to Sark. "Don't disappoint her. Are we clear?"
"Yes, sir. Very clear." Sark's eyes locked onto Irina's. He wasn't going to let her down again.
"All right then." Jack nodded, they had reached an understanding.
Irina stepped in front of Jack, smiling brightly into his eyes trying not to laugh at the charade of 'Mr. Business' he'd just used on Julian as she undid the latch and lifted Lena out of the carrier and into her arms.
She peppered the baby's head, face and neck with kisses, inhaling her scent with her eyes closed and a smile, murmuring 'I love you and I missed you' in Russian softly in the baby's ear.
Sark had just witnessed first hand, for the first time, Irina Derevko as a loving mother and it took his breath away. She opened her eyes wearing the biggest smile he had ever seen and nuzzled her baby's face as she walked towards him with the child.
"Lena," She looked down softly into her baby's big bright eyes, "I'd like you to meet," She looked back up at Sark standing directly in front of her, "Your big brother. Julian."
Sark looked at her with mouth agape, unable to move or blink, overwhelmed with the enormous gesture that Irina really was thinking of him like a son.
Irina smiled warmly seeing the surprise in his face. She'd discussed her feelings about Julian with Jack and he had decided that if Sark was that important to her, he would try with the 'boy.'
He also knew, that if Sark felt like he was really a part of Irina's family, he'd be less likely to turn on her again or hurt her family. 'Big Brother' could work to their advantage and it never hurt to have yet another person looking after their baby.
Sark looked down to the baby in Irina's arms and felt something he never had before, a sense of belonging. He had betrayed Irina to her enemy, and now he stood in her kitchen, with her family and she was asking him to be a part of it.
Lena's features were easily recognizable as Irina's, including the arched eyebrow she was giving him now and he couldn't help but smile softly. He reached his finger up tentatively to her little hand and then stopped suddenly, coiling it back with hesitation. He'd never dealt with a baby a day in his life and hadn't really thought much about them until this moment…looking at the 'love' child of Irina Derevko and Jack Bristow.
"It's ok." Irina said softly, seeing his hesitation and urging him to start forming a new bond.
Sark extended his finger again and grazed the bottom of Lena's little palm, her tiny fingers immediately closing around his finger tightly and Sark smiled.
"She… is beautiful, Irina." He added shyly, caressing the back of Lena's soft hand with his thumb.
"Thank you." She smiled in return, seeing a new sparkle in his eye. "I'm sure you'd love to take a shower and get out of those clothes." She laughed, looking at his blue prison scrubs. "I'll show you to your room and get started on dinner while you're getting ready. If you are anything like me, you're starving for some 'real' food after that long in CIA custody." She winked at him, rolling her eyes at angle for Sark to look at Jack whose brow suddenly creased and Sark's grin told her she was right.
Sark was amazed at just how well Irina knew the enigma that was Jack Bristow.
"Yes. That food, if it can even be called such, was rather dreadful." He smiled smugly at Jack as he followed Irina out of the kitchen. They walked past several closed doors in the hallway and turned at the very end into a small 'L' shape.
One open door was at its very end and from the looks of it, Sydney Bristow's old room. Irina opened the door just before it and showed him inside the bright beautiful room.
"Your bathroom is there." She pointed to a door on the other side of the room. "Your clothes are all put away in the drawers and closet. I hope I did alright picking out things with your taste in mind."
She gave him a lopsided grin as she swayed with the baby, whose face was nuzzled into Irina's neck and falling asleep. A sight, Sark could still not get used to.
"I'm sure everything is wonderful." Sark said graciously. "Thank you again…Irina, for taking this chance on me."
"I know you won't let me down." She walked by him, brushing his cheek with a quick kiss before pulling the door closed behind them.
Sark stood stunned for a moment before moving towards the bathroom.
"Thank you, Jack." Irina breezed up behind him quietly, kissing the back of his neck with a smile as he chopped onions. She knew how hard it was for him to trust her on this, trust her feeling about Sark but despite of his doubts, he was going along with her on this. "It means a great deal to me that you're trusting me on this." She spoke softly, looking into his eyes when he had turned to face her.
