Chapter 23

Christmas Eve arrived at the castle with a bitter snowstorm. Candles were lit along every corridor, and every fire place burned brightly and threw heat across the rooms they adorned. There were only a select few students who had stayed at Hogwarts for the holidays, and the castle seemed cold and empty despite the few stragglers. Sirius sat in the same spot on the sofa in the common room as he always had, and stared into space. He had come to terms with wanting Olivia's forgiveness, and why he needed it, but he wasn't sure if he could really accept that he loved her. Did he love her? Was it just indigestion? Was love even real? He thought of Lily and James and pushed the thought aside. It was real, those two were hopelessly in love to an almost sickening point, but what Sirius couldn't determine was if he was capable of love. More importantly, would Olivia ever be capable of loving him back. He was never going to get anywhere if he kept going in depressing circles, he thought to himself. He heard a door open and looked up toward the staircase. He saw Remus come down, looking tired and bedraggled.

"I don't know how I survive." He moaned.

Sirius smiled sympathetically. "It's alright mate, I thought last night went pretty well."

Remus gave him a sideways glance. "From what I remember from the fighting, you were particularly aggressive."

Sirius pursed his lips and looked away. "Sorry." He said simply. "I have a lot on my mind."

Remus smiled. "You-"

Sirius stopped him by bolting up right. "If you say it too, I'm going to reenact the moment I smashed your face into the floor." He said menacingly.

Remus looked taken aback. "I was going to say- You know what we should do today? We should go to Hogsmeade and store up because the weather looks like we'll be stuck inside for most of this break…but now I'm interested in what you thought I was about to say." He said slyly.

Sirius snapped his lips shut and pressed them together in a thin line. His cheeks felt singed and his pride hurt a little for jumping to conclusions.

"That's a great idea, we should do that, meet you tonight." Sirius said quickly, standing up and leaving quickly.

Remus chuckled softly as Sirius fell up the stairs in his hurry to get away.

Sirius slammed into his dorm and fell face first onto his bed. If he was going to get anywhere at all with Olivia he needed to stop being so defensive. He resolved to at least try harder at not assuming everyone knew he loved her, even though he hadn't truly admitted it to himself yet, because he didn't yet…maybe…Sirius put a hand on the back of his head and moaned. Ok he liked her a lot; he decided to go with that one. Since he liked Olivia a lot and cared about her feelings, he would resolve to start pursuing the bet a lot less. He smiled. Sirius could handle that much.

-Christmas morning-

Sirius happily bobbed down the stairs heading for breakfast when he noticed a small figure curled in a ball on the sofa on the furthest side of the room. He stopped mid-stride when he realized it was Olivia.

"What are you doing here?" He asked curiously, in a pitch a tad too high for his own liking.

Olivia was still in her oversized pajama bottoms and a tank top, lounging on her perch, almost cat like. She had a steaming mug in her hand as she lazily acknowledged him.

"Enjoying my morning." She said simply, holding up her mug.

"But I thought you were leaving." He stood there staring at her, confused.

Olivia looked into her mug. "Have you ever had Wonda's coffee? It's like love in a cup. Now I love my tea, don't get me wrong, but this Pumpkin Spice Latte is to die for." She said, completely ignoring his question and taking a sip of her coffee.

"Who in bloody hell is Wonda? Why are you here?" Sirius asked again.

Olivia frowned. "Wonda is a house elf and she is the reason for every delicious cup of tea or coffee in the entire castle. It's her specialty." Taking another sip, she smiled.

Sirius sighed and walked over to her. He had planned to think of ways to make everything up to her over the holiday break, but now he'd have to wing it.

"Well, you look really beautiful." He said, hoping not to sound too obvious.

Olivia narrowed her gaze at him but said nothing.

"I mean, the way you look with no makeup on, and your baggy clothes, it looks very natural. You should look like that all the time." He rambled nervously.

Olivia frowned. "So what you're saying is I look naturally frumpy and plain?"

Sirius swallowed hard. "That's not what I said at all!"

Olivia smiled mischievously. "That's exactly what you said." She took another sip of her coffee contemptuously.

Sirius took a deep breath. "I just meant that I like that you look natural. You have curves, and all the other girls don't, it makes you…you." He spoke slowly and as he did he could detect a slight twinkle in Olivia's eye as she raised her brows.

"Oh, and now I'm fat? You're quite the charmer Sirius." Olivia said mildly.

Sirius frowned. "I was trying to compliment you."

Olivia continued to smile. "I know. Why?"

Sirius pursed his lips, "Because you deserve it." He said grudgingly.

