Okaydokay, First, I want to apologize for the wait. My only excuse is that my boyfriend of two years broke up with me. I've been sulking and feeling pathetic for myself for weeks now. I'm sorry for putting you all all up in my business, but I felt I owed SOME kind of explanation.
Anyway, onto more important matters: The iCarly Seddie arc. I think we all know exactly how amazing those episodes were. It sucks that they had to break up, but... Still. I think my favorite of them all was...iCan't Take It. But they were all serious awesomeness. Hopefully, they'll get back together soon, I mean did you see the way they were acting in iLove You? They extended the breakup for two hours! Whoop! And then iQ... I don't even know about that one. I feel like going back and watching the seddie arc again.. :) BUT, on to the chapter you all have been waiting for. My apologies once more.
Here's what you missed on Glee!
Rachel Berry threw a party which sucked at first but then Puck broke into her dads' liquor cabinet. Rachel and Blaine and Sam and Freddie had some intense kisses during a game of Spin the bottle. So did Carly and Sam, now they can truthfully sing the song 'I Kissed a Girl'
And that's what you missed on Glee!
Glee!
.
.
"Oh my ham." Sam groaned as she slouched against her locker that Monday. Carly walked up with her bag, having already gotten her stuff, and slouched on the locker next to Sam's and Freddie's. Her hair was in a pony tail and she was holding a coffee cup. She was in a horrible mood because she was still hung over from the party, and she looked like crap.
"You got that right. I look like a monster," Carly motioned to her face, "I'm not even wearing make up."
Freddie, who hadn't been drinking at the party, smirked at them. "I told you two to stop after the first couple drinks-"
"Shut up Nerd face." Sam glared, closing her eyes and trying to ignore the massive headache she had.
"I have had the worst hangover since Saturday and it's Monday." Mercedes said as she and the rest of the crew joined the three. Quinn smiled at Sam and Carly. They had had to reschedule their sleepover.
"I've been dry heaving all weekend and when my mother asked what the sound was I said I was practicing bird calls." Santana added.
"I slept all weekend. And I couldn't eat! I had to eat crackers and drink ginger ale and other nasty stuff that wouldn't upset my stomach. I almost killed myself from lack of meat. I don't even want to look at alcohol again." Sam pouted, looking hilarious with her messier than usual curls.
"What happened to 'I can hold my liquor'?" Freddie mocked. He, Kurt and Finn had been the only ones not drinking.
"Fredsober, shut your mouth before I shut it for you!" Sam weakly held her fist up.
"No! Please Don't shut anything!" Carly begged, having zoned out and guessed they were talking about a locker.
"You guys, I can't stop barfing." Mike whispered hoarsely.
"Don't say barf." Tina warned.
"I caught a whiff of hairspray and threw up in the girls bathroom." Santana piped up.
"I told my mom I had the flu and she made me traditional tea made out of panda hair." Mike continued.
"Can we talk about anything else?" Tina pleaded.
"How about some Bloody Mary's yall?" Artie said, wheeling up to the group and holding out paper cups.
"Are you kidding me?" Sam asked
"The last thing I want to do is drink" Mercedes finished.
"It'll help your hangover. That's what Bloody Mary's are for." Artie explained, and finally everyone took a cup and Artie poured them drinks, "Hair of the dog that done bit yo ass."
"Okay, as you all know, this week is Alcohol Awareness week. And we have that big assembly at the end of the week to talk about the dangers of drinking. Well, Principal Figgins has asked us to sing a song at the assembly!" Mr. Schue announced at rehearsal that afternoon.
Grumbles and grunts of approval filled the room and Mr. Schue narrowed his eyes at them as they all slouched in their seats and hid behind their sunglasses, "Why so glum?" He asked.
"Ehhh." Sam replied.
"Rough weekend." Mercedes explained. The Bloody Mary's had helped but they all still felt a little crummy.
"Well Cheer up you guys!" Mr. Schue exclaimed, "This is great! Figgins is finally trusting us to perform in front of the school again without causing a sex riot."
Santana shrugged in agreement, "We do have a tendency of doing that..."
