Hey! Before you all start screaming at me, I had this shitty case of the flu that went on for a couple of days, so I haven't been updating recently. Sorry, guys! But I'm all better now. *vomits over a bowl* Actually. . .fuck.

ANYWAYS, this chapter is longer (9 pages on Microsoft Word!) so I hope it makes up for it. And I have a break from school this week, so YAY!

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own The Suite Life on Deck in any way, shape, or form, and I probably never will.
DISCLAIMER 2: I do NOT own the Gettysburg Address, or the song Rolling in the Deep. Those belong to Abraham Lincoln and Adele, respectively.

. . .You'll find out later.

"I need one more Banana Fofana!"

"One Tangerine Tickle, please."

"May I please have three Kiwi Krushes?"

"I'd like a Cherry Chiller with some lemon slices on the side – "

"Hey there, could I have two Peach Perfections with some extra vanilla ice cream?"

Maya groaned, placing her head in her hands as she tried desperately to keep up with the demanding customers, but to no avail. "Great. The one thing that could make this worse is – " As if on cue, Alex and Caleb began to wail in sync.

At that moment, Zack was walking by. "Hey there, Maya-kitten, how's work coming along – He frowned at the sight. "That bad, huh?"

"Thanks for volunteering to help," she yelled above the roar of the crowd and the blender as she made her way to Alex and Caleb, dropping a banana slice in the process. She muttered some very unflattering words.

"Sorry," Zack said sympathetically, making his way through the mob and behind the counter. "You take care of the kids, and I'll take over for a while."

Maya gave him a grateful look. "Would you?"

"Yeah, sure," he said, expertly slicing some tangerines and putting them in a blender.

"Thanks," she said, taking both babies into her arms and rocking them gently back and forth.

Just then, Bailey and Cody appeared. "Hey there, Maya, Zack," Bailey said.

"'Sup, Bailey?" she offered. "How's Chris?"

"A handful," Cody exhaled, running his hand through his unruly hair. "Man, it seems like he poops every half hour."

Maya laughed. "We've got two of 'em, so you can't say much."

Cody grinned in response. "You've got a point." He frowned at the busy mob, which Zack was still trying to placate. "Busy day, huh?"

"You don't say," Maya sighed, the twins calming down. She put them back and washed her hands, promptly picking up a kiwi.

"Sorry I can't help," Cody said sympathetically. "My towel shift's right now."

Maya waved aside the matter. "It's alright."

"I'm helping Cody with his job," Bailey apologized. "But his shift ends ten minutes earlier than yours – I can help you then."

Zack smiled at her but shook his head. "Nah, it's okay, you go and have fun with Codester afterwards." He winked at her. "Not too much fun, okay?"

"ZACK!" three voices yelled.

Zack gave his infamous grin. "Just keep it PG."

Maya gave him a smack, though a smile was on her face. "Thanks for stopping by, guys."

Bailey and Cody waved at her, shouting a "Good luck!" before disappearing.

London and Marcus walked by with their baby girl, who was currently wailing at the top of her lungs. "Shh, Rosie, it's okay," Marcus cooed, trying to calm her down.

Zack smiled. "You named her Rosie?"

"Nooooo," London said, drawing out the syllable as if it were completely obvious. "Her real name is Rosalina Marilyn Isabella Sapphire Raven Nightwing Katherine Lauren Madeline Sophia Chloe Elizabeth Ariana Tipton, and we call her Rosie for short." She exhaled in a puff of air. "Duh."

"Her idea, not mine," Marcus stage-whispered, earning knowing glances from both Zack and Maya. They both waved and walked off, a crying Rosie in tow.

"And yet, she doesn't know how to spell cat," Maya muttered, earning a laugh from Zack.

Woody appeared with Addison, holding Pat. "Hey, guys," he greeted them.

"Hi," Maya said, and Zack nodded a greeting. "How's Pat?"

