Just a short one this time. Sorry about the wait. Gigantic thanks to "Nanily" who has faithfully reviewed every chapter and put up with me teasing her about things she does not know yet. We both wanted to say a huge "thank-you" for that. This one's for you.

Chapter 12: Heights

Once the Williams' had left, the light that had come into Jack's eyes when Anwen launched herself at him went out like a snuffed candle. He leant more heavily on Ianto and more longing rolled down their bond. He wanted that brief glimpse he'd had more than anything. I wish... He started only to be interrupted by Tosh and Owen coming back in. Jack had sent them out to get dinner or something, he didn't really care what they'd done but he'd wanted to talk to Gwen on his own, well... mostly on his own. With an internal sigh he stepped away from Ianto and assumed his "Captain demeanour". "Mrs Williams has gone home. She is on paid suspension until we all decide what we should do. Admittedly, it was mostly my fault this happened but, the shock of... what occurred," he couldn't brining himself to say "killing Ianto", "seems to have brought her back to her right mind. Keep that in mind, all of you. Gwen wasn't herself when this happened." He met each of their eyes in turn, impressing that fact upon them. "She didn't know what she was doing and I fully believe it was an accident anyhow."

Suddenly, he couldn't bear to look at any of them. He had to get out. Grabbing his coat from where he'd draped it over the back of a chair and hastened from the Hub. He ran down the streets of Cardiff, coat flying behind him. Luckily it was a foul night so not many people were out, so no-one commented on the man in period military dress fleeing down the streets. Finally, he came to a favourite rooftop of his and clambered up to it. Once on the room, the panic that had gripped his heart, sending him out into the night drained away. Jack liked rooftops. They gave him perspective. As odd as it sounded, they grounded him, brought him back to their version of reality. Jack felt drained, emotionless as he slumped down against a handy pillar, leaning back against it. It was all... too much to take in right now.

Ianto held Jack soothingly until Owen and Tosh came in and he pulled away, which was unlike him, but when Ianto felt him steel himself and turn into Captain mode he didn't press or let on. he too wanted what Jack wanted as well, just hadn't realised how strongly jack wanted it. He'd find a way somehow, even if he and Jack donated and they found a mother willing to carry a child to term for them, or something. At least he or Jack would be the father then. One of them could be a parent.

He was shaken from his thoughts when Jack suddenly grabbed his coat and left in a hurry. He was so quick Ianto didn't have a chance to call out, mentally or physically. Owen and Tosh looked at him and he shook his head. Jack needed some space, from everyone, even him sometimes. Through the bond though, he could still feel Jack no matter how far away he went.

He left Jack for a couple of hours, doing some work around the hub, but when Jack's mood didn't change, he sighed, grabbed his coat and went after him. He followed the bond and found Jack on a rooftop, no surprise there. He stood in the doorway of the roof access and looked at Jack sitting on the edge leaning against a pillar. Ianto had a mild phobia about heights, especially being this far up in the open, immortal or not. Jack, he whispered through Jack's mind gently so as not to startle him, though Jack should have been able to sense him anyway.

Jack looked up, not startled by Ianto's presence in the least. He'd felt the younger man long before Ianto had decided to speak. "Hi," he croaked voice hoarse from lack of use.

A small smile quirked his lips as he felt Ianto's fear. "I won't let you fall Yan. Never would." Jack patted the spot beside him with the same tiny grin. "Come sit. I don't bite. 'Less you want me to o' course" The small grin turned into a pale imitation of his usual flirty smirk.

Ianto swallowed nervously but went and sat next to Jack. "Maybe later." He took Jack's hand in his. "What's wrong cariad?"

The Captain fiddled with his partner's wedding ring, turning it over and over on his finger. They'd gotten married about two years ago. Well, as close to "married" as two men could in 21st century Wales. It had annoyed Jack no end and he'd gone on a muttered rant for weeks about "narrow minded bigots" and "bloody morons" and about there being no such thing as homophobia in the 51st century. Whenever Jack was nervous or unsettled about something he would automatically start toying with his husband's wedding band. As if reassuring himself that Ianto was actually there and this all wasn't some pleasant dream he would wake up from one day. It also let the Welshman know that Jack would eventually talk to him, as soon as the Captain figured out how to put it into words.

Ianto rested his head against his husband's shoulder. He'd managed to stop Jack ranting by saying they would have a second wedding in the future when they could properly married. He waited to for Jack to speak, knowing he was just searching for the words.

He drew strength from the silent Welshman sitting at his side, curling one arm about Ianto's waist, the fingers of his other hand continuing to play with the wedding band. "I..." Jack started and then stopped, still not really knowing what he was trying to say. He took several deep breaths, inhaling the crisp, clean scent of his husband's skin. "It hurts too... you know? Seeing Anwen and what we could have... but can't." That made no sense but Jack hoped that Ianto understood what he was attempting to say anyway.

Ianto remained silent as Jack tried to find the words, then nodded. "I know what you mean, but I'm sure we can have children at some point. I mean for men to have children in the future there has to be some sort of breakthrough, I can go for the procedure then. In the meantime we can adopt or..." he trailed off.

Jack kissed him softly on the corner of the lips, already feeling lighter somehow. Ianto always knew precisely what to say to draw him out of his "funks" as the Welshman had termed them once. "I know, I was just being stupid." He sighed and hugged the younger man with one arm. "Now, I know you hate heights, shall we go home and... celebrate properly?" He grinned suggestively, already looking, and feeling like his usual self.

Ianto turned and kissed Jack. "You weren't being stupid, I felt the same, but it sounds good to me." He was glad to get off the roof, besides it was cold up here. He stood up carefully and held out his hand for Jack. "Shall we?"

Still grinning, Jack took the offered hand and clambered to his feet. "We shall."

Once home, clothes fell off with a speed heretofore unseen and both men were soon sweaty and sated, curled together loosely on the couch. They'd never gotten as far as the bedroom.

They'd managed to keep their barriers up so they hadn't blacked out this time. Ianto curled against Jack happy. He was sleepy from the rough day, first dying then fantastic ex as normal, and he soon drifted to sleep.

Jack held the younger man close and soon fell off to sleep himself.