"Yeah, we do. And now's our chance to make up for it!" He picked up a marker and walked and smiled at the group, "So, any ideas?"
Artie raised his hand and shared a look with the rest of the group, "I've got one."
.
.
.
.
.
[Artie:]
Blame it on the goose
Got you feeling loose
Blame it on the 'tron
Got you in the zone
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
[Freddie:]
Aye she say she usually don't
But I know that she front
Cause shawty know what she want
But she don't wanna seem like she's easy
[Puck:]
I ain't saying what you won't do
But you know we probably gonna do
What you been feenin' deep inside
Don't lie now
[Santana:] Boy what you drinking?
Gonna let sink in
Here for the weekend
Thinking
We can
See where we can be if we press fast forward
Just one more round and you're down I'd know it
[Artie:]
Fill another cup up
Feeling on yo butt what?
You don't even care now
I was unaware how fine you were
Before my buzz set in
My buzz set in...
[All:]
Blame it on the goose
Got you feeling loose
Blame it on the 'tron
Got you in the zone
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the vodka
Blame it on the henny
Blame it on the blue tap
Got you feeling dizzy
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
[Artie:]
Oh see
She spilled some drank on me
And now I'm knowin' she's tipsy
She put her body on me
And she keep staring me right in my eyes
[Evan:]
No telling what I'm gonna do
Baby I would rather show you
What you been missing in your life
when I get inside.
[Mercedes:]
Boy what you drinking?
Gonna let sink in
Here for the weekend
Thinking
We can
See what we can be if we press fast forward
Just one more round and you're down I'd know it
[Artie:]
Fill another cup up
Feelin on yo butt what? You don't even care now
I was unaware how fine you were
Before my buzz set in
my buzz set in..
[All:]
Blame it on the goose
Got you feeling loose
Blame it on Patron
Got you in the zone
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the vodka
Blame it on the henny
Blame it on the blue top
Got you feeling dizzy
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
[Artie & Sam]
Now to tha ballas poppin' bottles
With their Henny in their cups
Screamin' money ain't a thang
If it ain't throw it up in the sky (in the sky)
And hold your drinks up high (up high)
[Puck & Carly:]
And to my independent mamas
Who can buy their own bottles
If you looking like a model
When them broke fellas holla
Tell them byeee (bye)
And hold your drinks up high (high)
[All:]
Blame it on the Goose
Got you feelin loose
Blame it on the 'tron
Got you in the zone
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the vodka
Blame it on the henny
Blame it on that blue tap
Gotcha feelin' dizzy
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
Blame it on the a-a-alcohol
.
.
.
.
So?" Carly asked Mr. Schue as they finished up their number, "What do you think?"
Mr. Schue cocked his head to the side and frowned slightly, "It's a good song. And you all did great with it. Especially all of the effects. But I think it advertises alcohol rather than warning of it."
"Well," Brittany spoke up, "Most of the songs that warn about drinking are lame and used in the same educational videos every year."
Mr. Schue knitted his eyebrows together, "We just aren't looking hard enough! Just think about it you all and let's see what we can come up with by next time."
"Hello?" Carly yawned into her phone as she and Sam made their way to Cheerios practice. She hoisted her bag farther up onto her shoulder as Sam downed another Bloody Mary. The drink had worked so far but now that they were on their way to see Coach Sylvester, it wouldn't hurt to take precautions.
"CARLY!" Gibby's voice said into the phone. Carly smiled at the sound of their silly friend's voice and frowned at the fact that they hadn't seen him in weeks.
"Hey Gib," She greeted, "What's up?"
"Well, you remember how you and Sam and Freddie said you joined the singing Koala bears?"
"You mean the Glee club?" Carly asked, confused.
"Yeah, that. Whatever. Well I talked with Principal Franklin and my Mom. They said that me, Guppy, Principal Franklin, Wendy, and Rip-Off-Rodney are going to be driving up there for Seasonals!" Gibby told her.
"You mean regionals?"
"Whatever! Just be prepared in a few short weeks, for a huge explosion of GIBBY!" GIbby shouted into the phone and Carly winced.
"That's great, Gibby!" Carly enthused, "But I've got to go, me and Sam are gonna go get ready for Cheerios practice."