"I know." He smiled softly, leaning in to kiss her. "If it means this much to you, it means that much to me." He laughed softly, kissing Lena's head softly in the crook of Irina's neck. "Somehow, our crazy family will make all of this work." He kissed her lips again, pulling away slowly, sucking slightly on her bottom lip. "I love you." He whispered in Russian, looking into her eyes with a smile, before turning quickly and setting back to the task at hand.
Irina pulled softly on his arm until her mouth met his ear in a soft kiss.
"I love you, Panama Jack." Her eyes sparkled with deviant laughter.
"Are Sydney and Vaughn joining us?" Jack asked with his back to her as she began pulling things out of the refrigerator.
"Nooooo." Irina extended the vowel softly, shaking her head with wide-eyes. "Julian's already freaked out enough being here, with you, with me!" She laughed, closing the door, "Jack I know you don't realize this, but he's never seen me like this."
"How's this?" Jack turned to stare at her curiously.
"This!" She pointed to herself and the baby against her chest with a smile, "He's never seen 'me' the real 'me.' All he knows is 'The Man,' and that personality."
"How many of those do you have?" Jack asked with a smug look. "Let's see there was Laura, and Irina, 'The Man'… and 'Uumph!" He caught the bag of carrots she had just winged with one hand into his gut.
"You be quiet!" She pointed at him with narrow eyebrows using a carrot, trying not to smile before she finally broke into a deep giggle.
"Well that explains an awful lot about Sark right there then." Jack raised his eyebrows, chuckling. "How confusing for a man to be raised by a woman who is known as 'The Man.' Not to mention that 'delightful' personality that goes along with it."
"Be quiet, Jack Bristow, or you're going to get carrot in your ear!" She waved the long orange vegetable at him like a sword, trying not to laugh.
"Hey, hey, hey!" He walked up behind her, rubbing up against her back with an onion in one hand and a knife in the other, whispering huskily into her ear, "I didn't say that 'delightful' personality was all bad." He kissed her ear with an open mouthed kiss that sent shivers down her spine as her breathing quickened. "I do seem to recall you using it rather affectively in that shower on Christmas. So commanding…I like it." He kissed her cheek again quickly seeing her cheeks flush and walked away smugly that he had flustered her into arousal.
"Noted." She flashed her seductive eyes and smile, using her deep, thick Russian voice on him watching him tense when she had the desired effect on him.
"You'd better watch it, Derevko, or I'll have to take you right here on the kitchen island." Jack tried shaking his head of those thoughts and stop the twitching in his groin.
"Oh yeah, we'll really freak Julian out then if he walks in on that!" She started laughing, making her body shake as she shook her head and tried concentrating on her carrots and not the pulsating swirl she felt building inside her.
"I just knew that little British twit was going to put a hamper on our love life." Jack grumbled and ferociously attacked the onion with his knife.
"Jack, he will do no such thing." She turned back to him, waggling her eyebrows. "We'll just have to get more creative."
"Is that a challenge?" He raised his eyebrows expectantly, liking the games they played dealing with wit and sex.
"It sure is." She licked then bit her lip, noticing his eyes darting to her mouth.
"Oo,h I got one." He whispered deeply after a moment, brushing against her as he picked up the bag of potatoes, "The laundry room. If I remember correctly, you always liked the 'spin cycle."
"Ooh yes! That is a good one." Irina shook her head with deviant laughter. "And we can always go take a 'drive,' in the car." She returned just as seductively, brushing against his arm grabbing a pan.
"Oh yeah, I definitely like that one." Jack bit his lip, feeling himself growing hard with just the thought of Irina taking control of his stick shift. "Ok, ok, ok…we have to stop now or I won't be held responsible for the shocked induced coma we're bound to give Sark." He breathed out through pursed lips sticking his head in the freezer to cool off.
"That's the wrong head, Sweetheart." Irina walked by and grabbed his groin, making his hips jerk.
"Stop it woman!" Jack yelled into the tubs of Ben & Jerry's, ice cubes and frozen meat.
Irina burst out laughing and that's the sound Sark heard when he emerged from his room. The sound of Irina's laughter filling the house; the entire thing felt like he had walked into another universe. He paused by the doorframe of Sydney's old room, hesitating momentarily about invading her space and then deciding that if the door was open, it was free game.
