This one's truly awful and I'm pretty sure I did not do Sue justice, but I couldn't think of anything other than this with her.

Sue.

Kurt was sitting in a situation he'd never thought was even possible.

Opposite Sue, in BreadStix of all places!

Granted, they were both waiting for someone, but still. It was weird.

Kurt's back was hurting. He'd slipped on the stairs that morning and although he'd expected to sprain his ankle or something normal like that, he of course had to do things different again. So, he'd somehow managed to bounce all the way down the lower half of the stairs.

…

On his butt…

So that had led to the lower half of his back hurting like hell.

Miss Sylvester was pregnant and definitely not looking for much of a conversation, as Kurt soon figured out by her short answers. Not that he himself would like to have any sort of conversation with her.

All she said when she'd sat down without waiting or even asking for his permission, was:

'Hello, there, Porcelain. I don't care if you mind me sitting down, since you do not carry a baby between those pear hips yet, not even a gay one. I saw Young Burt Reynolds standing outside, talking with Mister Illegally Blonde and Captain Hooknose. How come he's not sitting here, watching you look like you got an F on a test in French class?'

'Oh, you bounced down the stairs on your butt? Poor stairs, probably covered in rainbows, thanks to you. I'm waiting for my old lady to finally show up.'

Of course she'd feel sorry for the stairs instead of him. He couldn't even bring himself to act surprised, let alone actually be it.

But, if he was honest, he'd rather have had Blaine with him, since he's never been very keen on having Miss Sylvester be so degrading while he was alone. It's not like he ever knew what to say or how to react.

And Blaine just had to run into the Warblers Nick and Jeff and, while all four boys had made amends, since the Michael Jackson Slushie Disaster, Kurt didn't like the idea of having to stay outside, standing in the cold, with his back practically killing him.

So, Blaine, who had thankfully noticed Kurt's pained look, had told the pale boy to go inside and wait for him. He also told him he'd be inside soon, but by now, it had been more than ten minutes ago and Kurt was actually getting a little anxious with Sue sitting so near him.

So he did what he always tried to resist doing in these kind of situations. He started humming the first song that came to his mind.

He saw Miss Sylvester side-eyeing him with raised eyebrows for a while, before she turned her full attention on him so abruptly that he quit humming immediately.

'Porcelain.'

'Coach Sylvester?'

'Were you just humming a song of Hanson?'

'… Yes?'

'Wow. I'd never have expected you to finally get good taste in music.'

'I found them through Blaine…'

'So he does have something useful somewhere in that tiny, weak Hobbit thing he calls a body, then, hmm?'

'Blaine is not weak!'

'Sure he isn't.'

Kurt gaped at her, but when she only smirked, he knew it was useless to try and argue with her. So, he didn't, instead opting to glance at the door, just in time to see Blaine walking in at last. He was followed by a red-haired woman, who, in Kurt's eyes, strongly resembled a fish.

Coach Sylvester got up as Blaine approached their table. He shot a questioning glance at Kurt, who merely waved his hand dismissively, making Blaine shut his mouth, until he got pushed out of the way.

'Hey!' He said, slightly offended, but all it got him was a rather arrogant glare from both the Sylvester women. However, he shrugged it off, not planning on letting his evening with Kurt be ruined by them. So he sat down without another look at them.

'What was that about?'

Kurt merely raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at his boyfriend. Blaine nodded.

'Don't ask. Got it.'

I cannot explain myself.