Olivia set down her cup and stood up, hands on her hips she stared across at Sirius. "I think you should leave me alone Sirius." Without another word, she turned around and walked back up to her empty dorm room.

Sirius smacked his face angrily, dragging his palm down in frustration. "It's going to be a long bloody holiday." He moaned.

"Did you know she was still here?" Sirius asked Remus and Peter, waving his arms around wildly as he paced his dorm.

The two boys shook their heads, exchanging looks when Sirius wasn't looking. Sirius altered between running his hands through his hair, to shaking his fists.

"Why did she tell me she was leaving if she wasn't? Why is she here? I don't understand!" He said again for the hundredth time.

"Well either she wanted to surprise you and humiliate you, or she didn't want you to know she was here and avoid you the whole time." Peter said rationally.

Sirius stopped and glared at him. "As reasonable as those answers are, I was speaking rhetorically."

Remus laughed. "Go talk to her. You're only going to get answers from her…not us."

Sirius sighed. "Fine, but what is there to say? I mean…I'm pretty sure she didn't tell me because she hates me. It figures I finally admit that I lo-" Sirius stopped and faltered. "Admit that I like her a lot…she hates me again." His eyes shifted rapidly back and forth between his two friends nervously.

Remus and Peter rolled their eyes, stood up, and shoved him out of the dorm, locking it behind them.

Sirius stared at the door. "Bloody traitors."

He turned around and jumped when he saw Olivia standing behind him, staring at him curiously.

She shifted nervously. "Sorry, I was just-I wanted to…. I can talk to you another time." She began to turn when she felt his hand on hers.

"I was just coming to talk to you, actually." He said softly.

"Why?" Olivia asked a bit too harshly.

"Why were you coming to talk to me?" He countered with a grin.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "I wanted to apologize for being snappy this morning. I don't know why I should, but I am." She grabbed her arms and looked at the floor, her hair falling over her shoulders.

"I want to call off the bet." Sirius said suddenly.

Olivia's eyes snapped to his and her gaze narrowed. "Who are you trying to fool Sirius, me or yourself?"

Sirius frowned. "And what is that supposed to mean?"

Olivia sighed. "You don't want to call off the bet. Your ego and pride won't let you." She said haughtily.

Sirius glared. "I resent that statement."

"Resent it all you want, it's true isn't it?" Olivia landed her hands on her hips and braced herself for a fight.

"I resent it, because I meant it." Sirius resisted the urge to laugh at his unintended rhyme.

Olivia's eyebrows rose. "Why?"

"I want to be your friend." Sirius said, swallowing hard. "I've decided I kind of like you."

Olivia let out a loud, "HA!" on impulse; she covered her mouth with her hand, trying not to laugh harder.

Sirius stared at her evenly. "When you told me that I had been hurting you, it made me realize that you were right. I was hurting you, and it was unnecessary. I'm not you Olivia, I don't hurt people for my own gain."

Olivia looked like she had been struck in the face. "Since when?" She snapped.

"Since now." He looked at her with a level gaze and took a deep breath.

Olivia pursed her lips so tightly she looked like she would pop. Her eyes were glazed as if she were holding back tears.

"I don't know why you're mad. Isn't that what you wanted all along? For me to call off the bet? Be friends?" Sirius asked, trying to keep his voice steady.

Olivia nodded. "You're an ass." She said quietly, a tear slipping down her cheek.

Sirius smiled lightly. "I'm both proud and ashamed of this."

Olivia laughed unintentionally. "We're quite the pair Sirius."

Sirius stepped closer to her and grabbed her hands. "I can't promise you anything." He said as he looked into her eyes.

"Why are you doing this Sirius? Why are you calling off the bet? Why are we still standing in the middle of the hallway?" Olivia asked curiously, looking around.

Sirius put a finger to her lips. "I'm doing this, because I wanted to make it up to you. I really do want to be friends Olivia."

Olivia stepped back slightly. "You already made it up to me by telling me you put Peter up to the task of spying on me."

"Then you slapped me."

"Oh right." Olivia put a hand under her chin and thought a moment. "That's it then? You just want to be friends?"

Sirius nodded and stepped closer to her again, leaning in with a smile.

With a mischievous grin she pulled him in and hugged him, patting him heartily on the back. Pushing him away she winked at him. "Well then friend, Happy Christmas."

As she walked off Sirius frowned.

"I meant friends with benefits!" He called after her.

She waved at him without looking back as she walked into the hallway leading to her dorm.

"He'll never learn." She sighed to herself.