'So this is 'Super Spy Sydney's' room.' He thought to himself as he walked cautiously around the room, taking it in. The dolls and high school trophies, the posters and books; the photos on her nightstand caught his eye and he carefully picked them up, gasping audibly when he looked at the life of the woman Irina had been talking about in the cell earlier in the day. The life and loves she had lost to leave her empty.
The photo of a beautiful young Irina rocking Sydney as a tiny baby was breathtaking and impossibly serene and he wondered briefly if his own mother had held him with such a loving embrace, probably not, she never wanted children.
Irina couldn't have been much younger then he was now when she had Sydney and he couldn't imagine what her assignment must have been like for her. She obviously loved the baby she held in her arms the smile in her sleep could not be a lie. He set the frame down carefully and looked at the other, a smile tugging at his closed lips seeing Sydney dressed as a 'Princess,' her little arms thrown tightly around…her mother. Sydney was probably about five or six years old he guessed from looking at it, and if doing his math correctly, would have been taken around the time Irina had been extracted.
He sighed, as his thumb traced over the photo of their smiling faces…the happiness and love between mother and child.
Setting the frame back on the table he realized that Sydney Bristow had gone to bed and woken up every morning of her childhood and adolescences to those photos. Trying to hold onto the memory of the mother she loved and believed dead. The photos and the few memories she sustained were all that she had of her mother for over two-decades. When Sydney was little and lying in this bed, holding these photos, probably talking to them if he knew Sydney, talking to her mother whom she believed was in heaven when in reality, she was on the other side of the world with him.
Sydney had her mother for six years and the love she shared with her had sustained her for twenty-one years. She'd been living off the love of the memories of her mother, while he'd been living with the reality in isolation. Sark heard another peel of laughter ring through the house from downstairs and he smiled softly wondering what their lives had been like before Irina was extracted, before Laura Bristow died.
He moved to the wall opposite of Sydney's desk and his breath caught at the face staring back at him. His mind instantly flashed to his lost love, 'Allison,' but he knew this was the real woman that face belonged to, Francie Calfo, Sydney's best friend. There were at least forty pictures of them together starting from about ten years of age through high school and into college. Ballet recitals and baseball games, beach parties and track meets, dress up parties and Halloween, camping in the woods and slumber parties, school dances and ski trips…the two seemed inseparable. She seemed like, the kind of friend he wanted to have…His heart felt heavy for the first time when thinking about Sydney's friend's death and his responsibility for it. He could have chosen someone else but when Sloane suggested the young woman, who was Sydney's friend, as a good candidate, Sark immediately jumped at the chance to hit Sydney where it hurt, out of some childish jealousy over Irina's love and affections. He hadn't thought of her friend as a person, merely a pawn in their game.
He realized now, that he had taken away the two women whom Sydney Bristow had loved the most in her lifetime, whether intentionally as he did with her friend Francie, or inadvertently by spending time with her mother Irina, that should have belonged to her. Somehow telling her, 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem quite adequate.
"Hi." Irina called to him softly from the door, having watched him from the doorway for quite sometime, seeing the rapid range of emotions flitting across his features as he looked at the pictures of Sydney and Francie, the best friend who's life he took. She saw the faint smiles, the sadness and remorse, and she wasn't quite sure but maybe understanding from Sydney's side of the fence.
"Irina, I was just…The door was open." He turned quickly, flustered with words for the first time in his life, feeling like he'd been caught.
"It's alright." Irina smiled softly, entering the room, barefoot, in jeans and a red shirt like something they'd wear in Thailand. Her hair had been released from its clip and hung long and loose in big waves down her back.
The baby was still asleep against her shoulder, as if Irina didn't want to put her down, afraid she would lose her and glancing back to the photos on Sydney's nightstand, he finally understood 'why.'
"See. I was right, Sydney is a 'Princess." He laughed softly, picking up the photo of she and Irina from Halloween.
Irina smiled sadly, at their faces in the photo.
"But you still can't call her that Julian." She raised her eyes to his, with her defiant eyebrow and a smile.
"I must admit, I am a bit in awe standing here, in this room," He paused looking around again, "Looking at the things from her past and realizing that there really was…is a life for Sydney Bristow 'outside' of being a Super Agent. That 'people'… not objects, are and have been, the source of her drive and motivation in life."