"He's cool," Woody replied. "If his head doesn't pop off, it's been a good day."

Addison laughed. "Yeah, he tends to do that."

Woody grinned, shifting Pat to his other arm. Just then, his head fell off and rolled across the Sky Deck's floor, eliciting a couple of screams from the customers nearby.

"Oops," Woody said sheepishly, picking the head back up and screwing it on in embarrassment. "Anyways, I wanted to give you guys something." He produced a baby carrier that looked like a backpack. "Sorry, I only have one. But since you have twins, I bet that if Zack could carry a baby on his back and you could hold one, life would be easier."

Maya smiled as she accepted his gift. "Thanks, Woody, you're the best."

"Hey!" Zack complained. "I'm your boyfriend."

Maya rolled her eyes and kissed him swiftly. "Has your ego been restored, Your Majesty?"

"Yes, thank you, my princess," Zack replied cheekily, making her blush.

Zack strapped the baby carrier on, placing baby Caleb safely in it. "There we go, much better now!"

Woody, who had brought Addison along with him, grinned. "See, I told ya!"

"Yeah, I owe you one, Woody."

"Woody. Addison." Mr. Moseby strode over to them. His eyes landed on the baby strapped to Zack's back. ". . .Sacajawea."

Zack glared at him.

"How many times do I have to say it? These. . .things are not allowed on the Sky Deck!"

"But our babies are really well-behaved!" Woody protested.

"If he starts crying, we'll take himi below decks," Addison promised. As if on cue, Patrick started crying. "...So we'll take him below decks."

"Aw man, kids ruin everything." Woody muttered, getting off his stool and following Addison.

"Welcome to my world." Mr. Moseby agreed.

Then, he eyed Zack warily. "If your babies remain quiet, I'll allow them to stay. But if they make so much as a peep, you'll have to take them elsewhere."

"Thanks, Moseby!" Zack said, grinning. "I'm sure Caleb will appreciate it."

"You're welcome. Did you say his name was Caleb?"

"Well, I wanted to name the baby Marion, after you.. . ." Zack said. "But we had a boy."

Mr. Moseby's benevolent expression darkened. "You're pushing it."

"Sorry."

"She is kinda cute," London mused, watching Maya rocking Alex back and forth, with Rosie currently sleeping. "Can I hold her?"

"Sure," Maya agreed, handing over her baby.

She reached out her arms for the baby and settled her over her shoulder. "Aww," she said, smiling genuinely. "Allison's adorable!"

"It's Alex."

London froze as she felt dampness. "Eww!" she shrieked, tossing Alex onto the bed, thankfully.

"London!" Maya cried. "Don't throw her around!"

"But she's wet!" London wailed. "And I touched it! Ew-ew-ew!" She hopped around comically, flailing her hands about.

"London, she's a doll, it's just water!" Maya said, exasperated. "Just give her back to me."

Gingerly, London placed Alex back into Maya's arms, taking extra care not to let her hand anywhere near the wet spot. "There, happy?"

"Very," Maya said dryly, London not catching the sarcasm.

London sighed, before looking at her hand and noticing the miniscule drops of water on her hand. "Ew-ew-ew, she peed on meeee!"

Maya checked her watch, groaning. "This is going to be the longest week of my life."

"Wahhh!"

The clock on the nightstand read 1:20 am, and Cody and Woody both moaned, stirring out of a deep sleep. Cody reached over and flicked on the light. "I think it's yours," they both groaned at the same time.

Woody spoke first. "No, it's yours."

Cody opened his mouth to retort, before walking over to the makeshift cribs and finding out that he was right, for once. "Okay, there, Chris, what's the matter?" He checked his diaper, finding it to be dry. He frowned. "Hungry, buddy?"

"No, for once! Just tired!" Woody groaned. "Now shut him up before he wakes Pat."

"I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to - " Cody stopped abruptly as Woody's baby started wailing as well. "Oops."

