IX.

Keep Me Out

Do we break when our bodies breaks?

Do we give up? Well, yes. That is the short answer; the long one is multi-factored and much too numerous to list, but to burn our own kingdoms would make us very foolish kings indeed. However, we do. As humans we are incapable of acceptance, we are unable to help and to receive help; after all; who truly deserves it? Not I. Not me who threw my own self down, one last defiant leap that left me plunged into the midst of snow, carnage, disgrace, shame and poverty. Gasping for breath and yet unable to even clutch the others around me, to shove them down and snatch at their own air, my mind is troubled by the vast emptiness in my lungs. I am too weak to steal anymore; but I am not too weak to hope. I only hope that I can cling to the bluffs before I sink deeper; deeper into the black. I will one day emerge, brighter and more wonderful than any of those I stepped over to reach my greatness.

Airless, Lily found the little room. Two weeks she had been embedded under the concrete on the orders of Bane. She sat furiously, her strength building with each ounce of hatred she poured into her own mind as she thought of him. His stupid mask. His silly voice and self-righteous nature. Slowly her hands began to shrink; tightened by the fists she balled. Her breath became more fluid; smoothed with the heat of her breaths as she exhaled in a powerful puff at her incarceration beneath the city.

Her hands still had that odd blue twinge to them; her skin was still grey, dull like the skin of a corpse. Lily felt stronger though. Hardened by this exile, she crushed it down and felt it cool, freezing her insides. Had she become some sort of granite? No, but she could feel her indifference to her own torture diminish with each new boring day she spent in her clammy little room. Lily was beginning to feel...Alive again.

"You seem troubled today, souris."

Barsad noted one day while he wasted an afternoon in her room.

Lily ignored him, she was sitting at her little desk flicking through one of the books which had been left in her room, presumably for her to read; ha, what relief from boredom they brought her – Lily could barely read. She pretended though, made a show for Barsad; she'd make sure it seemed to him that she was at a different place in the book every time he graced her with a chilly visit.

"I'm fine," Lily lied and shirked as she recognised that echoed fib she always used.

She looked away from the book. Barsad was sitting on her bed, reclined back on his elbow. He had taken to coming down every few days; Lily thought he just came down to slack off in all honesty. Turning, she sniffed slightly; her little nose twitching like a rabbit's.

"What does 'souris' mean?"

Lily asked with a frown. Barsad shrugged in his rude way and jerked his head. He was rolling a cigarette, his callous fingers rolling the tobacco and skin easily. Lily watched him a moment and flexed her cold fingers, forgetting Barsad for a moment before he explained;

"It's French for 'mouse.'

He licked the paper and rolled the cigarette until it was now a short white tube and popped it in his chops. Lily scowled at him;

"Mouse, really? Isn't that a little...obvious?"

"What would you rather? Because 'boche' comes to mind too."

Lily raised an eyebrow and cocked her head curiously as Barsad lit his freshly-rolled cigarette and eyed her through the smog of smoke.

"And what does that mean?" She demanded as he chuckled,

"Stubborn. Did you really think I believed you could even read?"

Lily flushed and looked away. Defeated by her own shame again and sighed.

"No," She admitted, her breath heavy. "Have you been all around the world?"

She asked quietly and Barsad nodded his head nonchalant,

"Been here, been there; every where's the same after a while. The sun's always hot, the snow's always cold; the people are always fighting and dying...Places are all the same."

With a sigh, Lily looked away as Barsad abandoned the conversation. She watched him get up smoothly from the bed and blow out a plume of smoke as he made his way over to the door.

"So, d'you need anything else?" He asked shortly.

Lily shook her head mutely. Barsad ducked his head and went from the room without another word. She started and got to her feet; her stick-thin legs a little stronger; she bolted for the door after Barsad,

"Hey!" She hollered as she tore open the door.

Barsad peered back, his expression looked confused and slightly annoyed.

"What is it?" He demanded and Lily shuffled out of the room,

"When can I go outside?" She inquired.

Barsad raised an eyebrow and provided,

"When Bane allows it, now get back in -"

"He can't keep me here like this. I want to go back up-"

She was cut off by Barsad's crack of laughter; smoke billowed from his mouth as he chuckled. Lily's scowl was deep while she waited for him to sober.

"He can keep you here. That's the point. You'll stay put until he tells me to do otherwise with you."

Lily frowned,

"Has he been telling you to come down here?"

"Of course. Do you think I'd come down here to share your company unless I was ordered to?"

"Bit rude..." Lily mumbled, "But no...No, I don't think you would." She conceded.

"Right then, back in your room." Barsad ordered stoutly before turning on his heel and leaving.

Lily watched him go, longing to follow him just to stick it to Bane but she thought it safer to simply return to her room. The small room was beginning to press on Lily's mind; she thought she was going stir crazy in here. She didn't even have any idea of time, the only noises she heard was the mercenaries all rummaging about upstairs and the grind of the underground train sometimes. Lily thought of the sky; she missed it.

She missed so much about the outside that she berated herself for forgoing it for the sewers. She resented Bane for plucking her from the streets when before she would have probably worshipped him for it. Lily clenched her blue fists and promised herself that if she ever saw the sun again; she'd tell that bastard exactly what she thought of him and his liberation.

If she ever saw the sun again...

Are my chapters too long or too short? I can never tell...Let me know, please? It'd be a big big help! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! And thank you to everyone who's reviewed, faved and followed; it's wonderful that you guys are enjoying the fic so far and I hope you continue to read.

(^^)