"I still can't believe Sam is a cheerleader..." GIbby mumbled, and then his tone of voice changed, "Before you go, I guess that was some party you guys went to last Friday?"
"How did you know about the party?" Carly and Sam walk into the locker room.
"The pictures you were tagged in on Splashface... You guys must have been wasted!"
"Oh my gosh!" Carly exclaimed, looking at Sam who had collapsed on the hard locker room bench, in search for a short nap. Sam looked up at Carly and wrinkled her eyebrows and then slowly sat up.
"What did Gibby do this time?" Sam asked exasperatedly and then shouted into the phone at Carly's ear, "Gibby? Do I need to introduce you to my fists again? Do you remember Hammy and Steakknuckles?" She threatened, but Sam pulled the phone away and looked at Sam with wide eyes.
"We were tagged in pictures from Rachel's party? When did you last check your splashface?"
Sam frowned, "Not since last week. I was too hungover to do anything this weekend."
"Me too!" Carly exclaimed, totally forgetting about Gibby and her phone, which she shoved into her bag as she and Sam pulled their practice clothes out and started to get dressed. "Come over after practice and text Freddie and Quinn and Mercedes, I have GOT to see what's going on!"
"Where is that nerdface?" Sam demanded that evening. She, Carly, Quinn, and Mercedes had gathered at the Shay apartment because none of them had checked their Splashfaces all weekend. Carly insisted they wait for Freddie to get there before they started, but her patience was also running thin.
"I don't know but he needs to hurry up!" Carly exclaimed. The door to the apartment burst open and Freddie came running in.
"About time!" Mercedes said.
"Sorry," Freddie panted, "I was-" But Sam cut him off.
"Don't care." She told him and then marched over to the computer and logged onto her Splashface, "Let's just do it." Everyone gathered around her and the desktop as the page loaded. Her homescreen popped up and informed her that she had 35 notifications!
Noah Puckerman has tagged 22 pictures of you.
And various notifications telling her that multiple people had commented on these pictures. Sam clicked on the album containing the photos and everyone gasped.
"Oh. My. Ham." Sam breathed, and everyone else just gaped at the screen. The first picture in the album was one of Carly licking alcohol off of Sam's exposed stomach.
"I don't even remember that..." Carly said quietly.
"Me neither, and you think I'd remember someone licking my stomach..." Sam replied.
"Just keep going," Quinn told Sam, "Let's just look at them all, then we can be shocked and ashamed."
Sam slowly clicked through all of the pictures, all of them examining each of them closely. There was one of Brittany and Santana doing the body shots, one of Quinn and Lauren yelling at each other (With a caption: 'Girls are always fighting over me ;)'], there was one of Brittany standing on top of the washing machine, wearing only her bra and bottoms while Artie threw money at her. There was one of Mercedes and Tina sitting on a couch falling over laughing, there were two of peoples feet, and three of Finn raising his eyebrows at the camera. There was one of Blaine and Rachel singing their duet and one of Carly and Sam singing theirs. There was another picture of Blaine in the process of shaking his head around. There were five picture of various Glee clubbers dancing. Two of the pictures were of Puck. The last two pictures, though, made everyone's mouths fall open.
One of the pictures was of Carly and Puck kissing during spin the bottle. Carly's eyes widened and she tried to hide a smile."Oh my gosh." She put her hand to her mouth and gaped at the photo. Quinn gave her a funny look, but she ignored it. Sam scrolled down to look at the comments for this one.
Mike Chang: Get it Puckerman! ;)
Lauren Zizes: The fuck Puckerman?
"Ooh!" Sam exclaimed, laughing, "Realtionship drama. I love it."
"Actually, I talked to Kurt, and he said that Lauren made out with Mike after you and Carly kissed." Mercedes commented.
"That makes it even better!"
"Wait." Freddie said, "Let's look at the last picture before Sam starts her 'I think it's funny when other people are in pain' thing." He leaned over Sam's shoulder and clicked the next button. Everyone gasped even louder this time and Freddie jumped back away from the computer as Sam's eyes widened and her body seemed to freeze. The last picture was a picture of Sam and Freddie, kissing.