Woody cursed, dragging himself out of bed and to Patrick.

"Please, Rosie, just calm down," London begged, rocking Rosie back and forth in a vain attempt to quiet her down. Finallly, she grew frustrated, throwing her baby down on the bed. "Mommy needs her beauty rest, dammit!"

Bailey groaned and sat up in bed groggily, her hair a mess. "What's wrong?"

"Rosalina Marilyn Isabella Sapphi – "

"ROSIE!"

"Rosie's being loud and I can't get her to be quiet!" London pouted.

Bailey sighed, and held out her arms. "C'mon, give her to me. I've had some experiences with babies."

London reluctantly handed her over to Bailey. After five minutes with no change, the heiress threw up her hands in frustration. "All right, give her back, farm girl."

Bailey was too tired to retort to the insult, handing the baby back half-heartedly.

London sighed and rocked Rosie, freezing once again when she felt a dampness on her hand. "Ew-ew-ew-ew-EWWW!" she shrieked, only serving to make Rosie cry even louder. Now, Bailey had to deal with a crying London and a wailing Rosie.

"My baby's too noisy!"

"Waaaahh!"

"I hate this stupid sea school!"

"Waaaahh!"

"My roommate smells like wet hay!"

"Waaaahh!"

"SHUT UP!" Bailey shrieked, flinging a pillow at London, burying herself under one, and stuffing her hands in her ears in an effort to block out the noise.

None of them got much sleep that night.

"There, there, Caleb," Zack cooed, rocking the crying baby back and forth. "Shh, it's alright, Daddy's here." He frowned as a thought came to him. "Do you miss your sister? Sorry about that, Allie's with Maya."

Caleb calmed down for a minute before crying again, rousing Marcus from his sleep.

"I'm coming, Mother. . ." Marcus muttered before his eyes fell on Zack. ". . .That's not my mother."

"Darn right it's not," Zack scoffed.

"Well, you are holding a baby," Marcus pointed out. At a glare from Zack, he quickly amended his statement. ". . .Sorry."

Zack rolled his eyes, rocking Caleb back and forth. "You're lucky, Marcus – your baby is with London."

"Yeah, that was a bad idea," he sighed, running his hands through his hair.

"Caaaaleeeb," Zack said, drawing out the vowels in his name. "What's wrong?" He checked the diaper, which was completely dry. He had also just fed the baby. "I think he's just fussy."

"You THINK?!" yelled Marcus, earning a fresh round of sobs from Caleb.

"Thanks for that, Marcus," Zack yawned, glaring at him.

Caleb sighed for a moment and took a deep breath.

"Oh, good," Marcus sighed in relief.

Zack's eyes widened. "No, that's not good! When he takes a deep breath it means that he's gonna – "

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

"Addison," Maya said softly, shaking her roommate. "Could you wake up?"

Her roommate snorted and rolled over. "Hmm? What's up?" Her eyes suddenly flew open. "Oh-my-gosh-little-Alex-is-crying-I-can-calm-her-down-here-give-her-to-me!"

Maya wasn't prepared for the sudden stream of words at one in the morning, but she was grateful for Addison anyways, handing Alex over. "Thanks, Addison. She's been crying for an hour and I can't get her to stop."

"It's okay!" the girl said enthusiastically, swinging Alex back and forth. She started mumbling under her breath.

Maya frowned sleepily. "Addison, what are you – " She stopped. "Are you reciting the Gettysburg Address to my baby?!"

". . .and government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth. What, Maya? Oh, yeah, I am," she replied, after finishing the last of her speech. She took a deep breath and started singing. "There's a fire, starting in my heart. . ."

"Rolling in the Deep, Adele," Maya said thoughtfully, as baby Alex continued to wail loudly. "Huh. You learn something new every day."

. . .See? I told you.
ANYWAYS, this week is break (like I said), so expect chapters to come faster!

As always, read and review!