Irina stood quietly by the end of the bed for a moment, taken back.
"Yes," She said quietly, lips pressed to Lena's silky hair, smiling softly…proud of her daughter for never losing sight of what's important in life…the people in it. "Her friends…Vaughn…her father…perfect strangers." Irina chuckled softly as she nuzzled her Lena's little head.
Sark watched Irina's movements, her reaction, the way she held the baby in her arms, the loving nuzzles and caresses all second nature, doing it without thought. She had listed the people that had been Sydney's drive and motivation but she left out, perhaps, the most important one of all…herself.
"My assessment," Sark began, catching her eyes with his own as he took a few steps toward her and then sat beside her on the bed, "Is that you, Irina, must have been an incredible mother to Sydney for the six years you were together, for just the mere memory of you," He glanced over to the photos on the nightstand and Irina's eyes followed, "To carry her, drive her for the last twenty-one years of her life." His head slowly turned back to her face and saw a flicker of tears start to well in her eyes. The corners of his mouth turned into a slow smile and Irina leaned over and kissed his cheek, wrapping her free arm around him, overcome by the sentiment of the at statement. "Your children are very blessed to have you as their mother, Irina." He said quietly over her shoulder as his own arm came up to hold her there, absorbing her motherly embrace like a sponge, craving it now that he had a taste of what it felt 'd seen this woman kill people with her bare hands in the most vile of ways and yet now, he felt that the safest and most loving place in the world might just very well be in her motherly arms. 'Why couldn't his own mother have been like, Irina?' His own mother had never shown him any kind of affection when she was alive neither did his father. Maybe that is why he craved it; a mother's love and affection had always been the unknown until now; at twenty-three years old.
Jack had come quietly up the stairs to see where they were and what was taking them so long, dinner had been on the table for ten minutes. He had heard their voices coming from Sydney's old room and he had heard the last part of their conversation…with Irina naming the people that kept Sydney going in her life, and he too, immediately noted that she had left herself out. He was surprised that Sark had caught it too, and even more surprised by what he had told her, and his insight about it was astounding. He had opened Jack's eyes to a new way of thinking about it…he had always believed that it was Sydney's love for her mother that motivated her, kept her going…and that was true to an extent, but that love, that strong unbreakable bond had formed because of the incredible mother Irina had been to Sydney in those six years.
It was Irina's love for Sydney, not Sydney's love for Irina that had inspired that motivation. Perhaps Irina was right to believe in him. She saw a potential in this young man when no one else did and arming Sark with that knowledge, of her love and belief in him…he was beginning to see a new side to life.
Jack didn't want to feel like he was spying on them so he decided to head into the room as if he hadn't heard a thing. His eyes flashed wide in surprise when he found them sitting on Sydney's bed, hugging, both with tears in their eyes.
"Sorry to interrupt." Jack said softly, leaning against the doorway with his hand, not wanting to intrude more then he already had.
Sark had instantly released Irina and she had turned to face Jack with a soft smile, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
"I just wanted to let you know that dinner is ready." He smiled softly in return. "Normally I'd say to 'hell with it' that's what the oven and microwaves are for, but Irina, you need to eat." He added softly, not wanting to sound like a nag but he loved the woman and wanted her healthy and safe.
"Ok." Irina smiled, touched by her husbands concern and the way he was handling having Sark in their home, in her life and his. She stood, adjusting Lena and dropped a soft kiss to Sark's forehead, tilting his chin to look at her, "Thank you." She smiled, affected by his words. He nodded with a small smile, moving to stand beside her.
Irina moved towards the door, full of emotion and extremely thankful, grabbed Jack by the front of the shirt, crashing her lips to his in an intense but rapid kiss, whispering 'I love you' in Russian to him before walking past leaving him breathless and off-balance leaning back against the door.
Sark's eyebrows were somewhere near his hairline caught off guard by Irina's move just as much as Jack. He finally broke into a sneaky smug smile when Jack's eyes darted to his, and Sark just shook his head, staring at the floor.
'Yes, life at the Derevko/Bristow residence was certainly more entertaining then that dreadfully boring prison cell.'